Hannibal By Steven Moffat

by You are weird

Ever wondered what Hannibal would be like if it was poorly written, boring, lacking diversity as well as female characters? Well, you don't, but I wrote this so you better read it.

Jack Crawford, a white guy, was talking to Hannibal Lecter, a white American, about the complicated and plot-less murders that had been taking place.

"Shut up Jack I am a high functioning sociopath"-even though he is not even a sociopath what the fuck.

Then Beverly Kats, a white woman with no Asian descendants, went to talk to Jimmy Price, a straight white guy, about the murders. But because she is a woman and obviously cannot think for herself, she just stood there looking pretty and personality-less in the sunlight while Jimmy explained in full detail the unnecessarily complicated murders.

Alan Bloom walked in with Will Graham. Both straight white men, but they looked into each others eyes for a while to get queer people's money-and it worked, because in comes Margo verger-an undeveloped personality-less female. She was a total lesbian but then in came Freddie Louds, a white guy, to save her of homosexuality. Also Mason verger wasn't there at all because well-developed plot lines and complicated characters with background like literally everyone on Hannibal are a total no-no when you're Steven Moffat.