WOMAN HOOD –a kyouyaxtamaki fanfict…12/5/2006

Womanhood chpt 1 a&b: in which Kyouya became Kyouko

It was another day in the Host Club; Tamaki had everyone dress up in lavish costumes and girls fondled over Honey and Haruhi. Tamaki flirted endlessly with his customers while Kyouya sat in his chair by the table typing cheerfully over the money they were racking in.
It was a just another day, but something was very different. A young freshman was sitting in the corner eyeing Kyouya. Tamaki noticed and went over.
"Hello, can I help you, lost kitten?"
The girl looked up at his with a scowl "You're the one who LIED to Kirimi!" she yelled accusingly, causing the host club king to step back.
Tamaki blinked, how did she know Miss Kirimi? He wondered.
However when he started to ask Haruhi pointed out she wasn't there.
The flax colored prince gazed over and gasped. The darkly dressed young girl was gazing at Kyouya.
Tamaki sped over and whispered "Hey, Kyouya!"
Kyouya didn't turn around "What?" he asked sounding annoyed.
Tamaki looked over at the girl non-discreetly "That girl is looking"
Kyouya sighed, "That's sort of the point isn't it?!"
The prince shook his head vigorously "Not at me!"
The megane looked over to her and then shrugged.
"Ask her if she wants to rent me out then, Baka..." he suggested sounding more irritated than annoyed now.

Haruhi felt an ominous darkness coming from behind her, where the girl was standing.
"Um, Sempai?" she started.
"Yes, Haruhi?" Kyouya said nonchalantly.
"I don't think that girl wants to be a customer"
"Then shoo her out! This isn't a free show."
Haruhi wondered why she bothered explaining when Kyouya was in money-mode.
Defeated Haruhi turned but the girl was gone, she looked around, blinked then sighed.

The rest of the day was uneventful, Kyouya wrote it in his notebook as he walked down the hall.
He didn't notice the shadowy figure behind him chanting.
Suddenly he heard Nekozawa yelling "Don't, Tsuki!"
The megane turned just in time to see a bright flash.
The host club members heard the commotion and came rushing out of the two double doors of the music room. Haruhi walked out because she was carrying teacups on a tray. Tamaki looked around and saw smoke in a spot and heard coughing,"KYOUYA!!" He yelled dashing over. Diving into the smoke, the twins and Haruhi heard a loud PHUMP. A young girl yelling "idiot" and another thump followed it.
Tamaki was very confused, for one thing this girl sounded a lot like Kyouya, and she even smelled like him. Tamaki had grown accustomed to smelling green tea and ink from the be-spectacled fellow. "Um Kyouya?!" the smoke began to clear and a young woman was sitting like she'd fallen. This woman had a Male uniform and Kyouya's glasses but now pinkly framed glasses and with long glossy black hair.
"Yes, it's me idiot, I look like Kyouya don't I...?!" she said.
Tamaki got very wide-eyed. Haruhi gasped and dropped the tray breaking two cups. The twins just stood there gaping.
Nekozawa blinked "That didn't work like it was supposed to...hn..."
Tamaki turned and glared at him. "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MOMMY! DADDY IS NOT PLEASED!" He screamed shaking the darkly cloaked boy. Nekozawa felt his wig fall off and screamed bloody murder. The twins were too busy poking Kyouya in various areas, to notice Nekozawa's pained shrieks. 'Ohh! Kyouya's skin is ssoooo soft and squishy!"
Haruhi stared at them, as always they invaded people's personal space. But they were poking his chest now and that was too much. She grabbed them and dragged them off and made them sit in a chair.
Hikaru frowned and pouted, while Kaoru blinked.
Kyouya looked down and blinked. He pulled back his collar and turned very white.
"Erm...why am I..."
Haruhi sighed and dragged him off with her while Tamaki was busy yelling at Nekozawa.
Meanwhile Tsuki followed Haruhi.

Kyouya was pushed behind the curtain and was handed an pink undergarment. She/he stared at it and looked at Haruhi confused
"What's this?"
"A bra" Haruhi said looking annoyed...
Kyouya turned white again, looking at the bra and then Haruhi. He paused "you…. Your-"
Haruhi closed the curtain and stomped away. Her temperament changed when she saw Tsuki. "Oh, its you? Sorry about Tamaki, he's sort of-"
"It's my fault!" She blurted out looking sad.
Haruhi was about to ask what she was talking about when Kyouya's voice called for her.
She noticed Kyouya sounded oddly humble, not like his normal calm self-assured voice.
Haruhi stopped short of the curtain "What is it Kyouya-sempai"
Kyouya's head poked out, Haruhi was taken back by his embarrassed look.
"I...um...broke it."
"Eh?"
"That...thing you..."
"My bra?"
"Yes..."
"You…broke my bra?"
-Kyouya nodded, Tsuki behind her blinked.
"Um it's probably because of sizes..." she muttered.
Kyouya looked at her harshly "Excuse me, who are you!?" she demanded then turned over to Haruhi "Why is she here?!" turning the glare her way.
Haruhi didn't know what to say except "You're really bitchy as a girl, Kyouya-sempai..."
Kyouya was indignant "Shut up! I'm not bitchy!" for along time Haruhi and the now female Kyouya argued about her temperament being "bitchy".
Suddenly Renge-san appeared and announced "Kyouya I know why your bra is broken!"
Haruhi started to interject it was hers but Renge kept on "We must go shopping!"
Renge grabbed Kyouya and Haruhi started to follow but she was stopped.
"This is a GIRLS ONLY shopping day!"
Haruhi suddenly remembered that to Renge-san she was a He. "Oh...yeah..."
Kyouya looked distressed, "Hey! Haruhi don't leave me with this...this otaku!" she screamed as she was dragged off.

Meanwhile Tamaki has finally noticed the shadow king was missing and was thinking the worse.
"He's been kidnapped and is being forced to be a geisha by evil men!"
the twins looked at each other and sighed "For the fifth time, Milord, Kyouya went with Haruhi!"
Nekozawa nodded and looked through an old book with the words 'spells for idiots' on the cover. Hours passed and they waited, Tamaki started pacing, saying that Kyouya and Haruhi were both kidnapped and forced to be geishas. Finally the twins hit Tamaki over the head and brought him to a car.
The low blood pressure king found himself in the commoner's mall again. He wondered why Renge didn't simply call stylist to MAKE a bra instead of this.
"Oohh look this one has lace!" Renge chirped.
Kyouya secretly vowed to kill Haruhi for allowing her to kidnap herself. "Look! This one has lace AND flowers!!" she chirped again.
Kyouya felt the urge to kill rising and yelled " JUST PICK ONE AND BUY IT YOU DOLT!"
Renge stared at the now female Kyouya with a surprised look. But this only lasted two seconds; soon she had faced the rack again and was shuffling through the selection.
Then Kyouya knew he was doomed and dejectedly looked around for someone working there.
A very chipper older lady appeared she smiled warmly at Kyouya,"Oh dear! You need him, Love?" she asked still smiling.
Kyouya was speechless but managed to nod thinking 'Please god deliver me from this crazy otaku.' the older woman took her arm and dragged the girl into a booth. This was followed by a lot of prodding and Kyouya wondered if this counted as sexual harassment.
It took the crazy otaku 40 minutes to notice Kyouya was missing; the missing one flinched when she heard a loud scream followed this.
"OY! WHERE DID HARUHI'S GIRLFRIEND GO!!!!???" Renge's voice bellowed in the store.
Kyouya was stunned. 'Me? The girlfriend of Haruhi...?' she questioned in her mind. Then suddenly got an evil thought 'Ah yes pretend to be Haruhi's girlfriend...that'd be enough revenge...' Kyouya felt himself smiling deviously and heard the attendant scream and run out yelling "ONI!! It's an ONI!!"

Meanwhile Tamaki's inner mind theater was busy picturing kyouya in a lacy bra and pants. The twins began poking him when they noticed the nosebleed and puddle.
Haruhi had gone home. She sat by the table and waited till she heard the doorbell. Sighing, because she expected this she opened it and told them "Kyouya went bra shopping with Renge-san..." in a sharp tone.
Tamaki, the twins and Mori were all shocked, mostly Mori because he hadn't seen girl-Kyouya yet. Honey looked cutely confused "What's a bra?"
The entire group fell deathly quiet. Then Mori sighed and muttered "err ...well..."
All eyes turned to Haruhi, who glared at them. Fearing the woman's furry they looked away quickly. Tamaki shouted, "Let's go to Kyouya's house!" Then grabbed Haruhi and dragged her into the large limo.

Haruhi hadn't seen the Ootori mansions yet so she was taken back by how dark and minimal it was. "Is Kyouya like Nekozawa?" she asked Tamaki. The prince sighed "His dad is very serious..."
As if summoned the head popped up and glared at them "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY SON!!??" he roared at the members.
No one said anything, "WHY IS HE WEARING A DRESS?!" The older Ootoris looked confused and were trying to read their papers as if nothing was at all odd.

The twins looked at each other and then everyone ran to Kyouya's room.
Haruhi didn't want to go in, hearing a very angry girls voice inside but the others opened the door.
Behind the door, the host club saw Kyouya in a dress that looked suspiciously like Yomiko Readmen's yelling at a very distressed Renge-san and Fuyume-san who was trying to keep her brother/sister from attacking.
Tamaki was overcome and grabbed Kyouya's hand bent on one knee.
"Will you give me your lovely hand in marriage!?" he asked sweetly.
The now female Kyouya stared at him behind glinted pink frames.
Haruhi knew what was coming and sighed. Tamaki hit the left wall of Kyouya's room and all of the nicely hung clothes fell on him. Kyouya was fuming when the host club turned back to him. The twins could see fires raging behind her.
As a whole the club decided to flee and grabbed Tamaki's corpse and left.
Soon after being abandoned by Haruhi, Tamaki and the other three; Kyouya was a wreck.
She was so tired and hoarse from yelling at the otaku, that she walked around like a zombie.
Kyouya ,as you ought to know, has 2 older brothers and one sister, and said siblings are used to Kyouya being a Boy, not a very cute girl. So one should not blame them for their actions.
As soon as Kyouya left his room his brother, lets call him Ueno, glomped her and cried "YOUR SOOOO CY-U-TE!" The youngest Ootori blinked and looked up at him distressed.
Next his second older brother came in and grabbed Kyouya from Ueno's evil clutches and set her down. He then smiled and pat her on the head.
After this the two brothers had a conversation over letting Tamaki, who'd called asking if Kyouya was done being violent, should be allowed to be alone with their little sister. Said little sister was incapacitated on the couch, having fainted after his/her brothers were nice.
Fuyume came in and sighed, picked up her now little sister and brought her to her room where it was safe.

The next day, Fuyume came in to awake Kyouya up, saying Tamaki left a package at the door. When the youngest Ootori opened it she scowled saying "I'll kill him!" and went into his/her closet and put on the male uniform. Fuyume sighed, "That won't work, and you're too busty! Here try it on it will look so cute on you!" she suggested holding it up and smiling. Kyouya looked at her like he'd been betrayed, sighed and snatched the yellow dress out of her hands. Grudgingly, the Ouran high school girl's uniform enveloped Kyouya's womanly form. Fuyume squealed and hugged her saying "Your so cute Kyouya!"

When he was dragged out of her room for breakfast, the two brothers dropped their mouths when she came in. Ueno bit his napkin muttering "Kawaii" as she sat down, Yoshiro just shook his head at the oldest Ootori. The head was less than happy demanding an explanation. And so the youngest Ootori told them the long and odd story of how he was bewitched by some girl into being a girl.
The head took the story surprisingly well "Ah I see..." he muttered nodding and rubbing his chin, "Well then for the time being I'll allow it. However you can't have Suo-kun in your room alone anymore."
Kyouya blinked at him, wondering why he suddenly seemed to care. He'd never been accustomed to niceness coming from his brothers or father. It seemed like the head thought that it would make him weak to be hugged or kissed on the cheek. Sure Fuyume had hugged him once or twice but never when anyone else was watching her. In his heart he was happy for the affection but she in her mind she was afraid when he turned back they'd ignore him again.
The siblings didn't give her long enough time to dwell on that thought. As soon as they saw the sad look on their cute little sister's face the all ran up and hugged her. The head sighed and looked back at his paper.

-----
Next day Haruhi was unwilling to go to school, but her father insisted. So she went to the music room after class and sighed before opening it. She noticed something right away.
NO Costumes.
NO greeting in unison.
Haruhi sighed knowing that she should have played sick today.
Kyouya appeared in front of her and yelled "HOW COULD YOU HARUHI!!" Haruhi blinked. She didn't hear the rest of Kyouya's yelling because she noticed his/her clothes. "You...your wearing the Ouran girls..." she stuttered.
Kyouya stopped complaining and sighed, "Yes. That well..." she turned and glared at Tamaki who looked very happy.
Haruhi instantly felt sympathy. "He seems to like girls with long hair and dresses..."
Kyouya nodded, "By the way I see what you meant. This hair weighs a ton. Do you have scissors?"
Haruhi stared at the taller one, then reached in her bag and took out some. Tamaki sensed something wrong and turned around fearfully. He was just in time to watch Kyouya put her hair in a ponytail and chop it all off it one swift cut.
Tamaki was beside himself.
"UWAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" he cried pulling on his golden locks.
Kyouya plugged up his ears then tossed the locks at Tamaki. The prince cradled them and cried softly. Hikaru said it was a shame then sighed.
"Kyouya's still cute..."
Kaoru nodded smiling.
"Kyouya is cuter than Haruhi!"
"Cute the girls stacked!"
Kyouya suddenly felt a strong urge to beat the twins into a bloody pulp.
Turning to Haruhi he asked, "Do you also feel like hitting guys when they act this way?" Haruhi blinked at her. "Well yes but you learn to repre-" she started but it was interrupted by a loud, "NO!"
Renge-sans voice shout out as she came up from under the floor. Haruhi felt that she was in some parallel universe everyday in this room. "That anger is the Righteous Womanly Furry!" Kyouya seemed unphased by he entrance and muttered, "I see…righteous furry…." He nodded and plastered on a cute smile.
"Oh Hikaru-kun, Kaoru-kun!" she called in a sugar coated voice. Haruhi suddenly felt an ominous dark presence coming from the now female host member, she knew she ought to be nice to the twins are warn them. However it was really there own fault, so she looked the other way.
The twins were completely unknowing. "Hey Kyouya!" they greeted the busty girl.
Haruhi heard a loud CRASH and Hikaru yelling "OMG Kaoru!"
Kaoru was faking bad injury and Hikaru looked worried. "Hi...Hika...Ru?" Kaoru asked weakly.
"I'm here! Kaoru!" Hikaru shouted.
Kaoru fell limp and Hikaru cried "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Tamaki came up beside Kyouya who was looking oddly cheerful and said "Now mother I know the boys are rude, but mother shouldn't be abusive to her children!"
Kyouya looked at him, and at Renge-san.
"Can I hit him too?"
"AHH domestic violence!" Tamaki shouted flailing.
Kyouya looked at him, and Tamaki froze. Ten minutes passed and nothing.
Tamaki was sweating bullets. "No! Please mommy not in front of our daughter! She's too cute and innocent to see you this way!" he pleaded clinging to Kyouya's leg.
Kyouya paused and sighed, "Fine I won't, now let go your idiot..."
Tamaki's face brighten up immediately "Mother has forgiven me!" he announced. The twins popped up, Kaoru looking perfectly fine except he was holding his shoulder.
"Kyouya is a scary as a girl!" Hikaru said.
"I miss the old Kyouya. "Kaoru said, looking nostalgic.
Kyouya turned around looking fearsome "What's wrong with how I'm acting?" she asked.
The twins cowered behind 'daddy'. Tamaki was just as scared, "Err, well..."
"You're being a bitch." Haruhi said suddenly,Tamaki and the twins gaped at her.
Kyouya turned towards her with a more fearsome look. Haruhi was busying sipping tea.
Kyouya screamed, "Why do you keep calling me such mean things Haruhi!?"
"Because your acting like one."
"But…but"
Tamaki blinked when he heard Kyouya's voice cracking. He and the twins leaned over to see his face then stepped back gaping.
Kyouya was crying buckets. Haruhi looked up at him and sighed standing up.
She reached up and pats Kyouya's head, "Sorry..."she said, "but you can't be mean to people just because they're perverts."
the twins were annoyed "Hey!"
Haruhi ignored them "It makes woman look bad."
Kyouya sighed and leaned into Haruhi's chest, "Sorry Haruhi"

The twins grinned thinking 'moe moe' and took pictures while Tamaki blinked.
'Why am I feeling so excited?' he wondered, looking distressed and confused.
Renge-san popped up through the floor saying "Ah the bond between women! So lovely!"

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NOTES!
The "moe moe" thing is supposed to be parodying ep. 23
Where the customers are 'fangirling' over Ristu x Haruhi.
I plan on parodying ep.24 later on...kuukukukukukukkuuku
I SWEAR THERES KyouyaxTamaki later on!!

My story already goes a bad review on person said I was a bad writer.
This person also said I stereotyped gothic, and used it it the wrong way.
Mind you I meant that neko is very Goth and emo. if you'd like to dispute that...I'm not gonna listen. Neko is very into the dark arts and stuff. If you're insulted then ok.
I'm not going to dispute the 'bad writer' part. This is because I fear I actually suck at it.
I write too much like I'm writing an essay and not like a book.
I will mention to you that the person who wrote that review has NO stories at all that she's written. So...yeah...
Edit Nov, 1 I took out Goth… now its more like Haruhi saying does Kyouya worship darkness too? Nekozawa is still Goth damn you!
--

Omake #1
Kaoru was just sitting in the music room/host club headquaters looking very bored. suddenly he noticed Kyouya's notebook left alone on his table. An michievious grin grew on his face as he inched over to it. He looked around to make sure he was alone before snatching it up. This wasnt the first time he'd snuck a read,Kyouya had been careless enough to leave it unguarded four times already. But it usually wasnt so facisnating and he'd put it back with disapointment. Today was not like those times...
Tamaki walked in looking cheerfull when he heard Kaoru's evil chuckling. He glanced over saying "oy! what are you up-" he stoped when he saw the thing in the boys evil clutches. "MOMMY's NOTEBOOK!? ARE YOU MAD BOY!!???" he shouted looking stressed. He rescued the notebook and cradled it saying "Cruel son! invading mommies personal notes like that! SHAME!!!" shaking a finger at him. Kaoru didnt seem to be paying attention his eyes were looking over tamakis shoulder. He smiled and snickered as Kyouya loomed behind the flax-colored head of the prince. tamaki should have been able to see the dark purple aura behind him. "YOOOUUUU!!!" be-lowed the now-female host club member. tamaki turned around intime to see her mouth open and fangs glint. "ah...Kyouya its not! He.." he tried to explain but Kyouya wasnt listening. she snatched the notebook away and cried "HOW DARE YOU READ MY DIARY WITHOUT PERMISSION!!!"
"ah But Mommy! Daddy di-" he paused ,surely he hadnt heard right. "Excuse me..." he began looking confused,"did you say...your..." he couldnt say it. It was too girly,surely he'd heard wrong. Kyouya was busy cuddling the notebook and didnt see tamaki growing ever the more confused. " Daddy didnt...it was...I didn't...daddy needs to sleep"
and with that the prince fainted into a chair Hikaru pushed his way as he entered.
"It says 'my diary' in pink glitter pen inside..." Kaoru whispered to his twin,Hikaru started laughing so hard tears came out. Kyouya apeared behind them "SO IT WAS YOU!!!!!!???"
'oh no' Kaoru thought fearfully turning around to see a demonic Kyouya.
but his anger was cut off when he saw Tamaki. "DADDY!???" he cried looking worried and rushing to his side. The twins looked close to death as Haruhi came in.
"AH DAUGHTER!!" kyouya cried holding Tamaki "Daddy is not well!"
Haruhi stopped dead and gawked at her,"uhnn" Kyouya face read dissapointed as she turned her gaze at the twins "since daughter is busy YOU go get water!"
the twins turned towards eachother and shot of the door vowing never to read the notebook again.
after they had gone Kyouya stood up with a evil smirk and said "That'll teach you not to read my notebook without permission kaoru..." then he looked at Haruhi smiling. Haruhi sighed and shrugged because the Megane was always doing werid things.