This is just a total crack fic done in honour of me actually mentally corrupting my friend with Avengers slash while generally RPing... Lol. (Obviously she's Steve and I'm Bruce! Lol.)
Technically this is my second Avengers fanfic bit seeing as Ive had to re-write the ending of my actual first one (which is a rather raunchy little Tony/Hulk piece, If that gives some indication of the kind of the sorta stuff I USUALY write... Lol.) I'm kinda just posting this one first... Lol.
Hope I did okay on this. Lol. It's short and it's utterly totally and completely random! But it's supposed to be! Lol. Call it my 'light writing' for the week...! Lol.
Also, I completely wrote and posted this on my iPhone so if there's any spelling/gramma mistakes blame autocorrect! Lol.
It's rated mostly for some guy/guy kissing and lewd-ish suggestiveness cos y'know, some people might get offended by that... Lol.
***000***
How Bruce Banner Corrupted Captain America...
Bruce grinned rather ferraly as he pushed Steve down the hall, herding him into a room and it reminded Steve just a little bit too much of the Hulk when Steve had told him to smash things... Like Bruce was enjoying this just a little bit TOO much...
The physicist sat him down, forcefully in a chair and grinned again and Steve was pretty sure he was about to get a lot more than he'd bargained for when he'd told Bruce to 'do his worst because no one can corrupt Captain America...'
Bruce had just grinned his 'Hulk grin' as Steve had dubbed it and dragged him off up the hall... Steve was now pretty sure he was going to regret ever having challenged him on this matter. Banner was dating Tony Stark, after all...
Bruce locked the door behind them, using his insanely long passcode to override the system so that Steve was officially stuck with him and whatever insane idea he had come up with and now Steve was getting REALLY worried.
"Stay." Bruce demanded in a tone that suggested he was only saying it to make him nervous. It was working. They were both perfectly aware that Steve couldn't actually go anywhere if he tried...
Bruce disappeared for a moment then returned with a laptop which he turned on and tapped out a few commands into before plonking it on Steve's lap and moving to stand behind him which, in hindsight Steve should have entirely worried about if Bruce's insane grin was anything to go by (which it was) as a few seconds later Steve heard a click and felt something settle around his wrists and when the hell had Bruce pulled his arms behind him...? More to the point, how the hell had he done it without Steve noticing...? Steve gave an experimental pull but there was no give.
"Don't bother." Bruce said, clearly still grinning. "They're semi Hulk-proof. Tony designed them for holding crazy-ass strong super villains and Thor and I both tested them... He couldn't break out..." He left that sentence hanging then said smugly; "Have fun." Before giving Steve one last shit-eating grin and leaving the room.
Steve knew he was in deep shit when the laptop Banner had left him with started running through the selected files all on its own... Steve tried not to look, he really did but in the end his curiosity (damn it to hell!) had got the better of him. He looked. And then he tried to not look... And ended up looking again anyway because, 'really, Banner?'
Steve was... Horrified, confused and curious all at the same time. It was like a car crash; he wanted so badly to be able to just look away but for some reason he just couldn't.
Across the little screen a few seconds apart (long enough for an unfortunate Steve to be able to remember ever little detail in vivid colour due to his photographic memory...) flashed a host of drawings and sketches, apparently done by 'fans of the Avengers' and oh, dear god! Did people really think they did that!?
It didn't surprise Steve that Bruce would actually know about this, he was pretty sure Tony would've googled himself the minute the Avengers went global and, because he was Tony, he would have looked up the rest of them too and then promptly told Bruce to amuse him...
No, what surprised him was the fact that Banner didn't seem at all bothered by the fact that people apparently seemed to believe that he was 'fonduing' as the Hulk... With his team mates... With... Steve, apparently...
"Oh, dear god, Banner! That is just... Wrong! On so many levels!" Steve cried, shuddering, now wondering, against his best judgement, exactly what the Hulk might think about all this if he ever saw it...? Now Steve was actually worried about what really went through the big guys head because, really, he wasn't so much different from Banner and why on earth did he get the feeling that Stark would absolutely try to do that...!? Now he was stuck wondering what really went on in those 'training sessions' between Tony and the Hulk and dear god! He should NOT be wondering these things about his team mates!
Apparently the blows to his virtue weren't over yet, because now to make matters worse there was now a whole host of images, not just of him and Banner but of himself, Banner AND Stark! Apparently people even had a NAME for them! Banner had included some images with the inscription 'StarkSpangledBanner' beneath them and oh, god! He was never going to be able to look at Stark OR Banner the same way again and he was most definitely going to be deleting that song from his playlist...
Just when Steve thought he could no longer be shocked by anything; Thor and... Loki!? If it were possible Steve would have chosen that moment to go into a dead faint of utter and total shock and embarrassment..
***000***
"Hey Brucey! What's up?" Tony greeted him enthusiastically in the kitchen and Bruce just grinned some more and said; "Two words; Steve. Internet."
Tony literally burst out laughing at that. "You didn't!? Oh my god, you did!" Tony grabbed Bruce firmly by the jacket and dragged him forward to kiss him fiercely, his tongue sliding into his mouth and playing against Bruce's own for a minute before he pulled back, saying; "I bloody love you, you know that! I hope you positioned him in front of a camera! I wanna see the horrified look on his face when he gets to the good stuff!"
"I chained him to a chair in the den and locked the door..."
"Hah!"
"I also took the liberty of throwing in some of your security footage..."
"I can't believe you ! You're gonna kill the poor guy with embarrassment! That was supposed to be MY job!"
Bruce shook his head, smiling. "Sorry... He said and I quote; 'nothing can ever corrupt me, I'm Captain America.' So I set out to prove him wrong."
"You realise it doesn't count if he doesn't admit it...?"
"He will." Bruce said, utterly convinced of this fact and Tony started laughing again at the thought of poor Steve stuck down there with the contents of his and Bruce's laptop...
***000***
Steve was quite literally ready to curl up and die of embarrassment. Bruce must have picked the worst possible things to throw at him and now, to make matters worse, there was a ream of clips from what could only be Tony's actual security footage around the mansion...
Apparently the general public weren't actually too far off with their assumptions because Stark had managed to catch not only himself and Banner (though probably deliberately) engaging in VERY inappropriate uses of lab equipment and Tony's robots but also Thor and his brother, (adopted! Steve reminded himself) defiling the pool table and various walls and hallways and why the heck could they not just use a bed!?
There was also two random clips that Steve figured must have been total flukes, firstly of Clint Barton and Agent Coulson kissing on the couch when they apparently thought no one was looking and Agent Romanov and Tony's secretary Pepper doing the same thing on the same couch but probably on a different day...
Now he was wondering how he could possibly be the only one in the tower to NOT know about this!? Sure, he and Bucky had a 'thing' back in the forties but at least they were quiet about it... And the thought of him with... No! He was not going to think about it! He would. Not. Think. It.
Steve gave a plaintive wail and squirmed in his chair, trying to get free and failing as he consciously already knew he would but his self-preserving subconscious still wouldn't quite give up on the idea of escape...
"Banner...!?" He tried, hoping that maybe Bruce was watching the cameras live-feed and could actually hear him... "Bruce...!?" He tried again. "You can let me out now! Banner...!?"
Steve groaned loudly, guessing he wasn't getting saved any time soon and hung his head in resignation. He was about to entirely give up hope of getting out of here half sane when the door clicked open and Bruce walked back in with a shit-eating grin on his face and Stark in tow. Steve groaned again because he just KNEW what they'd been up to and he also knew that Stark would never let him live this down... Ever!
"Hey, Capsicle! Brucey-babes traumatised you enough yet? Or do you wanna see the rest of the footage that I politely-for-the-sake-of-the-others didn't include in there...?"
"For the love of god, no!" Steve yelled, quickly because he could see the completely evil gleam in Starks eyes as he said that and Steve had the feeling he REALLY didn't want to see what was on that footage...
Steve took a deep breath then said the one thing he knew that Bruce wanted to hear; "Bruce... I think you can officially add 'mentally corrupted Captain America' to your list of achievements..."
Bruce smirked victoriously and moved to undo the cuffs around his wrists and Steve grabbed a piece of paper off the desk in the room and started scribbling. He handed it to Bruce a moment later, ducking his head and walking out of the room VERY quickly his face flushed bright red.
Bruce looked down and smirked again, handing it to Tony to read who started laughing his head off at the neatly printed words on the page below which was Steve's signature: 'Doctor Bruce Banner is the official corrupter of Captain America... Despite what Tony Stark may say.'
Tony snorted with laughter and Bruce carefully and neatly folded it before putting it in his pocket. "I'm gonna frame it..." Bruce said, smiling and pulling Tony towards him and Tony slung an arm round his shoulder and kissed him, briefly before they both sauntered out of the room to go and find Bruce a frame...
***000***