Disclaimer: All rights to Tony Ground and the BBC.
Author's notes: This is my first Our girl fanfiction and I'm so nervous about publishing it. I'm 17 years old from Sweden so my english isn't the best. I have really tried to write this best possible. Sorry if there still is some wrongs but I hope it's ok at least. I would love to get reviews because I want to get better and you guys are probably better than me ;)
Captain James was on his fourth tour to Afghanistan and this tour wasn't anything like the ones before. For the first time in his army life he had to struggle with feeling for one of his soldiers. But what could he possibly do about it, you didn't choose who to love and when to love someone.
He remembered the first time he laid his eyes on Molly Dawes. She was the replacement medic in his section because the other one had quit just before they were supposed to leave for Afghan. He wasn't happy about it, they whole section hade done training together all spring and now they got a new medic who just finished her own training. They had never met her and she had never met them, he was a bit worried about it because the medic was an important part of the team. His soldiers needed to trust her, he needed to trust her but yet, no one knew her.
You could have thought that the new medic should be shy or at least quiet at first, but not Molly Dawes…
"How long does it take for you massive cockwombles to get ready for a bloody photograph" Captain James walked out to 2-section and weren't impressed of what he saw, there was still a lot of work to do here he thought. Suddenly someone chuckled from the left, the new medic he realized. That was unexpected…
"What are you laughing at medic?"
"Cockwombles, sir" The smile disappeared from her face when she met his glaze. His short temper wasn't helping when he answered her.
"For the benefits of our legend new medic, who are we?"
"UNDER FIVES SIR"
"And why do you think we call us that?" She looked up and met his glaze once again, this time she had no hint of any smile on her face, only uncertainty when she answered his question.
"I don't know sir?"
"Well, take a look"
"They look young sir?"
"And everyone of them are in my charge and if you can't cut it as our new medic I have no hesitation un lobbing you out of the plane, is that understood?"
"Yes sir" she responded a little bit to quickly and for moment he felt bad for her… Maybe he had been to hard on her? No. She had to understand that this was no game, this was real and if she couldn't stand it, she shouldn't be here.
He smiled at the memory, if he only had known then what she was going to mean for him. He remembered that he had looked at her before he had walked back in, they got eye contact and he couldn't figure out what those green eyes were telling him when she met his glaze.
Talking about the devils…
"Boss?" Her soft voice caught his attention and he looked up.
"Dawes?" he said and tried to hide a smile when she appeared wearing her little black shorts and a vest. She looked beautiful, he had a hard time not to looking at her bare legs. He looked into those green eyes and realized that she looked confused, maybe even scared. He wondered why?
"I've been thinking boss…" she paused and it looked like she was trying to figure out how to continue…
"That did sound kinda dangerous Dawes" he grinned. A smile appeared on her lips and her eyes were sparkling.
God, she was beautiful when she smiled he thought…
"My teachers did say that if I had half a brain I would be dangerous"she chuckled.
"You've been thinking about Bashira" they both got serious again and she nodded "Don't worry about her, she's safe and you need to concentrate on doing your job here because I need you to stay safe" he said with his bossman voice but there were a hint of something more, he cared about her and she could feel it…
"I'm just worried about her, I destroyed that family boss" she looked so sad, he just wanted to put his arms around her and make her feel safe.
I'm her commanding officer, I have a responsibility to keep her focused, keep her safe and keep her alive. I need to stay focused and stop thinking about her body pressed against mine, my lips on hers and those sparkling, green eyes. Sometimes it feels like she can see right throw me…
"Don't" he said strict but still with some softness in his voice "You have given her the opportunity to live a life she never would have got a chance to do without you" Her sad face started to soft and he continued "I told you that we don't get to be emotional involved but you have taught me that we already are. We all are and you taught me that, not four tours to Afghan, you. You have opened my mind Molly Dawes" he looked at her and she met his glaze, they stood there looking deep in to each others eyes for what felt like forever.
No James, you can't, you shouldn't but he lost his ability to control himself. She just stood there with her brown hair falling over her bare shoulders and he couldn't help it, he just couldn't stop it.
He took two step forward and embraced her in to his arm. He felt her body against his and she raised her head, met his eyes and their lips touched, softly…
This moment, right here, right now, this moment were perfect. This beautiful women in his arms, laying with her head on his chest, breathing softly. He completely forget about the world outside the tent, 2-section, his commanding officers, the talibans and the war that was going on. He twirled her hair around his fingers and placed an gently kiss on the top of her head. He inhaled her soft, sweet smell and wondered how she could smell so good in this heat, sweating around in full military kit all day long.
"Boss?" Her voice was soft with a sting of unsureness, he pulled her tighter to him, he didn't want her to feel unsure about a thing. He wanted her to feel safe.
"Yes, Dawesy?" She giggled and her tiny hands moved over his chest, around his neck and pulling her fingers through his curly hair and continued with saying.
"You called me Dawesy boss, I'm clearly winning you with my charm and magnificent" she giggled again.
"Clearly" He smiled but soon got serious again and asked "What did you have on your mind Dawse?" She turned around, looked straight at him and said.
"Isn't love stronger then army regulations, Boss?" He froze and went quiet, she waited and he felt that he needed to give her an answer. But what should he answer her?
"Nothing is stronger then army regulations" He know that he was telling her the truth, but wondered if he still believed it himself. She crawled out from his arms and sat up in the bed. Her hair were free and fell soft over her naked back he putted a hand on the lower of her back, felt the warmth of her body but she moved away from his touch. A sting of pain went throw his body, he know he had hurted her with his words, but he was her commanding officer. Right, he was her commanding officer and he was naked in bed with her right know. He had already brooken all kind of rules.
Fuck army regulations.
"Molly, fuck army regulations. I love you. Thats all that matters right know" She looked back at him, her eyes were moist and he lifted his hand, stroked her cheek with the back of his hand.
She closed her eyes and said.
"Ditto"