Courtney placed her head up against the wall, she couldn't help but stall, "My God what I have become? A broken woman with no second chances, who am I to say that you're to blame? I want to be who I say I am, but my actions show that I've turned into what I hate. And as I wonder, 'What do you think when you're staring down at me?' Is it time for me to intervene?"
Balling up her fist and punching the wall her heart snapped as tears strained down her face, "Consequences are interesting when the thorns penetrate but can't go deep enough to bleed. Oh how I wish right now that was the case of what kind of example I am. What if everyone knew me like you do?"
Her thoughts struck her hard and painfully, "I've always conformed to the way everyone has wanted me too, I've always behaved like the perfect girl my parents wanted me too. I always strove to be perfect child, speak when spoken too, complete any challenges and shoot for the stars."
Courtney looked down at her hands and sighed, "Every since I met Duncan everything has changed. He shoots for the stars but he doesn't hesitate to enjoy the scenery, he does wan he wants and he's free and happy. While I'm stuck in this gilded cage of being a perfect person, always having perfect hair and flawless skin, always doing what I'm told, but I'm far from freedom and happiness."
Looking into her reflection she longed to hear Duncan once more call her Princess, she longed to laugh and embrace being a rebel even at the expense of ruining her image to her high class friends and family, "I tried to make him into what my parents would have wanted, I tried to change him and cage him so everyone back home would approve," Courtney reflected on the thirty plus pages of his 'wrong doings' when in truth it was her who was in need of changing, "I want to be carefree, I want to live life on the edge and not be cautious. I want to be with Duncan."
Crumpling to the ground Courtney let out a heartfelt cry, "I'm lost and I'm ashamed, I tried to cage him and make him into something he's not. The only one of us who needs changing is me, but he would never give me a second chance."