Disclaimer : I do not own Star Trek, nor do i make anything from this.

Warnings : Slash, Kirk/McCoy, nothing else i can think of.

Notes : Not beta's, please forgive the mistakes, will get it done.

Notes2 : Was done as a request for Stand_December on Livejournal, girl is epic :)

It should of stopped being a surprise months ago when the medical alert was called in for an away team. Bones should not of felt the lump in his throat or the mantra of "not Jim, please not Jim" in his head every time he rushed down to the transporter room. For when was it ever not Jim, the fearless Captain, who had somehow managed to get himself into trouble? Granted, more often than not it was in some attempt to protect the rest of the crew but Bone's didn't think that changed the point. He had learned long ago to detach himself emotionally from Jim when it came to medical, it would not do for their feelings towards each to distract from duty. So when the small alarm rang through his office and the voice of the First Officer drifted over the communications Bone's knew almost immediately that it was their Captain that was the one in trouble and he quelled the uneasiness by instinct.

It was routine by now. Collect supplies. Go down to the transporter room. Assess and attend to injuries that couldn't wait to the journey to the med bay. Comment on how stupid and reckless Jim was and maybe an eye roll for good measure. Bones swore his whole body turned to ice the day he walked into the room and realized that this was far from routine.

Jim's body had never looked so weak and devoid of energy, his skin seeming to of suddenly sunk against his bones. His skin was pale, completely devoid of colour. The usual cocky, but pain filled smile, didn't come as Bone's approached him. It was only then that he realised that Jim wasn't even conscious. This alone sent alarm bells ringing in his head. Jim's head was uncharacteristically being cradled on Spock's lap as the second in command knelt near the Captain. A voice in the back of Bone's head told him that something major must have happened for this odd behaviour to be occurring.

"What happened?" He demanded, hands moving deftly and purposely as they scanned over Jim's body, categorising his injuries.

"The negotiations did not go as planned." Spock replied, his voice devoid of emotion as always.

"No shit." Bone's muttered, gently pulling back Jim's eyelids to look at his eyes. Unresponsive to light, full blown pupils. "What did they to do him?"

"It seems that the intel provided on the species was incomplete. For the council to agree to talk to the Captain he was required to go through a screening, the purpose of to decide what type of person he truly was." Spock recited, eyes following the Doctors movements calculatingly.

"Type of person?" Bones' frowned. "What does it matter?"

Bone's pressed his fingers to Jim's wrist, pulse much to slow and sluggish.

"In their own words, a man must be pure of heart and mind before he can be allowed to discuss with them. Something similar in theory to a mind meld was performed, presumably to explore the reality for themselves."

Bones cursed under his breath. "And he agreed to this!" Typical Jim, look before leaping.

"The Captain was adamant that he would do whatever required to complete the mission ."

Something told Bones that Spock had not agreed with Jim's course of action in the slightest. The nervousness in Bones' stomach seemed to increase as the information sunk in, the mere idea of someone invading Jim's mind infuriating to him.

"Then what?" Bones pressed through gritted teeth, scanning the area near Jim's skull to see just what exactly the encounter had done to him.

"The Captain collapsed immediately after the link was ceased and we were ordered to leave. They refused to have negotiations with us."

"What? Why?" Jim may be a lot of things but Bones' knew, he knew that Jim was a good person on the inside.

"They were not forthcoming with what they saw. The only information I could pertain from them was that the Captain was apparently too troubled in mind to be an acceptable candidate."

Bones' swore it was a bloody good thing he wasn't on the planet when this had happened or punches would have been thrown. The mere thought of someone making judgements about Jim was ridiculous and insulting. He knew, he was maybe one of the few who did, amount the trauma on Jim's past. The fact that these people had used that as an excuse to dispel him was sickening.

"Let's get him to medical bay now." Bones' ordered, anger barely held in check.

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Bones sighed wearily as he dragged a hand through his hair, beyond the point of caring what more of a mess that he made it. The machines around him beeped steadily, the buzz of equipment a small drone in the background. It had been six days since Jim had come back from the plant unconscious, he had yet to wake up. Every scan since that Bone's had run showed the same thing. His pulse was slow but regular, his brain however was erratic, his brain waves moving all over the place. If Bones had to guess he would say Jim was having a nightmare, but nightmares didn't last days on end. There was no medical to reason why Jim was still unconscious, he should of woken hours after being brought in. Still, every drug he had tried had failed to rouse the Captain.

"Jim." Bones said softly, hand reaching to lightly take one of Jim's in his own like he had done many times in the last few days. "You got to wake up okay, the ships going crazy without you. I'm going crazy without you."

Jim didn't stir, not that he really expected him to. Bones pressed his mouth gently to Jim's forehead before standing, taking a shuddering breath. Nearly every minute had been spent next to the man's bedside and he was forced to admit that he needed to get out of here for a while. He was no use to the man tired and exhausted. He needed a shower, something to eat and some sleep.

"I'll figure this out Jim, I promise."

Jim lay motionless as Bones walked sadly from the room.

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It took another three days for Jim to stir. There was no one beside his side as his eyes moved beneath his sockets, no one there as his brow furrowed and his fingers itched on the sheet underneath him. He awoke with a gasp, his breath rushing out of him in panic as his mind was flung back into consciousness. Jim's eyes darted around frantically, tears pooling down his cheeks as his chest tightened, his whole body feeling trapped and confined. There was no one there in the room as he gazed around, desperately trying to find someone, anyone.

"Bones." His voice croaked as he tried to speak, barely more than a breath of air. Jim hardly felt as his tears seemed to grow heavier, soundless sobs escaping him.

"Bones." He whispered again, growing more and more distraught as his voice failed him. Hands shaking he clawed at the wires attached to him, pulling them, barely even feeling the sting as tubes disconnected from his skin. His whole felt numb as he kicked at the covers, all but falling from the bed as he tried to get up, to get away. His whole frame shook as he forced himself to his feet, leaning against any surface he could find as he tried to reach the door.

Scrambling against one of the bio beds, he whimpered as he fell, legs locking underneath him as he collapsed to a heap on the floor.

"Bones, Bones, Bones." He chanted brokenly, wondering why no one was there to help him.

Review please? More will be along soon :)