Chapter 1

TOBIAS POV

The initiates come in today. The faction system had to be reinstated since we could not maintain the peace. The bureau no longer controls the city. The government is no longer controlled by a single faction, rather, each faction has two representatives who, together, compose the Board. Amar and I represent Dauntless.

No Abnegation initiate, not that I expected any. She was unique. I still see her everywhere and in everything. I don't like to talk about her in the past tense, and I absolutely hate it when people who didn't really know Tris talk about her pretend to have.

A part of me died when she did.

Last week, Zeke got a hold of old security camera footage and printed a picture of her and I. There are no pictures of Tris, at least none that I know of. She didn't live long in Dauntless, and lived pictures were considered self-indulgent in Abnegation. She is beautiful in the picture. Her eyes shine, demanding attention as they did. Her smile was bright. It was taken the moment after the rankings were revealed, a little before we kissed.

Zeke and Christina have tried to set me up on a few dates, but I never went to them. Christina and I have become close friends; I guess that's what happens when you share grief with someone.

I miss her so much. I still wish I had one more kiss, one more word, one more glance. Just one more.

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TRIS POV

It's been three years since I was shot, three years since I've last seen Tobias, three years since he started thinking that I'm dead, and the Bureau started experimenting on me.

A lot has happened over the years. On the one time Tobias and I 'did it', I ended up getting pregnant. I had a little boy. Bringing a child up is hard. Especially when you have to do it alone. At first, I thought he didn't stand a chance. Me getting shot like that, in normal circumstances would have, by all chances, killed the fetus, but miraculously, he survived. Raising a child sounded impossible, especially because I had no parenting skills and the person who would make me believe I could do this, wasn't here. I'm not going to lie. It was hard and sometimes it still is.

The moment he was born I noticed that he looks exactly like my Tobias, that's why I named him Toby. He is now two years old and looks more like his father than ever. He has his smile, his deep sea blue eyes, his stick-out ears, his expressions are the same, and he is quite tall. The only thing he got from me is his hair: blonde and curly.

The bureau experiments on me almost every day. I am taken from my room before Toby wakes up, and taken to another one where they put me under different simulations, in which I constantly have to watch Tobias dying, or my son being taken away from me. If I refuse to go, I either get electrically shocked, beat up, or they refuse to give me and my son food, so eventually I stopped trying to escape from it and gave in. Sometimes I feel like I'm in Erudite again when I'm not under a simulation, Toby, and I stay locked up in the same bedroom the entire day. Bound to the same four walls. I've never left the bureau again and him, out to more than a few times from the room. The only real reason why I get to keep Toby is that the serum only starts to work after a certain age, and David wants to experiment on Toby too. Yes, David. The bureau created a serum to make him remember everything, and his goal now is quite clear: he wants to torture me until my death and later, when he is older, experiment on Toby too. I will never let them hurt him; I would lose the last thing that matters to me, so I stay strong and keep fighting. As for his divergence, he will probably be one, maybe even stronger than me.

I miss Tobias. I miss him from the time I get up to the time I go to sleep. The bureau told him that I'm gone. To this day, he believes I'm dead, and it kills me. I know one of his fears was my death. David told me he scattered "my ashes" while zip lining on the choosing ceremony day. He also told me that they pulled Uriah's plug. Sometimes I doubt that he is dead, others, that I'm crazy and just really wish he were alive. It aches to think about everything. I get up from the table, and press my lips to Toby's forehead gently giving him a light kiss so I don't wake him up. His ears stick out of the covers like his father's do when he sleeps. Looking at him is so bittersweet, but it's the only thing I have left of Tobias. I go to my bed and tuck myself in. As I close my eyes, thoughts fill my head. What if Tobias has moved on? What if he is with someone else?

If he has Indeed moved on, my heart will be broken, but at least I'll know he's happy.