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Chapter 1:

1998 May

As Severus lay on dusty, cold floorboards in the Shrieking Shack, he tried in vain to put pressure on his wounds. He could feel the blood gushing from his neck and his life force rushing with it, his fingers were weak and failing him and he knew he would not survive the blood loss, let alone the poison that was numbing his body.

Suddenly he felt another's hands putting pressure on the gaping punctures he looked to his left as much as he could and saw a vague blurry outline. He must have tried talking but all that had escaped his lips was a gurgle and blood spewed out his mouth. Only when he heard Miss Grangers voice did he realize who it was.

"Shh, Professor, just relax I've got some Dittany in my bag I just didn't want you to bleed out. I'm getting it now just listen to my voice. Yes, yes, I know you can't stand it but if it keeps you alive." If Severus could have rolled his eyes he would have, she was still a blasted know-it-all. Yes, he couldn't stand her voice but she didn't need to know that the little swot!

Where did she even come from? They should have left with my memories, Potter better bloody well have gone, I didn't give them to him for nothing that little brat!

He must have been making a noise of protest for Miss Granger was trying to placate him; he could see the fumes rising from the Dittany and assumed she had applied it already as there was a slight pulling feeling around his wounds. When she put her hand under his head and started tipping it back, he frowned up at her

"I'm just going to give you some blood replenisher and anti-venom. I don't know what venom the snake has but it should hold it off long enough for you to treat yourself." She wouldn't look in his eyes he noticed.

Why is she even doing this? She knows what I've done and if Potter and Weasley have the memories then she wouldn't know the truth, so why is she here?

He was still frowning at her and she obviously had interpreted his gaze,

"I couldn't watch someone die that I could have saved. Yes I know what you've done, but you were my Professor for six years and have saved my life on numerous occasions. By the time you're healed enough to be a threat to me, I'll be gone. And you should be too if you don't want to go to Azkaban."

So she thought she was indebted to him then was that it? Severus wondered.

He realized he would be dead if not for a swotty little witch who could never could keep her nose out of others peoples business. It then dawned on him that he'd be indebted to her now and he closed his eyes and groaned. His eyes snapped open when he actually made the sound and as he met Miss Granger's gaze her eyes were surprised also and then frightened. She swallowed deeply and placed his head back on the ground

"Well I think that's my cue, I'll be going now. I've got your wand and I'll throw it back to you once I'm through the trap door." She rose to her feet and started climbing down through the door. She turned back to throw his wand to him meeting his eyes finally, Severus formidable gaze bored into her wondering if Miss Granger really understood the debt she had initiated between them.

1998 July

Hermione stepped out of the airport and looked around, it was freezing in Sydney as she had expected for winter, but the chilly air was refreshing on her face after the stuffy journey in the plane. She set down her luggage and put on her warmer coat she had kept out just in case. Glancing down at her bags she made sure she had everything and picked them up again before making her way over to the taxi rank. While waiting in line Hermione thought about Harry and Ron's reactions when she told them she was flying 'the muggle way' and it brought a slight smile to her face.

"Hermione you do realize how much easier it is to organize a port key to Australia? I'm sure Kingsley would not have a problem speeding up the process for you." Harry told her in a placating tone.

"Harry I know it would…"

"Yeah Hermione, it's just bloody barmy spending all that time on one of those planeairo things. And Dad told me they're not that comfy, my legs are going to be squashed up under my armpits!' Ron said interrupting her. Hermione froze and gave Harry a quick glance and minute shake of her head, Harry had his mouth already open about to reply to Ron but closed it once seeing her face.

"Well I'll leave you guys to the planning I'm just going to find Ginny…" He said instead slinking away back inside The Burrow. Hermione looked over her shoulder and gave him a glare before turning back to Ron.

"Ron there's something I think we should talk about." Ron turned to face her, the look on his face showed Hermione he was preparing himself for an argument.

Great start, she thought herself.

"Hermione whatever you're going to say I don't think you should say it for once. Remember everything we've all been through? I think we should just organize a portkey and…"

"I don't want you to come with me Ronald." Hermione blurted interrupting him.

Wow that felt good no wonder Ron does it all the time!

Ron's mouth was still open and his eyes widened, he snapped his mouth closed and ground his teeth his ears starting to redden.

Bad sign! Hermione held up both hands in a soothing way,

"Ron I'm sorry I didn't mean to just say it like that, but I've been thinking this since you assumed you were coming and I thought it would be fine at first; good for you to get away from The Burrow for a while, for you to have a break from everything, but Ron I can't do it. Just this once I need to think about me, I need to think about what I need, and I need some quiet, some peace, and I want to do it by myself. Finding my parents… it's not going to be easy on me, a real emotional experience and…"

"And you what? You don't think I have the 'range' of emotions to help?" He said scathingly.

"No that's not it at all I just don't want to put anymore baggage on you when you are already struggling, I think it will be best if you stay here and watch the shop for George. You're the only one that has had any real response from him since Fred passed." She soothed. Ron looked up at the sky and pursed his lips, looking as if he was fighting away the tears that were so close to everyone's surface."

"I wanted to come Hermione; just to have some time for us you know ever since the… you know, the kiss, we haven't even really talked. I don't know where we're at you know?"

"I know Ron, and I feel the same. Maybe we should just take it slow; we've been waiting this long what are a few more months?" She replied.

"Yeah I guess, look just promise me you'll stay safe. If you wanna take this plane thingy just keep your wand on you at all times, OK? Promise?" He pleaded.

"Sure Ron of course I will." Hermione bit her lip, conveniently not telling him about airport baggage checks and sensors she'd have her wand on her the whole time apart from then.

Hermione felt those tears she was always fighting well up as she moved forward in the taxi line, grabbing a tissue from her pocket she dabbed at her eyes. Ron was complicated and with all these pent up emotions so close to the surface she was glad he caved to her wishes. Having him on this journey while he thought it would be a good move in their relationship, she didn't. Finding her parents was going to be taxing enough especially when she wasn't a hundred percent sure she could reverse their memories.

It had been two months since the Final Battle and this was the one thing she had thought about since it had ended. At all the funerals she attended after the war, the thought at in the back of her mind was this could have been her, sitting at her parent's funeral. She knew it was selfish but she didn't even know how they were or if they were definitely here in Australia still.

She knew they had got on the flight she organized because she confirmed that they boarded the day after obviating them. Finding a telephone had been difficult but she managed to sneak away from The Burrow during the wedding planning on the pretense of getting 'girly necessities' from the supermarket. There was a phone booth on the corner shop that she had used.

She didn't have much confidence in their safety anymore though, because after Remus and Tonks funeral, when she couldn't handle the pressure of the inevitable tears and fled the wake; she apparated to her house and the sight that had met her eyes broke all her resolve. She'd collapsed to her knees in the rubble and ash which was all that was left of her childhood home. She knew who had done it and she was filled with rage and despair at the Death Eaters and Voldemort all over again.

Hermione was by now completely crying and blubbering into her tissue. She felt a gentle hand on her shoulder making her jump whirling around, wishing she'd listened to Ron. She met wizened blue eyes that were half a head shorter than her,

"Dearie the next taxi is yours." The elderly lady pointed with her other hand; she gave her shoulder a slight squeeze and pushed her forward. Hermione gave her a watery smile, took a deep breath and with a slight nod of her head made her way over to the taxi.

"100 Ryde Road, Hunters Hill, please." Hermione told the driver after climbing in the back with her bags. He gave a nod and drove off.

The drive took about 25 minutes and the cab driver didn't say much, not that she would have heard him with his music blaring. It had been a long time since hearing muggle music and 'Gettin Jiggy Wit it' was not the first song she wanted to celebrate after the absence. Paying the driver with relief she stepped out and looked up at the 'The Dental Lounge', it was one of the nicer dentists in Sydney; located near a suburban area it looked to be more for family and children which was similar to her parent's clinic in London.

After doing the tracking spell she had researched to use back at The Burrow, she learned it was probably not the most advance one she could have chosen, as it had shown this roundabout location. Then after searching the internet, which had definitely upgraded during her magical education, she'd found this clinic. The only problem was the charm was not a hundred percent effective it showed where the strongest presence of her parents was, but there were a few other locations she could have gone such as; their home which was just a street up from Ryde on Abigail, the supermarket, and even the actual city of Sydney had a few pointers. She'd ultimately decided to come here as it was the most likely place they would be on a Tuesday afternoon and hoped that she was correct.

Walking up the steps to the clinic Hermione had a horrible foreboding feeling that this was it; if this did not go the way she hoped, she feared it would break her. Faltering on the next step she was overcome with fear. She needed her mum that was the plain truth of it, yes she loved her dad very much also, but right now she just wanted her mum. She wanted her mother to take her in her lavender scented arms and never let her go.

Hermione knew she was at her breaking point; she had suppressed everything during the war, because it was the only way to stay focused on the task set for Harry. And now, if she thought too deeply about the locket horcrux, Malfoy Manor, Bellatrix Lestrange, Antonin Dolohov, Fenrir Greyback or the battle she knew she would never be able to keep going. After going through all the funerals for their friends and their family she'd felt that her distress level was only the tip of the iceberg. She knew this was the main reason Ron could not come, because no one could ever see her break.

Her mum was her balm the one person who could soothe all her fears and memories. The year after she was petrified her mum was the only one who could stop the nightmares of that great big yellow eye that she could not forget. Again after third year, when she went back in time so many times, no one told you about the disembodied feeling you suffered; like you're not really part of the world or your own life anymore, her mother was her anchor then too.

Also in her fourth year when Cedric died; she had never seen death before and that frightened her the most because he was just gone and never coming back. She knew that was the last time her mother could ever comfort her. She could not tell her anymore of her problems after that, with Voldemort returned things were too dangerous.

As she learned of the prophecy the next year she was already distancing herself because she knew eventually, what it would have to come to. And here she was in the end attempting to get her anchor back.

Hermione stopped walking completely and sat on the step, she felt everything crashing around her.

Do I even deserve to have them back? What kind of person am I that would violate someone so privately? I wiped out their child, for Merlin's sake, I wiped out me! How can I possibly expect that they will want me back? Hermione put her face in her hands and took a deep shuddering breath. She felt so beaten and worn like she couldn't go on anymore, she just wanted to disappear and never see anyone or anything again.

'Hermione?'

Please let me know what you think this has been sitting on my computer for awhile and would be interesting to see if I should invest back into it.