Crack!Fic! WARNING! This has excess amounts of smoking marijuana! This was prompted by my husband. He wanted me to write two stories for him, while under the effects of weed itself, the first being about Harry smoking weed for the first time, and the second, wherever my inebriated] mind takes me. Here is the first!
WC: 469!
Harry Potter walked down the halls, preparing to go the the boys loo. It was right after classes had ended, and he desperately needed to relieve himself. When he reached the room, he had to cast a quick 'Alohomora,' before entering.
When he walked through, he was met with a wall of thick, cloudy, pungent smoke. Waving his hand frantically in front of his face for cleaner air, he slowly walked forward. He heard distant people coughing, and he made his way over to them. Standing in a clear sight bubble, were a group of three Hufflepuffs, Fred and George, and then, surprisingly enough, three Slytherins.
"Oh, look, it's Golden Boy," shouted Draco Malfoy, standing beside him were Crabbe and Goyle.
"Harry, what are you doing?" Shouted George. "Yeah, come here!" finished Fred.
Harry walked forward and stood beside Fred, and a Hufflepuff that he did not know the name of.
"What are you guys doing?" Asked Harry, before he was passed what looked like a cigarette, clumsily rolled.
"It'll open your eyes, Harry, it'll-" started Fred.
"-open your soul! Go on then, try it!"
Harry took a few tries, before he got a big drag ful of THC straight into his lungs.
When he exhaled, and being refused to at first try by Draco, Harry started coughing repeatedly.
The joint was passed around to each person, before it reached Harry again. By this time, it was extremely small, and everyone was holding it by their nails. When Harry tried to grasp it the same way, he was met with a sharp burning on his fingertip. When he took his second hit, he almost sucked the whole roach into his mouth.
In doing this, he started expelling the smoke that had reached his lungs, making his throat burn.
Everything was louder, and a grumbling could be heard in his gut, which was returned by not only Crabbe, but Goyle too.
Luckily, the older Hufflepuffs had thought ahead, pulling out mince-meat pies, and some pumpkin juice, followed by some cauldron cakes.
Harry greedily took two of the pies, and started munching.
They suddenly heard a knocking at the door, but, before they could answer, Hermione was stepping through.
"What on earth are you all doing in here? Oh my, it smells absolutely awful!" Hermione exclaimed.
"Come on, don't you want to enjoy the fun!" Replied Draco, offering her the newly lit joint.
"Yeah, Hermione! It'll help you study!" Fred added.
It took them a bit to persuade Hermione, but she finally relented.
That was how the Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore caught ten of his students, high off their asses, with food surrounding them, in the boys bathroom.
"Eh, better that than fighting wars," he exclaimed, before bristling off, remaining joints in hand.
Besides, Dumbledore's striking blue eyes had to twinkle somehow.