Disclaimer: I don't claim anyone you recognize. This is a work of fiction so don't sue me.
Summary: "Listen, testing clean, being on time and at every check-in, holding down a steady job, acquiring a car and an apartment, no matter how shitty they are, all the while caring for a narcissist with a two year old. You should give yourself some more credit, Dean." Dean/Seth One Shot.
And Baby We're Everything But Perfect
r u ok?
Sent: 7:45am
yes? no? maybe so?
Sent: 7:50am
i kno ur reading these seth
Sent: 7:57am
it's been 2 days
Sent: 8:01am
a fuck off. anything...
Sent: 8:10am
fine. is mia ok?
Sent: 8:13
FUCK OFF!
Received: 8: 16am
Mia's fine.
Received: 8:18am
Attached was a picture of the little girl in question. She was wrapped up in her favorite blanket with a purple binky hanging from her mouth. Her thick dark curls were piled on top of her head in a bun.
u know i hate when you do this
Sent: 8:23am
espically with her
Sent: 8:25am
i'll call cps
Sent: 8:28am
FUCK YOU!
Received: 8:30am
i'll see you later
Sent: 8:33am
I fucking HATE you!
Received: 8:35am
He pocketed his phone, ignoring the constant buzzing against his thigh.
"You came back clean."
"Surprised?"
"No."
A short silence passed before the large man behind the metal desk asked, "How does it feel?"
"How does what feel?"
"Being clean for a hundred and four days?"
The strawberry blonde shrugged. "Doesn't feel like anything really."
"You should give yourself more credit, Dean. I see you pushing yourself."
"Whoop-Dee-Doo! I haven't had the urge to stick a needle in my arm or anywhere else for that matter. My old man would be proud, who knows if that fucker is even alive, though."
"Why do you do that? Why do you enjoy putting yourself down so much?"
"Well excuse me for not wanting to throw myself a fucking party for not being a hype for a hundred plus days, G.I. Joe."
"He left again?"
Dean shifted in his seat, eyes flicking down to his worn work boots.
"Listen," Dean eyes shifted, meeting the sincere gaze of light gray ones. "I don't know if you're aware or not, though, I'm confident that you are, but what you're doing is amazing. Not just for yourself, but Seth and that little girl."
Dean subconsciously grabs for his phone.
"You don't have to tell me if it is or it isn't. Your progress is still great either way. Now, what I don't want to happen is for all your work to have been for nothing. At the end of the day your responsibility is to yourself. In the seven years that I've known you this is the most on point you've been."
"Really now?"
The sarcasm wasn't lost on either of them.
"Listen, testing clean, being on time and at every check-in, holding down a steady job, acquiring a car and an apartment, no matter how shitty they are, all while caring for a narcissist with a two year old. You should give yourself some more credit, Dean."
Dean picked at the dead skin around his thumb. He couldn't help it when it came to Seth, he never could, and whatever it was only got stronger when Mia came into the picture.
"So what do you propose I do, G.I. Joe?"
Work was work. A back breaking job Dean could let the smallest part of himself admit he liked, a 401K and health benifits.
Gone were the days when he stole copper just so he could eat.
A shrill bell rang, signalling the end of his shift. Dean shut down his station before pulling the protective glasses he wore from his face and hard hat off his head. He clocked out, gathered his things and hurried to the parking lot towards his green, 1998 Ford F150 Raptor.
Once inside, Dean pulled his phone from his pocket, he hadn't checked it since leaving the parole office, but he wasn't surprised to find his inbox and voicemail filled with nasty messages from Seth. He tossed the device into the seat next to him before pulling out of the parking lot.
It was a short commute, almost too short for Dean on this day so he drove past his apartment complex to the convenience store three blocks down.
He grabbed himself a six pack of no-name beer, a bag of barbecue potato chips and some gummy bears for Mia.
Anxiety flooded his body as he walked towards the end of the hallway where his apartment was located. His hold on the brown paper bag tightened as he fished through his jacket pocket for his keys.
Once found, he calmed himself by taking slow, deep breaths. He'd never been nervous about confronting Seth before and that's how he knew this time was different and this time he was serious.
Routinely after Seth had disappeared with Mia and Dean had coaxed him back, Seth did this thing where he cleaned the apartment from top to bottom (even when it didn't need cleaning) and had dinner on the stove. His nostrils were attacked by the strong scent of pine followed by his legs being wrapped up by a squealing two year old.
Dean lifted the little girl and smothered her face with kisses, inhaling the sweet bubble gum scent of her hair.
"I missed you my Mia," He said as he walked with her into the small kitchen. Seth was standing over the stoves frying what looked like chicken.
"Missed you!" The toddler said enthusiastically.
Dean set the brown paper bag on the counter, pulling out the beer and transferring it to the refrigerator. He leaned against the counter with Mia, who had popped her binky in her mouth, cuddled against his chest. He kissed the top of her head before acknowledging Seth with a greeting.
"Dinners almost done, the house is clean and I washed and ironed all your work shirts like the good little wife I am."
Dean would usually reply with a smart remark of his own, they'd get into a shouting match, Mia would start crying, Seth would threaten to leave again and Dean would just give up. Telling him not to take Mia because of how late it was or that Seth's right and that he's just jealous (which is a lie because Randy fucking Orton is a piece of shit douche-bag and Dean would die if he was ever jealous of someone like him).
Instead he tells Seth to call him when dinner's ready and leaves to the living room with Mia in his arms.
Dinner was quiet for the most part. Mia babbled every now and then between spoons of corn and mashed potatoes.
Seth cleaned while Dean got Mia ready for bed. Seth was good for that, letting him have quality, alone time with the toddler.
However, once he was back in the living room, Seth was sat on the worn, black leather couch with his arms folded across his chest. He was ready. But so was Dean.
"I don't want to keep doing this."
"Neither do I, but you can't keep your nose out of business that doesn't belong to you."
"This isn't because I want to be in your business, Seth." Dean tells him. "This is about me caring about you and Mia."
"Stop using her as an excuse."
"I'm not, I care abo - "
"What you care about," Seth says, cutting Dean off. "Is keeping me to yourself, we're not together, Dean, we never were."
"This is not about us being together or me wanting you, this is about you being a stupid fuck and running to that abusive asshole every time he calls. He doesn't love you, Seth."
"And you do?" Seth question hotly. "Say it, you love me, and it kills you that I don't love you back. That I don't want you or need you they way I do him."
By now Seth was pacing back and forth in front of the patio door with his arms wrapped around himself. Dean stayed seated in his recliner, elbows on his knees with his head in his hands.
"He doesn't love you, Seth. He never has and he never will." Dean leaned back in his seat, arms resting on the armrest. "And if you want to chase behind that abusive fuck, fine, just don't drag Mia with you."
Seth shook his head before running a hand through his loose hair. A chuckle escaped his lips as he turned towards Dean. He surveyed the older man, a smug smile spreading across his face.
"You want to talk about abuse, Dean?" He asked tauntingly. "Does the name Renee ring a bell?"
"It's not the same." Dean hissed.
"I recall you getting very, very rough with her."
"It was once! Once, Seth and you know it. I've apologized since then and we've both moved on." Dean was standing now, willing himslef to stay where he was, keeping his voice low. "Unlike Randy, I don't manipulate my victim into coming back."
"Fuck you and what you think you know." Seth snarled.
"I don't think, I know, Seth. And so does Mia."
Seth moved toward Dean quickly and slapped him right across the face.
"Don't fucking use her against me!" He yelled.
Dean rubbed a hand against his jaw, squaring his shoulders.
"She told me how the "mean man" hit daddy. How the "stinky" smoke makes her eyes hurt. These are words from your daughter's mouth, Seth. I'm not making this up. You drag her out of this house in the middle of the night so you can go off with him to some five star hotel and shack up for a few days."
"He doesn't smoke around her anymore." Seth says quietly.
"Oh well isn't that sweet," Dean mocks. "What about hitting you, does he not do that around her either?"
Both men were breathing hard, stood face to face and unmoving.
"How does it make you feel to know that you're only worthy of a ride in his Bentley and a stay at some five star hotel. Have you ever been to his house, Seth?" Dean asks, but he doesn't wait for an answer. "Oh, wait, of course not. His wife is there, along with their three kids."
Dean had noticed Seth's eyes start to water long ago.
"When are you going to wake up, Seth?" Dean asked, his tone softer then it had been before. "If not for yourself, then, Mia."
Seth let out a shaky breath. "You think," Seth starts slowly, tears finally falling from his large, brown eyes. "You of all people have the right to tell me who I should be with and how I should raise my daughter? Is it really real this time, Dean? You're really gonna be clean? Are you sure I'm not gonna find you in some park somewhere gone out of your mind?" Seth chuckled but there was no humor behind it. "That's rich. So, let me get this straight, you won't blow our rent money on herion and one of the broads on 34th street? Am I hearing this right?"
"Yeah," Dean choked out.
"Yeah," Seth wonders. "'Cause when you do, I go to him and he gives me money to pay our fucking rent, to buy food, put gas in that piece of shit you drive! My time is ticking at Second City, I can't continue to dance there, Dean, Moe's hiring hot, young guys left and right. How else am I suspose to make sure we survive?"
"I've been clean for three months!"
"Months! Not years, Dean!" He clarifies. "And you worry about what Mia sees with I'm with Randy, what about what she sees around you!"
"And that's why I've been clean, Seth! Because I know!" Dean chokes back a sob and pulls at his hair. "I know what it's like to be left, to be put before a man and a needle and Mia deserves more then that! I never want her to see me the way I seen my mom. Ever! I had to put the needle down. But if I fail, all she'll have is you! Leighla's not here anymore, Seth, she's gone!"
Dean moves away so he can breathe while Seth sobs behind him.
"And if all Mia has left is you," Dean says with a watery voice. "She deserves the best you."
Months Later...
"I help?" Asked a little voice beside him.
"Yes, but we have to be extra quiet because it's a surprise."
The little body squirmed with excitement all while trying to contain her giggles. Dean bopped her nose before picking her up and setting her on the counter.
"Okay, my Mia, today is daddy's first day of class and we have to make sure he's well nourished so he can learn and get good grades, yeah?" The almost three year old nodded her head, causing her thick curls to fall all around her face.
They set about mixing pancake batter, Dean allowing her to add sprinkles because he couldn't resist those big brown eyes and dimples. Mushrooms, onions, and diced ham were all sauteed in some butter before being added to eggs. Mia insisted on making Seth a card. While she did that, Dean folded over the omelette and added cheese to the top.
"Smells good in here."
Mia squealed. "'Prise, daddy!"
Seth engulfed the little in a warm hug, planting kisses all over her face.
"Daddy!" She giggled loudly. "Card!" She said, holding out the take out menu she scribbled on.
"For me?" Seth asked, acting surprised. Mia nodded, showing off her small teeth. "It's wonderful. I love it so much, baby."
"School?"
Seth nodded. "Yeah, daddy's going back to school."
"I school?" Mia asked.
"No, not yet, love."
"Work?" She asked while pointing to Dean.
"Yeah, Dean's going to work and daddy's going to school. But we don't point, baby." Seth took her hand in his and nibbled at her finger playfully, causing the little girl to laugh.
Dean had started plating the food so Seth grabbed two glasses and Mia's sippy and filled them with orange juice. He took Mia and strapped her into her booster seat at the table before returning to the kitchen for their drinks.
"This was susposed to be a surprise you know." Said Dean as he cut up bite sized pieces of omelette for Mia.
"I am surprised. Who knew Mia could cook." Seth quipped.
Dean followed Seth to the table, plates in hand and a smile on his face.
"Three hundred and thirty four days is coming up." Seth said as he slid his biology book into his backpack. "And a certain someone's third birthday."
Mia head popped up, her all important iPad forgotten.
"Daddy, my birthday?" She asked excitedly, Seth nodded and she turned to Dean. "My birthday?" She asked again, just to make sure. Dean smiled. "Yup! My Mia's gonna be the big three!"
Mia squealed with excitement, quickly going back to her iPad as she sang "my birthday" over and over to herself.
"So what do you say, babe?" Seth asked, now packing Mia's diaper bag, Naomi, who lived a few blocks away, whose husband worked with Dean had agreed to watch Mia free of charge on the days Seth had class. She was wonderful and Mia loved her, Naomi was expecting a little one of her own and thought Mia was great practice.
"You know I don't really care to celebrate these "milestones" as you like to call it." Dean finished the last button on his work shirt and set down on the bed to pull on his boots. Placing a kiss to Mia's head first. "But if you plan something, I'm game. Surprise me."
Seth finished packing Mia's bag and moved to get the little girl dressed.
"Surprise you, huh?" Seth asked after getting the little girl dressed in a pink cotton dress, black leggings and brown boots.
"Yeah if that's what you want." Dean said running his fingers through Mia's curls, missing Seth's suggestive tone completely.
Seth sighed, too overcome with emotion to care.
"You love her so much."
Dean hummed, picking up the little girl and settling her on his hip. Seth slipped her iPad in her bag.
Dean came around the bed and wrapped his free arm around Seth's waist.
"I love her daddy, too."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." Dean said, placing a soft to Seth's lips.
"I love daddy, too!" Mia chirped, leaning over to kiss Seth's then Dean. "Love Dean."
Dean smiled, kissing Mia's nose. "Love my Mia."
Authors Note: Just trying to dust off the cobwebs. Review?
Xoxo Leslie