I looked in the mirror. I never liked what I saw. Bet that would surprise a lot of people in my life. Half the time I just thought I was crazy, acting all perfect and hyped. Look at me. They have to know I'm a mess. But maybe they don't know me, maybe they can't see me. Even Hyde, who's been the best guy I've ever been with. Donna, my best friend, doesn't know me. How did I even get so lucky to meet people like them?
Jackie took a step back from the mirror, lowering the razor blade away from her face. She was too vain to do something as damaging as cutting up her face, besides, what good would it do her?
"JACKIE! OPEN UP THE GODDAMN DOOR NOW!" Hyde screamed, more pleadingly then angrily, as he rammed his body at the door from the other side. The door was practically shaking off of it's hinges with each strike.
Jackie turned abruptly. She had completely tuned out the sounds from the other side until now. She was almost confused, how did she end up here?
Looking down at the razor in her hand, she remembered. She turned to look at herself in the mirror one last time. "I hate you," she said in a hoarse tone, as she glared at her own reflection staring back at her. Raising the razor up to her wrist, she closed her eyes tightly, and sliced the sharp, cool tip into her skin and to her veins, listening to the sounds of Hyde crashing through the bathroom door.
THREE WEEKS AGO
Dear Diary,
I really don't remember when things changed for me, isn't that awful? I feel pretty okay about everything, I mean I'm a senior now, I'm practically engaged smiles and my mom is back. Oh, and I'm pretty and popular, so I really think I'm getting Most Adored in this year's yearbook. The other cheerleaders promised to vote for me. But here's the problem, Donna's dad found my diet pills today! He seemed really worried, which I guess is kind of cute, even for him, but he showed my mom! How dare he! I just told her they weren't mine, that I was holding them for a friend. Mom seems to understand. But then again, I'm sure she does.
Love,
Jackie
"Jackie I need to talk to you," came Donna's voice from behind her. Jackie, who had been laying on her stomach writing in her diary on her bed, turned to look at Donna in the doorway.
"Yeah, what is it?" she asked, sitting up on her legs as she looked at Donna.
"Where's those pills my dad found today?" she demanded to know, crossing her arms over her chest as her eyes burled into Jackie's.
Jackie looked up at her with the most offended look on her face, her mouth dropping open in astonishment as she raised to Donna's level, standing up from the bed. "That's none of your business, Donna! And that's none of his!" she spat out, much to Donna's surprise. She turned to leave the room after that, not really feeling the need to justify herself or her actions. She had been taking them since she was 12, who was Donna or anyone else to say she couldn't, or that it was wrong? She had been fine up until now. She was healthy and thin and everyone liked her. Who was Donna to butt into things, or her nosey father?
Donna stormed after Jackie though, grabbing her by the arm and making her turn around. "So are the laxatives in the bathroom your's too, or do I even have to ask?" she continued to question, her voice even more overbearing than before.
Jackie just glared at her. She couldn't believe how ridiculous this was getting. "So you're going through my personal things now? Donna! That was in my damn make-up bag, of course you know it's mine," she snapped at her, a vicious, cold look forming in her eyes as she shook her arm free of Donna's grasp. "You stay out of my damn things Donna, I mean it." Without another word Jackie ran off down the steps, taking off.
Jackie took a step back from the mirror, lowering the razor blade away from her face. She was too vain to do something as damaging as cutting up her face, besides, what good would it do her?
"JACKIE! OPEN UP THE GODDAMN DOOR NOW!" Hyde screamed, more pleadingly then angrily, as he rammed his body at the door from the other side. The door was practically shaking off of it's hinges with each strike.
Jackie turned abruptly. She had completely tuned out the sounds from the other side until now. She was almost confused, how did she end up here?
Looking down at the razor in her hand, she remembered. She turned to look at herself in the mirror one last time. "I hate you," she said in a hoarse tone, as she glared at her own reflection staring back at her. Raising the razor up to her wrist, she closed her eyes tightly, and sliced the sharp, cool tip into her skin and to her veins, listening to the sounds of Hyde crashing through the bathroom door.
THREE WEEKS AGO
Dear Diary,
I really don't remember when things changed for me, isn't that awful? I feel pretty okay about everything, I mean I'm a senior now, I'm practically engaged smiles and my mom is back. Oh, and I'm pretty and popular, so I really think I'm getting Most Adored in this year's yearbook. The other cheerleaders promised to vote for me. But here's the problem, Donna's dad found my diet pills today! He seemed really worried, which I guess is kind of cute, even for him, but he showed my mom! How dare he! I just told her they weren't mine, that I was holding them for a friend. Mom seems to understand. But then again, I'm sure she does.
Love,
Jackie
"Jackie I need to talk to you," came Donna's voice from behind her. Jackie, who had been laying on her stomach writing in her diary on her bed, turned to look at Donna in the doorway.
"Yeah, what is it?" she asked, sitting up on her legs as she looked at Donna.
"Where's those pills my dad found today?" she demanded to know, crossing her arms over her chest as her eyes burled into Jackie's.
Jackie looked up at her with the most offended look on her face, her mouth dropping open in astonishment as she raised to Donna's level, standing up from the bed. "That's none of your business, Donna! And that's none of his!" she spat out, much to Donna's surprise. She turned to leave the room after that, not really feeling the need to justify herself or her actions. She had been taking them since she was 12, who was Donna or anyone else to say she couldn't, or that it was wrong? She had been fine up until now. She was healthy and thin and everyone liked her. Who was Donna to butt into things, or her nosey father?
Donna stormed after Jackie though, grabbing her by the arm and making her turn around. "So are the laxatives in the bathroom your's too, or do I even have to ask?" she continued to question, her voice even more overbearing than before.
Jackie just glared at her. She couldn't believe how ridiculous this was getting. "So you're going through my personal things now? Donna! That was in my damn make-up bag, of course you know it's mine," she snapped at her, a vicious, cold look forming in her eyes as she shook her arm free of Donna's grasp. "You stay out of my damn things Donna, I mean it." Without another word Jackie ran off down the steps, taking off.