Story Title: Almost Honest
Author: Silver Blood
Summary: He hesitated for a full ten seconds, just long enough for one of Rory's sobs to reach his ears. He desperately wanted to be honest, to tell her the exact circumstances in which she'd caught him when she called. But when he heard the sobs tearing out of her chest, all he could do was lie.
A/N: It probably has been done before, but I don't read Rogans so I wouldn't know. I'm sorry if it's just like every other story out there right now, but I'm not such a huge fan of Logan's so I have no clue. I just love this song and I couldn't help but think of Rory and Logan when I heard it. So here we are: my first Rogan!
In the evening
Raise a glass and tell some lies
Make a pass, impress another girl,
She was easy on the eyes
She was easy
And so was I
It was late when the phone rang. Nearly two-thirty, according to the alarm clock that Logan could barely focus his blurry gaze on.
Reaching for his cell phone in the darkness, panic crept up on him. He knew who it was. The only person that ever called him at this hour. He silenced it quickly, hesitating before standing and pulling on a pair of shorts.
When he reached the couch in the living room he lowered himself carefully, as if he were trying not to make any noise.
He didn't want to answer.
He didn't want to talk to her right now, so he waited, knowing she'd leave a message.
But there was no beep. There was no sign that a voicemail was awaiting him. Slightly worried and disappointed, he started back towards the bedroom. But the silence was interrupted again, and this time Logan knew he had to answer.
Something had to be wrong.
"Ace?"
He could hear her tears, even though she was trying her best to suppress them.
"Hey... I'm sorry to be calling so late."
"What's wrong?"
"I just... Wanted to talk. I shouldn't have woken you. I'll call back tomorrow."
He wanted to agree. He wanted to tell her he was desperately tired, he needed his rest. He wanted to forget the pain he heard in her voice, push back his conscience and stop the churning in his gut that accompanied her every word, but he didn't.
He couldn't.
"No, Ace... It's okay. Tell me what's bothering you."
He waited, her ragged breaths torturing him. She couldn't speak. She was hurting.
"Rory? What's wrong? You're scaring me."
She laughed sadly.
"I'm sorry... I missed you. I guess I'm just lonely."
Logan squeezed his eyes shut.
"Me too, Ace. I really do miss you"
His voice sounded choked, and Rory knew he was sincere. But something in his voice caught her attention. It sounded like guilt.
"So... What have you been doing lately? I mean besides work..."
Logan took a deep breath. The words were there, on the tip of his tongue. Words that he knew he had to say eventually. But he couldn't force it. His heart ached, because he knew the truth would eventually come out, and it would be over.
"Logan?"
She sounded so scared. He felt the tears welling in his eyes.
"Business dinners, parties my dad forces me to go to... The usual. Except I don't have you with me to make it more tolerable."
She heard it again. It was unmistakable this time.
Guilt.
"How do you bear it without me?"
He chuckled, but it was nervous. There was no teasing in her tone.
"You don't really want to hear all the boring details do you? Tell me what you've been up to."
She was disappointed. It seemed that their conversation had been leading into territory Logan wanted to avoid.
"Um... I've been working in Stars' Hollow, at the bookstore. I forgot how much fun it could be. And I've seen Lane a few times..."
She sighed, and couldn't keep the tears from her voice.
"Luke and mom broke up again, and things are really screwed up. It's like she's a zombie. I want to help her, but she won't let me. It's hard to be around her when she's hurting so badly."
"I'm so sorry, Ace. What happened?"
"Luke said he couldn't get married right now..."
She sniffled.
"Can we not talk about this now? I'm already kind of depressed."
Logan relaxed into his leather couch, his mind racing.
"Yeah, okay..."
The let the conversation rest for a few minutes before Logan broke it with a whisper.
"Ace?"
She whispered back, although she wasn't sure why.
"Yeah?"
He took a deep breath, closing his eyes. His chest hurt and his hand was clenched into a fist on his chest. He knew it was wrong, but he had to ask.
"Do you ever think about us... In the future? Not like tomorrow or next year... I mean ten, twenty years from now."
Rory couldn't breathe. He'd knocked the wind out of her.
"I don't know... You mean..?"
"I know we're young. And we haven't been together very long... But have you ever thought about the big stuff? Like... marriage?"
She didn't know what to say. Her heart was twisting in her chest, anxiety mixing with elation.
"Do you, Logan?"
He wanted to sob. He didn't know why he'd picked this moment. It was horrible timing. Things were going to go wrong very soon, and she was oblivious... It wasn't fair to ask her these things. But he had to tell her how he felt. Before she found out the truth.
"God, yes. I try not to, but I think about everything. I want marriage, Rory. I want that with you. I wonder all the time what it would be like to grow old with you. I wonder what our children would look like, what we would name them... God, Ace..."
Rory couldn't stop the tears that continued to flow down her face. His words were beautiful, but it was the earnestness with which he said them that touched her so deeply.
"Rory... You're the one. You're it for me."
He heard hear over the line. Hiccuping sobs and sniffles.
"I love you so much, Logan. I wish you were here. I always thought we'd be face to face if we ever had this talk... And I never thought you'd be the one to bring it up. God, you're amazing."
He laughed, but not in amusement. She heard the difference.
"I'm not amazing, Ror. I'm truly not. I want to be... for you. I want to be perfect, but I'm not. Don't expect me to be, please. I'll only disappoint you."
He sounded guilty again.
Third time's the charm.
"Logan, what's going on?"
"I just miss you, Ace. That's all."
She hesitated.
"Have there been other girls, Logan? Please..."
Her voice cracked.
"Please tell me you haven't slept with anyone else."
He hesitated for a full ten seconds, just long enough for one of Rory's sobs to reach his ears. He desperately wanted to be honest, to tell her the exact circumstances in which she'd caught him when she called. But when he heard the sobs tearing out of her chest, all he could do was lie.
"No, Rory. It's only you. For the rest of my life, it will only be you."
End
A/N:
Or should I continue?