It was a hot day. Like, really hot. And like, the fan was like, broken. It was knocked over by a random fangirl. But that wasn't the point.
Because there wasn't a point.
Edward: -surfing the internet- It's hot as hell…
Alphonse: Please tell me you aren't referring to the yaois with you and Roy?
Edward: ALRIGHT! FOR THE LAST, FUCKING TIME, I'M STRAIGHT. ROY IS MY ENEMY, I'M NOT IN HOMOSEXUAL LOVE WITH HIM! DAMN STRAIGHT!
Alphonse: Right on, brother!
C.V. Spike: Yeah, so they're really out of character… but you shouldn't care. If you do, go away…
Edward: -continues surfing- WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS, NOW?
Havoc: -randomly walks up- Err… not me…
Winry: -suddenly appears as well- WHAT? ED, THAT'S NOT REALLY A PICTURE OF YOU, IS IT?
-Tristin of Yugioh suddenly appears-
Tristin: MWAHAHAHAHA! –stabs Winry through the heart with his pointy hair and she collapses and dies-
Edward: 0.0
Alphonse: 0.0
Havoc:
Tristin: -disappears through a space-time continuum that randomly appeared on a chair-
Edward: Damn it!
Havoc: Umm… okay. I'm not really that sad.
Edward: Yeah, I know, but… now who the hell is going to fix my arm!
Havoc: Oh, don't worry, we'll figure something out when it's necessary…
Alphonse: -watches as the necrophiliac Seymour from FFX drags off Winry's corpse- Eew…
Edward: -throws a random container of bleach on the bloodstain-
Kefka: -sets a wall on fire and it collapses, revealing him- MWAHAHAHA! BOW DOWN TO MY FEET, BITCHES!
Edward: But I'm comfy.
Havoc: And I've got this thing about bowing down to the feet of clowns.
Kefka: Well, then… MWAHAHAHA! SLUSHIES!
-the office is randomly turned into a 7-11-
Edward: What the hell? Why are we in a gas station store?
-Billie Joe randomly walks by, singing "At the center of the earth, in the parking lot, of the 7-11 where I was taught…"-
Kefka: OMG LIKE BILLIE JOE YOU'RE MY HERO!
Billie Joe: So does that mean you'll buy me a free slushie?
Kefka: HELL YES! –buys Billie Joe a slushie-
Billie Joe: Yeah… bye now… -continues singing the song-
-The FMA characters just watch and stare-
Roy: Need a hand, Fullmetal?
Edward: WHERE THE HELL DID YOU COME FROM?
Roy: I was in the bathroom. Sorry if I'm late. Anyway, it seems you are in distress. As usual, you can't take care of yourself, can you now?
Edward: FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING FUCK! –transmutes a blunt metal object and tosses it at Roy's head- DIE DIE DIE!
-out of nowhere a herd of stampeding elephants and a three-toed sloth trample Roy-Kefka: ( They knocked over a slushie machine!
Havoc: -standing by slushie machines- Don't worry, it was just the Dr. Pepper machine.
Kefka: SWEET!
Edward: No one cares about Dr. Pepper anyway.
Alphonse: But I wanted some Dr. Pepper (
Kefka: TOO BAD! –sips an orange soda slushie-
C.V. Spike- Like give me a damn Mountain Dew slushie while you're there…
Kefka: -hands C.V. a MD slushie-
C.V.: Thanks, doll…
Kefka: No problem… but you should get back to the story…
C.V.- As I was saying…
A Random Bunch Of Fangirls: OMG LIKE IT'S FUCKING KEFKA HE'S SO HOT AND SEXY!
Kefka: LIKE IT'S MY FANS! –runs off to join fans-
Havoc: (How the hell did he get fangirls?)
C.V.: (Parallel universe so Kefka gets higher self-esteem)
Havoc: (Oh.)
-FMA crew is left alone in the slightly destroyed 7-11-
Havoc- I guess this means the Mountain Dew slushies are free?
?-THE MOUNTAIN DEW SLUSHIES ARE MINE BECAUSE I FUCKING SAID SO, DAMN IT!
Edward: Who the hell is '?'
C.V.- Just a minute, I'm still deciding!
Alphonse: Well hurry up, won't you? We're cliffhanging.
C.V.- Oh! Here you go!
?KNIVES!
KNIVES: I DEMAND YOU HAND OVER THE SLUSHIES, PRONTO! OR ELSE! –KNIVES crashes through the remnants of the ceiling, BECAUSE I SAID SO, DAMN IT, and as he does so some other stupid annoying bitches like Tifa and Rinoa and Quistis and Sara Mudo from Angel Sanctuary DIE because they're crushed by the wreckage and the utter awesomeness of KNIVES-
Havoc: -somehow managing to sip a Mountain Dew and smoke a cigarette at the same time- Or else what?
KNIVES: -stops and debates with himself- Hmm… Nyah… No… AHAH! I SHALL MAKE YAOIS OF ALL OF YOU! AND POST THEM ON THE WORLDWIDE WEB!
Edward: That's not so bad… there's tons anyway…
KNIVES: Oh really now? Well, I'll put you, Havoc, with Envy, and Alphonse, you can go with Greed, and, Edward…
Edward: What? --
-dramatic pause-
KNIVES: You get stuck with Tristin from Yugioh! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!
Edward: No! Anything but the people with giant-ass hair and eyes from Yugioh! –faints-
KNIVES: MWAHAHAHAHA!
Havoc- Hmm… at least Envy could be a chick… -debates about giving up slushies-
Vash: -dressed in ultra hippie garb- Like, love and peace, dudes.
KNIVES: How did you get here? And why is C.V. Spike hippie-tizing you?
Vash: Hell should I know… but, like, leave the slushies in peace, man. It's all in your head…
KNIVES: All in my head…
Vash: All in your head…
-things start to calm down-
-all of a sudden KNIVES is knocked off the ceiling and killed by a head-on collision with a Cherry Pepsi slushie machine, and is replaced by the badass Michael from Angel Sanctuary-
Michael: HELL YES! I WIN!
Alphonse: What were we playing?
Michael: PIN THE TAIL ON THE DONKEY! But that is irrelevant. I win. –blows up the lying people who pretend to see spirits on haunted shows- PISS ME OFF, DAMN IT!
Edward: That was random 00
Michael: MWAHAHAHAHA! –randomly disappears because C.V. Spike hasn't really reached him in her Angel Sanctuary mangas but wanted him to appear because she likes his hair-
C.V.- Myesh…
Vash: Dude…
Alphonse & Edward: What?
Havoc: Like… Stupid KNIVES got blood splat in the Mountain Dew slushie machine…
Vash: Like… my brother is stuck in the Cherry Pepsi slushie machine…
Edward: Let's leave, shall we?
Havoc: Hmmmmyeah… -FMA crew scuttles away from 7-11-
C.V. Spike- Huzzah! My first fanfic to appear on Did you like it?
Edward: I bet you they didn't. That was pretty crappy, you know.
C.V.- (
Kefka: I liked it!
C.V.- Anyway… please review it! I would love it if you would D It'll keep me writing… or not XD By the way, I'm sorry for the lack of any real plot or seriousness, but… I needed to do this, sorry… XP