She Misses Him, a yu yu hakusho fanfic

She Misses Him song by

She Misses Him
song by: Tim Rushlow
songfic by NemKess

"Yukina?" The petite Koorime turned to smile sadly at her brother. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, Oniichan. I was just thinking."

Hiei frowned but said nothing as he settled down next to her. He didn't need to use his jagan to know that something was bothering her. He'd been picking up her sadness all the way from the Makai for the last few months. Kurama had finally gotten tired of his constant worrying and all but threw him out of their den, telling him not to come back until everything was calm and settled.

"Yukina..." His voice faltered and his eyes widened when she threw her arms around him and began to sob into his neck.

"Why do humans have to be so frail, Oniichan?"

Her sobs cut him to the bone and he hesitantly wrapped his own arms around her shoulders. "What is it, Yukina?"

"Ka... Kazu..."

"Something happened to Kuwabara?"

She shook her head and stood suddenly. With soul weary eyes she helped him stand as well and turned to lead him to the home she shared with her husband.

(She shaves his face, She combs his hair
She helps him find his rocking chair
She wipes his mouth
and the window that he's looking out
She reads him books, She speaks his name
Oh every day is much the same
She sighs that sigh, From deep within
The one that says, she misses him)

Hiei was shocked. The 'Mighty' Kuwabara Kazuma did not seem so mighty now. He sat in a rocking chair next to a window, looking out at the city. The last few years had not been kind.

"Kazuma? Hiei is here to visit." The gray head turned to stare at her with a blank expression. For a moment, he seemed to be trying to place who she was.

"Yukina," he rasped in greeting before turning his attention to the dark figure next to her. There was no recognition in his eyes. After a moment he turned back to his wife, a questioning brow raised.

"My brother, Kazu."

The big man nodded but his expression never really changed. It was obvious he still had no clue who their visitor was, but was willing to accept Yukina's words.

A squirrel outside the window distracted him and he turned away from them to watch it play.

Yukina led Hiei away.

"What's wrong with him?" He'd watched Kurama's human body go through many of the same physical changes but never had his mate's mental facilities been affected.

The dainty ice maiden used the edge of her kimono to wipe the moisture from the corner of her eyes. "When I couldn't heal him, Yusuke and I took him to a ningen hospital. The doctor called it Alzheimer's Disease. It attacks a ningen's brain. It makes him forget things. It was little at first, he wouldn't remember what he was supposed to be doing or where he was going. Then it just got worse. The last time Yusuke came to visit, Kazuma didn't know who he was either. The reason he sits in the chair all day is because he can't find his way around the house."

"Can they do anything for him?"

She just shook her head. "They want to move into a care facility for patients. The doctor said it would be easier for the family not to have the strain of the care he would require once the disease reached it's final stage." Her fists clinched and her face looked almost savage for a moment. "I've been to the place. I won't let them take away his dignity like that, Oniichan, I won't." Her face crumbled again and Hiei stepped forward to embrace her again as the tears fell freely. "I won't."

(She misses his gentle touch
And the way he used to make her laugh
She misses the man he was
In all of those old photographs
So strong, So kind
So sweet, So smart
The man who stole her very heart
She misses him)

Kuwabara Kazuma, he thought. That's my name. Kazuma Kuwabara. His face showed his frustration as he looked away from his reflection in the mirror to study the picture in his hand. There were other people in the photo, people he should have known. One of them was his wife, he knew that.

A smile appeared. She was as beautiful now as she was in the picture. She didn't seem to have aged at all. The others... The one had visited earlier, he remembered that. What had Yukina called him? He stared at the scowling face in the photo for another moment before giving up and moving on to the next face. This one came by regularly. Yu something or another, he thought. The redhead... Hmm.. Kurama. The blue haired girl wasn't human, he was sure, but couldn't really remember what she had been. The mousy looking one.. He couldn't remember her name, but he did know that she was already dead.

It was getting much harder to even recall those few bits that he could pull up. The visits from those in the photos helped sometimes, but usually it just left him irritated that he couldn't instantly remember who they all were, especially when it was obvious that they remembered him.

Why had the fates chosen to rob him of his looks and memories and not them? Why did he look as if he had one foot in the grave while they were all as vibrant as the day the photo had been taken? It just didn't seem fair.

(His children come
On Saturday
There at his feet his grandkids play
It's sad they don't
Know Him at all
He's just the one they call 'grandpa'
They take out his trash
They mow his lawn
Things he can't do since he's been gone
She's grateful that
They're pitchin in
And like everyone
She misses him)

"Obassan?" Yukina smiled at her grandson as he entered the room and moved towards her. The boy was so helpful, spending his weekends helping around their home rather than off doing whatever it was teenagers did these days.

"Yes, Kioshi?"

He seemed to hesitate for a moment, before steeling himself. "May I ask you a personal question?"

She looked up at him in surprise. Of all their grandchildren, Kioshi was the one most like her. Not only was he more youkai than human, he also inherited her calm, quiet manner. And he almost never asked personal questions. Of course, he was getting older now, she supposed it was only natural. "Of course. What would you like to know?"

He paused and gathered his thoughts. "Why do you stay with Ojiisan? Most of the time he isn't even aware that we're here anyways."

Tears began to fill her eyes once more, but thankfully, none crystallized and fell this time. How to explain such a thing? Although he was getting older, her grandson had little experience with love. She knew from her son that he seldom even dated, let alone was actually serious about anyone. She smiled fondly. Kazuma had been a great deal younger than Kioshi when she had fallen in love with him and he with her.

Walking over to the window where her husband had been sitting earlier, she glanced out to make sure he was still sitting outside feeding the birds. A lone photograph caught her attention from where it had been sat in the sill.

It seemed a lifetime ago that it had been taken.

It ~was~ a lifetime ago. A human lifetime ago.

Back when the Urameshi team had been young and strong- ready to take on the world at a word. A chuckle escaped as the memories bubbled up in her mind. How she missed those days, even with the constant danger they had all faced.

Her gaze sought his form in the yard once again. On the other hand, she really wouldn't trade their life together for anything. Not even to take away the pain that filled her heart when the diseases effects left him so frustrated and angry or, as they had on more than one occasion, frightened.

"Oh, Kioshi... You don't know him like I do. You can't even begin to imagine what he was like before, the man that still shows sometimes." she sighed and sat the picture back down. "It may hurt now, watching him lose so much of himself, but I will never leave him. I will be by his side until his death and though we may be separated for a while, one day, we will be together again."

When he still looked confused and started to say something else, she held up one hand and smiled gently. "You'll understand when you find the one person that makes you complete."

Though he was obviously still skeptical, he merely bowed his head politely and went out to tend the garden.

(And yes they're still together
After all these years
But sometimes you can almost feel
The sadness in her tears)

Yukina sat down in the chair by the window and watched her husband. Her tears made soft pinging noises as they fell to the floor.

She would stay with him and she would always love him. But her words to Hiei that morning still rang true as well. Why did human beings have to be so fragile? When a man with as much pride and strength as Kazuma had always had was reduced to not recognizing pictures of himself and his family or even his own reflection in the mirror, she couldn't help but become a little angry and a lot sad.

His figure was completely blurred as her tears blinded her.

She couldn't help it. She missed him so much.