Notes: 2nd fic, 1st attempt at a comedy fic. R&R (except God of Angst)
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WIB
Wizards in Black
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Chapter I:
SATURDAY 6 P.M. HOGWARTS, GREAT LAKE
It was a hot summers eve, many students had just gotten back from Hogsmeade and Harry, Ron and Hermione were lying on the grass by the lake eating candy they had bought at Honeydukes. "I can't believe it!" Hermione was complaining, "to think that Dumbledore has declared this week wand-free!" Ron was throwing stones at the giant squid and just grunted. "Come on Hermione, its not THAT bad!" Harry said "Oh no! We've forgotten to turn in our wands!" Ron yelled. So they began fumbling through their robes to find them. "I haven't got mine!" Harry said "Must've lost it at Hogsmeade!" "Me to!" Ron added "So have I!" Hermione said sounding very urgent. "Doesn't matter anyway." Harry said looking at his watch ".they've already locked the wands in the safe" so all three walked back up to the castle and went to bed.
SATURDAY 10 P.M. HOGWARTS
Harry kept looking at where he was going and the Marauder's map to make sure no one was going to find him. Harry was on his way to fetch his, Ron's and Hermione's wands back from Hogsmeade. Soon he had made it past the one-eyed witch and was safely on his way to the Honeydukes cellar.
SATURDAY 10:30 P.M. HOGSMEADE
It didn't take long before Harry was at the entrance to the Honeydukes cellar. He opened the door slowly, checked that the coast was clear and walked out into the enormous room. Suddenly he heard voices coming, and dived behind an enormous crate of chocolate. "Hey Maggie! Come and give me a hand with these Cockroaches!" One voice said as its owner stepped into the basement. "What, the ones for the Cockroach Clusters?" another replied "Yes the ones for the Clusters what else, you moron!" the first voice shouted again. The other person (Maggie) stepped into the basement "There you are! Now give me a hand with this crate!" the first voice said, there were more footsteps and a sudden sneeze. "Oh fibsquabble! Now we'll have to fetch some new ones!" the second voice said "Nah.no one will be able to taste the difference" the first voice said and they carried the crate out of the basement. When the voices had vanished completely, Harry snuck out of the cellar, and out onto the streets. How he'd gotten the wands, and made it back to the castle unseen he didn't know, but now he was safe and sound in his bed sleeping.
SUNDAY 6:30 A.M. HOGWARTS, GRYFFINDOR common room
After breakfast Harry and Ron were having a game of wizards chess, when Hermione interrupted them: "Hey! Come and look!" she said. They stood up and walked over to the window Hermione was looking out of, "What?" Ron asked "Look!" Hermione answered and pointed at a little beige figure swimming in the lake. "Oh my god!" Ron exclaimed "That's Malfoy!" and he started pointing "You're right!" Harry said staring at the little figure. "Why don't we go down and curse him or something!?" Ron suggested "Yeah! That sounds cool!" Harry agreed, so they set of for the lake, Hermione following them, desperately trying to stop them.
SUNDAY 6:40 A.M HOGWARTS, THE GREAT LAKE
"Okay, but if you must curse him, at least don't get caught. Curse him from those bushes over there" Hermione said and pointed as the came closer to the lake. "Great idea Hermione!" Ron exclaimed, and started a run towards the bushes "C'mon, before he sees us!" thinking it a quite logic idea, Harry and Hermione also started a run. All three had managed to get behind the bush unseen, and even had a very good field of vision over the target. "How about an engorgement charm?" Harry suggested. "Yeah, that could be fun.especially if you hit in the behind! He'd sink because of his gigantic ass!" Ron said, falling on his back laughing. Harry widened a hole in the bush, just enough to see Malfoy put his wand through it and said: "Engorgio!" A burst of bright blue light shot out of Harry's wand speeding towards Malfoy. Unfortunately it missed him by a few inches; Harry tried again but missed him again. "Let me!" Ron said, pushing Harry aside. He pushed his wand aggressively through the hole and shouted "Engorgio! Engorgio! Engorgio!" and three bursts of bright blue light shot at Malfoy missing him by a few inches. Malfoy had probably seen one of the flashes because he started to look very scared and began swimming, as fast as he could towards shore. Suddenly a huge tentacle, the size of the Womping Willow at least, grabbed Malfoy's ankle and pulled him under. "What the?!" Harry yelled and ran towards the lake.
"You'll have to go in after him!!" Hermione screamed looking so terrified you'd think it was a loved one.could it be.? "Why us?!" Ron shouted angrily, pulling his shoes off. "Well.uhm.because I.I.I can't swim, yeah that's it.I can't swim!" Hermione answered coughing very indiscrete. "Yeah sure, whatever" Harry said and dived into the lake, Ron following.
Suddenly, Hermione saw Harry and Ron flying out of the lake and into a large patch of rose bushes. She hurried over to the bushes, and found Harry and Ron sprawled in the bushes, moaning something about a giant.SQUID! At that exact moment, she saw the giant squid coming out of the water, at least 20 times larger then normal. In one of its at least five hundred tentacles was Malfoy, little, pink and unconscious, as far as Hermione could see. The squid was moving at towards the castle, and fast.
Ten minutes later, the squid had taken over the castle, everyone had been captured, nobody had gotten into the safe where the wands were, some places you could even see tentacles sprouting out of the windows.
When Harry and Ron "woke up" they saw Hermione staring up at the fortified castle. "Did we do this?" Harry asked gaping at the castle. "Yes, you did." Hermione answered facing away from Harry and Ron "And we'll have to do something about it" she continued. "Yeah, but what?" Ron asked also staring at the castle. "We'll be the WIB- Wizards in Black" Hermione said, still not turning around "But first.Let's put it on" she went on. "Put what on?" Harry asked, looking at Hermione. "Put you're robes on, you are standing butt naked!" Hermione said giggling. That's when Harry and Ron looked down there fronts, and saw that they hadn't got anything on. "Oh shit!" Harry exclaimed, Ron stayed silent but went bright pink. "You're robes are over there" Hermione said and pointed, giggling even more.
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WIB
Wizards in Black
----------------------------------
Chapter I:
SATURDAY 6 P.M. HOGWARTS, GREAT LAKE
It was a hot summers eve, many students had just gotten back from Hogsmeade and Harry, Ron and Hermione were lying on the grass by the lake eating candy they had bought at Honeydukes. "I can't believe it!" Hermione was complaining, "to think that Dumbledore has declared this week wand-free!" Ron was throwing stones at the giant squid and just grunted. "Come on Hermione, its not THAT bad!" Harry said "Oh no! We've forgotten to turn in our wands!" Ron yelled. So they began fumbling through their robes to find them. "I haven't got mine!" Harry said "Must've lost it at Hogsmeade!" "Me to!" Ron added "So have I!" Hermione said sounding very urgent. "Doesn't matter anyway." Harry said looking at his watch ".they've already locked the wands in the safe" so all three walked back up to the castle and went to bed.
SATURDAY 10 P.M. HOGWARTS
Harry kept looking at where he was going and the Marauder's map to make sure no one was going to find him. Harry was on his way to fetch his, Ron's and Hermione's wands back from Hogsmeade. Soon he had made it past the one-eyed witch and was safely on his way to the Honeydukes cellar.
SATURDAY 10:30 P.M. HOGSMEADE
It didn't take long before Harry was at the entrance to the Honeydukes cellar. He opened the door slowly, checked that the coast was clear and walked out into the enormous room. Suddenly he heard voices coming, and dived behind an enormous crate of chocolate. "Hey Maggie! Come and give me a hand with these Cockroaches!" One voice said as its owner stepped into the basement. "What, the ones for the Cockroach Clusters?" another replied "Yes the ones for the Clusters what else, you moron!" the first voice shouted again. The other person (Maggie) stepped into the basement "There you are! Now give me a hand with this crate!" the first voice said, there were more footsteps and a sudden sneeze. "Oh fibsquabble! Now we'll have to fetch some new ones!" the second voice said "Nah.no one will be able to taste the difference" the first voice said and they carried the crate out of the basement. When the voices had vanished completely, Harry snuck out of the cellar, and out onto the streets. How he'd gotten the wands, and made it back to the castle unseen he didn't know, but now he was safe and sound in his bed sleeping.
SUNDAY 6:30 A.M. HOGWARTS, GRYFFINDOR common room
After breakfast Harry and Ron were having a game of wizards chess, when Hermione interrupted them: "Hey! Come and look!" she said. They stood up and walked over to the window Hermione was looking out of, "What?" Ron asked "Look!" Hermione answered and pointed at a little beige figure swimming in the lake. "Oh my god!" Ron exclaimed "That's Malfoy!" and he started pointing "You're right!" Harry said staring at the little figure. "Why don't we go down and curse him or something!?" Ron suggested "Yeah! That sounds cool!" Harry agreed, so they set of for the lake, Hermione following them, desperately trying to stop them.
SUNDAY 6:40 A.M HOGWARTS, THE GREAT LAKE
"Okay, but if you must curse him, at least don't get caught. Curse him from those bushes over there" Hermione said and pointed as the came closer to the lake. "Great idea Hermione!" Ron exclaimed, and started a run towards the bushes "C'mon, before he sees us!" thinking it a quite logic idea, Harry and Hermione also started a run. All three had managed to get behind the bush unseen, and even had a very good field of vision over the target. "How about an engorgement charm?" Harry suggested. "Yeah, that could be fun.especially if you hit in the behind! He'd sink because of his gigantic ass!" Ron said, falling on his back laughing. Harry widened a hole in the bush, just enough to see Malfoy put his wand through it and said: "Engorgio!" A burst of bright blue light shot out of Harry's wand speeding towards Malfoy. Unfortunately it missed him by a few inches; Harry tried again but missed him again. "Let me!" Ron said, pushing Harry aside. He pushed his wand aggressively through the hole and shouted "Engorgio! Engorgio! Engorgio!" and three bursts of bright blue light shot at Malfoy missing him by a few inches. Malfoy had probably seen one of the flashes because he started to look very scared and began swimming, as fast as he could towards shore. Suddenly a huge tentacle, the size of the Womping Willow at least, grabbed Malfoy's ankle and pulled him under. "What the?!" Harry yelled and ran towards the lake.
"You'll have to go in after him!!" Hermione screamed looking so terrified you'd think it was a loved one.could it be.? "Why us?!" Ron shouted angrily, pulling his shoes off. "Well.uhm.because I.I.I can't swim, yeah that's it.I can't swim!" Hermione answered coughing very indiscrete. "Yeah sure, whatever" Harry said and dived into the lake, Ron following.
Suddenly, Hermione saw Harry and Ron flying out of the lake and into a large patch of rose bushes. She hurried over to the bushes, and found Harry and Ron sprawled in the bushes, moaning something about a giant.SQUID! At that exact moment, she saw the giant squid coming out of the water, at least 20 times larger then normal. In one of its at least five hundred tentacles was Malfoy, little, pink and unconscious, as far as Hermione could see. The squid was moving at towards the castle, and fast.
Ten minutes later, the squid had taken over the castle, everyone had been captured, nobody had gotten into the safe where the wands were, some places you could even see tentacles sprouting out of the windows.
When Harry and Ron "woke up" they saw Hermione staring up at the fortified castle. "Did we do this?" Harry asked gaping at the castle. "Yes, you did." Hermione answered facing away from Harry and Ron "And we'll have to do something about it" she continued. "Yeah, but what?" Ron asked also staring at the castle. "We'll be the WIB- Wizards in Black" Hermione said, still not turning around "But first.Let's put it on" she went on. "Put what on?" Harry asked, looking at Hermione. "Put you're robes on, you are standing butt naked!" Hermione said giggling. That's when Harry and Ron looked down there fronts, and saw that they hadn't got anything on. "Oh shit!" Harry exclaimed, Ron stayed silent but went bright pink. "You're robes are over there" Hermione said and pointed, giggling even more.