Just to see you
.
I have a shop that I often frequent. It's a little ways away from where I live, so just going out of my way to come here is a bit of a pain. I stumbled upon it on my way home from school. I just wanted to take a different route. Of course, I had google maps on my side, just in case I got lost. I just never would have thought that there'd be a small café hidden away in a quiet suburban area.
The shop's exterior was adorned with flowers, often tended to by the employees. The flowers are all a variety of lilies, carnations and baby breath (I would know, one of the employees told me). At first glance, you'd most likely guess that the shop is a florist. But it's not. And I'm glad it's not. You can't really sit down at a florist with a cup of coffee for hours on end doing nothing. But you can at a café.
I try my best not to come here every day after school. Even though I want to, I try not to. I spread out my days in the week. I make my visits irregular so she doesn't get suspicious. That way, I can come on the weekends and spend even longer here.
The atmosphere is different depending on what time of the day you come, but the people don't change and the coffee is great whenever. I like to get myself a mocha and sit in the corner of the shop by the window. I can see the whole shop from this seat. I like to watch out the window too. I didn't know I enjoyed watching the sky turn from blue to the evening sunset.
I remember this one time I went on a holiday with my family to a small island. We stayed in a three-story house. It was a building unlike anything I had ever seen. Bedrooms on the first floor, kitchen, dining and more rooms on the second, and then even more rooms on the third floor. I stayed on the third floor because it had the best view. I woke up the next morning in an unfamiliar place at maybe four in the morning. No one else was awake and the sky was only just beginning to shift from the remnants of night into dawn. I could still see the moon in the sky and some stars. From my bed, I just watched the sky transform from out the glass doors that led to the balcony. It was such a surreal and serene moment that even now I can't forget it, even though it had been ten years since then.
It was like the sky was pulsating from its centre, or like how droplets fall into water, sending out ripples along its surface. There was colour falling into the sky and softly rippling along the rest of the world. Sending out subtly brighter shades of the sky to transform its colour. It was marvelling and magical.
Every time I come here, I say it's because it's easier to study here. But that's a lie. I can't study here at all.
Even though she's an adult, she's ridiculously clumsy, yet she never fails to make the perfect cup of coffee. She bumps into every second table and probably has about a dozen burns from spilt beverages. She always serves it with a smile and she even makes small talk to humour the customers. Except she's not humouring them. She's talking to them because she wants to. I sometimes selfishly wish that it was just me she talked to like that; but I can't help thinking that watching her happily chat with others is a nice feeling too.
I still like it best when she's smiling at me.
She wears her hair in a high ponytail. Blonde locks sometimes falling over her shoulder. She has her nails painted a soft shade of pink. It really compliments her fair skin. She wears her black apron around her waist. It's a bit too fitting to her figure.
I've never seen her in anything but her uniform, and I'm not sure I ever will.
This is how every visit is. Me in the corner, sipping at a mocha, her working and making small talk. And today was no exception.
She strides over to my table, a small chocolate dessert in hand. I look at her and then to the plate, puzzled. She just offers me a small grin and I don't ask questions. She places the dessert down in front of me and as she does so, the small golden ring on her left-hand sparkles in the sun.
"Why?" I ask.
"Because you're a regular and I thought a little pick-me-up might do you some good after all that studying." Except I'm only pretending to study. I can't possibly study when she's here. And she's always here.
It's like the air leaves my lungs but I don't let it show. I can feel my heart throbbing throughout my entire body. She's never done this before, and I've never seen her do this for any other customer. I'm not going to hope for anything, but it's okay to be happy by this, right? "Thank you, Lucy." As cheesy as it sounds, I think I feel like giggling.
She throws a playful wink my way and tucks some of the longer strands of her fringe behind her ear, her ring glistening in the sun again. I stare at it, a longing welling up inside of me.
"Planned the wedding yet?" I ask. I don't want to stop talking to her just yet.
"Hm?" She's confused by the sudden shift in topic, so I point to her left-hand. She chuckles sheepishly, seeming to have had an 'oh, of course!' moment. "Not yet, but my fiancée and I have a few venue ideas we're fond of! We don't want anything fancy, but we thought that a nice park or even closing the café for a day sounded good."
I smile at her, happy because she's happy too. "That sounds awesome. Why the café?"
"Well, Natsu and I were going to take it over from my parents and run it together. We were thinking that having our ceremony here would be a wonderful way to represent a fresh start, for both our married and working lives."
"So it's more of a sentimental thing."
"Yeah," she beams. She's excited for the future.
Sometimes, I wish I had been born a little earlier. Maybe then she'd look my way, even slightly. I remember when she had first met her fiancée. She was gushing and acted more like a high schooler than me. But she had looked so happy then, and she looks even happier now. She's just as in love with him now than she was when they first met, maybe even more. All those ups and downs she had with him, she shared with me, so unbelievably genuine about how she felt. She looked beautiful in every moment. It's already been two years, huh?
"Hey Gray," Lucy almost whispers.
"Yeah?"
"Do you… Do you think you'd come if we had the wedding here?" She asks hesitantly. I'm startled.
"You want me to come?"
"I'd love for you to come."
"Then I would also love to go." Guess I'll be seeing her in something other than her uniform.
It was heading into the evening, the buzz of customers filing in and out of the shop dying down. So Lucy and I sat together at the little table in the corner of the room by the window, reminiscing. We talked about our first meeting, awkward times, fun times, my dedication to this shop, her dedication this shop and lots of other little things. As long as these moments stay as ours in the future too, then I'll be alright.
I have a shop that I often frequent. It's a little ways away from where I live, so just going out of my way to come here is a bit of a pain. I don't mind though because I come just to see you. As long as you don't mind, I won't either.