It was stupid. How the heck can something like this happen?
He should be a renowned celebrity right now. Feared by his enemies, and lusted after by a countless number of women—including his female enemies, of course. The guys could just envy him because of all the lust…
He shared the name of the greatest ninja village in the world, albeit it's older, original name. His grandfather was once the Hokage, and he himself had been tutored by the now current Hokage—the Rokudaime. In fact, he, Udon and Moegi…were known all over the world as the dreadedKitsune Corps of Konoha…
"Sensei!" His train of thought interrupted, the young man stumbled in his balance, and almost fell to the ground from his seat on a branch. He looked downwards to where the voice came from, and sighed upon seeing the three upset faces of those children looking for something to do. "'Ham'-sensei! When the heck are you going to start training us!?"
-- -- --
The 'Kon' Man
By: Typewriterman
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The office was a familiar sight to him, haven practically grown up in it since he was a child. Although the lack of tobacco in the air was a welcome change, nothing else seemed different about the strewn about papers and hundreds of scrolls written for all manner of subjects and topics. Instead now, a specific odor—no, an essence resonated all throughout the Hokage's office, of which made anyone that walked in reach a higher state of hunger than they ever thought possible. He couldn't help it though, as ramen was his favorite food of all time.
In fact, that was exactly what the young blond man did as he sat in his large and comfortable chair; slurping up long strands of ramen as if he were still a child. Well, he would always be a child at heart. At first glance, the man looked far from prestigious—perhaps the noodles being stuffed into his face did something to destroy the image. He wore casual loose clothes rather than the silken white robes of the Hokage, of course that was something he saved for whenever he went out in public.
Still though, the young Jonin awaiting for his "preoccupied" Lord Hokage started to slowly lose his patience. No one else would even think of doing what he planned to do, but Konohamaru was certainly not just "anyone else", nor had he ever learned what so many others had learned before him. He stepped forward towards the table, and grasped the lid of the bowl. The blond man who sat behind the table elicited a soft feral sounding growl, causing Konohamaru's hand to twitch with anxiety. Not wanting to risk losing his hand, he quickly let go.
"Uh, sorry…" he chuckled apologetically. Surprised at his sudden show of cowardice, Konohamaru readied his hand for another go, but chickened out at the last minute; perhaps the sparkle of the fork at the ready did something to his morale. "So…" Konohamaru decided to change his tactics, "…what is it that you wanted to see me for, Naruto?" He tried his best to keep casual with his one time mentor and lifetime rival. With a final slurp, the blond man slammed the porcelain bowl on the desk with a loud thud, and sighed out with excited glee.
"Hmmm, that hit the spot…" Naruto Uzumaki lightly patted his stomach, and gently tossed the bowl into the pile with the others right next to the desk. His piercing blue eyes glanced at the young man standing relatively upright in front of him, and cleared his throat just slightly. With a simple flick of his wrist, he had several papers in his hand that he slid across the table towards the young man. "What are you doing, standing there, Konohamaru? Take a seat!" he extended his hand toward an empty chair, to which the Jonin reluctantly took. "So…the reason I called you here, huh?"
"Yeah, that was kind of the idea…" Konohamaru replied sarcastically, hardly the tone one takes with their village's leader, but Naruto took the comment with stride and simply grinned. "It seemed kind of urgent when I received the message, you know…"
"Oh, and it is…" the man's smile grew even bigger now. Without saying anything further, not that it mattered anyways. It was all Konohamaru needed to know; Naruto had something planned, alright. There was no way he could hide it with that wily smile of his…
--
It was maybe a week or two since he had last been in the village, not to mention about a year or two since he had last visited the school building, but time tends to take on a different perceptive length when your life is on the line for that long. Nevertheless, Konohamaru smiled at the nostalgic memories that flashed in his mind as he walked down the hallways.
'Things used to look so much bigger…' He mused silently to himself as he glanced up and about the school. The small square windows were once so high, but now they were just low enough for him to look out without needing to tiptoe. The wooden floors were well kept, most likely because of troublemakers forced to clean them as punishment. Konohamaru laughed out loud suddenly when he thought about the several times he did his part to clean the floors. Looking ahead, a group of young men and women stood around, as if waiting for something to happen.
"What's so funny, man?" a bespectacled man adjusted his round glasses with a smile, his head protector loosely wrapped around his neat hair. Wearing a very similar vest to Konohamaru, he and several other adults looked strangely at the Jonin when he very randomly laughed. "It's been a while, huh?" the two of them shook hands with genuine excitement, their smirks almost bright enough to light a dark and damp cave.
"That's crap, you know that?" Konohamaru suddenly feigned anger toward the other and a heavy silence befell between the two as they scowled at each other…before bursting out in laughter so robust, that tears began to form in their eyes. "R-remember before I left, you-"
"Moegi got you good!" Because he wore glasses, the other had to lift his lenses before he could lightly drag a finger to wipe his tears.
Breathing heavily and slowly calming down, only softer chuckles and guffaws escaped from the two men's open mouths. "Wow, it's great to see you, Udon!" Konohamaru smirked, to which his friend returned the favor. "Where the heck is that 'prude', anyhow?" he asked with a slight laugh.
"Well for one thing, Hogake-sama excused her from being a sensei to go on a mission…"
"What?" Konohamaru predictably exclaimed, "That jerk never told me that…" crossing his arms and pouting at the thought, the bushy haired ninja was oblivious to the stares from the other jonin awaiting their students in the hallway.
"That's not a nice thing to say about Hokage-sama, Kon-kun…" Udon tried his best to chastise his friend as the strange stares continued to persist.
"Meh, I'll call that blond haired freak whatever I want!"
"Hey, keep it down, Konohamaru…" groaned out a voice from behind him. Turning around, Konohamaru was confronted with an older man, perhaps in his late thirties, wearing the vest of Konoha as well. "I don't want the genins to think they can be rambunctious just because you are all the time."
"Eh? Old Man…who do you think you…?" after careful inspection, Konohamaru's eyebrow twitched. Perhaps, he may have recognized him after seeing the familiar scar on the bridge of the man's nose. "Ah! A ghost!!"
"…What the…?" Iruka Umino blinked in response to the younger man's reaction, before furrowing his own eyebrows and scowled with rage. "Hey! I'm not that old, you brat!!" He quickly latched onto the younger man's collar and shook with a ferocity he hadn't used in years. Laughing at his old sensei's anger, Konohamaru realized he was starting to get dizzy from the raucous shaking that he was being given and His groans and pleas came off like an oscillating fan.
Eventually ceasing his assault, Iruka managed to calm down with the help of seven or eight other of the adults in the hallway, who had to pull him off the younger man. "So, how's the new crop, Headmaster Umino? Or is it Headmaster Umino-sensei…? Umino-Headmaster-sensei?" Sighing as Konohamaru continued all of the different combinations, Iruka placed his hand on the younger jonin's shoulder. Chuckling again, Konohamaru playfully scratched his chin with a nervous smirk. "S-sorry, it's just that this'll be my first time as a genin teacher…"
"It's alright, Konohamaru…" Iruka patted his former student's shoulder with confidence, "You've already done so much for the village, and I'm sure that you'll do great with your new students." Smiling toward the elder man, Konohamaru couldn't resist having regained his respect because of his never ending supportive role in his life.
"…or, you'll fail like you do most things, 'Kon'-kun!" Udon added with a smile and a slight laugh.
"Hey, shut up before I wail on you, you nerd!" Konohamaru angrily shook a fist at the bespectacled man in response.
"And so, starting with group one…" a voice echoed from within the classroom, catching the attention of the jonin and Iruka as well.
"Ah, it looks like the distribution of genin is underway…" the Academy Headmaster nodded and began walking down the hall. "Don't worry so much, Konohamaru, you're going to do great!" he waved as he turned around the corner to continue his leisurely patrol.
-- -- --
"Heh…what a load of…" he remarked, remembering the older man's words.
"Ham-sensei!" one of the kids yelped out again, this time tossing a rock to accentuate his displeasure at the situation.
Deftly avoiding the rock, Konohamaru slid off the branch to hang down like it was a monkey bar. "Hey, quit calling me that!!" he yelled back. "Refer to me by my full name, or else I won't acknowledge any of you!" Dropping to the ground without difficulty, he stood proudly—but irritated—before the three young genin in front of him. "My name isn't 'Ham'-sensei…" Konohamaru repeated himself.
"Aww, but 'Ham'-sensei is so much cuter than your real name!" the kunoichi in the middle commented with a soft and sincere smile, much to his dismay
"…that's not the point!" Konohamaru exclaimed, before realizing that he was getting over agitated by such a simple manner. Sighing to calm himself down, he glanced at the three kids again and rubbed the back of his head out of habit. "…uh…what were your names, again?" he asked without shame and the utmost seriousness, eliciting groans from the kids.
"That's the point of this whole meeting! Are you stupid or something, Ham-sensei!?" the same outspoken student complained and even pointed an accusing finger toward the man in front of him.
"…that's it!" Konohamaru growled and cracked his knuckles, having enough of the boy's constant disrespect.
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End Chapter (1)
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Author's Notes: With the way Shippuuden has been going, I don't know if any of my ideas are going to be canon, haha! Ah well, that's what editing is for, no?
Anyway, This is "technically" my first Naruto fanfic, so please treat me well. Though majority of the story has already been planned out, actually writing it will be a problem for a while because of school. Feel free to critique as much as you want. What doesn't kill me only makes me stronger...or leave me crippled for the rest of my life...I forget how this stuff works...
A better explanation will be in the next chapter's A/N, when I've established a bit more with the characters and such...Bye Bye!!
...legalities...
based on the manga/anime created by Masashi Kishimoto