Summary: Janeway and Seven are in a damaged shuttle where the Captain is injured.
Disclaimer: I own nothing of Star Trek Voyager.
Rating: T+
Pairing Janeway and Chakotay
RELIZATIONS:
DAMAGED SHUTTLE:
Janeway knew that she shouldn't have come on this mission, but her wounded pride and shattered heart pushed her to be reckless. She opened her eyes seeing red, pain sizzled over her right cheek, on her right eyebrow, and up her forehead culminating in a jagged laceration when she saw her reflection. Kathryn tried sitting up, but something was dug in deep at her side. Taking a deep breath, she assessed her injuries and came to the conclusion that it was only a flesh wound. Gathering her iron will, she reached behind her and pulled the shrapnel from her side. Kathryn snarled dropping the metal to the floor. "Seven..." She coughed.
Seven pushed a piece of bulkhead off of her taking stock of her body. She wasn't damaged, just bruised with minor abrasions. She sat up and saw a bloody shard of metal on the floor next to where the Captain was sitting. Slowly she got to her feet and went back to the co-pilots seat. "Captain?" Seven looked at Janeway's profile seeing the woman's face coated in blood. "How badly are you injured?" She asked trying to assess the Captain's injuries.
"I'm fine." Kathryn growled through the pain demanding her attention, but she would not fall prey to it. She was going to fix the shuttle and make it back to Voyager. Once back on her ship she would go to her quarters and wallow in her self pity that always chased away her pride and stubbornness. "Let's see what we can do about this shuttle." She snapped. Again, she kicked herself for coming out here with Seven, the woman he was dating the man who held Kathryn's heart. If she hadn't come on this mission, it would have been Chakotay. Kathryn couldn't handle that.
VOYAGER:
Chakotay sat in his command chair digging his fingers in the armrests while Harry scanned for their shuttle. It had been on its way back carrying Kathryn and Seven. He had been nervous since their departure. There had been a thick wall of tension between him and Kathryn for a few weeks and Chakotay didn't know what to do about it. There had been times that he thought he would talk to Seven, but everytime he stopped. And then that would lead him to wonder why he was even with Seven in the first place. 'Please, I beg you, bring her back to me.'Chakotay prayed to the spirits of his people.
"Commander," Harry had found the shuttle's distress beacon on long distance sensors. "I found them, they are at heading 246 mark 12." The crew tried not to notice how worried the commander was, how they all were.
Chakotay was out of his chair and going to the OPS station, he had to see for himself. "Tom, set a course." He ordered.
"Aye, aye Commander." Tom made no comments, he did his job. Setting the course, Tom engaged the engines.
SHUTTLE:
Kathryn was dizzy, she could hardly keep her eyes open as she tried to make repairs to the navigational systems. "Damnit!" She growled sounding like a Klingon. B'Elanna had worn off on her. With a sudden burst of anger Kathryn pounded her fist on the console and it lit up, working once more. "Violence does work." She muttered pleased. Maybe there were a few other systems she could beat up into working. It was worth a shot. The less time she had to be confined in a small space with Seven of Nine, the better Kathryn would be.
Seven sat by quietly trying not to say anything to the Captain. The last time she had told the Captain the best way to repair the navigational sensors the Captain had snapped at her. So, Seven sat silently repairing communications. She bypassed damaged connections, severed a few relays, and as quickly as she could communications were back online. "We have long range communications."
"Good." Kathryn acknowledged. Quickly her fingers tapped in a command but sparks exploded from the console making them both turn away. Kathryn had to twist, agony exploded over her right side again. "Fixed you said? Yeah, looks fixed."
Seven opened her mouth to reply but her eyes fell to the Captain's side as blood coated her ripped uniform. "You're injured." She stated.
"Thanks for stating the obvious." Kathryn sniped finally giving in and putting her hand to her freshly bleeding wound.
Seven said nothing. Instead she moved from the co-pilots seat to find the med kit. She tried removing it but it was wedged too tightly for her to remove it. "I can't free the med-kit."
"Don't worry about it." Kathryn said toning down her anger looking out the at the open space to see the sight of her ship. "Voyagers here." Kathryn used her left hand to activate her comm badge, "Janeway to Voyager."
"Voyager here."
Chakotay! Kathryn kept her face composed even as her heart skipped a beat. "We're here, Commander." She kept her voice controlled. A wave of pain washed through her, "We're in one piece." She looked at Seven and glared at the former borg to keep her mouth shut about her injuries.
"Are you able to pilot the shuttle into the bay?"
His voice was calm as he spoke to her. Kathryn's heart fell, "No," She gasped sharply, "Our engines are damaged, and we're dead in the water." Kathryn used an old navel term. She shook her head feeling the laceration to her face sting in pain. It gave her another burst of pain filled energy to keep her talking.
"Don't worry Captain, Paris will tractor you right in nice and easy."
"Never was commander." Kathryn said pressing her hand tighter against her wound to give her mind something else to focus on rather than feeling hurt over the calm tone Chakotay had spoken to her with. Was he really over her? Had she waited too long? What had she done?
BRIDGE:
Chakotay had to fight with himself to remain calm. Kathryn was safe as was Seven. His heart still called out for Kathryn. She was deeply ingrained in his life. He had been foolish to ever think that he could move on from her. Seven was sweet, innocent even, but she wasn't Kathryn. His Captain drew out his true self, a smile from him so bright that he could see her heart flutter every time. He had to go to her. "Tuvok you have the bridge. I'll be in the shuttle bay to greet the Captain."
"Understood Commander." Tuvok moved from the Tactical Station and down to sit in the Captain's chair. After seven years he knew better than to keep the Commander from the Captain.
Chakotay entered the turbo lift. "Shuttle bay." He ordered pacing back and forth.
SHUTTLE BAY:
Kathryn hobbled out of the damaged shuttle, her intention to slip out of the bay and make her way to sickbay for the Doctor to take a look at her, but he was there. Chakotay was standing right there with a look of pure relief on his face. 'It's not for me. That look is for Seven.' Kathryn scolded herself and forced herself to walk as if she wasn't hurt.
Chakotay saw Kathryn emerge from the shuttle and she was hurt. Her face was cut and smudged with dirt and her blood, but he was relieved because she was back on the ship. He walked to her noticing she was trying to hide her injuries, but she could never hide from him. Chakotay had to hold her even if she was hurt. Before he could change his mind he closed the distance between them and pulled her into his arm. She stiffened in his arms for a second and then she relaxed. "Oh, Kathryn," He breathed out her name. "I was so scared..." Chakotay held her so close to reassure himself that she was truly standing in front of him.
"I'm ok." Kathryn sighed wearily bringing her arms up and digging her fingers into his uniform. His warmth seeped into her taking away the strength she had managed to regain. Her wounds made themselves known to her in a dull ache. "I'm ok." She repeated over and over, each time her words growing fainter and fainter. Just being held by Chakotay was enough to chase away the pain radiating through her body, but she knew she had to get to Sickbay before too long. "Chakotay..." Gently she pushed back letting him see the extent of the pain she was in with only her eyes. After all these years he still knew how to read her.
"How bad?" Was all Chakotay needed to ask, but Kathryn didn't answer. He put his hands to her side that made her whimper in pain. Chakotay's right hand came away crimson. "Why didn't you say anything?" He scolded with his question.
"I'm fi..." Kathryn swayed on her feet falling against Chakotay. He took her left arm pulling it across his shoulders while his right arm lightly rested around her waist. Her Commander was taking her to sick bay but she couldn't stop herself from asking. "Don't you want to see how Seven is?"
"I'm taking care of you, Kathryn." Chakotay answered hauling her closer making her issue a small yelp of pain for being stubborn and not telling him she was injured over the comm so they could mean her to sickbay. Then, she stumbled and he was forced to pick her up. "You never take care of yourself." He scolded her. Kathryn wrapped her arms lightly around his neck,
"I have to take care of the crew first." Kathryn snarled through gritted teeth. She felt very Un-Captain-Like with her First Officer carrying her through the corridors of Voyager to the Sickbay. She knew why he was carrying her, she was losing blood. Kathryn honestly thought the wound to her side hadn't been that bad. Of course she was a scientist and not a doctor.
"Well then that leaves me to take care of you." Chakotay snapped walking through the doors of sickbay. He didn't give Kathryn time to respond. "Doctor!" He called out.
"What's going on Commander?" The Doctor asked coming out of his office to the sight of the Commander carrying the Captain. This was just another day in the Delta Quadrant.
"The Captain failed to mention that she was injured." Chakotay fixed Kathryn with a chiding glare. She looked away from him.
"I'm not that hurt," Kathryn's voice broke leaving the Doctor to arch his eyebrow at her. He could tell she was lying.
"Set her on the bio-bed Commander." The Doctor ordered. He went over to the instrument tray and retrieved a dermal regenerator, submicron sutures, and a hypospray to sedate the Captain.
Chakotay set her down on one of the bio-beds whispering to her, "Don't ever leave the ship again." His heart couldn't take the worry. It was this mission that finally slapped him in the face, screamed at him that Kathryn was the one person in the universe he was supposed to be with.
Kathryn couldn't help herself, "I thought I was the Captain here?" Seeing Chakotay's eyes soft, filled with concern broke her heart and toe down her resolve. She wanted him and he would have him.
"You are," Chakotay answered smiling, "But the Captain's safety is the first officer's prerogative. Keeping you alive is my responsibility," Once he had had to face a terrible away mission where she lay dying and he couldn't do anything. In that moment that lasted forever his life had changed. Gently he brushed back a strand of her hair covering the laceration to her face. "That would be an interesting scar," He muttered playfully.
"Too bad I'm not keeping it." Kathryn said just before the Doctor set the hypo to the side of her neck making the world go dark. She just hoped that when she woke up Chakotay would still be there.
TWO HOURS LATER:
Seven had felt strange upon seeing the Commander embrace the Captain without so much as a glance or a word spared for her. They were together, but he acted as if the Captain was more important to him than Seven was. Why was that? She took her time coming to the Sickbay, not sure what she would find. Seven entered through the second set of doors to go to the Doctors office, but she stopped and stared at Chakotay as he sat next to the Captain as she slept. "I never understood until now." She muttered when the Doctor came up to her side. "Seeing them like that, seeing him care more about her well being than for mine." Her voice wavered against her will.
"Seven, they have this bond that no one seems to fully understand. At one time, they had no one else except each other." The Doctor said watching his pupil watching the Commander and Captain. It was no secret on the ship that the Command Team were more than friends. They had a deep and loyal love for the other that bound them so close together.
"Why did he not say anything?" Seven asked continuing to observe Chakotay sitting by the Captain's bedside, holding her hand, and rubbing his thumb over the back of her knuckles. What was it about the Captain that made Chakotay worry so?
"Because it's complicated for them." The Doctor answered. Since the first day he was activated the Doctor could see the subtle threads of their merging lives being woven. They had been through countless dangers, infections, survived death, and still managed to smile for each other.
"Will you tell the Commander that we're over. I do not think I can speak to him at this moment." Seven didn't wait for the Doctor to answer. She escaped from Sickbay and went to hide in the Astrometrics lab until she could sort out all of her conflicting emotions.
Kathryn could feel herself coming out of the blackness of sleep. She groaned as her eyes opened. "Bruised all over." Focusing in the lowered lighting of sickbay she saw Chakotay smiling at her. Her heart still could flutter at the sight of his dimples. "You stayed..." His face was a welcome sight upon waking up. Once, long ago she had told him she could never imagine a day without him, and that was true. Chakotay was woven into her life with unbreakable threads.
Chakotay reached out had caressed Kathryn's cheek saying, "Of course I stayed." Even though the wound was healed, his finger traced the pink line where the laceration to her face had been and was still healing. "Seeing your blood," He shook his head, "It was a kick in the face. We've been at odds lately and now I know why. It was because of me being with Seven wasn't it?"
Kathryn looked away answering, "Yes," There was no need to lie to him, not when he knew her the way he did. "My heart was broken, and the world turned upside down, the moment I knew you were with her." She said keeping her eyes fixed on the LCARS panel on the wall. "But, I... I pushed you away." She knew that, she had had many long nights to think since finding out about them.
"I should have waited..." Chakotay repeated the tired refrain he had said to himself over and over since allowing himself to be courted by Seven. "I'm an idiot." Chakotay said gaining Kathryn's eyes.
"No," She lifted her hand to cup his face. "I..." He was out of his chair and crushing his lips to her to silence her next words. His tongue swept into her mouth drawing a moan from her. Oh Chakotay... Her mind sighed. He infused her being with passion, bringing to life the flames of desire she thought had died down so long ago.
Chakotay broke the kiss resting his forehead to hers. "Don't say anything..." He caught his breath. "It's not your fault." Kathryn was trying to take the blame, but in truth he was lonely and tired of being without someone. Kathryn was his heart, his soul; that should have been enough for him.
"Just let me fall on my sword..." Kathryn groaned halfheartedly fisting her hand in the front of his uniform. "Help me up," she grumbled trying to chase away the last bit of sleep. Chakotay stood up and pulled Kathryn up into a sitting position. "What are we going to do?"
"I have to try and talk to Seven, to explain things to her, but I doubt she'll listen." Chakotay hadn't even reacted when the Doctor relayed Seven's message for him. How would he do that? Would she even allow him to speak to her?
"Our life is never dull." Kathryn muttered, shaking her head. Chakotay chuckled kissing her forehead. For the first time in a long time her shoulders felt light, her heart swelled with actual joy and not the fabricated emotion she forced on herself to make sure her crew could face another day in the Delta Quadrant. Now, she had an actual reason to smile a real smile.
"No," Chakotay shook his head gently, "It's certainly not dull." He chuckled. "Want me to sneak you out of here?" His voice was a whisper that lit Kathryn's eyes up with gratitude. Chakotay backed away from the bio-bed to let her stand up. He knew she hadn't exactly been very happy when he had carried her from the shuttle bay to sickbay, but he wouldn't dare do that now.
"Yes, though, I doubt we need to sneak." Kathryn shook her head looking over at the Doctor watching them. The EMH nodded at her signaling she would be ok to leave, not that she really needed his permission. She was the Captain. Standing, Kathryn took stock of her healed body. There wasn't a twinge of pain to be had. Only, she felt the newly regenerated skin under her eye expecting to feel the cut, but it wasn't there.
CAPTAIN'S QUARTERS:
Chakotay stood close to Kathryn with his hands resting on her hips as his lips lazily kissed hers. She tasted just how he thought she would. Kathryn had the lingering trace of coffee infusing his taste buds. Her hands slid up his chest and over his shoulders where her fingers tangled in his hair, but she made no move to change the tenor of the kiss. Kathryn let him keep his easy. Even as he feasted at her lips, he couldn't help but to want to run his lips over her freshly healed wound. Trailing his lips along her jaw, down the side of her neck, Chakotay sank to his knees in front of her leaving Kathryn to stare down at him. Gently he reached up to pull the zipper of her uniform down to expose the standard issue turtle neck underneath.
Kathryn stood still, her chest rising and falling faster with each breath she took at the sight of Chakotay on his knees before her. He was slowly removing the jacket of her uniform. The zipper parted leaving her to let it fall from her shoulders. She thought Chakotay would stand up, to kiss her once more, but he stayed where he was. His hands touched her quivering abdomen, pulling the blue fabric free from her uniform pants to expose her pale skin. Chakotay leaned into her resting his lips to the right side of her navel. Kathryn inhaled a shuddering breath threading her fingers once again through his hair. He moved slowly, placing delicate kisses in a straight line finally resting over the patch of skin where her wound had been. His tongue flicked out, tracing a small circle on her sensitized skin.
Chakotay closed his eyes breathing in the scent of Kathryn. His mind brought forth the image of her side blood, the sight of the dermal regenerator knitting together the muscles and the skin until it was perfectly pale again. Over and over her pressed kisses into her newly healed skin reassuring himself that she was fine, that the Doctor had patched her up. Chakotay reversed course and kissed his way up her torso taking the blue turtle neck up and off of her body. The air caught in his lungs as he laid his eyes upon her black lace bra that was clearly not Starfleet issue. Chakotay moaned appreciatively. He stood once more dropping the article of clothing to the floor and then he whispered, "I want to sleep by your side tonight."
Tears welled in Kathryn's yes at his whispered words, "I want you to, too…" Tentatively, and not at all how her fantasies had imagined it, Kathryn pulled the zipper of his uniform down while her hands shook uncontrollably. Many times she had pictured what it would be like for her to set aside her rank, her regulations, and to finally take him as her lover. Reality had her imagination beat. The zipper fell apart to allow her to push the fabric of his uniform jacket off his shoulders. She wasted no time in taking off the blue turtle neck. Finally his bronzed flesh was revealed to her ravenous gaze. Instead she took his hand to lead him back to her bedroom. He followed her willingly.
Chakotay stepped through the open doorway into a room he had wanted to see in its entirety but had only ever caught glimpses of. Kathryn left him to linger in the light of the passing stars as she went to the dresser. She opened one of the drawers pulling free a black camisole to slip it on. When she turned back, Chakotay could only stare at her. He gazed on as she came back to him making two stops to remove her boots and set them aside. Then, she stood before him, leaving him to set his trembling fingers to the closure of her uniform pants. Like the school boy he had long since left behind he fumbled twice with the button leaving him to chuckle and rest his head to hers. "I should know how to do this." He joked, his tone barely above a whisper.
Kathryn set her hands to rest above his, "Its ok," Her voice was a whisper, a gentle breath of air. She took her hands and placed them on the waistband of his pants to pull free the button while, like him, her fingers trembled in anticipation. Slowly she inhaled, tried to steady her hands, but this was Chakotay standing before her, in her room, and looking at her like she was a dream come true. To her, Chakotay was a gift from the universe that she wasn't sure she deserved. "We have the rest of our lives for the next step." Kathryn lowered the zipper of Chakotay's pants letting the sound fill the void between them. "Tonight, let's just sleep." The black fabric of his pants slid down his hips and pooled on the floor.
Chakotay placed his hands on her hips to keep balance as he toed off his boots and his pants. Now, his hands were steady, while his heart galloped like wild stallions in his chest. This time the button yielded to his desires for it to be free from her skin. Like water it slid down her luscious legs to pool at her feet. Covering her female entrance were matching black underwear that made him gasp. He didn't give Kathryn the chance to step free of her discarded clothing. Chakotay ran his hands down her hips and to the back of her thighs. With ease and strength he picked her up. "Sleep sounds perfect." Yes, there were times when his mind couldn't pull free of the naughty carnal wantonness flowing through him. Tonight was a different story. Kathryn was allowing him to touch her the way he always dreamed of. Carefully he carried her to the bed where he set her down.
Kathryn marveled at the sight of her Angry Warrior cast in the glow of starlight, every inch of his bronzed flesh exposed to her eyes. He stood before her without a stitch of clothing on. She moved to the middle of the bed to make room for him to lie down beside her. Without words Chakotay crawled on to the bed and stretched out. Kathryn curled into him, sighed when he encased her in his warmth. She snuggled closer, slipped her leg between his and let her mind go blank. All she needed was Chakotay and the feel of her ship cruising along at warp speed. This was how her life could have gone a lot sooner had she not been so stubborn.
Chakotay let his body settle as Kathryn curled into his side placing her right hand over his heart. She fit to him perfectly, made for his body; she was made for his soul. What had possessed him to start seeing Seven? That answer eluded him from the first moment he asked it. Was it flattering to be courted by a younger woman? Perhaps. But e should have known better. Yes, Kathryn pushed him away, but she had been doing so for years, yet he always stayed. There were time when physical needs were stronger than his heart and he had the occasional dalliance with alien women they encountered, but those were few and far between as well. None of that mattered now. He was where he was meant to be, with her, at her side. That realization, the feel of her, had him slipping away into slumber.
MORNING:
Kathryn woke feeling refreshed like she hadn't in a long time. The caffeine induced insomnia fled her bones from just being next to Chakotay. How could someone have such an effect on her so quickly? That was easy, he was Chakotay, and he was her missing half. Opening her eyes she gazed upon him still held firmly in the grips of sleep. His face was relaxed, lips slightly parted. Oh how Kathryn wanted to kiss him awake. She shifted a fraction of an inch to feel some part of Chakotay nudging her lower abdomen. Kathryn smirked knowing exactly what part of Chakotay was nudging her. He was deep in sleep and all men suffered from that certain morning affliction. Slowly scooting back so she could get out of bed, Kathryn left Chakotay to his rest while she strode out the living area to have her habitual first cup of coffee.
Taking her coffee mug from the replicator Kathryn took the next step in her morning routine. She stood in the same spot near her view port, to stare at all the stars that were passing by at warp speed. She thought of all the worlds they weren't going to visit, all the people they were never going to meet on their long journey home. As she continued to stare she caught sight of her reflection. Normally she would have slept in her peach night gown, and upon getting out of bed he would have put on her robe, but this morning was different. She stayed clad in her black underwear and matching camisole. Affixed to her lips was a light smile. It had been a long time since she had woken in this quadrant with a smile. "Oh, Chakotay," Kathryn sighed his name knowing that he was the reason for her stillness this morning. Sensing that she was being watched she saw Chakotay standing n all of his naked glory had hidden in shadows wearing a smile.
"I woke alone," Chakotay accused good naturedly walking to her. He knew he was wearing nothing but a smile and Kathryn didn't seem to mind. Her eyes were locked with his as he closed the distance between them. Immediately his hands sought out her waist, the tips of his fingers needing the warmth of her skin against them. "I was hoping we could cuddle this morning." He suggested knowing full well that they had to be on the bridge soon. Gently, so as not to spill her beloved coffee, he pulled her close and kissed her good morning. The kiss was lazy but promised passion to come.
Kathryn broke the kiss slowly and with a moan of protest mentally cursing they had to be on the bridge. "I would love to stay here and play, but," she took one step back, "We have a ship to run mister." Kathryn teased. Chakotay pouted playfully rubbing the pads of his thumbs over her hips. Back and forth. Back and forth. Kathryn moaned again. "Chakotay…"
"Just a kiss," Chakotay begged pulling her back to him. "A small touch of lips to keep me sated through the day." He knew that no matter how many kisses they shared he would never be able to satisfy the hunger Kathryn fueled inside of him. She leaned into him allowing him to claim her mouth. True to his word he set his lips to hers gently; just a brush of lips. He was pleasantly surprised when Kathryn chose to deepen the kiss. Her tongue traced the seam of his closed lips bidding entry into his mouth. Was he going to allow her access to his mouth or would he deny her?
Kathryn pulled back even though she sought to add more passion to the kiss, "Let's have breakfast." She said wanting suddenly to be normal. "And then you can pry me away for lunch," Kathryn chuckled knowing Chakotay always fussed at her for not eating lunch and having too much coffee. "And then tonight we can have dinner." His smile, those dimples of his, lit up the room and that was her answer.
"Ok," Chakotay laughed, "We'll have dinner, provided I get to have you for desert." He said pulling her back against him once more. Kathryn surprised him time and again. "But," He relented, "Breakfast would be a good place to start." Then it occurred to him that his uniform currently littering her floor was still stained with blood. "Mind if I borrow your replicator? I need a new uniform."
"Sure," Kathryn smiled. Chakotay kissed her once more and then went over to the replicator to program in a new uniform to fit his long well muscled frame. She took a few minutes to stare openly at his impressive backside imaging the feel of him in her hands. Her fingers flexed in response to the images running rampant through her mind. That was Kathryn's cue to get dressed as well after a quick sonic shower. Setting her cup aside she retreated into her sleeping quarters and then to the bathroom beyond.
MESS HALL:
Chakotay sat with Kathryn in the mess hall laughing with her, watching her drink another cup of coffee, and share a somewhat normal meal together. He could see some of the crew watching them, smiling, and for the first time in months, the tension on the ship seemed to dial down to a normal level, well what passes for normal on a ship in a dangerous unexplored part of the galaxy. Today felt like a good day to Chakotay now that he was going in the right direction with his life. Kathryn was telling him so outlandish story of her back in her Academy days when she was known to pull a prank or two. Chakotay couldn't help but to listen in rapture and shake his head with disbelief. "I don't believe it!" He shook his head.
"I'm your Captain," Kathryn smirked, "You're supposed to believe everything I say." She took another sip of her coffee to chase the odd taste of the scrambled eggs she had on her plate. Chell was pulling double duty, working in Engineering and as ships cook. It was in these moments that she missed Neelix and his cooking.
"Not when you tell and outlandish story like that." Chakotay scoffed. "I will not believe that you go a few male cadets drunk and had them run the obstacle course in their underwear while recording it." Though, now that he said it, he could believe it from her. Kathryn had a wicked streak in her.
"I was young," Kathryn shrugged laughing. She stretched out her hand and placed it lightly on his arm while she was trying not to notice the way her, their, crew would stare at them. There was this sense of ease filling the air as the crew looked on at the Command Team resuming a normal day.
"Oh I believe it." Chakotay wanted to reach out and take her hand, but he surprised him by resting her hand on his arm. The crew knew that their Captain was prone to touch them, placing her hand on their shoulder ever now and then, but they also knew that their Captain tended to touch the Commander more. As much as he wanted this light atmosphere to continue, Chakotay said, "I guess it's time we head to the bridge."
Kathryn playfully groaned, "If we must, then we must." She took her tray and mug over to the little side table Neelix had set up for dirty dishes that he would take care of after each meal. Taking a deep breath of the resounding calm radiating through her ship, Kathryn left the mess hall with Chakotay walking by her side as was his place. It was going to be a good day.
BRIDGE:
Chakotay stepped out onto the Bridge teasing Kathryn to make her chuckle and turn a playful glare on him. But, once he saw Seven, he stopped. Kathryn also looked at the former Borg drone and toned done her good mood. Without a word he went immediately to his command chair and activated the console that was between his seat and Kathryn's. There was this strong urge to turn back, to look at Kathryn, but he knew better. On the bridge he was a Commander. Here, he had to be professional. So he forced himself to look over the reports that had been left the day before when the Captain and Seven had been in trouble.
Kathryn waited until Chakotay took his customary place on the bridge before she walked over to Seven. "Seven," The young woman looked at her, "Join me in my ready room please." Seven looked as if she wanted to protest, but Kathryn said again, "Please." This time Seven nodded her head and followed her towards the doors that led to her ready room. It was then that she felt Chakotay's eyes on her, but she did not dare turn to look at him.
Seven wasn't sure what the Captain wanted to talk to her about. Stepping into the Ready Room she was motioned to have a seat on the couch on the upper level but as usual she chose to remain standing. So, that left the Captain to go to her desk and lean back against it in a relaxed position. "What do you wish to say to me?" Seven asked.
Kathryn expected this. She cleared her throat and then crossed her arms. "I don't know what I can say." Her words were soft, un-confrontational. They were just the truth. "When we were brought back on Voyager, I had every intention of going to sickbay, letting the Doctor tend my wound and then retreat to my quarters. Then there he was, and I scolded myself for daring to believe that his look of relief was for me when, in that moment, it should have been for you." Kathryn looked at Seven then.
"Why did he choose you?" Seven asked without thought. Her mouth opened and the words poured out. She had been wondering that very question all morning without much success of an answer.
"It's complicated, Seven," Kathryn said. "He and I, for a time, were all the other had." She remembered their time on New Earth, their time alone. She longed to be back there, back in the bathtub he made for her or watching him as he worked to make the shelter more comfortable for them. "Once, I told him that I couldn't imagine a day without him." she could see her words were confusing Seven.
"I do not understand." Seven stated feeling more and more of her confusion.
"Ok," Kathryn pushed away from the desk and asked, "When you look at Chakotay, does your heart falter, does it skip a beat when he smiles at you. Do you feel yourself going weak at the knees when he stands close to you?"
"Is that what happens to you?" Seven asked before answering the Captain's question.
"Yes," Kathryn nodded, "Every day for seven long years." One day, she wasn't sure when, Kathryn woke up just loving Chakotay with all that she had. He could make her heart race. He could make her smile when circumstances seemed very bleak. He could melt away her anger with just a look. It took Chakotay finally giving up on her to give Kathryn a kick to force her to face the truth of her heart. "If I've hurt you, then I'm sorry."
"You didn't" Seven answered calmly; her confusion melted away. "And to answer your question, no, the Commander does not change my vitals in such a manner."
"Ah," Kathryn resisted the urge to chuckle at her answer. 'Typical Seven,' she thought. "Well, when you find a man who can 'change your vitals' then you'll know what I feel every day."
"I didn't stop to consider what pain I would inflict on you." Seven said before turning to leave the Captain's Ready Room. She had a lot to think about that required being along with her thoughts.
Chakotay let Seven pass him without so much as a word. When the time was right she would speak to him again, maybe. The doors closed giving him the freedom to go to I Captain. "How bad was it?" He asked stopping just short of taking her in his arms.
Kathryn wrinkled her brow, "Not as bad as I thought." She answered closing the distance between them. Kathryn slid her hands up his chest and over his shoulders, "Apparently you don't change her vitals one bit."
"What?" Chakotay pinned Kathryn with a confused stare while resisting the urge to chuckle at the face she was makes. "You'll have to explain the joke to me." His hands slipped over her hips and his fingers laced at the small of her back.
Kathryn chuckled, "Well, Seven asked why you chose me. Since I didn't answer her question, I asked a few of my own. I asked if you made her heart skip a beat," Kathryn took her left hand and placed it over his heart. "I asked her if you could make her feel weak in the knees." Kathryn tightened the hold her right arm had on him. "You do all of that to me and much more." She rose up on her tip toes to kiss his lips gently. "It was then that Seven informed me that you do not change her vitals." Kathryn joked.
Chakotay said nothing he just rested his forehead to hers and basked in the feeling of her warmth sinking into him to chase away the rest of the loneliness he had felt. He tightened his hold on her giving him the leverage to stand tall, lifting her against him. Kathryn sighed against him, trusting him like she always had. "It's nice to know that I change your vitals." He joked. Kathryn started to laugh holding him tighter. The sound of her laughter was music to his ears.
