Mukashi Mukashi (previously titled Through the Thicket)

Disclaimer: I am likely to own Detective Conan and/or Magic Kaito as I am likely to be a middle-aged Japanese man. However, since this is the internet, that's actually a possibility...

Heiji was vaguely aware of the wind whizzing past his ears. He shivered. God it was cold. Had he left the window open?

The male teen shifted and pulled his pillow closer to him. Ahhh. It was so warm and soft. He snuggled closer to it. Suddenly, he felt like he was being thrown into the air, jolted from the warmth of his bedding.

CRASH

The next thing he knew, he was kissing the ground. Nothing like a mouthful of dirt to start your day.

Wait...dirt?

Heiji bolted upright and looked around. Foreign trees loomed over him as a chilly wind blew. He certainly wasn't in his room anymore. Or his house. Or Osaka for that matter. He also had a very bad inkling that this wasn't even Japan anymore. It seemed like he was in some kind of forest. Before he could panic further, the sound of a foot tapping on the soft earth made him turn around.

His eyes trailed up from his seat on the ground. He saw brown riding boots that went up to the knees, black pants, a bright red jacket over a white tube top, and the face of a very very angry Kazuha.

"K-Kazuha," Heiji managed to spit out. The ponytailed girl's anger suddenly faded, giving way to surprise and then suspicion.

"Who exactly are you and how do you know my name?" the girl demanded.

"What do you mean?" Heiji cocked an eyebrow. "It's me, Heiji! Your best friend! The Great Detective of the West? Hattori Heiji, come on!" Honestly, how could Kazuha forget him? What was the ahou trying to pull this time?

The girl looked thoughtful for a moment. "Hmm... We haven't heard of any detectives dropping by," she muttered to herself. She looked at him again and frowned, a tinge of pink creeping up her cheeks for some reason. "I don't believe you," she told him in a steely voice.

Heiji was too dumbfounded to speak. The silence lasted for two seconds before he exploded. "Whattdya mean you don't believe me? Where the heck am I anyway? I wake up and then I'm being hurled to the ground! And now YOU go have amnesia on me! What are ya wearing anyway?"

The girl clutched her crimson jacket defensively, a vein throbbing on her head. "You ungrateful little... I happened to rescue you when you fell out of the sky! And then we were riding back to the kingdom and you- you-groped me! You pervert! We could've both died!" She was almost as red as her jacket as she ranted. "And look at yourself, why dontcha, before talking about my clothes."

Heiji blushed furiously. "I- I thought you were my pillow!" he managed to stammer. The boy looked down and found that he was only wearing a pair of jeans. How'd he get here without a shirt or any shoes? What in the world was happening?

He looked up and saw the girl striding towards a black motorcycle. He jogged up as she was putting on her helmet.

"Kazuha? Since when did you get a bike?" he asked her incredulously.

She returned his stare with a stern gaze. "Look, I mistook you for someone else okay? And I'm pretty sure I'm not this Kazuha person you're looking for either. I'll even let it slide that you physically harassed me back there. Just don't go falling out of the sky anymore."

Heiji gaped. How could she even say such things like people happened to fall from the sky on a day-to-day basis?

"But you are Kazuha. I called you Kazuha then you asked me how I knew your name. That just proves it," Heiji said confidently. At least going into detective mode felt normal...even if he was half-naked talking to his childhood friend (who conveniently didn't remember him) in the middle of the woods.

The girl considered him for a moment before revving her engine. "Okay, Hattori-kun was it?" Heiji flinched at the formality. "I'm in a hurry, but I can give you directions to the nearest doctor," she told him and pointed to a spot between some trees. "Go through there and keep going straight til you see a yellow brick road. It'll take you to The Emerald City and-"

"Hold on," interrupted Heiji. "The Emerald City? Like the one in the Oz story?"

The girl cut off her bike and turned to glare him. "What do you mean story?"

Heiji was used to Kazuha's glares. After almost 19 years of being stuck with her, he's practically grown immune to it. But there was something off-putting with the way this girl glowered at him. Her eyes were hard and full of pain, very much unlike to the tender and expression filled eyes of Kazuha. Heiji felt his insides freeze. He was starting to believe that this really wasn't his childhood friend.

"The book report we had to do for English class?" he supplied, wishing desperately for her to recognize the past assignment.

She frowned, eyes watching him like a cat. "Where are you from?" she asked him slowly, cautiously.

"Osaka, Japan!" Heiji replied. "Where am I?" This has got to be a dream, he thought. "Am I dreaming?" he echoed his thoughts aloud. "I've got to be dreaming!"

The girl stiffened at this. "You're a Dreamer?" she asked wide-eyed but Heiji was too busy trying to pinch himself awake.

"Ow! Crap that hurt!" He paused to study the red mark on his arm. "That hurt... I'm not waking up," alarm was creeping into his voice. "I- What-" Heiji turned to the girl still mounted on the motorcycle, disbelief written all over his face. "The hell's going on?"

The ponytailed girl buried her face in her hands and let out an exasperated sigh. "Lucky me, I stumble upon a Dreamer!" her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Get on," she commanded him. "Let's get this quest over with."

The pair trudged their way through heaps of fallen leaves. It had gotten too dangerous to use the motorcycle as they reached the thickest part of the woods. This left Kazuha2 to push her vehicle beside her (she wouldn't let Heiji touch it).

Heiji had started calling her that in his head after she had shed some light on things. Apparently, he's been transported to this place where characters from stories lived.

"We're only stories where YOU come from, but here we're real people," she snorted when he called them 'fairy tale characters'.

From what Kazuha2 said, people get lost here on the way to Dreamland and are adequately called Dreamers. Whenever a Dreamer shows up,the person who finds them is bound to a quest to help the Dreamer return to their world. It was some kind of ancient rule or whatever.

So here was the Great Detective of the West, lost in some bizarre world made up of fictional characters who happened to be not so fictional after all. Heiji had been clinging on to the possibility that this was still a dream but eventually let it go. He was sure his subconscious could never come up with crack like this.

They continued to walk in silence. Any hopes of conversation died after the explanation given by Kazuha2.

"Oi. If you're characters in my world, who are you supposed to be? I don't remember any stories with a motorcycle," Heiji said, trying to banish the uncomfortable silence. He just wasn't used to the quiet when Kazuha was around... Even if this girl wasn't actually Kazuha, just a fiercer, motorcycle-driving alter ego.

Kazuha2 scoffed. "Like I would know. Your versions are usually sugar-coated," she said with distaste. "But I'm known as Red Rider in some parts of the kingdom. I'm a bounty hunter," she grinned at him wickedly.

To his credit, Heiji looked unfazed. He had his chin in his hand and was contemplating on something. The silence settled back in as they walked on. It lasted for seven minutes until Heiji broke out laughing.

"W-what's wrong with you?" Kazuha2 asked her companion. The boy was practically having a fit.

Heiji took a moment to calm down but was still chuckling. "You're Little Red Riding Hood!" he declared then started cackling again.

A very annoyed Kazuha2 marched towards the main square of the village while a slightly bruised Heiji followed.

"Kazuha or not, she's just as violent," he muttered darkly.

They were now entering what seemed like a medieval-age bar. Inside, however, was like a horrible clash of genres. There were cowboys sitting at a corner, talking animals playing cards at a table, knights taking a swig of beer, and a samurai passed out on the counter. Kazuha2 skillfully maneuvered her way to the far end of the room. Heiji, on the other hand, had to dodge knives thrown by elves playing darts, avoid stepping on about 15 blind mice (several had robot eyes), and sidestep this purple shadow that he was sure was following him. When he finally caught up with the girl in red, she was talking animatedly to a weirdly dressed man. He looked like Kudo. No wait. He looked like...

"Okita?" Heiji blurted out.

"Seems like he knows you too," Kazuha2 smirked.

"Hey, Zuha. Where's his shirt?" teased Okita.

Kazuha2 rolled her eyes. "Don't be stupid. I found him like that; that's why I brought him here. Anyway can you give him some clothes?"

"Alright, I've got some back in the castle. What would you do without me?" jibed the man as he replaced his feathered hat.

Heiji was leaning against the wall, arms crossed. He had been eyeing the conversation between Kazuha2 and Okita. For some reason, it made him furious.

Well whatever. She's not my Kazuha anyway, he told himself.

Wait.

My Kazuha? The the hell was he thinking?

He didn't own Kazuha! And the ahou can go talk to anyone she wants for all he cared. Which he didn't. Of course not.

"I think your little Dreamer's getting impatient," commented Okita. A menacing aura had been permeating from the shirtless teen. The musketeer's comment drew said teen's attention.

"Who are ya supposed to be anyway?" Heiji barked.

"Okita Soshi, royal musketeer, at your service." With that, Okita made a purposely elaborate bow to which Kazuha2 laughed at.

Keh. Heiji was going to be sick. This Okita was even worse than the one he knew. (And it had nothing to do with him being all friendly and chummy and flirty with someone that resembled Kazuha, alright?)

"Don't tell me," Heiji said in a bored tone. "You're part of the three musketeers?"

Okita looked at him with an odd expression. "Well, something like that," the musketeer grinned which reminded Heiji of a certain moonlight magician.

Uh-oh. Heiji had a really bad feeling about this.

A/N: I probably should be working on Dumb Ways to Die or the other chapter stories I never got around posting let alone finishing...but here ya go :D (Somehow, watching 3 Barbie movies straight on TV led to this...so yeah.)

Okita Soshi is actually a character from Yaiba. He was mentioned in DC as Heiji's rival in Kendo. He's from Senshin High School and looks like Shinichi!