Trauma, a harry potter fanfic

TRAUMA.

Author: BlackNemesis.

Translator: Angel's heaven.

So here I go!

Hello everybody! I present you a new fiction of which story takes place after Hogwarts. I wanted to write something that wasn't linked up to a particular plot but just a fic about human relationships, hard to settle after a tragedy. I hope that this story will touch you; its subject is close to my heart.

I had the idea for a long time but I didn't want to write something insulting or tout so I took my time before I start writing. Because the idea didn't leave me, I disconnected the phone and I wrote this first chapter in one go. I wish you a good reading and above all, tell me what you think of it if you have a moment, it will help me.

This fic is dedicated to D. and to those who refuse to see the tears which are hidden behind a smile.

For those who read "Sortir des ténèbres", I don't give up this fic. It's just that I have time and some inspiration to spare this week (who said: "for once!"?). For those who read "Inconnu" (1), I will send the translation as soon as possible.

DISCLAIMER: characters belong to JK Rowling, publishers, film distributors. To whomever you want but not me. I only own this story.

PAIRING: contrary to appearances of this first chapter, it is a pairing Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy.

RATING: M, once and for all M, for vocabulary and situations. It's a slash Harry/Draco, so if somebody here has a problem about homosexuality, stop now or shut up.

WARNINGS: this fiction will content some explicit scenes about relationships between men and mention about rape, no description about the rape, of course, just an evocation so if you are particularly sensitive about this subject, be warned. However, far from me the idea to become shocking; I'm too respectful for that.

T/N: it's one of my first attempts to translate a story (and a long one, above all) from French into English, so don't be too hard with me. English is not my mother tongue, as you can see, so maybe I will make a lot of grammar mistakes or things like that. If it's the case, tell me and I will correct them. For those who can read French, this French unseen can be found on BlackNemesis' profile. This fic is a very good one. The first time I've read it, I spent nine hours on it. I couldn't stop my reading. All my feelings as a victim were there, in all these chapters of life, despair, hatred, fear, pain but also finally hope. That's why I choose to translate it. Because I really think this story has to be read in other languages, and for the personal motives I've already explained. I hope that you will understand what I mean. I would thank BlackNemesis for her help and her understanding. Merci! Puisse-tu nous écrire encore longtemps des fics comme celle-ci.

CHAPTER ONE: I LOVED HIM SO MUCH.

The battle ragged. The Boy-Who-Lived turned his head on his right. He wanted to run all the way to Hagrid's hut and save him, but Lucius Malfoy and the Dark Lord blocked his way. He rained on them all the spells he had the strength to, but his mind was in the half-giant's hut.

A projecto cast touched him and he fell few metres further, letting a scream or surprise out.

He was helpless as Marcus Flint, a former captain of the Slytherin Quidditch team, entered the cabin.

The Boy-Who-Lived slowly stood up. All the muscles of his body begged for mercy after long minutes of fierce fight.

He saw Voldemort approach him, a nasty smile on his face. Time seemed to be on hold and everything happened slowly in front of the Boy-Who-Lived's eyes.

Hermione Granger overcame Millicent Bulstrode.

Ron Weasley was under the Cruciatus curse.

Lucius Malfoy entered the hut in turn, Ginny Weasley on his heels and she froze in front of the window, a horrified look on her face and tears in her eyes. "For Merlin's sake! Draco!", she yelled.

He screamed.

Somebody shook him.

He suddenly opened his eyes. Sweat blinded him. He felt a comforting hand in his messy hair.

- You had a nightmare, Harry", Ginny said softly.

He deeply breathed to regain consciousness and slow down the furious pace of his heart. It was a very long time since he last had a nightmare about that and all his body was shaking.

He died of his injuries four years ago, come to terms with grief, Harry, he thought bitterly.

- Do you want to talk about it? his girlfriend asked.

He slowly shook his head and stood up to go to the bathroom. He put some cold water on his face, breathing still halting. He looked at his reflection in the mirror before returning next to Ginny. For a long time he held her in his arms before murmuring:

- I would rather forget that, darling. Speaking of it wouldn't change anything. I'm so sorry to inflict that on you when we are living together for barely a few hours.

She looked at him and she couldn't help feeling happy, in spite of the sadness in Harry's eyes. The strong arms that were around her were her refuge and she often needed them around, especially when Draco Malfoy's beaten and raped body emerged from her memory. She never talked about this to Harry, knowing that this subject was extremely sensitive for him. She just contented herself with curling up against his finely shaped torso to listen the beating of his heart.

She examined his face. His beauty was amazing, his messy jet-black hair giving him a rebellious look. His jade eyes edged with long black lashes sparkled, expressing so good what he felt. They could probe you to the core, or shower you with an amount of gentleness.

He has changed since Hogwarts, since the last battle, four years ago. Auror Potter filled out and his musculature was set off by the satiny tan of his skin and thanks to the always well-selected clothes he wore with a wild elegance. In spite of a usual height, he was imposing and wherever he has to go, everybody respected him.

His jaws were squarer than during his adolescence but nevertheless he had kept his childlike smile, pure and mischievous.

Sadness often darkened his eyes and Ginny, who shared his life for one year, had learnt not to ask too much questions. She closed her eyes and the steady beating of Harry's heart lulled her.

Harry woke up with a start, his body shaking. He looked beside him; Ginny was already gone to Saint-Mungo where she worked as a nurse. He sighed heavily, incensed of always being stricken with these nightmares after four years.

It's strange", he thought," it was at least one year since I had a nightmare about Draco for the last time.

- Draco…", he whispered like if he wanted to keep him alive with the mere evocation of his name.

He worked his way through the boxes and settled him in the kitchen to drink a coffee. Here, he found a note from Ginny, hastily scribbled.

"Harry,

Don't forget that the party in aid of the war orphans will take place in the Great Hall of Saint-Mungo at 8 pm. I don't come back at home, so meet me there.

Our new Mediwizard-in-chief shall be here and I don't know him yet (then I don't know if he is nice or if he is a sillyhead), so for Heaven's sake Potter, don't be late.

And don't forget that we have the party at my father's home for Charlie's homecoming tomorrow. So don't go drinking too much with Lee, like for Bill's birthday.

I love you.

See you later.

Oh, I forget! If you have even one half a smoke, I will kill you."

Harry burst in laugh and he put out the cigarette he has just lit. Ginny was like a sunshine in his life since Draco's death.

Suddenly his smile vanished; he knew he has to chase away these painful memories out of his mind but he couldn't help. Draco had brought him his most painful memories, but also gave him his greatest delights. The joy Harry had felt for two years, seeing him live, breathe and even sometimes smile quietly. His deep and gentle voice when he decided of not being scathing, the expressions on his face which could go from the purest hatred to the most unbearable indifference, the way he nibbled of his lower lip when he was nervous, the so particular and so pleasant smell of his skin…each detail stayed engraved on Harry's memory, to his great regret.

Finally he lit up a cigarette and he let his thoughts wandering towards the only man he had loved, the only man who ever had attracted him physically. The man whose death had thrown Harry into a hellish world of sadness.

All seemed to go so fast in two years.

Harry had begun his sixth year dived into an atmosphere of grief and rage. He has closed up on himself and he stayed often frozen, his mind focused on Sirius Black, his godfather lost in the Room of Mysteries at the Ministry of Magic, and probably dead.

The only one sunshine he seemed to see in the surrounding darkness was the blonde, almost white hair of Draco Malfoy, his sworn enemy. He had found himself wanting to run his hand into it, at least once, just to know if his hair was as smooth as he thought.

Then came Christmas holidays. Draco went back with his family and at the start of term after the Christmas holidays, professor Snape worried about not seeing his favourite student in the Great Hall. Harry was surprised too but didn't linger on that.

He was going to leave the Great Hall when Draco Malfoy had made him the nicest gift on earth; obviously tired and in bad health, he entered, supporting Sirius on waist to help him walking.

Harry's heart went wild with joy. Crying, he rushed towards them to embrace his godfather and, with no run up, he clasped Draco in his arms. He felt a delightful heat running through his body and he understood at the very moment that he loved the Slytherin, that he probably always loved him but he never allowed himself to give express his feelings freely.

Draco had explained to Dumbledore that he had heard his father to pride himself on knowing the way to pull Sirius off the Arch which he was prisoner from and the young Slytherin went to get him out of there. Then he said he knew the dark side of his family and he wanted to know how the Light side was, and because of him and Sirius being cousins he took the opportunity.

He joined the Order of the Phoenix and he was a precious help in the struggle against evil forces. He had brought a great part of the Slytherin students to their cause and Crabbe, Goyle, Zabini and Parkinson showed themselves incredible because of their competences.

Then followed a very strange relationship that lasted till the final battle. Harry was secretly in love with Draco, feeding himself with the least of his moves, letting the least of his smiles fill his heart with a great joy, while Draco became distant, indifferent. He stayed the delightfully sarcastic being that everybody knew, but Harry seemed to be an insignificant detail of his life. He got on with Hermione, Ginny, Dean, Kingsley and above all, with Sirius.

Luna Lovegood and Lee Jordan always made him laugh, Ron and Neville annoyed him and they constantly argued.

But when it was about Harry, Draco closed himself, as if he hardly put up with his presence. Harry knew that the blonde still hated him.

Of course they talked politely to each other, they carried out missions together and everything always happened right, but Draco kept Harry away from him.

Sometimes they sat together by the lake and they calmly talked about generalities and Harry liked these moments, but when the subject became too personal, Draco stood up and went back to the castle. When he had confided in him, Sirius had reassured him by telling that Draco was surely attracted by him and that's it was for this reason he ran away. Harry liked this explanation but he found hard to believe it.

However, he didn't worry too much. He had all his life to find who really was the man he loved from all his heart, from all his soul. He didn't need to go further because he didn't want to stain the Slytherin's purity. He had to mature.

Then came the final attack, two days after the end of NEWTs.

Voldemort and his Death-Eaters had attacked outside the school. On the grounds. Many students lost their lives before Draco came into the Great Hall to take Harry by the hand.

- There is a problem", he said, pulling him outside. «Do you have your wand?

Harry and his allies had struggled with rage. Sirius and Bellatrix Lestrange fought to the death, and Harry had trouble overcoming Gregory Goyle's father. Draco had shielded Hermione with his body in order that she avoids a Cruciatus curse. Then she stunned their attacker.

Long minutes passed before Pansy Parkinson called Harry. The anxious tone of her voice made him to turn over, and he saw what she showed to him as she was helpless, lying on the ground, covered with blood and her two legs broken. Harry felt as if the time was frozen: Crabbe, Goyle and Zabini had paralyzed Draco and they took him to Hagrid's hut.

He couldn't do anything for him, too busy avoiding the curses of the Death-Eaters which rained down on him, and when he saw Marcus Flint join them, he thought it was over, that Draco would not survive to the torture of such a sadistic person as Flint.

After ten minutes, Lucius Malfoy entered the hut.

Ginny's scream still echoed in his ears. Lucius went out, followed by the four Slytherins who had held Draco, and they joined the battle.

Harry saw their ecstatic look and his heart stopped beating.

Not that", he thought," for Merlin's sake, not that.

Then he saw Sirius entered the cabin and go out with Draco's lifeless body in his arms, naked legs under his open robe. Harry knew his fear was justified when he saw tears of rage in his godfather's eyes, blood that ran along blonde Dragon's legs mixed with a whitish liquid that he identified too well. He laid Draco next to Pansy who hugged him, crying.

Harry threw back with anger in the battle and he killed Marcus Flint in cold blood, without any remorse.

Then came the confrontation with Voldemort. The Dark Lord was considerably weak because of hexes Harry had thrown to him. Harry was exhausted after having received many Doloris curses one after the other. Blood ran from his forehead and blinded him. He wiped up his face with his sleeve. All his body begged for mercy and he had not the strength to raise his hand. He fell on the ground, his face plunged in a pool of blood. Suddenly he felt a hand lying on his and taking his wand. He raised his head and saw an angel with fairness tainted with blood, hardly standing up, who pointed the wand towards Voldemort.

- My young friend", the Dark Lord whispered, bursting out laughing, which caused an outburst of pain in Harry's head," you're not strong enough to cast me the ultimate curse. You need a great hatred to do that.

- So it's good", Draco said coldly with a hoarse voice. «I have enough hatred in me to live five lives one after the other casting the ultimate curse many times a day. It shows you how I am.

Without waiting for Voldemort to understand, he raised the wand and uttered with a clear voice:

- AVADA KEDAVRA!

The Dark Lord fell, struck by the curse, and Draco tottered before collapsing, his arm on Harry's one.

Harry had woke up in hospital and he had told the Aurors and the press that it was Draco who had killed Voldemort. He hadn't thought that it was more a curse than a blessing for the Malfoy heir. Draco became the hero of the wizarding world, indissociable from Harry: the Boy-Who-Lived and the Saviour, the ideal pair. Everybody wanted to know the sordid details surrounding Draco. When you really think about it, and Merlin knows how he had thought about it, he had thrown Draco in the lion's jaws with changing him in a hero. Harry had won a certain peace but he had lost Draco.

Harry spent entire days at Draco's bedside and he didn't see the young healer falling in love with the blonde unconscious, fascinated by the damned story of the "Saviour" and his bruised body. He even told the press that Draco had been tortured and raped supposedly to pay him tribute. Harry thundered forth. He knew Draco and he knew that he couldn't stand such a humiliation. Harry made all to avoid thinking about the ordeal Draco had gone through in the hut and the one he would have to when he would be awake. But the Fallen Prince delayed waking. Healers even thought he refused unconsciously to wake up.

After a month, two grey pupils appeared and Harry felt his heart jump in his chest. He stroked the cheek of the man of his life and he froze. There was nothing but emptiness in his beloved's eyes.

He was catatonic.

Harry told him he had got the best marks on NEWTs and that finally he had been better than Hermione, but Draco kept his eyes fixed on the ceiling, contemplating an invisible point.

This catatonic state lasted two months; two months during which ones Harry attended to his Auror training and hurried up to Draco's bedside in the late afternoon. Atrocities he had suffered drove Harry completely mad. He hated the whole world and could stay prostrated during full days, brooding over his hatred.

Then an evening, he found the bed empty and the young healer told him that Draco was dead of badly detected injuries.

The world collapsed around Harry and once back at home, he let the tears he had suppressed for three months run freely.

All wizards were shocked by the loss of their Saviour, and when they noticed that nobody had seen Draco's lifeless body, craziest rumours started spreading, two of which more persistent than the others and which divided the community: first told that Draco was actually dead, the second one told that he had became mad and that the Ministry of Magic had sent him in an oriental country to treat him.

Harry had spent months plunged in a great breakdown, keeping running out the same thoughts again and again, clutching hope to see Draco again.

Then a new Minister of Magic was appointed and he shred in pieces hopes of Auror Potter. Sirius Black, who had supported him so much, had left Draco's search to one of his best Aurors, no less than Kingsley Shacklebolt. And with heart aching he told Harry that Draco was really dead.

Harry never knew how he found the strength to get up day after day, or how he passed his Auror exam. Ron was successful too and they worked at the Ministry of Magic, where Harry plunged into again.

A statue of Draco the Saviour sat imposingly in the hall. It was beautiful, made with ice which never melted, and Harry fell in love with this statue. He got up in the morning only to admire it and sometimes he spoke to it when nobody was looking, as if the statue could pass on Draco's message.

Ron, who thought that Draco was hidden somewhere, alive indeed, became very concerned and asked Sirius to remove the statue. It was a heart-rending for Harry but he survived.

Then came Death-Eaters' trial, including Lucius Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle and Zabini, where he tried out a very destructive mental masochism.

Ginny had testified of what she had seen in Hagrid's hut. She explained how Lucius Malfoy, seeing Marcus Flint rape his son, had told them certainly to not kill him after finishing because he gloated at the thought of his heir being forced to live with that disgrace, his punishment for betraying the Dark Lord.

Zabini had explained everything in details by saying again how in love with Draco he was and how he was sorry.

Goyle had testified by telling he held Draco while the others had fun, as if he was sorry for not have had the time to rape him too.

Harry was ill about that. He came back home every evening and threw up systematically. He smoked a lot and he saw the scene again and again as he pictured it. Beaten and livid Draco who screamed to his attackers to let him go.

Zabini had told that the Malfoy heir had begged them to kill him.

All these admissions created horrible pictures in Harry's mind, which he saw constantly, and the more he suffered the more he carried on, finding a nasty pleasure in suffering, as if his pain could erase his blonde angel's one. Sometimes he cried with rage and he felt guilty for not being able to protect the wonderful person he was in love with.

Crabbe, Goyle and Zabini were sentenced to twenty years' imprisonment in Azkaban for aggravated rape, anybody couldn't prove their link with Voldemort. Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy got the Dementor's kiss. Harry thundered forth. Everything led to believe that the three Slytherins had given informations to Voldemort since the beginning and nobody could prove it! The worst was when their advocates implied that they just replied the mere urge after many provocations and sexual invitations from Draco.

Azkaban had become a high-security prison, protected by powerful charms and spells and Dementors didn't guard it anymore. According to Harry, twenty years within was a too gentle sentence.

Afterwards he had searched Draco in each person he met, in each smile, in each voice, anybody who could remind him the blonde. And he never found him. He never found anybody with this hair colour so incredibly specific to the Malfoy family. He never looked in silver eyes because this colour was unique, it was the one of his beloved's eyes. He never gazed at a so white and silky skin that the one he had never touched.

Ginny had been incredibly patient with Harry and one day, he discovered she was pretty. His wounds began to heal and three years after the battle, Harry didn't have any nightmare. The Saviour statue was replaced at the Ministry of Magic and he went in front of it each day without seeing it.

Tears appeared in his eyes and he lit up a cigarette. He didn't understand why he had dreamt about these damned moments again. To think about Draco always hurted him so much. And yet he loved Ginny. He decided to change his mind by undoing boxes.

He had begun for hardly a quarter of an hour when an owl came to bring him mail. The letter was from Sirius.

"Harry,

I have to talk to you absolutely and my portable phone doesn't work anymore.

Please meet me at the Ministry.

It's important."

Harry smiled. His godfather, the Minister of Magic, was the dearest person to his heart, without playing down the feelings he has for Ginny.

He looked at his watch and saw that it was 3 p.m.

He ran to have a shower and he wore black pants which set off his muscular legs and his flat stomach. Then he put on a dark green shirt with a black tie. He rushed in the dressing room where he found no wizard robe, of course.

It's normal. They are all in the boxes. Shit and shit again!

He opened a box where can be read "Harry, clothes. You big conceited. How many are there like that?". Harry burst in laugh. He didn't see Ginny writing that.

He came across a gorgeous robe. Made of light and black velvet. A satin dragon flew on the back of the dress. Harry felt his heart stop beating and tears were welling up in his eyes. He snuffled and struggled to avoid crying. He grasped the robe Pansy Parkinson had given to him after she had sorted Draco's things. He breathed his smell. It had the young Slytherin's fragrance.

Draco, please. Go out of my mind. Why do you come back to haunt me today when you left me in peace for one year?

He threw the robe aside and caught a robe a little bit darker than his shirt, his, and he wore it hastily.

He was going to leave when Ron apparated in his living room with a sonorous 'pop'. He was pale and breathless. Harry started. Obviously Apparating didn't worth a good owl or a phone call. Indeed, Arthur Weasley, Minister of Muggle relationships had succeeded in making accept this way to communicate in his community and Harry had to tell that the idea was very good, but visibly, Ron was not at ease with the phone yet. Fortunately Harry was dressed, he who has the unfortunate habit to trail round in boxers at home.

- Fucking hell! You scared me! How are you?

- Yeah, yeah, that's good. Harry. I have to tell you a crazy thing!

Harry watched him, puzzled. Obviously his wife rubbed off on to him.

- What is that? You know you look like Luna more and more?

- Yes, I know and it's an honour. I love my wife and if you piss out of her, I'm going to smash you with a crowbar. Is it clear? After these some formalities, Harry, guess who I saw today?

- Considering your look, and considering your surprise, I suppose it's McGonagall shagging with Victor Krum.

- I don't believe you are so idiot. You're going to make me fluff my entrance. I saw Malfoy!

- Malfoy who?

- Lucius, you git. He woke up from Dementor's kiss and he's going to phone you any minute now in order to go out eating Chocolate Frogs with you for old times sake! I talk about Draco! Draco Malfoy was at the Ministry one hour ago!

Harry's heart stopped beating and seemed to go up in his throat. It was not possible. It was quite simply impossible.

- What? He asked.

- The man tells you that DRACO MALFOY was at the Ministry of Magic this afternoon! You understand?

- It's not true! You must mistake him with somebody else.

- Look. Do you know a lot of guys with the same hair colour, the same height and the same voice that your sexy boy? Well, OK, he was from behind but I tell you it was him!

- Let's recap. You've seen a guy from behind, about 1,85 metres tall and you concluded with certainty that it was him?

- I tell you it was him! He was in front of the Saviour statue and he told Sirius that if he had to come at the Ministry to work, he demanded the statue to be removed. What do you think about it? How many people do you know who don't like this statue? It's beautiful. I warn you, Potter. Watch my sister!

Harry ran a nervous hand through his hair. He couldn't believe he had this discussion with Ron.

- Ron, I love your sister. I am not in love with Draco Malfoy anymore. My life in with Ginny and to be honest, I don't believe that it's ACTUALLY Draco you've seen.

- It reassures me for my sister but right! I swear that it was him. He's more beautiful than ever, that's why I don't want you to hurt my sister.

- OK. Sure, he is more beautiful than ever?

- Yes, really!

- Ron?

- Yes, Harry?

- YOU SAW HIM FROM BEHIND! How do you know he's more beautiful than ever?

- Yeah, well, OK, I extrapolate a little bit, I envisage the worst", Ron recognized, smiling. "But don't worry, you're the most beautiful.

Harry refused to believe him. Draco Malfoy could NOT be alive. Not now that Harry had accepted the thought of never seeing him again. Not now that Harry had rebuilt his life. He lit up a cigarette with a shaking hand and Ron grabbed it immediately to crush it.

They talked a long time about Luna's pregnancy, about the feeling of becoming father. They drank many cups of coffee and ate an incalculable number of Chocolate Frogs. They had kept childish habits and they were quite proud of that. Harry didn't think about Sirius' message anymore and when Ron told him they were late for the hospital charity evening, the Boy-Who-Lived hit his forehead with his hand.

- Ahh! Ginny's going to kill me! She wanted to make a good impression on his Mediwizard-in-chief.

- Hermione in going to kill us too", Ron observed." We had promised her to be there to support her because she didn't have the job as Mediwitch-in-chief.

- Well, it's time to die with bravery", Harry ironized." Am I well dressed?

- Yeah, yeah, you're the king of wizarding spring and summer fashions! There's no one to touch you, Harry. You're the best. Right, you're glad. Can we leave now?

- Who cares? You've done better as far as compliments go, but I'll do with that. Let's go to face our death, Ron.

They were the last arrived. A great table was put up and, for the moment, all guests discussed standing in the Great Hall.

Harry and Ron took a glass of champagne and emptied one half to make believe that they were there for a while but that they hadn't found their wives.

- Forget it, it doesn't work!", a voice said behind them. «I've already done that to my wife and on top of that I got bawled out for lying. It only remains for us to be on time tomorrow to celebrate your brother Charlie's homecoming, Ron.

Harry turned over and faced Lee Jordan, Hermione's husband. They burst in laugh with a sonorous laugh that earned them many disapproving glares.

Harry broke away from the small group to search Ginny. He came across Neville Longbottom, herbalist at Saint-Mungo, who made a sign for him to approach.

A man was leant in front of him, kissing a little girl who gave him a bunch of flowers. Without knowing why, Harry admired the quality of his black satin dress which moulded his slender back perfectly. The man straightened up and turned over to see the person towards whom Neville made wide gestures.

Harry dropped his glass which smashed up on the floor. He felt as he had fallen with his glass because his legs were weak.

- Potter", Draco Malfoy noticed with a half smile," you look like you've just seen a ghost.

Harry moved back one pace, his heart fully panicked. He couldn't be in front of him. It was impossible.

He could not be even more beautiful than in his memories. Apart the fact he was a little bit taller, he had kept his grace and his charisma. He stood up with straight head, his frank and cold look and his sarcastic smile Malfoy-patented well set up on his angel face. His hair, as if they made the room look lighter, fell softly just on top of his ears. His face was still so delicate, his features were still so regular and his skin still so milky. His behaviour was still so haughty. However, something had changed.

Harry gazed at him a moment before he understands the change was in the Malfoy diamond's behaviour: he acted as if he wanted to attract whoever looked at him.

- Is he normal?", he heard Draco ask to Neville.

- Yes. I don't understand. Harry? Do you hear me?", Neville asked.

- I'm perfectly normal. It's just I indeed met a ghost. Malfoy, everybody believed you were dead.

- Sorry to disappoint you, Potter, but you must not believe everything which is told. I am in great form, as you can see. Well, how do you do?

He couldn't believe that he had this discussion with Malfoy, as if he went back from holidays. Harry was disturbed to say the least.

- I am working as an Auror. I work at the Ministry of Magic. I live with Ginny Weasley.

- Subject, verb, complement. I see that you know how to construct your sentences, Potter", Draco ironized." They are a little bit short but well constructed. Congratulations, you always wanted to be Auror, that's right. I knew you would live with Ginny. Do you have children? A little house? A car? A dog?

His well shaped and exquisitely pink lips became a mocking grin and Harry felt his heart pounding wildly.

- I just have the house", he answered." And you, Draco, what have you done during all these years? Married? Children maybe? A house? A dog?

- Nothing of all that. I'm only twenty-two and I plan to make the most of life.

- Fucking hell, Malfoy! Where were you during these four bloody years? You were believed dead!" Harry cried out, nearly in hysterics.

- Mind your vocabulary, Potter", Draco whispered with a dangerously quiet voice as everybody turned towards them. «You are speaking to the Healer-in-chief of this hospital. I am also working as a consultant at the Ministry of Magic, which means I am a high responsible and that I can put you in prison for 48 hours because your lack of respect.

- Don't mess around, Draco", Neville said. "Harry in a renowned Auror, he's not going to be sent to Azkaban with such monsters as Crabbe or Goyle.

No sooner had he uttered these words that he covered his mouth with his two hands, cheeks red in shame. Harry held back his urge to hit him for his lack of tact. He turned towards Draco who kept an unfathomable face. Only his clenched jaws betrayed his emotion. So Harry saw him doing a thing he couldn't think possible: he looked down before answering with a dull and drawling voice:

- Indeed, we can't let this poor Harry in the hands of…in their hands. Who knows what they could do to him?

He turned on his heels and sharply went away to answer to Sirius who had just arrived with his new girlfriend (A/N: me!) and Oliver Wood, former Gryffindor and now professional Quidditch player, adored by hordes of fans. As soon as he arrived, Harry saw Oliver's look light up at the sight of Draco. The former Slytherin hugged Sirius as if they never parted and the photographers present took advantage of it to take shot after shot. Then he turned gracefully towards Oliver and they shook their hands, a little bit too long for Harry.

Seeing the gleam of adoration in the eyes of the Quidditch player, Harry recalled the day, during his third year at Hogwarts, when Oliver had described Draco as"rubbish".

Visibly, you wouldn't spit on the rubbish. Bastard!

- There you are, Harry!» Ginny cried out when she saw him." Potter! You smoked! Don't lie, you stink!

- I love you too and I missed you today", Harry retorted. "I saw your new Healer-in-chief, he didn't change.

- I'm so happy that he is fine", she answered a little bit away while she was fixing Draco.

Harry immediately understood that she saw again pictures which had haunted her without she dares talk about them.

He hugged her in his arms, his look always tied to the beautiful blond and Oliver who were discussing about Quidditch. An incalculable number of indefinable emotions ran through Harry's heart and mind. After an absence of four years, Draco came back as if nothing had happened, as if he had never disappeared without trace.

He felt his hands shaking and he desperately needed a cigarette. His heart refused to calm down and he put that down the surprise. He had to rationalize, to relativize.

He was happy to be with Ginny and he was not jealous at all, even when he saw that Draco and Oliver had left the Great Hall. Harry hoped that Oliver would not attempt anything towards Draco because he didn't want him being shocked barely after his come-back. After all, he was straight and the last thing he needed was having a…tall and beautiful… Quidditch player who traumatizes him.

Harry really needed a cigarette.

- Harry, you…you don't feel anything for him anymore, do you?" Ginny asked with apprehension.

- No, Ginny. Nothing at all. I have to see Hermione", Harry lied, knowing that Ginny wouldn't hesitate to strangle him if he said he wanted to smoke.

He kissed the pretty red-head who grimaced.

- Berk, you stink cigarette!

Harry took his most innocent look and he went up to the next floor in hope to find a quiet corner where he could give himself to his bad habit and think about the incredible events of the day. It was strange the way Draco had came back to his mind 24 hours before Harry learnt he was really alive. His nightmares, the memories that had emerged, Draco's robe, Ron… everything seemed to be in place for Harry to sense something.

And he absolutely hadn't sensed anything.

He walked through a great corridor and he saw what he searched for: a balcony. But as he moved, he heard two voices too well identified.

- Draco, I want you so much. As soon as I saw you yesterday, I wanted it", Oliver said with a hoarse voice.

- Apparently I often make this effect", Draco replied with a bit of sarcasm in his voice.

- You are really beautiful.

- Shut up", Draco whispered.

Harry approached slowly and he stayed paralyzed at the sight of Oliver Wood passionately kissing Draco. His hands surrounded the blonde angelic's face and Harry felt an outburst of frustration to the core.

Draco was homosexual, or bisexual, and Harry had never known it. He sighed, knowing that even if he knew about that, he wouldn't have dared to avow his love to him.

He was fascinated by Draco's hands, gently laid on the former Gryffindor's back, by his closed eyes and by his hair which sparkled like gold threads between his partner's fingers. His whiteness and his fairness gave wonderfully contrast to the brown hair and the tan of Oliver's skin. He took Draco's hand and put it between his legs to make him touch his desire ardently tensed for him.

The blonde pulled away and looked in the eyes of Chudley Cannons captain, and incidentally captain of the British team.

- No bonds, no obligations, Wood", Draco said with an emotionless voice. "We're playing my rules and nothing will change as far as I'm concerned. We don't owe anything to each other and we do whatever we want. Good time, that's the only thing I am able to give you and I'll give you that, but I don't want to hurt you.

Well done fir the speech prepared in advance that you must tell everyone", Harry thought. "You tell me that, I leave. Does this kind of monologue work?

- No problem, Draco", Oliver answered, clearly under the spell. "I just want to spend some time with you. For Merlin's, you're the most beautiful person I've ever met.

OK, obviously the little speech works. Don't touch him.

Oliver took impetuously Draco's lips again. Then, slowly, his mouth came to smother his soft neck with kisses. Draco turned his head to give him the hollow of his shoulder, a highly sensitive point, and his silver eyes met two beautiful green precious stones.

Potter, Draco thought.

Harry shook his head with a disgusted look and he turned on his heels. He almost ran until the next floor where he finally found a place to take refuge and to smoke his pack of cigarettes. He needed at least that to calm himself.

He opened the glass door which led to the terrace and he sat down on a stone bench. His hand was shaking as he raised the cigarette to his lips. He closed his eyes and he tried to empty his head from every picture, from every thought linked to the Ghost.

- Do you know that these Muggle things are taring your lungs? ", a delightfully low and drawling voice asked.

Harry started and opened his eyes on Draco Malfoy, standing in front of him. All trace of sarcasm had disappeared from his face and Harry noticed that it fit him well. His look was gentler, deeper. He had removed his wizard dress and Harry tried to not examine his body.

It's was a waste of time.

He wore black pants that emphasized perfectly the hollow of his back. His night blue shirt made the steel of his eyes stand out. He was divine.

- I know, doctor", Harry answered with a dull voice.

Draco ran slowly one hand through his hair and he bit his lower lip. He seemed to be awkward. It was new.

- Look, Potter. I'm sorry that you saw…what you've seen. I didn't think that somebody could catch us.

- You can do whatever you want. You can have sex with Oliver, Neville or Sirius, I couldn't give a damn.

Draco opened his mouth to speak but he closed it immediately. He hadn't have to explain, nor to apologize. He was what he was and he didn't care of those who were troubled. He chose to not stay next to somebody who looked upon him as the local whore, sexy though he was, and he turned on his heels.

Harry caught him up by his arm and when Draco turned towards him, it was to eye him scornfully.

- Draco, where were you?

- On the balcony, ready to have sex with Oliver", he answered with a smile of revenge.

Harry closed his eyes, calling Saint-Patient in help. It was clear that Draco had badly taken the comment and that he tried to provoke an argument to elude the question one more time.

- Fucking hell, Malfoy! Answer me!" Harry ordered, lighting up a cigarette.

Draco took the cigarette from Harry's mouth and crushed it.

- Mind your vocabulary, Potter. And put out this when I'm here. It bothers me. I have to go down again to give my little act. Do you come with me, or do you prefer to stay here to ruin your lungs?

He held out his hand to Harry and he took it, trying to check his pulse beating which pounded against his temples. The hand held out was warm and smooth, and Harry felt his world which began to spin. The blonde gave him a devastating smile.

Harry followed the Ghost like an automaton, refusing to let him go of for fear of loosing him for ever. He had the feeling of being amputated when Draco released him almost reluctantly, as they reached the Great Hall.

Suddenly, Harry noticed a new expression, well showed on Draco's face when the inquisitive eyes turned towards him. He displayed an angelic smile, but his eyes were cold. Without knowing why, Harry felt sad.

Draco went to make his speech about the necessity to build a better future for the orphans while Harry joined Ginny, Lee, Ron and Luna as Hermione took some notes about the Healer-in-chief's speech.

Oliver Wood eyed Draco greedily and Harry perfectly knew that he tried to imagine him naked.

He tightened his arms around Ginny; he was happy for her being there.

- He doesn't look too traumatized", Ron said.

Luna looked at him a moment, an inscrutable expression on her face, then she turned towards Draco and she watched for a long time.

- Why do you say that?" she asked finally.

- Well, I don't know, he seems to feel good. He smiles and all that.

- Should he roll up into a ball and cry?" Lee asked.

- No, but he doesn't seem to be ashamed, and yet he's really proud.

- Ron, my love", Luna carried on. "You don't see anything and I'm sure that if I gave birth to a hippogriff, you wouldn't notice it. To be honest, we don't know how he feels. We don't even know if he still thinks about it and I believe that we should take off our heads that he has been...that he lived what he had lived, we're going to act badly with him otherwise. He is not the Boy-Who-Has-Been-Raped, he's Draco Malfoy. Don't forget that, Ron. He would hate you to be indulgent with him, but don't be too idiot all the same.

- I'm sorry", Ginny said with a little shaking voice, snuggling up in Harry's arms,"but I can't forget. You, you didn't see…you didn't see.

- The best thing I could tell you is to let Draco in peace and not to ask him questions", Sirius declared as he joined the group. "Leave him alone. He put this story behind him and Luna is right, forge ahead you too. And if you don't manage to do it, cope with it but don't impose your qualms on him. He has suffered enough, I think.

Harry's look passed from Draco who was talking with a group of children, to Sirius, whose eyes were fixed on the Mediwizard.

At this exact moment, Harry understood.

These four years of pain, of cries, of screams of frustration and grief…this torture he has inflicted to himself and of which Sirius had been witness…All of that could have been avoided because Sirius knew.

His godfather, the one he considered as a father and that he venerated like a god knew and let him sink into despair deeper and deeper.

- You always knew that he was alive and where he was", Harry said, holding back his rage with difficulty.

Sirius' face darkened.

- I had asked you to contact me today", he answered. "I wanted to tell you that he was back. I didn't want you to learn it like that.

- That's not what I asked you", Harry retorted, pointing an accusing finger towards the Minister, without giving any thought to his friends' eyes turned on him. "Were you aware of the place he was during four years, yes or no?

- I can't tell you anything. I'm sorry.

Harry examined his godfather with hatred and he took Ginny by her hand.

- We leave", he said simply before apparating at home.

To be continued…

Here comes the first chapter. I hope the story is not too boring. If you have a moment to click on "Submit review" and to tell me what you think about it, it would please me. It's important for me to have a return about the beginning of this story in order to know if I have to change the way I lead things.

(1) One story translated by BlackNemesis. The original author of this fic is SilverDragon1610. I translate "Unknown trials", the interlude of this fic.