Wellllllllll, I was writing something TOTALLY UNRELATED to...Well...Anything that happened...Except maybe the first three hundred words or so.... Anyways, I don't know what happened, but this kind of....Ploof...And I was all, "Hey! That's not what I wanted to do! This looks like a one shot! And it's...What?!" And I glared at my hands and was all, WHY?! What were you doing!? That's not what was going on in your head!!!" And they mocked me...With their handiness...

Enjoypls, if you possibly can.


Boom.

The thunder rolled outside, as the storm drew closer. Stan Marsh sighed and looked out of his bedroom window as wee droplets of rain began to shift to the size of dimes, then nickels, quarters, then something like peanuts. Huge. Wet. Bleh. He stood from his post – the bed – and decided that it might be a lovely time to log on to his computer. Nothing better to do besides read – and who did that anymore, unless they did it online? Ha.

Five rapid keystrokes, and he was logged in. Immediately, his programs popped up – Y!IM, Internet Explorer Browser Homepage, et cetera. He logged into Y!IM and typed in his favorite fanfiction website. Almost at the exact moment he logged into messenger, an instant message popped up from his best friend, Kyle.

jewsmexyredhead16:hey man, sup?

Ilovewendy61:not much here dude just the rain wbu?

Jewsmexyredhead16:not much either dude so when is it supposed to stop raining?

ilovewendy61:dude idk I dont watch the weather

jewsmexyredhead16:Well yeah but...nvm so did you do that essay yet?

ilovewendy61: no way man were totally getting out tomorrow for flood watch so whats the point anyhow?

Jewsmexyredhead161:OH, I don't know, maybe you could GET IT DONE and we could hang?

ilovewendy61:idk maybe ill start it. Uhh what's it over again?

jewsmexyredhead16: It's supposed to be on the life of pi man

ilovewendy61: ya I kno that bu like what part?

ilovewendy61: but*

jewsmexyredhead16: over which story of pi's you agreed with

ilovewendy61: oh like you mean do I believe him being on the boat with the tiger or do I believe the other one he told at the end?

jewsmexyredhead16: Yeah, that one.

ilovewendy61: Okay, im starting it

jewsmexyredhead16:okay osm. So we can totally maybe hang tomorrow, my place or yours?

ilovewendy61:yours, the nazi sister is having people over since mom and dad are leaving in the morning.

jewsmexyredhead16: oh, where are they going?

ilovewendy61: I dunno, some kind of retreat. So shelly's having people over and quite frankly her friends are gross idiots so I dont wanna be here anyways.

jewsmexyredhead16: did they touch you stan?

ilovewendy61:...oh god, how did you know?

jewsmexyredhead16: I am god

ilovewendy61:lol

jewsmexyredhead16: lol.

jewsmexyredhead16: oh, and by the way, did you read that awesome new chapter that storm posted on mediaminer?

ilovewendy61: no man, you know I dont read there much..did she post it on ?

jewsmexyredhead16: idk I didn't look yet. I don't have email alerts on .

Ilovewendy616:oh well yeah its up

jewsmexyredhead16: I thought you were doing that essay?

ilovewendy61: it's called multitasking, man. Browsing fanfiction uh...

ilovewendy61: it gives me brain boosts.

jewsmexyredhead16: uh-huh. Right. Whatever, as long as we can hang tomorrow. ike's going over to what-his-face's house, mom has a hair appointment, and dads going to the observatorium again.

ilovewendy61: oh god, he's been there like a thousand times in the past week or two. Do you think they're restarting the brainwashing laser shows?

jewsmexyredhead16: dear god I sure hope not that would suck balls

ilovewendy61: oh, like you?

jewsmexyredhead16: Yes, like me, only not as well.

ilovewendy61: lol.

jewsmexyredhead16: lol.

jewsmexyredhead16: oh, hey, I gtg, the moms is calling for dinner.

ilovewendy61: oh, okay, np. Gotta read fanfic- ah, work, you know?

jewsmexyredhead16: lol yeah, whatever man.

ilovewendy61: See ya

jewsmexyredhead16: later

jewsmexyredhead16 has logged off. (18:48:24 PM)

Stan closed the window and resumed reading random fanfiction, totally ignoring his essay for the time being.


Two and a half hours later, Stan had finished his essay and read a few one-shots. Fun stuff, really, besides the essay part.

Kyle logged back in.

jewsmexyredhead16: dude my mom is such a douche

ilovewendy61: orly?

jewsmexyredhead16: yarly

ilovewendy61:nowai!

jewsmexyredhead16:yawai!

ilovewendy61:omg!

jewsmexyredhead16: lol!

ilovewendy61: orly?

jewsmexyredhead16: I should have never showed you those owls...

ilovewendy61:...

ilovewendy61:orly?

jewsmexyredhead16: *shoves a sock in your mouth*

ilovewendy61: mmphmmph! Mmphmmphmmph!!!!

jewsmexyredhead16: …

ilovewendy61:mmph mmph mmph!

jewsmexyredhead16: okay, fine *takes sock out of mouth* now, what did you say?

ilovewendy61: I said, please! Don't rape me! And then the next one was please dont stop!

jewsmexyredhead16: Hm...Where was the comma in the second one?

ilovewendy61: what does that have to do with anything?

jewsmexyredhead16: wellll~

Stan paused, and thought for a moment before replying. "Please, don't stop,...Please don't, stop.."

ilovewendy61: oh you sneaky devil child

jewsmexyredhead16: took you long enough

ilovewendy61: youre a jerk

jewsmexyredhead16: what do you mean? Im awesome.

ilovewendy61:ohyesbby.

jewsmexyredhead16: mhmm thats what I thought.

ilovewendy61: yep so were hanging at your place tomorrow?

Jewsmexyredhead161:right-o player

jewsmexyredhead16: oh snap gtg the moms is being a bitchnazi. C u 2mro

jewsmexyredhead16 has logged off.

Stan blinked at the short farewell, because, although Kyle's mom indeed was a bitch, probably the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, she was not so much of one that he would have to log off so curtly. And with such chatspeak...Kyle used it [unwillingly], but not so..severely...And if she was in a truly bitchy mood, she would have just yanked the cord out of the wall rather than giving her 16-year old son any kind of forewarning.

"Odd," he muttered to himself, and, noting his slightly raspy voice, logged off and shut down his modem, deciding it was time for a T.V dinner, in front of the T.V, most hopefully.


As soon as Kyle logged off, he spun in his chair and hopped up, and tiptoed quickly and quietly to the window. He opened it, and poked out the screen. His blond friend Kenny caught it, handed it to Kyle diagonally through the window before crawling in himself. They fixed the window back up, and Kyle made a motion for Kenny to be quiet. Kenny just shrugged, toying absently with the drawstring on his hoodie. The pair quietly made their way to Kyle's room – up the the stair, past Ike's room, and to their final destination.

Kenny pulled off his hoodie, sighing happily in the warmth of Kyle's room.

"Thanks for letting me crash here, man, I totally forgot about the whole, you know, rain thing while I was hanging out with Bebe this afternoon."

"Eh, no biggie. Just gotta make sure the 'rents don't find my stowaway," Kyle said, laughing a bit.

Kenny smiled, and looked around the room.

"Man, I remember when we used to hang out here or at Stan's every day," he said, out-of characteristically nostalgically, "What happened to good ol' days like that?"

"Uh..." Kyle said, yanking an extra pillow from the deep, dark, depths of his dresser drawer, "I dunno. I guess...Stan and you are still in normal classes, but you guys got the split, right?"

Kenny nodded.

"And I'm in all AP classes and Cartman got sent to that alternative school up in North Park..I guess we just drifted like that."

"Cartman is understandable, but...Me, you, and Stan?"

"Eh... We grew up, right?"

"I dunno. I mean, you know, seriously, but, you know, thanks for letting me crash here."

"Like I said, dude, no biggie. You wanna take a shower?" Kyle asked, out of politeness.

"Only if you take one with me," Kenny responded, smiling lecherously.

"Eh...Not my usual type," Kyle said, laughing a little.

"Aww, darn. You know, going both ways isn't really that bad..."

Kyle rolled his eyes. This conversation again.

"And what's not so bad about it?" he asked, bored, as he flopped down on the bed next to Kenny.

"Oho, you don't know already?" the blond said, facing his friend fully, with a wide, shark-like grin.

"Well," the curly-haired boy started, "I do know, but only because you've tried to "spread the love" on me about a thousand times..."

"You should really try it," the male insisted, "It's just as good as being with a chick, take it from a pro."

"Do you have any diseases yet, speaking of your...Pro attitude."

Kenny blanched.

"..No, I don't. You penis."

Kyle laughed.

"Is that the insult of the week?" Kyle asked, sitting up.

"Yup."

"Well, that's nice."

"I don't care what you say, you should still give it a try."

"You're a whore, go find someone else to love on."

Kenny looked at his friend of roughly 15 years in the eyes squarely before restarting, "Because I want you."

There was a pause.

"And your hot, supple, sweet, young..."

Kyle stared at his friend, mouth hanging open slightly.

Kenny leaned closer, so close that their noses were touching, before whispering the last word, "Kidneys."

They both burst out into gales of laughter as the last syllable came from Kenny's mouth.

After a moment or seventeen, they stopped, and Kyle wiped a tear from his eye.

"Ohh, man, you really had me goin' for a second there."

Kenny laughed, "Yeah, you should have seen the look on your face. So adorable!"

Kyle frowned mockingly.

"I am not adorable."

"Yes, you just don't want to admit it, though. The look on your face was more of a "Oh my God that's fuckin' hilarious" than adorable, anyways."

Kyle sighed, and said.

"So, seriously, do you want that shower?"

"Seriously, only if you'll take it with me."

Kyle rolled his eyes.

"Maybe one day, young child, maybe one day."

Kenny grinned and leaned down, taking off his shoes.

"Well, at least promise me this – if you ever need-"

"Anyone to practice with, call you," Kyle finished for him.

Kenny grinned, "Good boy! Now get up so I can get under the covers. You can come, too."

Kyle got up, and clicked off the lamp, while saying, "Promise you won't molest me, first."

Kenny rolled his eyes.

"I promise I won't molest you," he was under the covers, and as Kyle started to slide under, "Much."

----------------------

::looks at hands:: You...::sigh:: You guys have your own mind...

::shrugs::