Disclaimer: I don't own or profit from this.

Summary: He did this for Sam and he's darn proud. Tag to 'No Rest for the Wicked' 3x16. No pairings.

A/N: Sorry for this poor excuse of a story but I couldn't get it out of my head. Let me know what you think (even if it is to tell me how horrible it is).

SPN SPN SPN

"Aren't you scared Dean?"

Looking over he saw Sam watching him through his shaggy brown bangs. They were speeding towards New Harmony to find Lilith, kill the damn bitch. End his deal.

"Why would I be scared Sammy?" He asked as he pushed the pedal a little harder to drive through the hellhound staring back at him in the middle of the road.

"Why would I be scared Sammy," Sam mocked besides him , "I don't know Dean maybe because your deal is due in like twelve hours or maybe because we're facing off with Lilith? Any of those good enough reasons for you?"

"Wow way to be a downer Sammy boy." He joked punching his brother playfully on the shoulder.

"What the hell man; you think this is some kind of joke? You're seeing things. Lilith has your deal and if we don't get her in time you're going to Hell!" Sam screamed at him from the passenger seat.

Turning to look at his brother he found his face twisting and bending itself into the disgusting face of a demon. Taking a deep breath in and looking back out the windshield he waited until he was sure the hallucination was done and looked back at his brother, "I fucked up man and now I have to deal with the consequences of my decisions." Seeing that Sam wasn't going to let up he added, "Get some sleep Sam. I'll wake you up when we get there."

He heard his brother huff and the rustle of his jacket soon followed by the soft snoring coming from the passenger seat.

It was quiet for a couple of hours as he watched cars pass by and soon he couldn't take it anymore. Steering on to the gravel shoulder of the rural highway he pulled the Impala, his baby, to the side and turned to face his baby brother.

Reaching over he ran a hand gently down the side of his fair skin and let a single tear run down his own cheek.

Taking a deep breath he started the car again and listened as she purred back onto the road. He smiled as she chewed up the pavement beneath them. He could almost get himself to pretend this wasn't any different than any other case he and Sam had worked in the past. No different than the Wendigo in Black Water Ridge two years ago, Hell's Gates last year, damn it even the Shritga case in Wisconsin. He and Sam were going to go in and take down the demon bitch and he wasn't going to go to Hell. He had to believe he wasn't going to Hell, he didn't deserve to go.

"I'm sorry Sammy."

He wasn't sorry Sam was alive because he fucking wasn't! Sam deserved to live, get out of this life, deserved to get a girl and forget about him. Dean wasn't worth remembering, he did what he was meant to, protect your brother Dean, he did and now he was paying the price.

Tightening the grip on the wheel he looked to his scarred, crooked fingers and saw bloodless knuckles clenching back.

Frowning he decided one thing. He was going to put on a brave face and he was going to white knuckle his way through this motherfucker. He's fucking scared but he isn't going to tell Sammy that. He's going to go out swinging and even if he does go to Hell because of Lilith he isn't going to regret a single minute of it.

He did this for Sam and he's damn proud.

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