Welcome to my followers and new readers! A little bit of information that you should know:
1. I will be posting new chapters of this fic twice a week, on Wednesdays and Saturdays.
2. This fic is rated T for violence only. No sex or language.
3. There is a Trigger Warning for Domestic Violence. Verbal and physical, nothing sexual. I will mark each affected chapter (there are several, ranging from a couple of sentences to an entire chapter) with the trigger warning, and will also include a censored version of the chapter below the original. If you prefer to read the censored version, just keep scrolling down until you see the double line. That's where the chapter will begin again. The censored versions will include brief, non-detailed summaries in italics, in place of the potentially triggering moments.
Hope you enjoy!
TRIGGER WARNING FOR THIS CHAPTER. SEE CENSORED VERSION BELOW THE DOUBLE LINES.
It was happening again.
Waking with a start and a deep gulp of air, I blinked against the early morning light that was slanting through the bare window beside my bed. The dreams were back. The ones about the two boys, and the girl who looked just like me, but wasn't me. Those same dreams that I had been having off and on for as long as I could remember – which, granted, wasn't very long.
Somehow, though, something was different this time. I rubbed my eyelids with the heels of my hands, trying to connect the pieces before I was too awake and they slipped away. The kids were older again, aging with me just like they always had. Their early days of playing on the beach were long gone. But that wasn't the only change. Finally it clicked in my mind – they weren't together anymore. It had been a long time since I had last seen those three in my dreams, but in the past, they had always been together. Despite the fact that I knew they were just a product of my overactive imagination, they had always felt so real to me, which meant that the sadness I had felt from them in the dream was leaving me with a lingering sense of melancholy.
Glancing at the bedside clock, I yawned and stretched my arms up over my head. This was much earlier than I usually woke up. I was definitely going to need some coffee. Rolling gracelessly off the bed, I staggered the few steps to the kitchenette and grabbed the coffee pot to fill with water. Snippets of the dream still played through my mind as I punched the power button and heard the device gurgle to life.
Before long, a mug of hot coffee was in my hand, and I leaned up against the metal window frame to sip it, looking out over the street below. Apartments like mine didn't come with a great view of the city like those swanky, high-rise places. The only things to see here were cars whizzing by, the windows of the office building across the street, and occasionally a person walking down the sidewalk. It was still a nice distraction, though, especially if I could people watch. I found it amusing to come up with names and potential destinations for any pedestrians I spotted. It was one of those things that I wouldn't ever tell anyone else about, because they would probably think it was stupid, but I had been doing it since I was a kid.
It didn't seem to be quite enough to shake off the heaviness I was still feeling this morning, though. Maybe I needed to take a walk, instead. Yanking the baggy t-shirt I had slept in up over my head, I tossed it onto the bed and pried open the rickety closet door to pull out jeans, a tank top, and a lightweight hoodie. Once dressed, I ran my fingers through the longer portion of my asymmetrical purple hair, slipped on my flip-flops, refilled my coffee mug, and left the apartment, locking the door behind me.
The morning air was cool and damp, and as usual, smelled of car exhaust. I didn't really have a destination in mind as I wandered slowly down the sidewalk, warming my hands on the coffee mug. It wasn't like there was much of anything to see or do in this part of town, anyway. It seemed like it was mostly an area for people to pass through on their way to somewhere more interesting, and a place to live for those who couldn't afford somewhere nicer – people like me. Not that I, personally, could afford anything, which is why I wasn't complaining at all about the apartment or the neighborhood. I knew I was incredibly lucky to have someone paying my rent for me, so that I didn't have to live on the streets anymore. That was an experience that I would rather not repeat.
Eventually I pointed my feet back towards home, feeling a bit lighter than when I left. I climbed the stairs to the the third floor, and noticed right away that something was off. My door was not shut all the way, and I distinctly remembered having locked it. Most people's minds would probably have immediately gone to a break-in, but I had a feeling that I knew this culprit. Aiden. I didn't know he was planning on coming by this morning.
Swallowing hard, I pushed open the door and saw him standing at the kitchen counter with his back to me. He had on his typical faded jeans and charcoal grey leather jacket, with his bright red hair combed neatly into place.
"Hey, babe," I squeaked. Why was his mere presence making me feel so nervous this morning? I didn't think I had done anything wrong that should warrant that.
"Meli. It's about time you showed up," Aiden responded dryly without turning around.
My stomach turned a little flip. "I'm sorry," I murmured, looking down at my shoes. "I had this weird dream, and I needed..."
His heavy footsteps were crossing the floor toward me, and I jerked my head up to find his electric green eyes inches away from mine. One of his hands gripped my face hard, squeezing my cheeks together until my teeth dug painfully into them.
"I came out of my way to see you, and you couldn't even be bothered to be here," he hissed, spraying my face with saliva. "Don't you know I have more important things to do than sit around your apartment and wait for you to show up?"
"I'm sorry," I tried to repeat, but his grip was so tight that my mouth couldn't form the words. Finally he let go, giving me a shove as he did that caused me to stumble a couple of steps backwards. Tears were stinging my eyes, but I refused to let them fall in front of him. He would only mock me if I did. I always cried far too easily, and it drove Aiden crazy. Instead, I rubbed my cheeks gingerly as he stalked back to the kitchenette and snatched up his mug off the counter. "It won't happen again, I promise," I whispered.
Neither of us spoke for a long, agonizing few minutes, him leaning against the counter drinking his coffee, and me standing awkwardly just inside the door, not daring to move without permission. At last he heaved a sigh, set his mug down, and faced me again, his expression much softer now. "Sorry," he remarked casually, making me wonder if he was only apologizing for the silence. "I've got a lot on my mind this morning. I have to be at a meeting with Chander soon, and I really wanted us to spend some time together first."
I nodded meekly, shuffling my feet. "I understand. I'm sorry."
Aiden smiled that sideways smile of his, the one that made his eyes shine, and held out his hand to me. "Come here."
I obliged, trotting quickly over to him, grateful that the fight was over. Pulling me into his chest, he wrapped his strong arms around me, and I sighed into his jacket.
"I've gotta go," he said after a moment. "I'll see ya later, okay? Let's do dinner tonight."
Tilting my face up to him, I gave him a small smile and nodded. "Okay."
When he was gone, leaving only the smell of cigarettes lingering behind him, I sank down onto the bed and pulled my knees up to my chest. Across the room, I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the full-length mirror and noticed that my cheeks were still red from his grasp. An image from the dream flashed suddenly back through my mind. What would those kids say to me, if they were here? Or, more appropriately, if they were real? Too bad they weren't, though. It would have been nice to have some friends in this world that I could actually trust.
CENSORED VERSION
It was happening again.
Waking with a start and a deep gulp of air, I blinked against the early morning light that was slanting through the bare window beside my bed. The dreams were back. The ones about the two boys, and the girl who looked just like me, but wasn't me. Those same dreams that I had been having off and on for as long as I could remember – which, granted, wasn't very long.
Somehow, though, something was different this time. I rubbed my eyelids with the heels of my hands, trying to connect the pieces before I was too awake and they slipped away. The kids were older again, aging with me just like they always had. Their early days of playing on the beach were long gone. But that wasn't the only change. Finally it clicked in my mind – they weren't together anymore. It had been a long time since I had last seen those three in my dreams, but in the past, they had always been together. Despite the fact that I knew they were just a product of my overactive imagination, they had always felt so real to me, which meant that the sadness I had felt from them in the dream was leaving me with a lingering sense of melancholy.
Glancing at the bedside clock, I yawned and stretched my arms up over my head. This was much earlier than I usually woke up. I was definitely going to need some coffee. Rolling gracelessly off the bed, I staggered the few steps to the kitchenette and grabbed the coffee pot to fill with water. Snippets of the dream still played through my mind as I punched the power button and heard the device gurgle to life.
Before long, a mug of hot coffee was in my hand, and I leaned up against the metal window frame to sip it, looking out over the street below. Apartments like mine didn't come with a great view of the city like those swanky, high-rise places. The only things to see here were cars whizzing by, the windows of the office building across the street, and occasionally a person walking down the sidewalk. It was still a nice distraction, though, especially if I could people watch. I found it amusing to come up with names and potential destinations for any pedestrians I spotted. It was one of those things that I wouldn't ever tell anyone else about, because they would probably think it was stupid, but I had been doing it since I was a kid.
It didn't seem to be quite enough to shake off the heaviness I was still feeling this morning, though. Maybe I needed to take a walk, instead. Yanking the baggy t-shirt I had slept in up over my head, I tossed it onto the bed and pried open the rickety closet door to pull out jeans, a tank top, and a lightweight hoodie. Once dressed, I ran my fingers through the longer portion of my asymmetrical purple hair, slipped on my flip-flops, refilled my coffee mug, and left the apartment, locking the door behind me.
The morning air was cool and damp, and as usual, smelled of car exhaust. I didn't really have a destination in mind as I wandered slowly down the sidewalk, warming my hands on the coffee mug. It wasn't like there was much of anything to see or do in this part of town, anyway. It seemed like it was mostly an area for people to pass through on their way to somewhere more interesting, and a place to live for those who couldn't afford somewhere nicer – people like me. Not that I, personally, could afford anything, which is why I wasn't complaining at all about the apartment or the neighborhood. I knew I was incredibly lucky to have someone paying my rent for me, so that I didn't have to live on the streets anymore. That was an experience that I would rather not repeat.
Eventually I pointed my feet back towards home, feeling a bit lighter than when I left. I climbed the stairs to the the third floor, and noticed right away that something was off. My door was not shut all the way, and I distinctly remembered having locked it. Most people's minds would probably have immediately gone to a break-in, but I had a feeling that I knew this culprit. Aiden. I didn't know he was planning on coming by this morning.
Swallowing hard, I pushed open the door and saw him standing at the kitchen counter with his back to me. He had on his typical faded jeans and charcoal grey leather jacket, with his bright red hair combed neatly into place.
(Aiden is upset that she was not home when he came by to see her, stating that he doesn't have much time before a meeting. Meli apologizes, but he is still angry. She promises it won't happen again.)
Aiden smiled that sideways smile of his, the one that made his eyes shine, and held out his hand to me. "Come here."
I obliged, trotting quickly over to him, grateful that the fight was over. Pulling me into his chest, he wrapped his strong arms around me, and I sighed into his jacket.
"I've gotta go," he said after a moment. "I'll see ya later, okay? Let's do dinner tonight."
Tilting my face up to him, I gave him a small smile and nodded. "Okay."
When he was gone, leaving only the smell of cigarettes lingering behind him, I sank down onto the bed and pulled my knees up to my chest. Across the room, I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the full-length mirror. An image from the dream flashed suddenly back through my mind. What would those kids say to me, if they were here? Or, more appropriately, if they were real? Too bad they weren't, though. It would have been nice to have some friends in this world that I could actually trust.