Hi everyone! This is a belated secret santa present for the wonderful xswanandhookx over on Tumblr. Hope you like it! :)
"Life is a lot like dance, it's all about finding the right partner to make you waltz, and once you find that one person, everything is just easy, natural, dancing becomes life, all of that in the safe embrace of the right person, your person."
Emma would never forget their first dance. He'd followed her across realms, across time, seamlessly adapting to the dangers and consequences of their new situation and at her side no matter the cost. They were stressed and tired and there was so much at stake, her mind racing, constantly trying to anticipate any possible consequences of their actions before they did something else to damage the future.
But then they danced, and it all disappeared.
Everything about blending into the Enchanted Forest lifestyle was new and uncertain for Emma, but the party was overwhelming on a whole new level. Her dress was uncomfortable, she fumbled her way through introductions using a Star Wars alias, and just when she was starting to panic about what she'd have to do next he'd taken her hand and led her to the floor.
"There's only one rule; pick a partner who knows what he's doing."
He'd gently placed her hands in the right positions and then it began. A slight press of his hand at her back to bring her forward, raising one arm and a nudge from the other to lead her into a turn, and always returning to the base position in his arms. All her other concerns left her as she concentrated on each moment, following his lead and, for the first time in a long time, feeling safe.
He expertly whirled her across the floor, taking her away from everything that was haunting her. It was gentle yet secure, it was intoxicating, it was beautiful. And even though the rest of that night was chaotic, she never forgot that feeling.
"Swan? It's okay, love, just breathe. You're alright, we just need to get you warmed up."
She was hardly aware of anything but the cold that seemed to be consuming her from all sides. She was being jostled as Killian carried her somewhere (the car?) but she could hardly think straight to confirm that idea. Soon enough she felt herself being pulled onto his lap in the backseat (she was right) as her dad drove them back to the loft as fast as possible.
"Just hold on, Swan, it's going to be okay." There was a tremor in Killian's voice as he held her close, rubbing her back with his good hand and holding her in place with his hook arm. He felt so warm that she couldn't help but snuggle closer, wanting desperately to be surrounded by him to soak up his body heat and affection. Dimly, she heard her father's voice from the front seat, and felt Killian's chest rumble as he replied, and then pulled her shivering form even closer. "We're almost there, darling, just a little longer." She nodded jerkily in response, trying in vain to get control over her body and to think clearly. She just needed to stay conscious, Killian would take care of the rest.
She was being carried again, and finally set down on an armchair in the loft, blankets piled onto her and Killian's hand finding hers.
"Mom! Are you okay? You need to warm up, mom, come on!" She reached her free hand out for Henry and he took it in both of his immediately.
"I'm fine, kid. Don't worry," she murmured and squeezed his hand to reassure him further.
She could feel Killian close at her left side, now gently rubbing her back and occasionally pressing a soft kiss to her hair. Completely exhausted, she rested her head on his shoulder, revelling in the warmth and comfort emanating from him. As she slowly regained feeling in her limbs and her body heat was restored, she couldn't help but be grateful for his presence at her side, and marvelled at his loyalty and determination to help her at any cost.
In what felt like no time at all, she realised she was being carried again, and her eyes fluttered open. "It's alright, love, I'm just bringing you to your bed," Killian murmured, and she hummed her consent and drifted off once more, knowing she was safe in his arms.
When she awoke, sunlight was streaming in through the windows and she was sweating in her bed, under what looked like every blanket from the apartment. The heat was the first thing she noticed (it was glorious), but the second was Killian asleep on a chair next to her bed. It was clear that he'd stayed up all night watching over her, and her heart stuttered for a moment at the thought. As her mind drifted over the events of the evening, she realised just how afraid Killian and her family must have been, and how close she had come to freezing to death. She remembered the urgency in everyone's voices and actions, how careful they were with her, and was suddenly struck with the memory of Killian putting her in her bed and not making an innuendo about it.
He must have been terrified.
Glancing up at him again, she saw his features contort in his sleep and he mumbled something that sounded like her name. Nightmares.
"Killian!" She whispered, too weak to get up but wanting to wake him from his torment. "Killian, wake up!" He jolted awake and almost fell off the chair, but the clear anguish in his eyes took away all humour from the situation. His eyes widened when they met hers and his relief was apparent.
"Swan? You're alright?"
She gave him a small smile. "Yeah, Killian, I'm okay. Everything is fine now."
His whole body sagged with the weight of his relief and he rested his head in his hand, covering his face as his body started to shake slightly. Alarmed at his distress, she summoned every bit of energy she had to try and reassure him.
"Hey, Killian, it's okay," she spoke softly and calmly, waiting for him to look up again. "It was fine in the end! Everything is alright." When he didn't seem to respond she starting trying to pull herself up into a sitting position, finding the effort draining but needing to be there for him. Her grunt as she attempted it alerted him to her movement and he hastened to her side to stop her.
"Swan, don't. Just stay in bed, you need to rest, love."
She raised an eyebrow. "But you're upset. I want to help."
"I'll be fine. You just gave us quite a scare, that's all." He let out a shuddery breath and looked away when he realised she'd noticed.
"What can I do?" Emma asked, an earnest expression on her face as she waited for his next words.
Uncharacteristically timid all of a sudden, it took him a while to answer but she waited patiently. "Swan, I … Would it be objectionable to you for me to hold you? Just for a short time? Logically, I know you're alright now but I just need to…"
But she had already shuffled over in the bed to make room for him, and held her arms out. "Come here, pirate. I could use the extra warmth."
He slowly moved himself onto the bed, remaining on top of the covers (after all, he was always a gentleman) and carefully placed his arms around her shoulder and waist, pulling her gently into his side as if she was going to break if he moved too quickly. She snuggled into him, sliding one arm behind his back and resting her other hand on his chest, and buried her face in his neck. She hadn't realised how much she'd been craving the security of his arms until she was in them, and now she knew she never wanted to leave. She felt his shuddery exhale as he tightened his grip on her and pressed a kiss to her hair. They lay there for some time in a comfortable silence, wrapped up in each other. As Emma felt her fatigue beginning to creep back over her, she felt Killian start gently rocking them back and forth and felt a slight rumble in his chest as he began to quietly hum a tune. It sounded vaguely familiar to her, and it took her a minute to place it.
"Our waltz." She murmured. She felt his lips twitch into a smile and felt him place a gentle kiss to her temple.
"Yes, Swan. But no dancing for you just yet. Let's just lay here a while."
She hummed in contentment, snuggling further into his strong embrace and drifting slowly back to sleep.
It had been a week since she'd put his heart back into his chest, and he was still feeling the effects. She'd been reluctant to leave his side, often needing to reassure herself that he was okay, and so his new behaviour was quite obvious to her.
"Was it really horrible?" She blurted out the question before her internal filter could stop it, and saw his eyes widen from his position across from her at their table at Granny's. A raised eyebrow was her only response, so she elaborated. "Ever since you got your heart back I can see you … savouring everything. Every time you eat I see you pause to appreciate the taste, when a breeze hits your face outside you close your eyes for a moment to feel it stronger, even when…" She paused, feeling a blush creeping into her cheeks but forcing herself to go on, "…when you kiss me now…you take your time. Kiss me harder, longer, cradle my face and hold me so close to you as you take it all in. Does it really feel so different? Having it back?"
He paused before he answered, finishing chewing the food in his mouth as he thought of his answer. "It was like there was a barrier between me and everything else. All my senses were dulled. Nothing tasted or smelled as strong as before, my thoughts were sometimes scattered and all of my emotions came to me as if through a thick fog. Like when a sound is muffled but everything I felt was toned down."
She nodded, trying to imagine it and quietly glad she'd never had to experience that. He continued.
"And when I kissed you…it wasn't like before. Normally…normally I get lost in you, Swan. I never want to stop kissing you, stop pouring my affections into you so you can never doubt…" He realised the depth of what he was about to reveal and held himself back, knowing she wasn't quite ready for that just yet. "But he took that away. When my heart was gone, I couldn't feel any of it. I knew I wanted to kiss you, but even when I did it was as if there was something between us, stopping me from feeling it properly…" He trailed off, staring into the distance with a sad expression on his face, and a dull ache began in her chest. She stood quickly, switched to his side of the booth and took his hand in hers, the movement jolting him out of his internal musings.
"So yes, Swan, now that I have my heart back I intend to appreciate everything. There are more good moments than I had initially realised, and I am never going to take them for granted again."
She nodded, looking at her lap and fiddling with his fingers as she gathered the courage for what she was about to say.
"Killian?" She finally looked up at him, finding his blue eyes wide and already focused on her. "I know I didn't ask you what the problem was, and I'll regret it forever, but I could tell. I could tell you were different and I didn't know what it was, but I missed you. And I'm never going to let the quiet moments go unappreciated again either." And with that, she leaned in and gently pressed her lips to his, securing her promise and giving them both another moment to savour together.
1 year later…
The ceremony was over faster than she could blink, now just flashes of memory – the look on Killian's face when she appeared at the end of the aisle, her dad giving her away, Henry carrying the rings, her eyes watering as she promised to love Killian for all of time and he promised her right back, and the world stopping for a long and peaceful moment when his lips finally met hers.
Now they were waiting to make their entrance at the reception, a grand party her mother had insisted upon and she hadn't wanted to admit she'd wanted. He took her hand and squeezed as they heard Archie announce them.
"Please welcome the new Mr and Mrs Jones!" Everyone clapped as he lead her out to the centre of the room. "And now for their first dance as husband and wife." The lights dimmed and Killian pulled her close.
"This isn't our first dance." She murmured to him, a small smile tugging at her lips.
"Our first dance as a married couple, Swan."
"It's not Swan anymore." (he beamed at her) "And everyone's watching us! What if I trip? Maybe we should just sit down."
"Oh but darling, all the best adventures start with a dance."
She was grinning so hard her face was hurting, but she couldn't seem to stop. He squeezed her hand.
"Are you ready?"
She settled into his hold as the music began to swell.
"Always."
Thanks for reading everybody! This is actually the first fic I've written in about six years so I welcome any feedback you've got to give (just no hate - constructive criticism is good though). Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and New Year! 3