This is a fic I ended minutes ago, after watching what happened in TVD tonight. Just bullshit. I have to say I'm done with the show. I can't take it anymore. My Bamon shipper heart is broken into thousand pieces and I don't know what to do now. I don't want to ship them now because it feels a betrayal to me Babe. I love bonnie Bennett. She's a perfect human being. She's the real hero of the show. I don't need to say anything about the others. Caroline really made me love her back. The others can just go to hell for me. The shit in this show is unacceptable. All for Elena's Golden Vagina. All for her. What does she have that everyone loves? She just a manipulating, boring, selfish bitch. The only reason everyone drools over her is because she looks exactly like Katherine and Tatia. And because she's human. All they want! Oh fuck you all! Stop it with the twilight thing!
Ok. I won't rant here but let me say the last thing. How could Damon and Stefan flip a coin to see who was going to kill her? Is this a game for them? I fucking can't with these two. I lost all the love and respect for them. They can die and I wouldn't even care.
Ok, so this fic is some deleted scene that Julie fucking bitch Plec forgot to put on the episode. Can you guess which one is? Yeah… the one where Bonnie finally gets to say how she feels about all the shit they have put on her life. You'll see what I mean.
Dedicated to all the Bennett Brigade that is so sad and hurt right now. But more than that, We're furious. Mad.
I love you all guys. I love you Bonnie Bennett. I love you Kat Graham.
After she tried a couple of time to calm herself, Bonnie decided take her mother to her house so then she had a safe place to be. Where no vampires could get in. Where Elena couldn't get in without opening the door.
Caroline took Abby in her arms and walked with Bonnie outside her house without talking. Bonnie needed time. Bonnie needed silence. Caroline knew that if she said one word about the last event would make bonnie cry again and that would break her.
They walked in silence before reaching Bonnie's car. Caroline opened the back door and laid Abby in the full seat. Bonnie opened the driver's door and Caroline rushed towards her stopping her from going inside.
"I'll drive" Caroline said with a gentle face. Bonnie nodded with sad eyes, opening the back door and resting Abby's head on her lap.
In the way home, Caroline didn't speak anything while Bonnie looked down at her mother, brushing some hairs from her face and crying in silence.
How could they? After everything she has done for him, after everything they have been through together, they still decided to kill her that easily? She cursed at herself inside for believing Damon was changing. For believing Stefan was the good one after all. She couldn't deal with the fact that she will always have to sacrifice everything for everyone and still don't get anything in return.
Damon was going to pay. She was going to give him hell.
Bonnie felt Caroline stopping the car and immediately knew they were at her house. She lift her mother's body a little, while Caroline got out of the car and opened the door, taking Abby's dead body carefully in her arms. Bonnie closed her eyes and took a deep and hurtful breath before going out of the car.
She looked at Caroline who was quiet with her mom is in her arms, looking at her worried. Bonnie blinked a couple of times before realizing the reason of Caroline's expression.
Elena was sitting in her porch. Along with the Salvatore's.
Bonnie closed her eyes one more time before heading to her house beside Caroline. Elena noticed her and quickly stood up cleaning some tears in the process.
"Bonnie" Elena murmured with a sob. Bonnie ignored her and searched for the keys in her pocket to open the door. "Bonnie, please" Elena insisted.
Bonnie took out the keys and managed to open the door but her shaking hands wouldn't let her. She dropped the keys to the floor in frustration letting a big growl come out of her mouth.
In seconds, Caroline was at her side trying to get the keys from the floor. Bonnie looked at her mother's face and the tears approached her eyes.
"Bonnie, please look at me" Elena said one more time. Bonnie closed her eyes clenching her teeth before facing Elena.
"What do you want Elena?" Bonnie asked in a yell. Elena started to cry.
"I'm so sorry Bonnie. You have no idea how much I-" Bonnie interrupted her tired of the shit coming out of her mouth.
"How much you, what? How bad you feel? How sorry you are?" Bonnie replied with a loud voice. "Don't expect me to believe that Elena"
"I do Bonnie. Please don't be like this with me" Elena stated with hurt eyes.
"What do you expect me to believe, Elena? That you actually feel that bad about me? Please, just watching how you still are able to be near of this two" Bonnie said to Elena looking at Damon and Stefan from behind her, "shows me how little you care about me"
"Don't be unfair Bonnie, you are my best friend! How can you think I don't care about you?" Elena yelled back at her looking hurt. Poor little Elena. She always had to be right. Bad thing Bonnie was not in the mood for Elena.
"How am I being unfair? My mother was fucking turned into a vampire Elena just because of your safety. I'm not blaming you for that because there are obviously people deciding for you but everything I do Elena is for you! My grandmother died trying to help these two" Bonnie stated with cloudy eyes, "I was willing to die for you Elena and I'm still are. How am I being unfair with you when I would do anything to keep you alive?"
"Bonnie, I didn't-"
"Shut up Elena" Bonnie interrupted hissing "It's my turn to talk because I never get to talk"
"Look Bonnie, I get why you're mad but-", Stefan said from behind but quickly was interrupted by a heavy aneurysm.
Elena quickly ran towards him, helping him to stand up. Damon looked at his brother and walked towards Bonnie.
"Bonnie…" Damon said with a soft voice. "What I did was awful but it was the only choice we had. If I didn't kill one of you, Elena would have died and-"
"Shut up!" Bonnie yelled at him punching him hard in the face and throwing him out of the porch. She stopped the aneurysm on Stefan.
"You don't get to tell me how to feel. You don't get me how to act. You don't fucking get to tell me what to do! All I do is for you, all of you and here you are trying to make me realize it was all for a good reason! It was for selfish reason because you Elena, you didn't want to get Elijah killed. Yes! The same one that suggested to killed me and my mother. How do you feel now? Do you feel ok about that?" Bonnie looked straight to Elena while tears rolled down her face "I'm your friend Elena, How could you? How can you? All I do is selfless from my part and I don't expect anything from you in return but you… you don't value me as a person" Bonnie confessed feeling a heavy weight getting off her chest.
She was finally confessing all she always wanted to say. She looked at Stefan and Damon "You wanna know what makes me sadder? Do you want to know what hurts me the most? That after all that have happen, after all of this, after all we have being through together, after all those years of friendship, you will always still choose them over me. You will always choose them over everything"
Elena covered her mouth while she cried hard. Stefan was almost hugging her from the waist, looking the hurt on his angel's face.
Bonnie continued, "They turned my mother, Elena. All she wanted was to be normal again and the only reason she was there in the first place was because she wanted to be there for me, because she wanted to help me. Don't you see how guilty I feel about this? Because is always my fault! Everyone critics my acts! I'm not perfect, I'm just human. I'm only 17 years old. I'm just starting my life. And now, now I lost everything. Because my mother is a vampire! She will hate herself for the rest of her life and you all are just good with it. You all are just good because Stefan is getting better and Damon is finally getting his shit together so hey! Let's celebrate! How gives a damn about Bonnie's mother? Who gives a damn about Bonnie Bennett? No one! Because all is about Elena! Because Bonnie's just the resident witch who only gets called when they need something from her! So, who cares?" Bonnie was crying so hard right now that she had to rest her body in the door. Her heart was so broken but at the same time so relieved, that gave her the strength to be able to talk
"Who cares about me Elena? No one! I'm no one first choice! My father prefers his job over me. You choose them over me. And all of you have someone who choice you over everyone else. But I don't… The only person who cared enough for me was my Grams and she's gone. And now my mother is back and I don't get to have a nice time with her for 5 minutes before some bloodsucker douche bad turns her into a vampire all because is the right thing to do. How can I live like this now? I have being alone all of this time. I had to face all of those things alone. You were never there! And I'm not some slave you can relay on to do the dirty work! Didn't you never thought on my feelings? I'm still young, I'm still a girl and I have to deal with this. ALONE!"
Bonnie looked at Stefan who had a sad expression in his face, while Caroline was sobbing silently with her mother still on her arms. Elena was crying like she always did when things got serious and Damon, she didn't know how she was able to look at him. He was resting in one of the stairs looking at her in realization. She got from the look in his face that Damon finally understood her.
"Don't expect me to believe you're sorry when you're clearly still on their side" Bonnie commented cleaning her tears with her sleeve, feeling a bit better "And you…" Bonnie looked at Damon and Stefan. "You don't even think in coming to me when you need help. I'm done with you two"
Bonnie took the keys from the floor and opened the door.
Caroline walked inside and rested Abby in the couch carefully. Once she was done, she looked back at Bonnie who was still outside looking at Elena.
"I love you Elena. So much. You know I will always do anything for you" Bonnie said while Elena walked towards her, "But I need a break from you. I need to feel safe. I need to feel loved. I need to feel what is like to be ok. And with you… I'm sorry Elena, but with you I don't feel that. I don't think I'll ever feel it" she backed off from Elena and looked at Stefan.
"There is good in you Stefan. I know that. But there's also evil. And you need to realize that you don't have to bury it to be a better man. You just have to accept it. Otherwise you'll always hate yourself" Bonnie commented peaceful for a minute to Stefan. Stefan looked at her nodding finally letting the hurt be expressed. He started to cry.
She looked at Damon with so much hate. Because it hurt her the most that Damon would have been the one who made it.
"I thought we were closer than that. I thought you had change. It's so stupid to think I never expected this from you after all. But that's me, I'm stupid enough to think people care about me. I don't know if you'll ever change. I don't know if you will ever feel ok with yourself. But the only thing I know the most about you know Damon…" Bonnie stated turning around fully to face Damon, who was standing in front of her now.
"Is that I cared about you. More than you could ever know. And it's sad to say that tonight… tonight you died for me forever. You've lost me in every way possible" Bonnie cloudy eyes looked for the last time to Damon, who was looking down, not able to face her because she knew that Damon would've cried too. She scoffed at the fact that she knew Damon more than Elena could ever do.
But she didn't need to worry about that.
From the first time in a long time, she would live her life. She would try to be happy. Even if it was for a short time.
"Goodbye Elena" Bonnie whispered at her before walking inside the house.
Elena was still crying. She walked towards Damon and put a hand on his arm but he quickly back off from her touch.
"Stay away from me" Damon said to Elena. Elena looked at him hurt and watched how Damon walked away from her and Stefan and disappeared between the shadows of the trees.
Elena looked back at Stefan and he just gave her a slight smile before walking away from her too.
And in that moment, Elena finally understood what it felt like to be alone. She finally understood how Bonnie felt all this time. She embraced herself sobbing while walking away from Bonnie's house, wishing everything could be as it was before.
Bonnie sat beside Caroline breathing slowly. Caroline looked at her and started crying.
"I love you Bonnie" she said "I will never leave you alone again. Ever"
Bonnie smiled at her with sad eyes and rested her head in Caroline's shoulder letting the tears come out again.
"Would you help me?" Bonnie asked her.
"Always" Caroline replied "I will always be here for you"
"Thanks" Bonnie said as Caroline took Bonnie's hand in hers and kissed her hair.
They stayed for a moment like that before they heard Abby's body sit in a rush in the couch, gasping for air.
"Mom" Bonnie cried running towards her along with Caroline.
"Oh my god" Abby cried while Bonnie hugged her crying.
"I'll help. We'll help" Bonnie said.
A/N: Thanks for reading. I feel much better after writing this although I'm still in tears after 4 hours of acknowledge of this. That's how much I love my babe.