A/N- Well, this song has been stuck in my head all day, so I just HAD to write a story about it. This is the first time my CJ and Jay muses have whacked me in the head lately. The song just drove me nuts being stuck in my head all day so I wrote this. Hope you like!
Disclaimer: I own no one. The title belongs to Smackdown! Records since it is from the 'Origionals' cd. See ... I own nothing ... *~wink ~* Aslo, this is ALL slashy (unlikely, I know), so if you don't like it, don't read it.
Paul - Triple H
Layfield - Bradshaw
Ron - Ron Simmons
Shawn - HBK
Scotty - Scott Steiner
Dave - Batista
~~
Don't You Wish You Were Me?
~~
"Chris, you gotta do it!"
Chris Jericho turned to his fellow blonde Canadian. He rolled his eyes lightly. "Why do you want to play a drinking game anyways?"
"Please, Chris? I'll find more people to play, please??"
Chris rolled his eyes again and sighed. "Fine. But if this is just some way for you to dare me into your pants, then I swear, I'll break the most important thing in your life."
"Yeah, yeah." Jay replied, getting up from his seat at their table.
He returned a few minutes later with Shawn, Paul LeVesque, Scotty Steiner, and The APA. Everyone knows you can't have a drinking game without the APA!
"A'right, then, what're we all pansyin' around here for? What're we playin'?" Layfield said, sitting at the table backwards on his chair. Both he and Ron had cigars between their teeth and beers in their mouths.
"You guys ever play Truth or Dare?" Jay asked, sitting down again.
"Truth 'R' Dare? You're shittin' me, right?" Ron asked, "Shit ... this kid must already be drunk."
"No, please, hear me out! It'll be fun! We can really get to know each other!"
"Know each other." Layfield laughed.
"Come on. Y'know, unless you're scared we'd find out something you don't want us to know about ..." Jay said innocently, trailing off.
"Shit, we're in."
Each of the seven men put twenty bucks in the middle of the table to pay for any drinks they would need to buy or use to pay someone to do something.
"Good, I'll start." Chris said, sitting closer to the table.
"I don't think, so, kid, I'm first." Layfield cut in.
"Right, like I said, Layfield starts."
"Okay. Uh ... Scotty." Layfield said after scanning the room.
"Truth I guess."
"Who was the last person you had sex with?"
Big Poppa blushed an intimate shade of red beneath his dark sunglasses and he readjusted his chain headset, eyes diverted to the floor or table top.
"Come on, Booty Daddy. Gotts live up to your reputation some how!" Shawn joked.
"Fine ... can I switch to dare?"
"No."
Scott sighed.
"Jeez, I never thought you were such a wuss, Steiner." Paul smirked, knowing it'd get on Scotty's nerve.
"Fine DAMMIT! It was Dave." Scott nearly yelled, slamming down his shot os whiskey.
The group laughed. It was always known that Scotty had a little crush on the Deacon.
"Fine, now it's my turn." Scott said, "Jay."
"Dare."
"Four straight shots of bourbon."
"You know I hate bourbon!" Jay whined.
"Well, you know, if you're scared ...."
Jay glared at the natural brunette and quickly downed the four shots of bourbon that Layfield sat in front of him. He hated that taste.
"Fine, my turn. Paul."
"Truth."
"How many?"
"How many what?" Paul asked, setting back slightly.
"Lovers, idiot."
"Um ... four." Paul said quickly, downing his drink.
Layfield and Ron both snorted in their drinks.
"Yeah right. We all know you're the company slut." Layfield coughed.
"No, that would be Shawn." Paul replied, coolly.
Shawn quickly elbowed him in the ribs.
"Then, Shawn, how many guys have YOU slept with?" Paul asked.
"What if I was going to pick dare?" Shawn smirked.
"It's either way. No matter what you'd pick, I would ask."
"But that was a question!"
"FIne, I dare you to say how many lovers you've had."
"Why are y'all so interested in each others sex lives, anyways?" Chris asked.
"It's interesting, dammit." Ron replied.
"Hey, I'm not complaining. But if this turns into a circle-jerk, I'm outta here."
"Alright, enough of this Truth or Dare shit. Who's all of y'alls best lover?" Layfield finally said when no one was saying anything and slamming his beer on the table.
"That's easy, you." Ron replied.
"Well, that was obvious." Jay rolled his eyes, "Mine would be .... Adam. Definately."
"Ron." Layfield said.
"Um ... Nash." Paul said.
"Paul." Shawn replied.
"Scott Hall." Scotty added.
"Hey, you ain't said nothing, pumpkin." Layfield said to Chris.
Chris was smirking wildly, laughing a bit at everyone else.
"Man, y'all got the good guys, but mine's still better." Chris smiled.
"Really." Shawn smirked.
"Yeah. Not only did I beat all of you guys out, I've beaten you out of your own title."
"What? Heartbreak Kid? I don't think so."
"No. You guys could name ANYONE y'all think are cute and are gay or bi, and I bet I've slept with all of them."
"You sure sound confident." Layfield said.
"Are you denying it?" Chris asked cockily.
Layfield rolled his eyes and shook his head lightly, "Fine. Um, Hurricane."
"Last year."
"Moore."
"Kids a twink. What can I say?"
"Szatkowski." Paul asked.
"Done."
"Nash."
"Yeah."
"Gunn." Scotty asked.
"Yeah."
"Gerin."
"Not gay."
"Hall." Shawn rattled.
"Are you kidding? Even that guy is almost a twink! I bet you everyone's been with him!"
"The Hardys." Jay asked. He knew his friend better than anyone, but Chris wasn't normally one to talk about his sexual life. It was probably the numerous drinks he had downed.
"Seperate or together?" Chris laughed.
"Damn boy. You are a slut." Layfield snickered.
Chris sighed, "Well, what can I say? They didn't write me the song 'Don't You Wish You Were Me' for nothing!"
{FIN}
Disclaimer: I own no one. The title belongs to Smackdown! Records since it is from the 'Origionals' cd. See ... I own nothing ... *~wink ~* Aslo, this is ALL slashy (unlikely, I know), so if you don't like it, don't read it.
Paul - Triple H
Layfield - Bradshaw
Ron - Ron Simmons
Shawn - HBK
Scotty - Scott Steiner
Dave - Batista
~~
Don't You Wish You Were Me?
~~
"Chris, you gotta do it!"
Chris Jericho turned to his fellow blonde Canadian. He rolled his eyes lightly. "Why do you want to play a drinking game anyways?"
"Please, Chris? I'll find more people to play, please??"
Chris rolled his eyes again and sighed. "Fine. But if this is just some way for you to dare me into your pants, then I swear, I'll break the most important thing in your life."
"Yeah, yeah." Jay replied, getting up from his seat at their table.
He returned a few minutes later with Shawn, Paul LeVesque, Scotty Steiner, and The APA. Everyone knows you can't have a drinking game without the APA!
"A'right, then, what're we all pansyin' around here for? What're we playin'?" Layfield said, sitting at the table backwards on his chair. Both he and Ron had cigars between their teeth and beers in their mouths.
"You guys ever play Truth or Dare?" Jay asked, sitting down again.
"Truth 'R' Dare? You're shittin' me, right?" Ron asked, "Shit ... this kid must already be drunk."
"No, please, hear me out! It'll be fun! We can really get to know each other!"
"Know each other." Layfield laughed.
"Come on. Y'know, unless you're scared we'd find out something you don't want us to know about ..." Jay said innocently, trailing off.
"Shit, we're in."
Each of the seven men put twenty bucks in the middle of the table to pay for any drinks they would need to buy or use to pay someone to do something.
"Good, I'll start." Chris said, sitting closer to the table.
"I don't think, so, kid, I'm first." Layfield cut in.
"Right, like I said, Layfield starts."
"Okay. Uh ... Scotty." Layfield said after scanning the room.
"Truth I guess."
"Who was the last person you had sex with?"
Big Poppa blushed an intimate shade of red beneath his dark sunglasses and he readjusted his chain headset, eyes diverted to the floor or table top.
"Come on, Booty Daddy. Gotts live up to your reputation some how!" Shawn joked.
"Fine ... can I switch to dare?"
"No."
Scott sighed.
"Jeez, I never thought you were such a wuss, Steiner." Paul smirked, knowing it'd get on Scotty's nerve.
"Fine DAMMIT! It was Dave." Scott nearly yelled, slamming down his shot os whiskey.
The group laughed. It was always known that Scotty had a little crush on the Deacon.
"Fine, now it's my turn." Scott said, "Jay."
"Dare."
"Four straight shots of bourbon."
"You know I hate bourbon!" Jay whined.
"Well, you know, if you're scared ...."
Jay glared at the natural brunette and quickly downed the four shots of bourbon that Layfield sat in front of him. He hated that taste.
"Fine, my turn. Paul."
"Truth."
"How many?"
"How many what?" Paul asked, setting back slightly.
"Lovers, idiot."
"Um ... four." Paul said quickly, downing his drink.
Layfield and Ron both snorted in their drinks.
"Yeah right. We all know you're the company slut." Layfield coughed.
"No, that would be Shawn." Paul replied, coolly.
Shawn quickly elbowed him in the ribs.
"Then, Shawn, how many guys have YOU slept with?" Paul asked.
"What if I was going to pick dare?" Shawn smirked.
"It's either way. No matter what you'd pick, I would ask."
"But that was a question!"
"FIne, I dare you to say how many lovers you've had."
"Why are y'all so interested in each others sex lives, anyways?" Chris asked.
"It's interesting, dammit." Ron replied.
"Hey, I'm not complaining. But if this turns into a circle-jerk, I'm outta here."
"Alright, enough of this Truth or Dare shit. Who's all of y'alls best lover?" Layfield finally said when no one was saying anything and slamming his beer on the table.
"That's easy, you." Ron replied.
"Well, that was obvious." Jay rolled his eyes, "Mine would be .... Adam. Definately."
"Ron." Layfield said.
"Um ... Nash." Paul said.
"Paul." Shawn replied.
"Scott Hall." Scotty added.
"Hey, you ain't said nothing, pumpkin." Layfield said to Chris.
Chris was smirking wildly, laughing a bit at everyone else.
"Man, y'all got the good guys, but mine's still better." Chris smiled.
"Really." Shawn smirked.
"Yeah. Not only did I beat all of you guys out, I've beaten you out of your own title."
"What? Heartbreak Kid? I don't think so."
"No. You guys could name ANYONE y'all think are cute and are gay or bi, and I bet I've slept with all of them."
"You sure sound confident." Layfield said.
"Are you denying it?" Chris asked cockily.
Layfield rolled his eyes and shook his head lightly, "Fine. Um, Hurricane."
"Last year."
"Moore."
"Kids a twink. What can I say?"
"Szatkowski." Paul asked.
"Done."
"Nash."
"Yeah."
"Gunn." Scotty asked.
"Yeah."
"Gerin."
"Not gay."
"Hall." Shawn rattled.
"Are you kidding? Even that guy is almost a twink! I bet you everyone's been with him!"
"The Hardys." Jay asked. He knew his friend better than anyone, but Chris wasn't normally one to talk about his sexual life. It was probably the numerous drinks he had downed.
"Seperate or together?" Chris laughed.
"Damn boy. You are a slut." Layfield snickered.
Chris sighed, "Well, what can I say? They didn't write me the song 'Don't You Wish You Were Me' for nothing!"
{FIN}