A/N: Oh the irony, publishing a new story when I never update my other ones. Eh, well this first chapter is short.

DISCLAIMER: I'm not even going to dignify this with a response... *shakes head sadly* Why do you mock me so...

The stars that night were dimmer than they had ever been before, almost nonexistent in the inky black sky. The moon, normally a bright beacon to lost souls everywhere, was hidden behind clouds that could not be seen, melding its safe haven of soft yellow glow into a never ending chasm of darkness. Black painted the skies and the land, seeping into the depths of every living thing. The silence was overwhelming. The tension so thick, someone could cut it with a knife. It was perfect. They had been waiting for this night for a very long time.

He sat quietly and as still as possible on the branch, high above the distant ground. It was a quiet night, save for the variety of calls courtesy of the local fauna. Somewhere in the distance a dog was barking madly, probably having spotted a stray cat balancing along the rooftops. But this did not disturb his concentration.

'C'mon, just a bit more!' he thought to himself, an arms length away from his current goal.

Leaning ever so slightly forward on the thick arm of the tree, he increased his concentration tenfold, not even noticing the spindly twig crack somewhere above his head. He squinted his eyes and a vein throbbed at his temple, straining his mind to only focus on the one thing before him. He was probably going to burst a blood vessel if he didn't take a breather, but he figured if he willed it with his mind then it would happen. Maybe.

'C'mon, take your clothes off…' he thought over and over in his mind, concentrating every possible part of his brain on the man in front of him. Well, maybe not all of his mind. Enough, though, that he didn't hear the giggle above him and the rustle of leaves.

There were other thoughts accompanying his main focus of concentration, but none that he was willing to share with anyone, like what he wanted to do to that stoic noble before him. Oh what he could do to that lithe body, that milky white skin, sitting between those long sensuous legs and- 'YES, YES, YES!' his mind screamed as the noble reached up to loosen the collar of his shirt, revealing just a small part of that satiny, porcelain neck. Now if only he would take off the-

"Oh you dirty, dirty boy!" a scolding voice rang out from behind him, dripping with amusement, accompanying a whack upside the head.

"What the-!" His arms pin-wheeled as he tried to regain his balance, his perch on the branch slowly slipping out from beneath his feet as the distant ground got oh so much closer.

THUD.

"Goddamnit!" he yelled up from his new position on the ground, freshly fallen autumn leaves littering his fiery red hair and crunching under his body as he moved.

The other man chuckled heartily at the other's misfortune from his high up perch in the tree, twirling his infamous cane in one pale hand.

"Ah, Renji. I see you still have a lot to learn about the art of mind control, and detection as well it seems," he said, grinning widely at the last part.

Renji jumped up and was back in the tree in a second flat, making a snatch at that damn stick the other loved to carry around with him. But the other man was too fast and was already on another branch in the tree before he had even finished closing his hand around the air where the cane used to be.

"Damnit, Urahara! What the hell was that for?!" Renji griped, rubbing the back of his sore head where he had been thwacked.

The blonde man simply grinned widely in response. "I would give a thousand dollars for your thoughts Red, that has got to be the best porno ever!"

Renji gaped at him. "How did you- I mean, that is disgusting!" A red tint was coloring his cheeks, almost the same color as the braid that ran to between his shoulder blades. "I would never think such things!" he yelled angrily, his temper rising at the thought of the old man knowing his little hobby.

Urahara gave him a knowing wink. "~Suuuuuure," he said, drawing out the word like there would never be an ending to it.

Renji glowered at him. "You're one to talk, ya old goat! You and your fascination with that one chick over in the next county!"

The blonde's grin faltered ever so slightly. "Hmm, yes. I had forgotten about that… I will admit that I was observing Miss Shiouin, but that was simply to make sure that no one else got to taste her before I did."

"You say that like it's a past tense thing."

"Well, surely it is," Urahara continued, his white teeth glistening in the moonlight. "Like I said, simply observing her just so that no one else got to her before I did," he finished, waving his cane in the red head's direction.

This made Renji laugh. They both knew it wasn't even necessary for the blonde to lift a finger if he wanted something. All he had to do was look at someone in a certain way and everything he had ever wanted was at his feet. Lucky bastard.

This time it was Renji's turn to mock the other, drawling out a, "~Suuuuuure," with the same condescending tone. A glint of some unknown emotion passed through the light grey eyes of Urahara, but he didn't say anything, just kept smiling.

Renji glanced back over at his current object of obsession, but the commotion outside had yet to catch his attention, either that or he was good at pretending. Hopefully it was the first one.

With a sigh, the red head slid down the trunk of the tree and started to make his way back to the Hollow, not wanting to hang around with Urahara anymore.

"Oh ho! Don't let my little interruption stop you from your peeping, you Tom you," the elder called from the tree, a grin spreading itself back across his face.

Without even turning around, Renji flipped him the bird and kept on walking, calling over his shoulder, "Fuck you, ya old goat."

"Love you too, dear," Urahara replied, an amused grin plastered on his face as he watched Renji's retreating back, unnaturally white teeth glistening as he turned his mischievous gaze on the man that the other had been watching. "Love you too."

A/N: So yeah. Confusion? If so, just post your question in a review/PM me. Again, first chapter was short, but it will be longer next time! And it was kind of just a set up for the story. If you love me, and if you ever wanna see this get updated, reviews are appreciated(necessary). X3

(P.S. there was an amazing zombie here that would eat your soul if you didn't review, but sadly he wouldn't save to the document....)

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