Title : What Hurts The Most

Rating : PG-13

Disclaimer : I own neither the show, nor the characters from the show Inuyasha. Those rights belong to TPTB. So no suing.

A/N : This is a little one-shot songfic I wrote when I was bored, so if its crappy, I apologize to all of you. A short piece about Kagome and Inuyasha set to the song What Hurts The Most by Rascall Flatts. I dont own the song or the characters, just this story, so please dont sue me as I have nothing you will want.

lyrics

What Hurts The Most

By Aurora-Sama

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That dont bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out

She sat in her bed, all alone, crying. It was raining outside, a slow drizzle. She could hear it pattering off the clay roof of her house. She was thankful, then, for the rain. It was loud enough that no one in the rest of the house could hear her crying. This was one of those moments where she needed nothing more than to be alone.

Im not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend Im ok
But thats not what gets me

But oddly enough, even her crying didnt bother her anymore. It used to, at first, but the tears had become so routine that even she was unaware of the salty drops that slid down her face. All she could think about was him. His soft white hair, pale features. She missed every bit of him. Even the anger that seemed to fill so much of his heart. It was only when they were alone that he would let that anger abate, and she could see him for what he truly was. Only she knew how sad he was, and how sensitive. Only she could truly see him.

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away

She tried so hard to tell him to stay. She tried so hard to tell him. They were so close, but she felt afraid to say the things she needed. She was afraid to tell him, afraid he would walk away on her, leave her lost and alone. She needed him more than he knew. But she held her feelings inside, wanting to keep him near, wanting him to trust her. He had no one else he could trust, and she didnt want him to lose that because she had a few stupid words to say. So she held it all in.

But even that didnt help. They were so close, and he still walked away. She would never forget the day he did. His fire-red kimono fluttered in the breeze, wrapping gracefully around his muscular body. His long, sleek white hair dancing about his face almost playfully. She never knew it was coming.

And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin to do

She remembered it like it was yesterday. She had loved him, with all of her heart. And he loved her. They were in a relationship, but those three simple words had never come out. He wouldnt allow it. He had lost someone before, and he loved her so much that he was afraid of losing her too. He was afraid of hurting that much again. She guessed that by not allowing the words I love you to get out in the open, neither one would get hurt if they lost the other.

But he left that day. He told her that he had some business to take care of. He had to go finish this all before anyone else innocent got hurt. She had gone with him so far, but he didnt want her to get hurt so he made her stay behind. Kagome looked up to the ceiling, and spoke to herself, hoping that somehow, he would hear her.

You were wrong, Inuyasha You were so wrong. You left for my own good. But it still hurt me.

Its hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But Im doin It
Its hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and Im alone

Kagome thought back on all her friends that she had made in the feudal world. Sango, Miroku, Shippou they all looked on her with pity. They smiled, and laughed, but it was all fake. She knew. When she turned her back the laughs stopped, and the smiles faded. She knew that they would whisper behind her back to each other, talking about how they pitied her. Poor Kagome, they would say. She loved him with all of her heart, and he left her here and ran off to his death. Poor Kagome, couldnt even tell him that she loved him. But they didnt know the whole story.

Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

There was so much she hadnt told him. Not only that she loved him. There was so much more. He hadnt even given her the time to tell him. It was for her own good he said. Then he ran off, not giving her a chance to say anything. Her friends had told her that there was no way he could have known that he would die. But she wondered if maybe he knew all along. She wondered if he was running away from her because maybe somehow he might have known. But she couldnt know that for sure. And she couldnt think like that. She wanted nothing more than to remember the good about him. But not just for her.

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

You didnt even give me time to tell you. A new wave of tears began, and Kagome lay in a fetal position on her bed holding her stomach the whole time. She couldnt bear this anymore. But she had to. She had to be strong. Not just for her, but for her unborn child. She cried into the darkness. You didnt even let me tell you that you were going to be a father.

Not seeing that loving you
Thats what I was trying to do

Kagome stopped her tears and stayed laying on her bed. She laid there for hours, staring into the darkness, letting the tears dry, and letting the puffiness and redness around her eyes to go away. Finally, she heard her mother calling from downstairs that dinner was ready. Kagome stood up, rubbing her slightly swollen belly one last time. She was finally ready to be strong for her baby. For Inuyashaa baby. After all, its what he would have wanted.