Disclaimer: All disclaimer rules applied. The song, Daylight, is composed and played by the band Maroon 5.
Check out their latest album, Overexposed!
Here I am staring, I'll have to leave soon
Why am I holding on?
...I'm trying not to sleep
Cause I know, when I wake, I will have to slip away
...The sky is getting bright, the stars are burning out
Somebody slow it down
…This is my last glance that will soon be memory
And when the daylight comes I'll have to go
...Cause in the daylight we'll be on our own
But tonight I need to hold you so close
Natsume was lying on her bed, listening to her CD player when Mikan closed the bathroom door. She was already dressed in white silk sleeping shorts with a matched top when he raised his head to see her coming out from her shower and smiled. She sat by her dresser and took off the wrapped towel on her hair and started drying her hair.
"You know, I never thought you'd actually like these kinds of songs." he started, and faced her reflection on the dressing mirror. He stood up and connected the device to a separate speaker so she could hear what he meant.
As soon as the note played off, she wailed and sounded surprised, "You mean you never knew that they were my favorite band?" She shot him an incredulous look. "I thought you were my best friend!"
He raised his hands as if to surrender and defended himself, "Of course I knew! I just thought that these songs aren't so much like you. You're more like a Miley Cyrus beat rather than the deep ones Maroon 5 play." He returned to her bed and rested on her headboard. Then he suddenly said, "unless it's Moves like Jagger which is totally not a love song." He laughed. Mikan rolled her eyes and murmured a whatever.
She hung the now-wet towel on the rack and walked to her bed beside him, "Well it's good that you know because you-" she softly jabbed her finger to his chest, "-are gonna come with me to their next concert in two months and it's your treat." She grinned at him. "Well, that is if you'll still be here and I bet you will cause I know you'll never let me go alone, right?" He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and she laid her head on his chest, wrapping her arms around his torso.
Natsume always loved these kinds of moments. When they were finally alone and had time to talk about what's new with each other, especially with him managing his family's business and her organizing weddings. The last time this happened was when she got really ill and no one else could take care of her because her said fiancee was out of the country and couldn't take a break from work.
I wish I could be with you to the concert. And every event in your life. Every birthday, friends' weddings, reunions, meetings, shopping, meals… everyday.
He lifted his finger to the tip of her nose and teased her, "I can't imagine a highly-paid wedding organizer who can afford twenty VIP tickets for strangers yet still asks me to treat her one ticket." She pouted and dipped her head between his jaw and shoulder, "Well you love me, so…" she hummed.
For a second there, his grip on her loosened unintentionally but tightened it again before she could even notice it. I do. I really love you. He has always wanted to tell her those words, his feelings. For many years now, he wanted to let her know how much he wants to keep her for himself forever. She was already his crush, puppy love, first love and the one. He never thought he would be a sap like this just because of one woman. However, his chances to tell her were always interrupted or blocked, if you may. The first time he wanted to tell her was in junior of high school.
Natsume was reading on a branch of their favorite Sakura tree when he heard loud steps nearing the northern forest. In his peripheral view, he could see the feet of the big chick, Piyo, that Ruka always took care of. "Natsume…" he heard. He raised his head to see his best friend looking at him sympathetically, clearly arguing with himself whether to tell Natsume or not what he just found out.
"Oh." He dropped his head again to start reading his manga. It was only to Ruka that he uttered a word when acknowledging someone's presence. And Mikan, too. But Mikan is oblivious of this fact and thinks that him greeting her is impossible because all he does is tease her.
Ruka fidgeted for a bit and sat on Piyo's shoulder, awkwardly rubbing the chick's feathers. It took him probably more than half of a minute before he spoke softly. Without looking at Natsume he started, "Did you want to go to Central Town?"
At this, Natsume raised his head sensing bad news coming."Spit it out, Ruka." What's the point in finding him, right? Although he didn't really want to find out, he was more worried if the news was related to anyone special, especially Mikan. But of course, Natsume Hyuuga was never worried- maybe he did, but never showed it.
"Well… I'm not really sure. But I think I heard Kyo telling the guys half an hour ago that he's taking her out…" he trailed off, not even bothering to mention her name because Natsume knew who his best friend meant. As if their minds were in sync. And like Ruka thought, Natsume wouldn't be hearing any explanation and took off to find Mikan.
He looked at her calm face, not really sure if she was sleeping until she softly murmured, "thanks for today, Nat.. really had fun at the park.." She hugged him closer and tighter as she said that. This morning, when a few guys were checking her out in the amusement park, he was so already silently killing them in his mind. He didn't know whether he should blame those guys for even looking at her, or blame Mikan for wearing such clothes that showed her best assets- and she was only in three-fourths, jeans and Chucks!
He smiled and remembered how Mikan always got to his nerves, even without trying. No matter what she did, and whoever she did it with, it was always an issue to Natsume. When he found out that boys were starting to talk to her and ask her out, he thought he would lose his mind.
There were loud whistle-blows he heard as he neared the mini-forest where Mikan was seated with the girls of Class B. The noise was coming from another table where Kyo and his basketball team mates were seated. The boys were teasing Kyo as he was nearing Mikan's seat, clearly to do the deed of his well-said arrogance. But even before Kyo could touch her shoulder, Natsume already grabbed his wrist and twisted it while covering the boy's mouth with his free hand.
The girls who were faced to Mikan could clearly see what was happening, and Natsume was throwing that a look to keep them quiet so Mikan would stay clueless to chaos happening behind her. 'Thank the gods of Olympus she's wearing earphones. Saves so much explanations.'
Natsume continued to push the boy far enough so both the girls and the basketball team would not hear what he has to say. "Listen here, Matsumoto. I don't care what rumors you spread, but I don't want any of your filthy body near her-" Kyo threw him a well-acted confused look as if to ask who he meant, "-oh don't give me that shit. And if you say a single lie about her or if she hears about what I am saying right now, don't even bother coming out of your dorm room."
The boy nodded profusely so Natsume would let go of his wrists that were starting to numb and silently noted to never, ever touch or talk to Mikan again.
He chuckled softly at the memory. He felt so proud back then when he could stop a boy's advance on Mikan and successfully hid it from her. He didn't feel the need to let her know how perfect she was especially when he teases her otherwise, all the time.
However, he never thought that entering university would mean being more protective of her more. Since then, he was set like a robot who always pushed any guy away who ever tried touching a strand of her hair or breathed her same air. Although he knew it would be impossible to brush all boys away, he still tried.
He wasn't oblivious of the fact that Mikan was and is a very beautiful woman, even more charming with her naiveté, and that boys could be lining up just to spend time with her. Of course, he wouldn't allow his Mikan to be used. Yes, HIS Mikan. And yet, Mikan was fine with this. Besides the fact that she didn't really like boys in general, she also liked the idea that her bestfriend took care of them for her.
Until their third year into college, Natsume got too busy with his course and had lesser free time since he entered university. As much as possible though, he still found way to escape his schedule and take her out. But Mikan misses the feeling of being taken care of, so when the first person who offered her some company showed sincerity, she immediately got bitten. Mikan unknowingly found the feeling she missed when Natsume was away.
It took more than a month for Natsume about this new guy, and he had to hear from the loud mouthed Koko. He found out that this guy- Akira Tonouchi- was a senior and had the history of chasing women and threw them away when he got what he wanted. As soon as he found out about this, he ran to Mikan and made sure of what he just found out. Unfortunately, it was true and she was already going out with that Tonouchi.
Of course Natsume didn't give up, but with his less-than-few free time, he didn't know whether he could actually take back Mikan and finally tell her how he feels. But it took him years before he finally had the courage to tell her and when he was about to, she had to interrupt with the announcement of her life. The bastard, Tonouchi proposed. Who would have known?
Natsume didn't know whether he should lie and act like he just heard the happiest thing in her life, or shake her off and tell her to break the engagement and stay with him because he has loved her all his life. But he didn't want to lose his friendship with Mikan and by telling her to break off the engagement, might as well break off their friendship then. He still wouldn't believe though that Tonouchi was serious and probably want something else from her. If he does break her heart and make her cry, then he's gonna break his face and make him suffer.
Apparently, her announcement happened just a week ago. The day after he got the worst news of his life, his mother asked him manage the branch they had in Paris; the branch he proposed a few years ago and finally got to manage it. He didn't know if he should think of this as a good news, but considering his losing relationship with Mikan- the only thing that made him actually stay in the country- he just wanted to grab the chance and stay away. So with great reluctance, he booked a flight set in a week after the order was given.
"Really? That's great!" Mikan cheered when she heard the news."You've always wanted to manage your first proposal!" She hugged him and stayed there for a few seconds.
Mikan's reaction confused Natsume more, he didn't know if he should be happy because she was happy or be sad because maybe she wanted him away. Instead, he hugged her back and said, "Thanks Polka*."
She took a step back and looked at him with a pout, "Are you gonna leave soon? Can you at least stay for the engagement?"
Natsume didn't tell her that he would be leaving in two days, rather he had her expect that it wasn't planned yet since he had to finish a few things in the country. He wasn't really lying though, only that unplanned part since he was leaving tomorrow morning.
This is gonna be the last time I get to hold her.
Natsume stayed awake until dawn, just watching her sleep. Savoring the last moment he could have her close. Although he didn't have the chance to confess, he still saw the woman he loved happy with her choice. I just hope you don't regret your choice forever. He may not be able to keep an eye on her, but he still had friends who would do that for him. You don't deserve to get hurt.
He wiped the tears he failed to notice and smiled, embarrassed to actually cry for such a reason. He looked at the clock on her side-table and closed his eyes with a big but quiet sigh. It's time. He knew his choice would probably hurt Mikan as much as it hurts him to leave her. Knew that when she wakes up alone and will probably never see Natsume again, she'll be crying for weeks just to bring him back. But eventually the feeling will go, with the help of her fiancee who I learned to slightly but not completely trust, and their best friends who knew what really happened.
He slowly and quietly set Mikan on her bed and covered her with a blanket. He took a pen and paper from her drawer and wrote his last note.
"Mikan. Sorry I didn't wake you before I left, you looked too cute to be woken up. But I had to leave you a note, because I don't think we might meet again soon."
"The truth is, when I found out about the order for Paris, I already had a flight booked for this morning. Mikan, I had to leave because I wanted to stay away from you. The day you told me you were getting married, I was supposed to confess but then I found out that Akira proposed. I didn't know if I should be happy or disappointed, but then i figured whatever makes you happy then i'm happy. Mikan I just wan you to know that I love you. I have loved you since high school, when I found you crying because you had a fight with your mom. When you ran to me in college because you couldn't understand your Calculus homework. When you knocked at my door at two in the morning because you locked yourself out of your apartment. Even when you avoided me because your fiancee told you so, I still loved you."
He glanced at Mikan and looked back at the note, "I'm really sorry I couldn't tell you. Everytime I had the chance, it was as if the whole world was against it. But now, I'm really happy that I got to do this again with you after a long time. I missed you so much and I love you very much. I'm still hoping that this may not be the last time you hear from me, and otherwise. Even if we get to live our own lives, I wish we could still be like old friends when we meet. But I cannot promise to visit you often because I don't think I could handle seeing you with someone else."
Natsume took out a box with a necklace he was supposed to give her on her eighteenth birthday, but kept it instead for when he would have the chance to confess to her. In the end, it still served as a confession gift but at the same time his engagement gift.
He folded the letter and placed it inside the jewelry box. He stood up and sat beside her and bent down to kiss her forehead. He murmured his last goodbye before he left her room, and left her completely.
"Goodbye. I love you."
Author's note. *Polka was a nickname Natsume gave Mikan from a memory when they first met
I just had to post this today, and before the concert. Maroon 5's Overexposed world tour in the Philippines is later tonight and I can't watch it because it's a class day. Well for subs, I'll be listening to their album all night long as if I were there. Cheers Marooners!
