Carry Him Gently
Writer's note: So, snippets of this fic have been written for like a year now. It's funny how you can sit on something for so long and then one day it just all comes together.
Belle runs not knowing where she is going. All she knows is the child in her arms must be kept safe. She promised him she would keep his son safe, and she'll defend the baby until every drop of blood is drained from her body.
Belle's breathing is ragged, and smoke from the chilly evening air huffs about her face. She clutches the whimpering child to her breast, hoping her warmth will soothe him.
The past month has been surreal. One day she is cleaning the Dark Castle as Rumpestiltskin's caretaker, the next she is an instant mother to his long lost child he's only spoken vaguely of. She had no knowledge of his need to find the boy, only of the loss of the child that was harbored inside him. She felt her heart wrench for every tiny account he gave her of Baelfire. He loved the boy deeper than she could fathom.
The whirling of a wind storm brought Belle to the tower in great haste. She knew his magical experiments were dangerous and knew all magic came with a price. She hoped he had not transformed himself into a toad. Kissing Rumpelstiltskin as a toad was not on her list of accomplishments.
Belle was almost to the landing of the tower when the wind calmed. She called his name, concern saturating her voice. What welcomed her was a sight she never imagined to find.
In the middle of the disheveled and tossed-about room stood Rumpelstiltskin clutching a bundle of rags to his chest. Belle cautiously stepped across overturned furniture and scattered objects heading towards him. She opened her mouth to speak, but her voice caught in her throat when a soft cry escaped the bundle.
"What happened?" she gasped breathlessly, wide eyed, after the shock wore off.
Rumpelstiltskin tore his gaze from the child in his arms, his large eyes wild and bewildered. She'd never seen him so shaken. "Bae" was all he could utter, holding the baby out for her to see.
It was not a baby he tried to conjure from space and time, no, it was the boy he had lost centuries ago. Only a few, mostly ones of great magic, are still around to have lived when the boy did. Those few of great magic are the ones she is running from.
It is not natural to steal a person from their time in history, but it was the only way to bring Baelfire back. Wherever he vanished from, he no longer exists. He exists in the here and now, a newborn baby helpless and crying for comfort for a mother.
She wishes not for the first time for Rumpelstiltskin to be there by her side, protecting them, guiding her to safety, gazing at them both as if her and his child were his universe. But he is not here, and she is alone with an infant clutched to her breast. His magic, however, is all about them. He cast an invisibly spell about them making them unseen only to those who seek them. His instructions were simple: keep running until you feel the need to stop.
As simple as they were, the instructions did not bring comfort in the least. Belle is exhausted and frightened and her need to stop and rest is great. She asked how she would know when to stop, but he told her she would feel it deep in her chest.
The tree she leans against is not where she should end her journey, and Belle pushes off, staggering into the darkness of the forest once more.
"I calculated wrong."
Belle stares, startled, at his confession. "What do you mean?"
Rumpelstiltskin shifts the babe in his arms to lay on his shoulder, the boy calming as he gently pats his back. "This was supposed to be Bae from the day I lost him, but somehow I went too far and took him from the day I arrived home from war to see him for the first time." He clutched the babe, firmly but gently, desperate to never let him go. "He must go back. History will be changed if I keep him."
Pain was written over his scaly face, and Belle raised a hand to her heart, feeling the pain as well. What would it be for Rumpelstiltskin to have a fresh start with his son? He needed it desperately, but his words were true. She didn't know much of time traveling, but if you stole someone from history, life as they knew it would change.
"I'm sorry" she said sympathetically, feeling her own eyes well in tears for his despair.
"To reconstruct the spell will take time." Rumpelstiltskin finally turned anguish eyes upon her, stepping over strode books to stand before Belle. "Will you help me care for him until the spell is complete?"
He trusted her with the thing he loved most, and that trust spoke more to Belle than any words of conformation ever could. The spell would take a month to construct and Rumpelstiltskin guaranteed her the time would not change anything in such a short period, as long as Bae was placed back on the day he was taken.
In a month's time, one could grow to love what one is caring for and Belle could feel the love for the boy swelling in her heart. He slept with her at night while his Papa was in the tower working. At first, it was awkward and frightened her to the point of not sleeping for days, but Bae was a calm child and her fears settled as she slumbered with a protective hand against his warm little body.
Rumpelstiltskin would take Bae in the morning to feed him. She'd trekked to the great room, finding the babe cuddled in Rumpelstitlskin's arms as he held a milk pouch to Bae's mouth. Belle never imagined the wily sorcerer to have a paternal bone in his body, but it warmed her heart to see that side of him. He was a father, through and through.
Caring for Bae brought them closer than they both ever intended to be.
A soft knock caught Belle's attention, and she looked up from her pillow. "Come in."
Rumpelstiltskin peeked around the door, meekly, his eyes falling on the sleeping babe beside her. "May I-" he hesitated, swallowing hard, "-stay here tonight?"
The question threw Belle for a moment, but the thought of Rumpelstiltskin lying in her bed, cradling his son beside her was very much welcomed. "Of course."
It was in that moment, lying on her bed, peering through the dim candlelight at Rumpelstiltskin's glittering face that Belle knew she loved him. He had reached his hand across Bae, and taking her hand in his, he squeezed it tenderly in a gesture that she could only assume was 'thank you'.
They could have been a family. A small, happy family in an oversized castle with no need for want. But Bae had to be sent back, and Belle still runs as Rumpelstiltskin rushes to complete the spell.
Finally, finally, she feels the unyielding tug in her chest to stop. In an instant, Rumpelstiltskin appears by her side. "We must hurry" he informs, struggling to keep the tremor from his voice. "We must say goodbye."
Belle knew this day would come. Baelfire had to go back. No matter how deeply she and his Papa loved him, he had to go back. Tears stream down her cheeks as she lifts the babe to look into his half-lidded eyes. "I love you, Bae. I hope to see you again." She presses a tender kiss to his forehead, and reluctantly hands him to Rumpelstiltskin.
She listens to the gently words he murmurs to his young son, and feels the pain of a father having to let go of his son for the second time. Rumpelstiltskin has said his goodbyes for the last time. The wind begins to blow and a swirling of light flashes and in less than a minute, Bae is gone and the wind slowly calms.
How does one feel after letting go of something so precious to them? Belle has never felt her heart break in two, but she can understand what it is like now and her sobs take control. Rumpelstiltskin's arm wraps about her shoulders, pulling her against his chest and they stay there for what seems like hours holding each other, comforting each other.
It is Rumpelstiltskin's voice that breaks the fragile mood. "I can get you a child," he whispers into the darkness.
Belle pulls away, surprised at his offer. She doesn't want just another child. She wants his child. There can be no other way. "We could have a child of our own" she says, weakly, hoping he will not push her away at the thought. "We could be a family."
There is a spark in his large eyes, a hope that she has never seen in them hold before. "We could?" his voice is rough from tears and sorrow and disbelief.
Belle nods, caressing his cheek. "I love you, Rumpelstiltskin."
They may never have a happily ever after, but real life is not always happy. It's filled with mountains and valleys, and sometimes you must crawl before you can run. But Belle knows that if they can survive this, they will survive anything that is to come.