Author's note:
Hello everyone, and welcome to my new story set in the universe of Star Trek Online!
First of all, I would like to assure my current readers not to worry, the Age of the Dragon is not going anywhere. I have been writing this story whenever I was stuck with Villen's adventures, and needed a change of scenery. So our dear knight's adventures will continue, I just got a bit stuck again.
That being said, this is for now just a side story I'm writing, which means it won't get as many updates probably. This may change if a lot of people are interested, but I'm not promising anything.
This story, I originally didn't mean to post until it was finished, but I was asked by a friend to do so, so here it is.
Speaking of you can go and check him out at MaliceUnchained ( u/6986077/)
He's got some good stories and is just a generally really cool guy ;]
When it comes to the lore itself, I think the most important thing I changed from the game, was spreading the conflicts its choke full of over a larger time frame. Always thought that one year was a bit ridiculous for the amount of stuff that happened.
But enough rambling! Enjoy!
U.S.S. Relentless, third ship to bear that name, floated deep inside a blue nebula, out in the far reaches of space. On the mission of exploration, the Federation finally able to return to its roots, after years of almost unending conflicts. The Relentless was a refitted Galaxy-class, its three nacelles shining brightly with red and blue light, the spinal lance breaking the sleek lines of the ventral part of its saucer, and pair of phaser cannons installed on top of it. A warship that left its mark on many fronts, and a testbed for a variety of experimental technologies and upgrades. Fresh from repairs in the drydock, the new coat of paint covering many scars she earned in war.
A young woman was sitting in the captain's chair. A pattern of dark spots trailing down her creamy skin on the sides of her face and into the collar of her uniform shown she was a Trill. She was dressed in the, standard issue, Odyssey type, officer uniform. Its shirt consisted of three colors, dark gray on the collar and shoulders, a blue stripe running across the torso, separating the last, black part of the remaining part of the garment. The same blue undershirt poked out from below the collar, a small patch just at the front. On the right side of the collar, three vertical, silver stripes were pinned, signifying the rank of Commander. A black belt with a silver buckle, the logo of the United Federation of Planets etched into it, run across her waist, helping to keep the black trousers of the uniform firmly in place. The trouser legs split slightly at the front, revealing black shoes. The only nonstandard thing on the uniform was the combadge, pinned over the officer's left breast. It consisted of two, golden trapezoids, aligned vertically, their longer sides facing each other, separated by a small gap. A thick, silver contour of a typical combadge was attached in front of them.
Commander Jidzi Grahn was looking down at the PADD she was holding in her left hand, her light blue eyes scanning over the text. Her right hand was absentmindedly running over the tip of her low tied ponytail, the brown hair resting on her shoulder.
Upon finishing reading the report, she tried to relax in the chair, but found herself preoccupied with other thoughts. They were back on the frontier again, back to exploration where the Federation's ships belonged. And yet before this ship knew only war, and the calm that settled over the bridge was something Jidzi still wasn't quite used to. Even after their extended shore leave.
The galaxy was still calming after the string of conflicts that plagued it, the last of the fighting still dying down. But they were sent out here, as a symbol that the Federation would return to its roots as a force of exploration and peace. Jidzi smiled at the thought that, it must have taken a considerable amount of effort from the admiralty to send them away, when there were still ways they could have helped. A job for other captains, it would seem.
The reason for the admiralty's difficulty was the commanding officer of the Relentless. Fleet Admiral O'Neill was not keen on leaving unfinished business behind, especially if she felt that she could help and be useful. It was the consensus of almost the entire command, including many of the captain's friends and the adamance of Fleet Admiral Jorel Quinn to finally convince her. The Federation needed a representative flagship out on the frontier again, and the Relentless fit that role perfectly. Plus, it gave them more opportunities to test the ship..
Its attendance in every conflict made it a perfect testbed for experimental tech, that needed to be tested in the field. Admiral O'Neill always supported the idea, it helped further science and, more importantly, had the potential to save lives of the crew and others. And it did, on many occasions. The ship was powerful and durable, the various redundancies in its systems making it extremely difficult to disable, and experimental weapons, like the spinal lance, and shields helped turned the tide of more than a few battles. Sometimes the reputation of the Relentless and her fearless captain was enough to avoid conflict. They were downsides to it as well of course. Advanced technology made them a tasty target of various attacks, and the significance of the ship to the morale of the fleet made sure if often took the brunt of the fire during battles. But the ship held strong, kept from falling apart by the combination of its technology, the expertise of the crew and the intelligence of her captain, as well as her unfaltering will that rallied so many to her.
Jidzi's thought lingered on the captain. She was friends with her in the Starfleet Academy, and got her first assignment with her. And on that memorable day, when admiral O'Neill, then an ensign, took command of the first Relentless, a Constellation-class cruiser when all of its senior staff were wiped out by borg boarding parties. They received a distress call from the Vega colony, and being one of the few nearby ships, they responded. The Borg attack was sudden, and they quickly spread all over the ship. O'Neill rallied the defenders and they fought their way from engineering up to the bridge, managing to take control of the ship back. With the help of the U.S.S. Adamant and the U.S.S. Independance they managed to defend the colony long enough to evacuate at least some of the people, before retreating when a massive force of Borg reinforcements entered the system.
That's when it all begun, and after that, the captain rose through the ranks quickly, and took Jidzi with her. She received the honor of being her First Officer, and she clung to that as hard as she could, repeatedly denying promotion to captain. And she wasn't alone in that endeavour. Two of her closest friends, both survivors of the Vega attack, both friends of theirs from the Academy years, stayed as well, and the three of them followed their captain through many dangers. O'Neill herself only took a promotion up to Admiral after many assurances that she could keep her ship, and still be out on the frontlines, helping the cause. That was accomplished easier than usually, everyone was needed out there during the war.
And then her thoughts took a darker turn. The captain hasn't exactly been herself recently, and despite the woman's assurances that everything was fine, Jidzi couldn't help but worry. The fact that the normally overly active captain started spending more time away from the bridge than on it, was the first clue. And there were many others. Ever since they returned from shore leave, the captain kept more to herself, her posture was more slumped, and she often looked lost in her thoughts.
She was thrown out of her musings by voice coming from her right. "Excuse me, sir." She turned to look at the young ensign, Friesinger, she recalled. He held out a PADD towards her. "I have another report for you, sir."
Jidzi took the it, and gave him the PADD she was holding. "Thank you, ensign. Please pass this one back to commander K'veph, if you will."
"Of course, sir." The young man nodded and marched off towards the turbolift.
Jidzi scanned through the report and then placed it on the seat to her right. She sighed, looking at the blue visage of the nebula, swirling on the viewscreen.
"I have to say, I am enjoying charting this nebula more than I thought I would." A voice came from the side, and she spotted Nelen Exil, a Voth scientist making his way down the ramp and towards her. They rescued him after he helped the Federation against other Voth in the Solanae Dyson Sphere. Betrayed his people to potentially save millions of lives. The reptilian adjusted well to his life in Starfleet, finding its openness a welcome change from the incredibly controlled ways of the Voth. He gave Jidzi a smile as he sat down in a chair to her left.
"Yes, I agree. As boring as I'm sure many find it, it is a welcome change of pace." She looked back at the viewscreen. "It's good to finally do what we trained for."
"Indeed." Nelen's smile suddenly disappeared and he lowered his voice. "A shame the captain is not enjoying it as much."
Jidzi let out a long sigh. "She claims she's fine, but we both know this isn't true. I have no idea how to approach her, but I have to, before the crew grows too restless. Many have noticed the change in her, not that it's difficult."
Nelen smiled. "You should just talk to her. There is clearly something on her mind and if there is anyone on this ship she will confide in, it's you."
Jidzi nodded. "I tried, but I suppose there is no harm in trying again." She placed her hand on the reptilian's shoulder. "Let's hope I can get through to her this time."
"I'm sure you'll manage." He smiled again.
Jidzi nodded. "Computer, locate the captain."
A female voice responded. "Fleet Admiral O'Neill is in her quarters."
"Of course." She muttered, standing up from the chair. "You have the bridge, Mister Exil." She said and after receiving a short nod from the scientist. She made her way to the turbolift. Upon entering it, she turned around to face the exit. "Deck 8." She said, and the doors closed with a whoosh.
Jidzi found herself getting more and more nervous as she approached the captain's quarters. She took a deep breath when she reached the door, and pressed a button on a panel next to it. A characteristic chime sounded. She waited for a response for a few moments, and after not receiving any she hit the button again. And again a bit later. "Computer, locate the captain."
"Fleet Admiral O'Neill is in her quarters." The female voice responded yet again.
This made Jidzi even more worried, as she pressed the button again. "Captain, is everything alright?" She asked through the door, a sense of urgency in her voice. After not getting any response yet again, she yelled louder. "Captain! This is Jidzi, are you okay?!" The distress she felt was clearly audible in her voice, and she hit the door several times. Finally growing frustrated she took a step back. "Computer, open this door, security override, authorization Grahn-Epsilon-Pi-5-5-3." The door slid open in front of her and she immediately stepped in. The room was in darkness, the only light coming in from the corridor, and the dimly shining nebula outside. "Computer, lights." She said, and looked around, the room now properly illuminated, searching for the captain. She noticed the back of her head, her brown hair tied into her usual high ponytail, spread over the back of on armchair. Jidzi moved towards her. "Captain?" She made her way around the chair, and noticed that the woman was staring off into space through one of the windows, a distant look in her eyes. Her dark yellow skin looked paler than usual, contrasting harder with the dark, bony spots that surrounded her face, arching on the forehead to meet and go down her nose. Her interestingly pink eyes reflected the blue hue of the nebula. She was wearing the Odyssey flag officer's uniforms, the golden and red accents as much a symbol of her rank as the five admiralty pips on both sides of her collar. But her uniform was open, the read undershirt clearly visible, the intricate belt with the UFP logo lay discarded on the floor. "Captain, are you alright?" Jidzi moved her hand to lay it on the officer's shoulder but as soon as she touched it, the captain jumped, startled, and she withdrew her hand.
O'Neill looked up at her, her stare still distant and she blinked a few times, focusing on the person in front of her. An expression of confusion appeared on her face. "Number One? What are you doing here?"
"I came to check on you, sir." Jidzi replied.
"You could have just knocked, instead of barging in here."
Jidzi was about to smile, used to the captain's sense of humour, but she stopped herself, realising that it wasn't meant as a joke. There was underlying aggression in that statement, that made her worry deepen. "I- I did, sir."
The captain's features shifted, turning into disorientation. She looked back out into space. "Oh." She said quietly.
"Sir…" Jidzi started, expressing her concern. "What's going on?"
"Nothing." The woman responded, her face turning blank, and voice emotionless. "I'm fine."
"I'm sorry, Sir, but with all due respect, that's not true. I'm not the only one to notice the change in your behaviour, and I know you, so-"
"Commander." The captain's firm and cold voice interrupted her, taking her by surprise. The woman rose from her chair. She was almost a head higher than Jidzi and the first officer had to look up to meet her eyes. "It is not your place to lecture me."
"Sir?" Jidzi opened her eyes wider in surprise and took a few steps back. But she would not be so easily deterred. "I can see there is something on your mind, and I thought-"
"Well you were wrong." The captain was getting visibly annoyed, a reaction that Jidzi was not used to seeing from the normally collected and calm captain. This served only to further reinforce her belief that something was very, very wrong.
Jidzi straightened her posture, standing almost at attention as she looked the captain straight in the eyes. "Permission to speak freely, Captain?"
"Denied." The officer narrowed her eyes at her, and Jidzi fought to prevent the look of surprise from appearing on her face. This was not usual at all. Still she decided to go all in, in an attempt to get through to her friend.
"Well tough, because I'm going to anyway. I'm worried about you, sir, we all are. All of the senior officer know something is wrong, and I'm sure soon the rest of the crew will too. You've been acting erratically recently, barely appearing on the bridge, and even if you are there, you're distant and unfocused. I have your best interests in mind, sir. But also those of the crew. Do not forget that I'm also a medical officer. As much as I would hate to do this, if you will not tell me what's wrong, I will have to ensure your health in a different way, sir." She kept her eyes steadily on the captain's, unwavering in her conviction to help her friend. Even if she think she doesn't need it.
"Is that a threat, Commander?" It was the captain's turn to straighten herself further, making Jidzi tilt her head even further back.
"I really don't want it to be. But I am prepared to do what is right for the crew and for you." Her voice broke a little. "Even if it means declaring you unfit for command."
She noticed O'Neill clenched her jaw. "Are you planning a mutiny, commander?" The anger in her voice startled Jidzi. She never heard it before, but she managed to keep her stern mask on. She was too determined to falter now.
"No. And I'd much rather not do this. So please… Please, sir, I'm worried about you. You know you can talk to me, about what's going on. Let me help you, there is no need to face whatever it is alone. No need to sit locked in your quarters. You should be out there with your crew, as you have always been. A will of this ship, that drives it forward. I really want to help you, you're my friend. But you have to tell me what's going on." She looked deep into the captain's eyes. "Please, Eilis, let me help."
She noticed the captain's features soften, the anger leaving her only to be replaced by a deep sadness. Their eyes were still locked together, Jidzi staring defiantly up at her, and she noticed tears starting to form. Suddenly the woman in front of her collapsed to her knees and buried her face in her hands, sobbing uncontrollably. Taken aback by this reaction, Jidzi knelt down next to her. A barely audible voice, broken up with sobs, came through the woman's palms. "I'm sorry Jidzi… I'm so sorry."
Jidzi leaned in and hugged her. The ranks between them disappeared for a moment and they were just two friends, one trying to comfort the other. "It's alright, Eilis. It's all going to be okay." Jidzi held her until she stopped crying. It took a few minutes for the captain to calm herself, and as she did, Jidzi helped her up and led her back to the armchair she was sitting in before. She let her slump down into it and then grabbed a chair for herself, sitting opposite the captain. Maybe slightly closer than she meant to.
Eilis wiped the final tears from her eyes. She looked up at her friend. "I'm so sorry Jidzi. I didn't mean what I said." Her voice was trembling.
"Don't worry about it. I understand." She responded, giving her a reassuring smile.
"No." The captain shook her head. "No you didn't deserve to hear that. No one did, but you especially. You've been there for me from the start, and I could always depend on you." She lowered her head. "That outburst was unbecoming of a Starfleet officer." Jidzi noticed that she tried to hook the zipper of her uniform, but was struggling because her hands were shaking.
Without thinking, Jidzi grabbed one of her hands gently, making the captain look up at her. She looked the other woman straight in the eyes, with the warmest look she could give. "Eilis, as incredible and strong as you might be, you are still a person. Things like these happen, even to the best." A soft, reassuring smile formed on her lips. "Do not focus on that. What's important, is that you tell me what's been bothering you, so we can help you get through this."
"A-alright." Eilis said weekly. "I hoped I would manage on my own but I… And I wanted to tell you but… And I didn't…" The captain struggled for words, her voice shaking with emotions.
It pained Jidzi to see ker captain in this state. The weakness was so uncharacteristic of her. She recalled many times the captain's steel, unfaltering will and quick wit saved them. The fact that she always stood strong, a shining beacon of hope even in the darkest of moments. And now there she was, curled up on a chair, barely able to speak. Jidzi gently squeezed the captain's hand. "It's alright Eilis, take it easy."
Her friend looked her in the eyes, the appreciation and gratitude clear in them, as she steadied her breath. A few moments later she felt ready to speak. "I… I am no longer in control of my emotions. My- my mental defenses are breaking down." She took a deep breath. "I think I overburdened them."
"What do you mean?" Jidzi realized that, even though she served with Eilis for a long time, her species was still a great mystery to her, and the rest of the Federation. There were only three members of the species in Starfleet. She knew that there was an illness affecting many of them, and that Eilis was one of the immune. She also knew that while most of their physiology was known, their extraordinary brains somehow resisted all forms of scanning. And from the autopsy results they got from their planetary government, they found out that, while sharing certain parts, all brains were slightly different, like fingerprints for humans, which led to many mutations, both dangerous and beneficial. And Jidzi knew that it was a somewhat taboo subject, that none of the species were too comfortable discussing.
"I'm able to consciously control my emotions." The captain's voice still quivered. "Unlike the vulcans I can… choose which of them I want to feel. This ability is meant to be used sparingly, in crisis situations. But I… The war it…" She struggled to express herself, fighting desperately to stay calm, trying to control the overwhelming emotions. She felt Jidzi's thumb move across her hand, and focused on the contact to not lose control.
"You used it too much?" Jidzi asked, her concern clearly audible in her voice. It remained Eilis that there were people that cared for her, which only gave her more strength.
"I… I had too. As a captain I had to set an example. It was difficult to see the Federation almost crumble under the pressure from its enemies. It was time to act, and as a captain, I gambled with lives of my crew every time I made a decision. I needed to be sure, so I pushed fear and doubt away. I needed to be strong, to show them that we can persevere, that we can uphold the values of the Federation against all odds. I couldn't be weak, I couldn't cower in fear from our enemies, I couldn't give into despair that tightened its grip around me… But I failed my crew, Jidzi…" Tears started running down her face again. "So many died. And now I feel my strength leaving me… How can I set an example as an officer now, when I feel my mind crumbling around me…"
Jidzie moved to her captain and hugged her tightly. "Eilis, your crew will not lose their respect for you if you show weakness. We all know you will manage to overcome it. You have kept us alive through so many incredible dangers. You were that beacon of hope, the person we all aspire to be. But even the strongest may falter under the weight of their burdens, their emotions. Perhaps it is our time to repay you, to bring you through this darkness, just like you lead us for all those years." She let go of her and knelt down next to her chair, looking right into Eilis' teary eyes.
"I don't understand, Jidzi…" She shook her head, her voice still trembling. "I don't understand why you still follow me. After so many died. After all the stress I put on the crew. Always volunteering the ship for difficult missions… Always throwing it in the thick of battle…" The look on her face grew more and more absent, the flood of memories washing over her. Another squeeze of her hand brought her back.
"You did what had to be done, because you knew your crew would manage it. You've always put great faith in us, and that gave us determination to not disappoint you. You gave all we did purpose. You ensured that not one death on this ship was in vain. People gave their lives for the cause, knowing that you will make it worthwhile. And you always did." She gave the captain a reassuring smile. "You should rest, take your time to process all of the emotions flooding your mind. And if you need anything, just let me know. I'll be there to help you."
Eilis looked at her first officer with a long look filled with appreciation. "Thank you, Jidzi. It means a lot to me." She smiled, which made Jidzi smile as well. She tried to get up, but felt drained, and wobbled on her feet. Jidzi moved to support her. "Help me get to the bridge. There is something I should have done sooner…" She moved her trembling hands back down to her uniform's zipper, struggling to hook it again.
With a nod, Jidzi helped the captain make herself look presentable, wiping of the tears staining her face with her thumb, and getting her uniform in order. Then she helped her out of her room, and lead her towards the turbolift.
"Captain on the bridge!" Jidzi said, as the turbolift doors opened, the attention of every officer on the bridge turning towards them. They all moved to stand at attention, Nelen Exil standing up from the captain's chair.
"At ease." Eilis said, desperately trying to make her voice calmer. She slowly made her way to the captain's chair, Jidzi following closely behind, ready to support her, should she stumble. Nelen took a step back from the chair, and gave a nod to the captain, and she responded with a small smile. But instead of sitting down, she turned a panel attached to the chair's armrest towards her and pressed a button, opening a channel to the crew.
"This is the captain, if I may have your attention." Her voice was still trembling, as she fought for control over her emotions. "Many of you may have noticed I… have not exactly been myself recently. It was something I thought I could deal with myself, but it looks like I cannot. I have been suffering from a rare…" She paused, taking a deep breath. "Mental affliction, and now I find myself unfit to command." Jidzi moved closer to her and opened her mouth to speak, but Eilis raised her hand to stop her. "So I will transfer command of this fine ship to Commander Grahn, for the foreseeable future. I expect you all to follow her, as you would me. Thank you for your time." She pressed the button again, and turned to her first officer. "Computer, transfer all command codes to Commander Grahn. Authorization O'Neill-Sigma-Lambda-9-8-5."
Jidzi looked at her, eyes wide in surprise. "Sir, I don't think-"
The captain raised her hand once again, stopping the other woman from speaking. "This is for the best. The afflictions of mind are… difficult to cure for my people. I don't know when or even if this will end. And I want you in command of the Relentless, because I don't know anyone better suited for it." She placed her hand on her friend's shoulder. "I want you to make a report to Starfleet Command about this. And please, Jidzi, should anything happen, remember that your first duty is to the crew."
The look on Jidzi's face turned to confusion for a moment, and then realization dawned on her. She dropped her gaze. "I understand, sir. And you will get through this, I know you will."
She looked back up at the captain, and straightened her posture. "I relieve you, sir."
"I stand relieved." She smiled weakly, letting go of her friend shoulder, and turning to leave. The bridge staff assembled in a line, marking her way to the turbolift, all standing at attention and saluting. Eilis made her way along them slowly, entered the lift, turned around to face the bridge and saluted them back. "Deck 8." She said, her voice still weak, and disappeared behind closed doors.