A/N: Happy Halloween! Sorry this took so long, I really couldn't decide what turian marriage customs should be, and I didn't want to steal from somebody else's ideas, so I chickened out and just did the human ceremony. If you're new to this series, I strongly recommend you read all the prequels: "One of Those Relationships", "The Talk", "The End of All Things", and "Guess Who I Brought Home!".

It should be noted that I've only ever attended one wedding, and that was a Catholic wedding at some Polish church that our GPS completely butchered the name of, so I'm mostly going off of what I could research.

1: Happily Ever After…

"Khalisah Bint Sinan al-Jilani, Westerlund News."

John Shepard sighed "I know who you are Khalisah…"

The reporter ignored him, continuing with what was clearly a rehearsed script. "Your twin sister Alice is marrying renowned turian Garrus Vakarian today, making them one of the first public human-turian unions. Tell me, how does it make you feel knowing that your sister is a xenophile?"

Shepard glared at Khalisah and the hover-camera floating beside her. "You know, I don't have to talk to you; I'm doing this interview out of the kindness of my heart so I would appreciate it if you treated me and my family with respect."

Khalisah didn't back down "You still haven't answered the question."

Shepard shrugged "Honestly? I'm fine with it. Alice is my sister so naturally I'm a little protective but I trust Garrus with my life. He's my best friend and I couldn't think of anyone better for Alice." He turned and started to walk away, signaling that the interview was over.

Khalisah wasn't done yet however "But surely-"

"Lily wait, not the chandelier!"

"Weeeee!"

CRASH!

Shepard groaned and put his head in his hands at the distant crash. Turning back to the puzzled reporter, he said "Khalisah, we'll have to go through the whole 'you attempting to twist my words to make me look bad and failing miserably' thing later. Right now, I need to go ride herd on my daughter." With that, Shepard ran out of the room the interview had been taking place in.

In the reception hall, people were swarming around, trying to prep the room for the large crowd that would be arriving in a couple hours. In the center of the room, above the dance floor, hung a large, pure asari-crafted crystal chandelier made from the most precious minerals on Thessia.

Or rather had hung. The chandelier was now a giant shattered pile on the floor. Off to the side stood a little three year old girl with golden blond hair just like her grandmother's doing her best to look ashamed as she was scolded by her babysitter. "You don't just climb onto a chandelier and swing on it!" the man scolded "And you especially don't cut the cables holding it up! What if you had been hurt?! Your father would have broken every bone in my body if anything had happened to you!"

"I'm glad to see you're handling babysitting duty so well Joker,"

"Commander!" Joker jumped and spun to face John. "I- er- I didn't-"

John raised his hand, cutting Joker off "How did she get on the chandelier?"

Joker looked at him helplessly "I don't know! I turned away for a second and next thing I know she's up there acting like she's at the rodeo!"

"And the cables?"

"I've got no freaking clue!" Joker cried "What on earth made you think that having the cripple in charge of the high-energy, trouble making toddler anyways?! Couldn't somebody else have watched her?"

"Well let's see…" John started counting off on his fingers "Jacob's too busy watching his kids, Brynn's pregnant-"

"Again?" Joker said in disbelief. "Man, those two need a hobby."

John nodded "Agreed. Kelly's turned into a slave driver and is putting Cortez, Traynor, Adams, Gabby, and Ken to work on decorations (Lord help us). Allers is too busy being a reporter. Rahn has her hands full watching 'curious Kal'. Gardner's working in the kitchens. Zaeed is the reason she knows more curse words at three than I do now. Bakara and Chakwas are looking after Mordin. Kasumi taught Lily how to bypass locks the last time she watched her, and besides, she, Ash, Liara, Tali, Miranda, EDI, Jack, my mom, and Samara are all "helping" Alice get ready. My dad's busy trading stories with Garrus' family, and Javik would scare her. You were the only one left."

"What about Wrex, Vega, or Grunt?"

John gave Joker a flat stare "Do you really think that those three could be trusted to watch a little girl with a talent for trouble? Besides, they're all with Gar-" John froze when he realized that a certain mischievous three year old was missing. "Joker?" he asked nervously "Where's Lily?"

Joker spun around to where Lily had just been standing "I swear she was right here!"

Suddenly, they heard Khalisah release a shrill shriek accompanied by Lily's joyous giggling "Charge Urzy!"

Joker snickered while John face-palmed with a groan "Lily…"

Meanwhile, the mother of aforementioned little demon was doing her best not to collapse into fits of laughter as Tali and Liara fussed over the bride. "Really Liara, it's alright." Alice was saying.

"No, no, no!" Liara cried, "This doesn't go with the dress at all!"

"It's the underwear Liara…"

"Shush Miranda; it all has to match perfectly!"

"The only person who's going to be seeing the underwear is Garrus, Liara." Alice pleaded "And he likes the blue."

"Stop worrying about the underwear Liara." Tali scolded.

Alice breathed a sigh of relief "Thank you Tali…"

"Now her hair on the other hand…"

Alice swore and noticed in the mirror that Ashley was snickering "Enjoying yourself Mrs. Shepard?"

Ashley grinned "Just think of it as me getting revenge for the way you teased me at my wedding."

"Tali stop; let me." Miranda stepped forward. "I know a great deal about hair care."

Jack snorted "You would."

Ignoring the ex-convict, Miranda got to work. Nearby, EDI and Samara were examining Alice's dress while Kasumi sifted through Alice's jewelry box. "Really Alice?" Kasumi said, pulling out a Mardi Gras necklace.

Alice winced "We visited my grandparents in New Orleans for Mardi Gras last year…"

Kasumi shook her head and tossed the gaudy beads aside, continuing to search through the box. "Ugh, rhinestones."

"I don't normally wear jewelry okay!" Alice defended.

"Clearly" Kasumi smirked "I guess I'll just have to grab some jewelry from my private stash. Back in a bit!" with that, Kasumi vanished into thin air.

Alice groaned "How much you want to bet that her 'private stash' is all stolen?"

"I don't bet on sure things." Miranda said flatly as she worked Alice's hair. "Dear God Alice, do you even take care of your hair?"

"I wash it!" Alice protested.

"And condition?" Miranda persisted.

"Yes."

"What brand do you use?"

"Dove." Alice stated.

"Dove? Dove?" Miranda looked at Alice incredulously. "What is wrong with you?"

Alice's face reddened "It's a perfectly good brand!"

"Yeah, if you're trying to be boring!" Miranda shot back.

"Be nice Miranda," Ashley teased, watching the spectacle with amusement.

"Shush," Miranda grabbed Alice's arm and started dragging her away "I need an emergency salon treatment, STAT!"

"Miranda…" Alice groaned as the ex-Cerberus officer led her to the bathroom.

Ashley laughed and turned to her mother-in-law Hannah Shepard. "Let me guess, she gets it from your side of the family?"

Hannah shook her head, "Nope," she grinned "We Shepards are a 'refined' bunch, as my parents would say. No doubt they had a heart attack when they learned Alice was marrying a turian. I remember how furious they were when they found out about me and Carn."

"I take it you're not on good terms?" Tali asked.

"That's putting it mildly." Hannah chuckled.

Suddenly a shrill shriek came from the bathroom "Hold still Alice!"

"Keep those nightmare scissors away from me!"

"They're for texturizing your hair! Now. Hold. Still!"

"NO!"

Hannah chuckled "I better go in and calm Alice down." She headed into the bathroom and the sounds of struggle ceased not long after.

Several minutes later, Alice, Miranda, and Hannah emerged from the bathroom. Tali squealed "You look beautiful!"

Alice's black hair shone brilliantly in the light, it was stylized with waves and curls that it normally lacked, framing her face perfectly. She was even wearing makeup, subtle touches that accented her natural beauty, not hide it beneath a mask.

Alice scowled "I've been violated."

"No you haven't" Miranda said "I've merely made you presentable for your wedding. Trust me, Garrus will be drooling all over you. Now let's get you in that dress!"

Alice eyed the gown with distaste "Can't I just wear one of my other dresses, you know, one less clingy?"

"Absolutely not!" Liara snapped "Do you have any idea how much this cost to make? Even with my significant funds, custom tailored, pure hand woven silk is expensive!"

"I never asked you to spend so much money on it Liara!" Alice retorted.

Samara turned to Alice "It was a thoughtful gift Alice, the least you could do is wear it for one day."

Alice sighed in resignation "Fine…"

"Don't worry Alice," Tali reassured her "You'll love it!" she lifted the dress off of the hanger it was carefully placed on "Now, does anyone know how to get her in this?"

…

"Bullshit," Solana said.

"It's true!" Alice and John's father Carnegie "Carn" Shepard insisted. "John was incredibly rebellious as a teenager. It didn't help that we were stationed on the Citadel at the time."

Solana shook her head "That may be true, but I seriously doubt that Commander Shepard was arrested for having sex with a turain girl in public."

Vakarian spoke up "Actually Sol, I do remember hearing about that in C-Sec. If I'm correct the boy had gotten several deep scratches because the girl hadn't blunted her talons in several weeks."

Carn nodded "Yep, she actually severed an artery. We had to take him to the emergency room, Hannah, Alice, and I were terrified, but John just kept grinning like the cat that ate the canary."

"The what?" Solana asked with a puzzled look

"It's a human expression."

"I'm assuming that you punished him?" Vakarian said.

Carn shook his head "Didn't need to, Alice was so angry at John that she made his life a living hell for weeks."

"How so?"

Carn grinned "Let's just say that there's a reason my son hates hanar clowns."

"And they're good ones!" Carn turned and saw John walking over, Lily in his arms.

Carn rolled his eyes and took his granddaughter from John's arms, smiling brightly "So how has my little angel been doing?" he cooed, causing Lily to giggle.

"I believe our 'angel' has made an enemy of al-Jilani." John said, rubbing his eyes "She sicked Urz on her."

Carn beamed at Lily. "Thatta' girl!"

"Sure, encourage her why don't you?" John mumbled "Listen, can you watch her? I need to go check with Admiral Hackett and see if he's ready."

"I am," Hackett said, appearing behind John. "I suggest we get things started; that perky woman, Kelly Chambers, has started harassing the Primarch with her flirting."

John sighed "Yeah that sounds like Kelly. I'll go tell everyone we're starting."

…

Garrus fidgeted in the black turian "tuxedo". Spirits this is uncomfortable.

Next to him, Wrex chuckled, "Nervous Vakarian?"

Garrus glared at Wrex "Remind me again why you're standing next to me instead of John? I believe I choose him to be my best man."

Wrex grunted "I'm a placeholder on the off chance that he's too busy with the press to make it."

At that moment John jogged up behind them "Move over Wrex," he said, squeezing in between the krogan and the turian. "Sorry I'm late."

"I'm just glad you made it." Garrus said "I thought al-Jilani would keep you tied down for hours."

John grinned "You can thank my new press liaison and her trusty varren steed for that."

Garrus cocked a brow-plate at John "This 'press liaison' wouldn't also happen to be the flower girl would she?"

"Perhaps"

The ceremony was taking place on a broad terrace overlooking the Presidium. White benches had been lined along either side of a long red carpet that led up to the arch covered white flowers under which Garrus, John, Wrex, and Admiral Hackett stood. People were already starting to fill the benches toward the rear, the front reserved for friends, family, and the crew of the Normandy. They had initially tried to keep the ceremony a private affair at the very least. Unfortunately, the media had caught wind of the event and there were several cameras floating around. In addition to friends and family, the ceremony was also going to be attended by several persons of note from both the human and turian governments, and the reception was going to be attended by even more people (although this time the krogans and the salarians would be seated as far away from each other as possible, didn't want a repeat of John and Ashley's wedding reception after all).

"It's starting," John said when the crew of the Normandy had taken their seats.

Garrus straightened up as the music started to play. Alice had wanted to do both the turian and human ceremonies, but Garrus had convinced her that turian marriages were long, boring affairs and that, if the turian government would accept the human ceremony, they should just bypass the turian part altogether. Garrus waited anxiously for the procession to march down the aisle, starting with the flower girl who would precede the bride.

…and waited…

…and waited…

Finally, after the longest 30 seconds of Garrus' life, he saw Ashley in a simple scarlet gown push a little girl in a frilly pink dress into the aisle. Garrus heard John chuckle next to him and couldn't hold back his own grin when he saw the pout on Lily Shepard's face as she grudgedly threw flower petals from the basket she was carrying down onto the ground as she marched down the aisle. Then, Garrus' attention returned to the door at the end of the aisle and his breath caught in his throat.

Alice walked down the aisle, arm in arm with her father. She was dressed in a flowing white evening gown that clung to her curves perfectly, the fabric glittering in the light. She wore a white quarian shawl loosely over her head. In her hands was a bouquet of flowers from both Earth and Palaven. Her gleaming, lightly tanned skin looked flawless; her face was beautiful enough to make even the genetically perfect Miranda jealous. Her vibrant blue eyes, identical to her brother's, yet somehow so much more beautiful, sparkled behind her dark lashes and her cherry red lips were pulled into a soft smile directed solely at Garrus. He stood there, gapping and speechless as Alice approached him. Finally, with a nudge from John, Garrus came back to himself and closed his mouth, his mandibles fluttering into a broad smile.

Alice reached the arch and moved from her father's side to stand beside Garrus, flashing him a grin as she lowered her shawl to her shoulders, revealing her perfect midnight black hair. "So, how do I look?" she asked him quietly as she linked her hand with his.

"Well… your hair looks good… and your waist is… very supportive…" Garrus chuckled as Alice playfully swatted him on the arm with the bouquet. He was so absorbed in Alice that he didn't even register Ashley, as the Maid of Honor, walk up and take her spot beside Alice, relieving her of the bouquet. Hackett started "We are gathered here today to celebrate in the union of Alice Hannah Shepard, and Garrus Aeitus Vakarian Jr." (John, oh-so-subtly stomped on Wrex's foot when he snickered at learning Garrus was a junior) "and in the symbolic union of turians and humans…"

You could practically hear everyone in the room suppress a groan when Hackett went on to describe how Garrus and Alice's marriage could only strengthen the bond between the Turian Hierarchy and the Systems Alliance, putting on a show for the media. Finally after he had completed his speech, Hackett turned to Garrus "Do you, Garrus Vakarian, take this woman to be your wife, to protect and cherish, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?"

"I do." Garrus had never meant two words more in his whole life.

"Do you, Alice Shepard, take this man- er, turian to be your husband, to protect and cherish, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?"

"I do." Alice's eyes never left Garrus' as she spoke.

Hackett smiled, or came close to it as anyone had ever seen from him. "Then by the power vested in me by the Systems Alliance, the Turian Hierarchy, and the Council, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may-" Hackett never got to say "kiss the bride" because at that moment, Alice grabbed Garrus and pulled him into a passionate kiss. "Well, never mind then…" Hackett shook his head "I should have expected that after Shepard's wedding."

John smirked and kicked Garrus in the turian equivalent of the shins "'Ey! Save it for the bedroom!"

…

The reception was thankfully less hectic than John and Ashley's wedding reception. The only real incident was when Ken tackled Gabby when it looked like she was going to catch the bouquet, allowing for it to be caught by Miranda, who looked at the bouquet in disgust and tossed it over her shoulder… right into Councilor Tevos' food. As the afternoon became evening, the reception started to wind down. Tali was the first to leave, her two year-old son Kal having slept through the entire event. Next were Jacob, Brynn, and their two kids, followed by Miranda who said she had a lot of paperwork that needed doing, taking Oriana with her (it was not lost on Garrus that Miranda dragged Oriana off when she started talking to a handsome boy who was one of John and Alice's cousins).

"Hey Garrus," John said, getting his new brother-in-law's attention. "Me and Ash are skipping out," he glanced back as Ashley came up behind him with Lily in her arms "Somebody needs to go to bed."

"But I don' wanna go to bed!" Lily whined, the way she was tiredly rubbing her eyes saying otherwise.

Ashley chuckled "I'm just glad she finally crashed from the sugar high, I don't think I could handle her high level of energy anymore."

John smiled and turned back to Garrus "Call us in the morning, Liara has your honeymoon all paid for and Joker wants to take you there on the Normandy."

Garrus nodded, flashing John a grin "Thanks, I have to say, it feels good to be your brother."

John laughed and clapped Garrus on the shoulder "You were already my brother Garrus, this just makes it official." He grinned "I guess there really is no Shepard without Vakarian now is there?"

Garrus grinned back at John "No there isn't."

Several minutes after John, Ashley, and Lily had left, Wrex beckoned Garrus and Alice to come over and talk to him off to the side of the main party. "Congratulations," Wrex said gruffly, turning to Garrus "You're a married man now, say goodbye to all freedom."

Garrus snorted and put an arm around Alice "I think the trade was worth it."

Wrex nodded and looked at Alice "Have you two started thinking about children yet?"

Alice's eyebrows rose "We've talked about it from time to time. We know that adoption is the best option. There are a lot of orphans left over from the Reaper War."

Wrex nodded "Yeah, I suppose so."

Garrus' eyes narrowed "Why do you ask Wrex?"

The leader of the krogan looked over to where Bakara was entertaining young Mordin "Me and Bakara have been talking, and we think that it would be best if Mordin was raised away from other krogan. He's too… small…" he looked back at Garrus and Alice "And for political reasons it would be best if I didn't have a runt as my heir."

"You're saying that you don't want Mordin?" Alice said sharply.

Wrex sighed "I knew you would think that. I'm saying that it would be better for him, and everyone else, if he didn't grow up on Tuchanka." Garrus saw sadness behind Wrex's eyes as he said "The docs say that without the right treatment, he'll only get worse, and he won't be able to get that treatment on Tuchanka. I already asked Shepard, and he said that I should give the offer to you first."

Garrus immediately understood "We'll have to think about it." He said.

Wrex nodded "Of course, it's a big decision; let me know what you decide."

The remainder of the reception was uneventful, and when Alice and Garrus finally entered the Honeymoon Suite, it was well past midnight. Finally alone, it didn't take a genius to figure out what happened next.

Several minutes later, they were resting in one another's arms among the tangled mess of sheets. Garrus' mandibles fluttered in contentment as her brushed a stray lock of hair out of Alice's dozing face. Sighing happily, Alice cuddled closer to Garrus' chest, their naked bodies pressed flush against each other beneath the blankets. Garrus took her hand that wearing the ring in his and raised it to his lip-plates, kissing it. My wife.

Alice smiled, still not opening her eyes "You're not going to do that every night are you?"

"That depends," Garrus whispered "Do you like it?"

Alice giggled "A little."

Garrus grinned and leaned forward to kiss Alice tenderly on the lips "I love you."

Alice opened her eyes and smiled at Garrus "I love you too." They lay together in comfortable silence for several more minutes before Alice spoke again "So… have you thought any more about Wrex's offer?"

Garrus blinked "You mean about adopting Mordin?" Alice nodded "Dear, we just got married, I'd rather wait on having kids until after the Honeymoon."

Alice chuckled "Fair enough, but after?" she met Garrus' eyes "You know he won't survive on Tuchanka among clan Urdnot."

Garrus sighed; he knew that Mordin was a genetic rarity among krogan, most likely due to his mother's own genetic tampering. Smaller than the average krogan at his age and with a weakened immune system, he had only lived to his third year because his parents had kept him on the Citadel. "Tell you what," Garrus said finally "we find a nice place to live on the Citadel with enough room for a young krogan to grow and we'll take Wrex up on his offer."

Alice smiled "Sounds like a plan."

They resumed cuddling, allowing themselves to slowly drift off to sleep in one another's arms. After an indiscernible amount of time had passed, Garrus was roused from his slumber when he heard voices in the hall outside their suite. He dismissed the noise. Probably just somebody looking for their room.

Then the door blew in.

In a flash, Garrus was awake and sprung from the bed, ready for combat. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Alice do the same. He saw several dark figures rush into the room and he heard someone shout "Get the human!"

His protective instincts ignited deep inside him. Releasing a snarl, he charged at the figures. He closed in on the nearest form and was about to tear into it with his talons, never mind that he had previously blunted the tips so that he wouldn't hurt Alice, when he felt a sharp prick in his neck. Garrus roared and swung wildly, throwing the assailant who had flanked him across the suite. He reached up and removed the syringe from his neck, just as he started to feel dizzy. Drugged. He toppled over and distantly heard Alice calling his name. He saw the flare of her biotics and just as he fell into darkness his last thought was, Somebody's gonna pay.

…

"…garrus…"

Go away.

"…Garrus…"

Quiet, I'm trying to sleep.

"Garrus!"

It's the day after my wedding, can't I just sleep in with my wi-

ALICE!

Garrus' eyes flew open and he looked at his surroundings. He was lying on his side in what remained of the suite. John was leaning over him, "About damn time!" John said. "I've been trying to wake you for half an hour!"

Garrus looked around, frantically searching "Where's Alice?"

John's expression darkened "She's gone Garrus, they took her."

A/N: As always, please let me know what I did well and what I can improve on!