Okay, so this is setting up my first multi-chapter (and angsty) sequel to 'When Two People Cuddle in A Special Way' ...
Dedicated to you!
Disclaimer: Not mineeeeeeeeeee ... :-(
There just wasn't enough room in the flat anymore. Bollo was fed up. He'd been forced to move out of his room because the triplets couldn't all fit in one room anymore. He'd been fine about it, after all, he'd do anything for precious Vince's cubs but, when Howard and Vince had yelled at him because Richmond had stumbled across Bollo's secret stash of strictly-post-watershed magazines, he'd been furious. Therefore, it had been the ape who'd first suggested the Noir-Moon's move out and it had been Naboo who'd backed him up a few days later when he discovered that the boys had broken into his potions' cabinet and fed it to a pigeon to see what happened.
What had happened was that Richmond and the pigeon had swapped personalities for 24 hours until Naboo managed to change them back. Of course, when Richmond became Richmond again, he was sat on top of a giant TopShop just about to try and fly and was snapped up by a hawk. Howard and Vince had go and rescue him from the evil bird but that's another story for another time. The problem was that this kind of thing happened almost daily and Naboo was sick of it. The final straw had been when he'd gone to a shaman only weekend and opened his suitcase to find none of his equipment and three little boys waving up at him.
The removal van had been massive and Vinward got lost in it twice before Howard lost patience and strapped the three boys into the front cab.
"Be careful with that!" Vince yelled as one of the removal men threw a box marked 'Vince's clothes' into the lorry.
"Alright love. Calm down."
"Love? Love!? I'm not a woman you titbox!"
"Your not a geezer? Look at your hair."
"My hair is a national treasure I'll have you know!"
"Vince, don't." sighed Howard. He was tired and fed up already at it was only eleven o'clock.
"Don't, what?" Vince asked, "He could have destroyed my clothes."
"Okay." Howard said, putting his hands on Vince's shoulders, "yes, he could have destroyed them but he didn't. Did he?"
"No."
"Right. Why don't you get in the van with the boys and I'll see you when we reach our new house."
Vince grinned. "New house." he repeated.
"Yeah." laughed Howard.
"I feel like a grown up."
Howard laughed and watched as Vince skipped off to the lorry looking thoroughly unlike a grown up. Howard unlocked the car and slipped in to the seat. He sighed as he took one last look at the Nabootique. It was strange. He felt like he was leaving home all over again, like he was suddenly taking all this new found responsibility. And, worst of all, Naboo wasn't going to be around to magic them out of any tricky situations.
"Right." smiled Vince as he slid in next to the boys. "Wave goodbye to the house."
"Bye bye housey."
"Bye house."
"Goodbye."
--
Everyone was out on the street when Howard pulled in to the drive. The house was in a cul-de-sac, full of old people and smug newly weds with family and job aspirations far beyond their capabilities. All the houses were white washed and there wasn't any graffiti in sight. Howard had no idea how they'd managed to afford such a perfect house. Vince had just shown him the picture and said;
"Like it?"
"Yeah, it's perfect."
"Good because I've bought it."
"But it's so expensive."
"Yep."
"How could you afford it?"
"Don't worry about that," Vince had smiled, pouring some wine into a glass and holding it out to Howard, "lets just celebrate, yeah?"
"Ummm… yeah." Howard had lifted the glass and downed the lot.
It hadn't been mentioned again and Howard had left it there. Vince was talking with an old woman when Howard joined him.
"This is my husband," Vince said, "well, sorta. It's not official but it's close enough. This is Howard."
"Hi."
"Hmmm." grumbled the woman. "So you're both men?"
Vince's eyebrows knitted together. "Yeah. Well observed."
"And you have children?"
"Yeah."
"Strange."
"If you think that's strange, you should have seen how they were born." grinned Vince.
"How were they born?" Howard asked.
"Don't." Vince whispered, going slightly pale.
--
"Are they still looking?" Howard asked as he came in to the sitting room with two mugs of coffee.
"Yup." Vince sighed, trying to ignore the prying neighbours as they peered through the window.
"We'll buy curtains tomorrow." sighed Howard, sitting on the only available chair.
"I can't believe you didn't think of 'em," Vince laughed perching himself on Howard's lap. "I mean, how many lists did you have? You thought of lime cutter's for god sake!"
"Essential part of life."
"Oh yeah. I don't think I could survive if my limes weren't cut to perfection."
"I'm not gonna let you use them next time you need your limes cut and then you shall eat your mocking words."
"Whatever." giggled Vince, placing his coffee down on the floor and turning so he could rest his back on the arm of the chair.
"Hey," he smiled as he slipped his arms around Howard's neck, "are they still watching?"
Howard glanced over Vince's shoulder at the twitching curtains of the neighbours houses, "yup."
"Let's give em something to watch then." he smiled, kissing Howard.
"ERGH! Dads! Get a room!"
Vince giggled against Howard's lips and pulled back to see Jones stood with his face screwed up in a way that could only be described as comical.
"What d'you want Jonesy?" Howard asked.
"Vin's stole the room I wanted and he's only done it because he knew I wanted it and it's not fair. Tell him he's stinky and he's not allowed it."
"What's he said?" Vinward asked running into the room.
"I told them you stole my room."
"I didn't steal your room. I decided I wanted it and you ran it and said it was yours."
"It is mine."
"Yeah, well… I can't see your name on it."
"I can change that." offered Jones.
"Boys!" Howard cried, "Stop! I've got a headache and you're not helping. Where's Rich?"
"He's putting his toys in his room. He liked that horrible one at the end of the corridor with the sink in it."
Howard frowned. The sink in it? And then it dawned on him…"The bathroom?" he asked.
"Yeah. You said we could choose any room we wanted."
"You did say that Howard." laughed Vince.
"Yes, but obviously I meant the bedrooms and the three small bedrooms," then something occurred to him, "which room are you two fighting over?"
"The massive one with the walk in wardrobe."
"That's the master bedroom. That's ours!" Howard cried.
"No. You didn't shotgun it!" Jones sang, pointing an accusing finger at his dad.
"Shotgun?"
"It's what you say if you wanna claim something," sighed Vince, "honestly Howard, you're not down with the kids at all."
"Who the hell are you? Will Smith?"
"Yeah. I'm the Fresh Prince of Camden." Vince grinned.
"Get off me." grumbled Howard pushing Vince until he stood up. "Let's go sort this mess out."
Vince had to physically drag Richmond from the bathroom. He'd even gone as far as setting up his quilt in the tub."What were you going to do when someone needed a bath?" Vince asked, as he finally persuaded Richmond to settle in one of the bedrooms.
The boy shrugged. "I would have sorted that out when it came to it."
Vince chuckled and ruffled his hair. "Now," he said, looking around the room. It looked massive with no furniture it in but they both knew the space would soon disappear when a bed and wardrobe and all of Richmond's books had gone in. "Jones and Vinward are sleeping on their mattresses tonight. You don't want us to set your bed up, do you?"
Well… yes, Richmond thought, he would very much like his bed to be set up but he shook his head and said it would be fine. He never was one to make a fuss. He'd always thought he'd feel very much at home in a simple cupboard.
Night seemed to come around quite quickly and that meant the lights had to be turned on and that, coupled with no curtains, meant they were living in a bit of a fishbowl.
"I don't like it." frowned Vince. He was sat on the floor leant against Howard's legs.
"Like what?" Howard asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked up from his newspaper. The TV still wasn't set up so Howard was finishing a crossword and Vince was flicking through an old edition of Cheekbone, he hadn't told the ninja's his new address yet. Howard assumed he was about to be inundated with stories of how last week's fashion was no longer cool or hip or whatever Vince said. Or that Vince was about to moan about their current seating arraignment.
"The fact that pervy old couple are staring through the window at us."
Howard chuckled. He hadn't expected that.
"Don't be ridiculous. I'm sure they've got something better to do than watch us."
"I doubt it. Did you see them? They were clearly coming to the end of their lives, they're just checking out what it's like to still be young and in love."
"I hate to break it to you little man but we're not that young anymore."
"Speak for yourself small eyes," Vince smiled, putting his hand back to find Howard's and entwining their fingers, "I'm still young and cool."
"Mmm," hummed Howard, folding his newspaper and dropping it to the side of his chair. "come here."
Vince grinned, dropped his magazine and pulled himself onto Howard's lap. He rested his head on the older man's shoulder and sighed contentedly.
"M'exhausted." Vince mumbled, allowing his eyelids to droop shut.
"Mmm." Howard agreed, moving his hand to wind through Vince's hair and pressing a kiss to his temple. It was peaceful and quiet for a moment and then;
"I bet that couple are loving this."
Howard chuckled, a small rumble in his chest. "Why don't we go to bed?"
"But it's only twenty past ten."
"Well, if you're feeling energetic, we don't have to sleep. We could break that new mattress in properly."
Vince grinned wickedly. "Come on small eyes, let's go!"
--
The bedroom to the master bedroom slammed shut and giggled 'shooshes' flooded the corridor. A few bedrooms down Jones, who'd been lying awake ever since he'd been tucked in hours earlier, got out of his makeshift bed and, clutching Baby Gregg close to his chest, made his way down the black corridor.
He knocked on a door and there was a groan from inside.
"Hey." Jones whispered, opening the door a crack.
"Go away Jones."
"How d'you know it was me?"
"Well, it's hardly gonna be dad, is it? And Richmond's safely down the hall. What do you want?"
"Can I sleep in here?"
"No."
"Pleeeeeeeease Vin." Jones begged.
"No."
"But it's too quiet in my room. I can't sleep without you snoring."
"I don't snore."
"Breathe heavily then," retaliated Jones, "whatever. I can't sleep without it."
"You're not going to leave are you?" Vinward asked, peering through his fingers at the shadowy figure in the doorway. Jones shook his head furiously.
"Fine," grumbled Vinward, "you can sleep on the floor."
"Don't be silly. Shift over." smiled Jones, skipping to the mattress and jumping in next to his brother.
"Ow! Get lost! Jones!"
"What?"
"You're knee's in my back."
"Move over then."
"If I move over more I'll be on the floor!"
"So."
"Jones!"
"Alright, alright," he shifted over a little and turned so his back to his brother, "okay now?"
"I suppose." grumbled the moustached boy.
Vinward was woken up by wriggling in his bed.
"Jones. Come on!"
"Oh. Sorry Vin. It was just quiet in my room without your snoring." muttered a deep voice that certainly wasn't Jones.
"Rich?"
"Hmm."
"Get out and I don't snore."
"You do. I'm sleeping here."
"Rich!" groaned Vinward
"Vin. Shhh. I'm dreaming about ice-cream." mumbled Jones.
"Yes. Shush Vin. Jones is sleeping." Richmond said, sliding under the duvet. "Night, night."
"Night."
"I hate you both." grumbled Vinward.
"No you don't," Jones muttered, a smile pulling the corners of his mouth, "you love us, that's why you haven't kicked us out yet."
"I'm trying."
"Not hard enough."
Angst to follow...