Title: Linger
Author: Jane McCartney
Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. Period.
Classification: A real mix with old and new characters in it, crossover with Angel too.
Rating: PG13
Feedback: Yes, yes, yes! It's like every writer's drug, our ambrosia!
Email: janemccartney@bol.com.br
Distribution: Just tell me first.
Acknowledgements: Theo, my readers, Theo, my reviewers, Theo, Theo and once again Theo.
Note: I don't know what hit me when I started to write this, but I finished it anyway. It's weird, it's confusing and I guess no one's gonna risk reading any further now... oh well.
Summary: The afterlife shows Tara a whole new perspective on how to see things. And she finds help to understand just how complicated things can really be, within an unlikely group of strange and familiar faces.
***
"I just think George Lucas was too highly praised by the media... I don't know, a bunch of lightsabers and that little guy who speaks all funny? 'The Godfather' just seems like the better trilogy to me, kiddo," a man with a strong Irish accent pontificated.
"No way in Hell you're being serious!" the brown-haired boy replied, seemingly shocked by the words. "The characters, the evolution of the trilogy, the fight scenes... George's the man, ya can't take it away from him! Besides - Brando's fat now, dude."
"I, I didn't think you could say hell up here," Tara wondered with a frown.
"Oh yeah. Crap," another light brown-haired young man muttered under his breath, but loud enough to make the blonde Wiccan jerk her head towards him.
With an even more confused shake of her head, Tara mused, "Now, I'm pretty sure Buffy told me, that Spike told her, you were nothing like he was before you were turned - but you look incredibly similar to him... in my opinion."
"Well, I picked up one or two things watchin' him. Has an awful lot of bloody desire, he does, but Spike's alright regardless," William simply shrugged, as if what he was talking about was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Th-that certainly explains the spiky hair on a child of the 19th century," Tara hinted, the baffled look never leaving her face.
"I 'appen to find it stylish," Spike's human soul cringed defensively, seemingly offended. "And that was mean," he whispered, hurt.
"I'm, I'm sorry," the blonde girl blurted out, looking even more astonished. Now that did not sound like Spike at all.
The half-demon Doyle, who was listening in by now, simply chuckled. "Ya've a lot of catchin' up to do, princess," he said with a grin on his lips.
A more mature, brunette woman interrupted and explained sympathetically, "Tara, some souls maintain a stronger connection with their body after the vampire demon takes it. That's why you've got vampires with more personality, and others with less."
"Leaders and followers," Doyle completed with an afterthought.
Jenny Calendar, or Janna of the Kalderash gypsy clan nodded. "That's right. Master vampires, for instance, tend to share a strong bond with the man or woman's soul they were before. That doesn't mean the person was necessarily bad when they were alive, just that their connection gives the demon more intelligence, a greater aptitude for evil."
"Wow," Tara frowned at the new piece of information. "I guess I do have a lot of catching up to do," she admitted coyly.
"Don't take the librarian's pet as an example, luv," William spoke up. "She followed her boyfriend's path and spends all her bloody time in the athenaeum, making herself smart with all those books!"
"There's a library in Heaven? W-with cards to mark the books you get, and a bunch of people shushing you when you speak too loud?" Tara whispered in confusion to the brown-haired boy, who was the closest one at the moment.
Actually, Tara knew the kid. She hadn't ever actually met him when she'd been alive, but from a few pictures Willow had shown her sometimes... the blonde knew who he was.
Jesse, Willow and Xander's best friend. Before he'd gotten killed by Angel's sire, Darla.
Every time her girlfriend would talk about him, the redhead's eyes would get blurry. And the one time Tara had asked Xander about it, she could swear the glorified bricklayer had put all possible effort into changing the subject.
Jesse just turned back to her, a frown on his boyish face. "I don't know, babe - books are really not my thing, for passing the time in Heaven."
"Why doesn't that surprise me, you wanker?" William grunted.
"That was definitively deja-vu," Tara meditated with some amusement. "And I always thought you could, I don't know, just snap your fingers and get the knowledge or something up here," the blonde girl continued talking afterwards, her expression showing more and more puzzlement with every passing instant.
All of the others stared back at her in incredulity.
"Well, I-I thought Willow's theory of Heaven wasn't so bright when she told me too," the blonde girl cringed apologetically.
"I do find it very interesting, dear," Joyce Summers told her sympathetically, with a warm smile on her face.
Tara couldn't help but smile back. Dawn and Buffy's mother's smile had always been a beautiful and comforting one.
Jenny smiled too and continued, "In William and Spike's case, they share an even stronger bond than the norm. It's rare and unusual, but not impossible. The explanations for this fact are a little cloudy as yet, but we can only surmise that there is... some kind of reason for it, a higher plan," the former computer teacher sounded uncertain.
"What she meant is, the Big Boss probably has a reason to have made 'em so alike," Doyle simplified. "He has some bloody twisted sense o' humor though, to spring two of 'em on us to annoy with no apparent reason," the Irish half-demon mused entertainingly.
"Then there is a God?" Tara asked carefully.
Some glances were exchanged between the members of the group. Later, Joyce was the first to speak up, in a soft and prudent voice.
"We honestly can't answer that, honey. Being here proves to me that there is, but we can't measure beliefs or give specific names. I guess we can just... feel."
"It's a complicated question," Jenny agreed. "Allah, Yahweh, God, Shiva... these are just names, names that men created. Some like to believe everyone has an ideal of Heaven, and some groups tend to match theirs because of an inherent cultural mesh."
"Ya can't make up your own version o' Paradise though, princess, if that's what you're wondering," Doyle interrupted with a grin at Tara's frown.
"Looked great 'n all in Robin Williams' movie, but I've tried and it didn't work. Just seemed I couldn't make everything fade away into a huge harem, with two thousand women believin' I'm their lord and master," the Irishman joked.
After some much-needed seconds to absorb all the information, Tara looked at William and then at Jenny. "So that's why Spike is so different to all other vampires?"
Even when the question sounded more like a statement, Jenny nodded.
Tara stayed silent for some time, and asked the question with an apprehensive, prudent voice. "Is he capable of feeling true love, then?"
"Buffy," Joyce closed her eyes for a fleeting instant, and then smiled in a melancholy way. "You're asking if he's able to truly love my daughter, aren't you?"
The blonde witch nodded, feeling guilty. "Y-yes. I, I don't know... with everything that's happened, I just wonder if..."
"That's okay, honey," Joyce spoke softly. "I've been wondering too."
"Because you don't know either," Tara completed gently, with a sad smile, as she understood the implications of her words.
William looked up at her; an almost-scared and expecting look on his face as the blonde girl stated one more time, the soft and almost bitter words.
"You just can't know if a demon is truly able to love someone. Wisely o-or otherwise."
***
Okay, I know it's confusing. Very confusing. I'll try to explain more later, if I ever write a second chapter anyway. But please, pretty please, review me!
Author: Jane McCartney
Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine. Period.
Classification: A real mix with old and new characters in it, crossover with Angel too.
Rating: PG13
Feedback: Yes, yes, yes! It's like every writer's drug, our ambrosia!
Email: janemccartney@bol.com.br
Distribution: Just tell me first.
Acknowledgements: Theo, my readers, Theo, my reviewers, Theo, Theo and once again Theo.
Note: I don't know what hit me when I started to write this, but I finished it anyway. It's weird, it's confusing and I guess no one's gonna risk reading any further now... oh well.
Summary: The afterlife shows Tara a whole new perspective on how to see things. And she finds help to understand just how complicated things can really be, within an unlikely group of strange and familiar faces.
***
"I just think George Lucas was too highly praised by the media... I don't know, a bunch of lightsabers and that little guy who speaks all funny? 'The Godfather' just seems like the better trilogy to me, kiddo," a man with a strong Irish accent pontificated.
"No way in Hell you're being serious!" the brown-haired boy replied, seemingly shocked by the words. "The characters, the evolution of the trilogy, the fight scenes... George's the man, ya can't take it away from him! Besides - Brando's fat now, dude."
"I, I didn't think you could say hell up here," Tara wondered with a frown.
"Oh yeah. Crap," another light brown-haired young man muttered under his breath, but loud enough to make the blonde Wiccan jerk her head towards him.
With an even more confused shake of her head, Tara mused, "Now, I'm pretty sure Buffy told me, that Spike told her, you were nothing like he was before you were turned - but you look incredibly similar to him... in my opinion."
"Well, I picked up one or two things watchin' him. Has an awful lot of bloody desire, he does, but Spike's alright regardless," William simply shrugged, as if what he was talking about was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Th-that certainly explains the spiky hair on a child of the 19th century," Tara hinted, the baffled look never leaving her face.
"I 'appen to find it stylish," Spike's human soul cringed defensively, seemingly offended. "And that was mean," he whispered, hurt.
"I'm, I'm sorry," the blonde girl blurted out, looking even more astonished. Now that did not sound like Spike at all.
The half-demon Doyle, who was listening in by now, simply chuckled. "Ya've a lot of catchin' up to do, princess," he said with a grin on his lips.
A more mature, brunette woman interrupted and explained sympathetically, "Tara, some souls maintain a stronger connection with their body after the vampire demon takes it. That's why you've got vampires with more personality, and others with less."
"Leaders and followers," Doyle completed with an afterthought.
Jenny Calendar, or Janna of the Kalderash gypsy clan nodded. "That's right. Master vampires, for instance, tend to share a strong bond with the man or woman's soul they were before. That doesn't mean the person was necessarily bad when they were alive, just that their connection gives the demon more intelligence, a greater aptitude for evil."
"Wow," Tara frowned at the new piece of information. "I guess I do have a lot of catching up to do," she admitted coyly.
"Don't take the librarian's pet as an example, luv," William spoke up. "She followed her boyfriend's path and spends all her bloody time in the athenaeum, making herself smart with all those books!"
"There's a library in Heaven? W-with cards to mark the books you get, and a bunch of people shushing you when you speak too loud?" Tara whispered in confusion to the brown-haired boy, who was the closest one at the moment.
Actually, Tara knew the kid. She hadn't ever actually met him when she'd been alive, but from a few pictures Willow had shown her sometimes... the blonde knew who he was.
Jesse, Willow and Xander's best friend. Before he'd gotten killed by Angel's sire, Darla.
Every time her girlfriend would talk about him, the redhead's eyes would get blurry. And the one time Tara had asked Xander about it, she could swear the glorified bricklayer had put all possible effort into changing the subject.
Jesse just turned back to her, a frown on his boyish face. "I don't know, babe - books are really not my thing, for passing the time in Heaven."
"Why doesn't that surprise me, you wanker?" William grunted.
"That was definitively deja-vu," Tara meditated with some amusement. "And I always thought you could, I don't know, just snap your fingers and get the knowledge or something up here," the blonde girl continued talking afterwards, her expression showing more and more puzzlement with every passing instant.
All of the others stared back at her in incredulity.
"Well, I-I thought Willow's theory of Heaven wasn't so bright when she told me too," the blonde girl cringed apologetically.
"I do find it very interesting, dear," Joyce Summers told her sympathetically, with a warm smile on her face.
Tara couldn't help but smile back. Dawn and Buffy's mother's smile had always been a beautiful and comforting one.
Jenny smiled too and continued, "In William and Spike's case, they share an even stronger bond than the norm. It's rare and unusual, but not impossible. The explanations for this fact are a little cloudy as yet, but we can only surmise that there is... some kind of reason for it, a higher plan," the former computer teacher sounded uncertain.
"What she meant is, the Big Boss probably has a reason to have made 'em so alike," Doyle simplified. "He has some bloody twisted sense o' humor though, to spring two of 'em on us to annoy with no apparent reason," the Irish half-demon mused entertainingly.
"Then there is a God?" Tara asked carefully.
Some glances were exchanged between the members of the group. Later, Joyce was the first to speak up, in a soft and prudent voice.
"We honestly can't answer that, honey. Being here proves to me that there is, but we can't measure beliefs or give specific names. I guess we can just... feel."
"It's a complicated question," Jenny agreed. "Allah, Yahweh, God, Shiva... these are just names, names that men created. Some like to believe everyone has an ideal of Heaven, and some groups tend to match theirs because of an inherent cultural mesh."
"Ya can't make up your own version o' Paradise though, princess, if that's what you're wondering," Doyle interrupted with a grin at Tara's frown.
"Looked great 'n all in Robin Williams' movie, but I've tried and it didn't work. Just seemed I couldn't make everything fade away into a huge harem, with two thousand women believin' I'm their lord and master," the Irishman joked.
After some much-needed seconds to absorb all the information, Tara looked at William and then at Jenny. "So that's why Spike is so different to all other vampires?"
Even when the question sounded more like a statement, Jenny nodded.
Tara stayed silent for some time, and asked the question with an apprehensive, prudent voice. "Is he capable of feeling true love, then?"
"Buffy," Joyce closed her eyes for a fleeting instant, and then smiled in a melancholy way. "You're asking if he's able to truly love my daughter, aren't you?"
The blonde witch nodded, feeling guilty. "Y-yes. I, I don't know... with everything that's happened, I just wonder if..."
"That's okay, honey," Joyce spoke softly. "I've been wondering too."
"Because you don't know either," Tara completed gently, with a sad smile, as she understood the implications of her words.
William looked up at her; an almost-scared and expecting look on his face as the blonde girl stated one more time, the soft and almost bitter words.
"You just can't know if a demon is truly able to love someone. Wisely o-or otherwise."
***
Okay, I know it's confusing. Very confusing. I'll try to explain more later, if I ever write a second chapter anyway. But please, pretty please, review me!