Hiya peoples, it's me again! And this time I have something much more fun (and slightly perverted) up my sleeve. MUAHAHA!
Readers: 0o;;
Me: Riiiiiiiiight…well, I'll just be getting on with the fic now…oh, but before I go (and then come right back), here's a reference to how everyone will be speaking:
Me talking-"blablabla special huh?"
Random unnamed person (or event happening)-skip up "You're pretty" pick a daisy
Rurouni Kenshin character talking- Kenshin: I love you Kaoru-I mean blabla
Okie dokey then, oh and one more thing:
Disclaimer: I don't own Rurouni Kenshin sobs and I probably never will sobs harder. I'm so depressed only the torture of anime characters can cheer me up. Light bulb appears over head, "will you go away!" Hey! I can do that! MUAHAHA…
Anime Amore
"Hi, and welcome to Anime Amore! I'm your host, Kitty! Anime Amore is a show where to-be couples (muahaha) confess their love because everyone knows the anime shows don't have nearly enough romance for our twisted minds! Crowd claps and whistles
A man suddenly rushes out onto the stage "Hey Kitty, the show's started but the couples still aren't here! Where are they? …Oh, and will you sign my head?"
"Oh duh, how could I forget! And…uh…sure!" signs man's head "Okie dokey then…oh yeah! Right! The couples!
Abra ka dabra, okie de howers,
I call on my mighty authoress powers,
Bring forth the characters of Rurouni Kenshin
So I can have lots of fun torturi-I mean playing with them!
I snap my fingers and suddenly Kenshin, Kaoru, Sanosuke, Megumi, Yahiko, Tsubame, Aoshi, and Misao appear.
Random person in crowd "Was that spell really necessary? I thought you just had to snap your fingers and they'd appear!"
"Ya true, I just like saying that so go with it, k?"
Kenshin: Oh, Kitty-dono, it's you. May sessha ask why he is here, de gozaru ka?
Kaoru: Yeah, I was right in the middle of beating up Yahiko!
Yahiko: … edges away slowly
"Well, I poofed you all to my matchmaking game show so you can all become couples and live happily ever after with your true love."
Sano: But what if we don't want to be couples!
Me: You don't YET anyway…MUAHAHA
Yahiko: There goes that scary laugh again…hide me…
Misao: You mean we get to be couples now? YAY! PLEASE tell me I'm with Aoshi-sama! Tell me! Tell me! Tell meeeeeeeeeee!
Shakes me violently
(In between shakes) "Yes-you-will-be-with-A-o-shi-now-let-go-of-me-inless-you-want-to-be-paired-with-Shishio!"
Misao: Eep! lets go quickly You can do that!
"I can do all KINDS of things…muahaha…"
Everyone: 0o edges away slowly
Sano: Y-you don't like yaoi riiight?
"No don't worry (everyone breaths a sigh of relief) I'm not that sick! (a/n no offence to yaoi in real life but I just don't get in fanfictions…)"
Misao: Good, as long as I don't get paired with the brat, the rooster, or Himura…
Sano and Yahiko: HEY!
Megumi and Tsubame look slightly peeved-Kaoru is mad
Kaoru: AND WHAT EXACTLY IS WRONG WITH KENSHIN!
Misao: um…well…you know, you have to admit, he is kind sissy….wearing that pink gi and all…
Kenshin: This gi is not pink, de gozaru yo! It's magenta!
Kaoru: Well at least he's said more than five words in a sentence!
Misao: That was cold, Kaoru…
Kaoru: Ya, ice cold! Just like your crush!
Misao: THAT'S IT!
Tsubame: Oh my…
Kaoru and Misao start to fight, bokkens and kunai fly everywhere
Sano and Yahiko: Fight! Fight! Fight!
(To Megumi) "Bet you 200 yen that Kaoru wins."
Megumi: You're on. The tanuki's got spunk but my money's with the itachi.
Kenshin: Ororo…Hey Kitty-dono, wasn't there some reason you brought us here?
"Oh yeah. HEY EVERYONE! LISTEN UP!"
Everyone shuts up quickly
"We need to start the show already! The tv people are running out of commercials to stall with before the show starts!"
Somewhere with the film crews:
Director person: Hmm…maybe we could but the barney commercial on…
Employee: No sir, we've already run that one seven times! In fact, it's running right now!
A faint voice can be heard in the background, singing I love yoooouuuuuuu, you love meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. We're a great big familyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Director person: I could've been a barber, but nooooooooo! I had to pick this job!
Employee: Should I put the teletubbies add on next?
Back with the show
"Right, so anyway, let me announce the first couple that will be paired up. That would be…Kenshin and Kaoru! You guys so make a good couple!"
Kenshin and Kaoru blush, Kenshin "Oro!"
Everyone else: Well DUH!
Kenshin: …Is it really that obvious?
Megumi: Oh course! Fox ears spring up Everyone knows that you love each other!
Sano: Except you guys, apparently…
Kaoru: Kenshin, is it true? Do you love me?
Kenshin: Yes Kaoru, aishiteru, but I am so tainted with blood, how could you ever love me?
Kaoru: I told you before, I don't care about your past! I care about who you are now! You're a sweet, caring person who always thinks of others first and protects the weak! Aishiteru!
Kenshin: Kaoru…
Kenshin and Kaoru kiss, everyone thinks 'how sweet,' Yahiko: UGH! Make it stop!
Kenshin and Kaoru break the kiss, and await the next couple announcement. Kenshin snakes an arm around Kaoru's waist and Kaoru leans on his shoulder. (a/n Awwwwwwwww! Can't you just see that!)
"Well, my job's done with those two…moving on!"
Misao: Are Aoshi-sama and I next? PLEEEEEEASE tell me we're next!
"The next couple is…Sanosuke and Megumi!"
Sano and Megumi: WHAT?
Megumi: Sano, do you really love me? I've held in my feelings for so long but…how could you love me? I killed your best friend!
Sano: I told you to stop sayin' that! It's not like you wanted to make the opium! But how could you love me? I'm just a ruffian with no job who gambles and drinks!
Megumi: But you're a sexy ruffian! (fox ears)
Sano and Megumi kiss passionately, Sano: Oh Fox… Megumi: (gasp) Sano! Yahiko: (shielding his eyes) Three words. Get. A. Room.
Tsubame: giggling Yahiko!
Kenshin and Kaoru just smile, Kenshin tightens his hold around Kaoru's waist
Sano and Megumi finally stop, and stand smiling at each other
Misao: Me next! Me next!
"The next couple is…"
Misao: Please please please
Announcer dude: IT IS NOW TIME FOR A COMMERCIAL BREAK. WE WILL RETURN SHORTLY TO ANIME AMORE.
Misao: Aww man…
Aoshi: …
"Ok peoples, since this is a popular show, the break lasts for 15 minutes. So do whatever you want until then. Anyone want a snack?" goes off in search for food
Sano: 15 minutes huh? That's enough time…
Megumi: (playfully) Sano!
The next 15 minutes were not very exciting, and mainly consisted of talking, kissing, and Yahiko barfing. So we will skip the barney commercial and go back to the show.
"Hiya, and welcome back to Anime Amore! For a special treat before we get back to pairing up the characters, we will visit a previously Anime Amored couple to see how their relationship is turning out. Channel 872 please!"
Suddenly, a giant big-screen platinum tv flips on to channel 872; it shows a picture of hell
Everyone from Rurouni Kenshin: SHISHIO AND YUMI!
Shishio: Hello Battousai, Zanza, Shinomori. I trust you remember our little duel?
Kenshin: Shishio…eyes start to turn amber how did you survive?
Yumi: We didn't. Channel 872 is the hell channel. After Shishio-sama died, he took over hell and now we rule it. Almost like ruling Japan except hotter. And full of dead people.
"Riiiiiiiiiight…anyway, how's your relationship doing?"
Yumi: Oh, it's great! We've had some intense times since we have nothing else to do…it's wonderful! I'm all alone with my Shishio-sama…except for Hojo (a/n sp? Someone tell me his name!), but he's nothing.
Hojo: HEY!
Shishio: Well, we've got to go now. We have some lost souls we need to torture, then we might have a little fun…good day.
The tv flips off and everyone breaths a sigh of relief
Sano: He's much creepier dead than alive.
Megumi: Generally that's the way things work.
"Okay then people, on to the couples…the next one is…"
Misao: (biting nails) Come on, come on! Aoshi-sama! Aoshi-sama!
"…The junior couple, Yahiko and Tsubame!"
Misao: Drat.
Aoshi: …
Sano, Megumi, Kenshin, and Kaoru: Aww…
Yahiko: (blushing) Um…yeah…Tsubame…a-aishiteru.
Tsubame: (blushing too) Aishiteru Yahiko.
They kiss hesitantly but sweetly
Sano: (mocking Yahiko) Get a room!
Yahiko: Shut up ya tori-atama!
Sano: Hey punk! That wasn't nice!
Yahiko: What'd you call me!
Yahiko gnaws on Sano's head, everyone sweatdropping
Kaoru: Hey!
Kenshin: What?
Kaoru: How come Yahiko got his first kiss when he's eleven, and I got mine when I was nineteen?
Kenshin: Want another?
Kaoru: Yeah!
Kenshin and Kaoru kiss again, sweetly
Everyone: Awwww
"Well, looks like I'm down to the last couple of the night. They are…"
Misao: Oh please pleeeeeeeeeeeease!
Aoshi: …
"…Last but not least (well maybe), Misao and Aoshi!
Misao: YES!
Aoshi: ……Aishiteru Misao. I'm sorry that I hurt you when I left, but I promise never to hurt you again. And I know I'm not the best at expressing this, but…aishiteru.
Misao: Aoshi! Aishiteru! I don't care if you hurt me! You thought it was for the best and it's all in the past anyway. Aishiteru!
Misao and Aoshi (10 points if you can guess what they do!) kiss (good job! 10 points!) sweetly, Aoshi bending way down
Everyone: How sweet!
Yahiko: Are there no rooms in this place!
"Well everyone, mission accomplished! You now all love each other, so I'll take you back to Japan now. Thanks so much for coming!"
Kenshin: Thank you so much, Kitty-dono.
Kaoru: Yes, thank you! We'll always be grateful!
Everyone else: Thanks! (well, not Aoshi)
"Sayonara everyone! Have a good life!"
Everyone except Aoshi: You too! Take care!
The whole Rurouni Kenshin group waves a final goodbye, all the couples holding hands. I snap my fingers as I wave goodbye, and they are gone from this world forever. …Well, at least until I get bored…
So? How was it? I hope everyone liked it and I would appreciate any and all reviews! And if I get a lot of reviews, I might think about adding more chapters. If I did another episode, I think I would do Inuyasha.
Faint kissing noises can be heard from the background, along with several moans
0o I'd better go check that out…sweatdrop…I hope it isn't anything too serious…for cryin' out loud, they're not even married! Oh well. R&R please! Sayonara!