Authors note - I've been reading twilight fan fictions for a long time and finally decided to write one of my own. I don't want to give anything away, but I will say this story is little out of character. Hopefully you all enjoy! Reviews are much appreciated.

And one more little note, I don't have a schedule for posting. Life is pretty busy but the goal right now is to post one chapter a week at minimum.

Also, my husband is nice enough to proof read for me and edit a bit but I'm sure there will still be some mistakes here and there. Please excuse that, but feel free to point them out and I will fix it!

All characters and noticeable settings belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Bella's POV

It's funny looking back on my life. Of course, I've always thought back on certain things. Memories of relationships, friendships, jobs and everything in between. Now, sitting on my squeaky porch swing, sipping on a cold beer; I was really thinking back on my life. At almost 30; my life is no where near over. What have I done? I skated through school with good grades and a small group of friends. I've had a random boyfriend here and there. I have a good relationship with my family, moved out of Forks, and went to Florida for college. I skated through college with good grades, a small groups of friends, and a few relationships. I got a good job as an English teacher back in Forks. This is where I've been working the last couple of years. I saved up for a down payment to buy a house. I've accomplished a lot in my life. Some big and some small things. Some don't matter, while some changed my life. I've tried to think about what it is exactly I want out of life. But, there's not a real answer. I'm not sure what it is that I want anymore. For a long time the goal was finish school; Done. Then I wanted to buy a house; Done. Now what? What do I work towards now?

I sigh, sitting my beer down on the porch and lit a cigarette. Exhaling smoke, I watched a black car, followed by a moving truck drive down my street. My house sits on a small piece of land about 20 minutes out of town. Only one other house out this way and I was sure it wasn't for sale.

"Hmm," I sighed, then I put my cigarette out and stood up while letting out a long, loud whistle. "Bruno!" I yelled and got a deep bark in return. A few seconds passed and he came running to the porch.

"Hey boy," I smiled, petting his head. I found Bruno in my backyard almost a year ago. I'm guessing his mother was killed or ran off as he was just a small little pup, around 3 weeks old. I wasn't going to keep him at first. But, when the pound told me they would put him down; There was no way I was allowing that. Now a year later; I'm stuck with this annoying 120 pound wanna be lap dog.

I opened the front door, letting Bruno go through first; before entering myself and locking the doors. I set the alarm my dad demanded I have installed before heading to the bathroom. One of my favorite rooms in this small one story house. When I decided to buy a house I knew I wanted a fixer upper and while most the house still needs work the first thing I got done was remodeling the ensuite bathroom. The shower was walk in, with two shower heads and my absolute favorite part sat in the corner, taking up most the space. A large two person jacuzzi tub.

I turned on the shower, taking off my clothes while it heated up before stepping in. I let the hot water beat down on my back while my thoughts drifted. I wasn't sure why I was so lost in my head tonight. Maybe I haven't done a lot with my life, but, I had a great family. My mom can be a little weird. But, she is one of my best friends; even though she is in Florida. My dad is a little closed off, But, we are close enough that I wanted to move back here to be with him. I have a few friends, mostly people I keep in contact with from high school and coworkers. That counts? Right? A job I love, a brand new, well new to me, house and a dog. I should stop worrying. My life is good. I nodded to myself, confirming my thoughts. I'm not sure why. But, it just feels like something is missing...

I huffed, pushing the thoughts away and quickly washed myself before turning off the water. I just got my towel wrapped around my body when my door bell rang. The noise echoed in my quiet house, making me jump. Bruno jumped up from where he was lying on the floor by my feet, barking and running towards the door. Eyebrows bunched, I grabbed a robe before following after him. After disabling the alarm, I unlocked the door and swung it open.

"Are you kidding me?" I frowned. "What do you want?"

Jacob, my ex boyfriend, shrugged, "I tried calling like 10 times. You didn't answer. So, I came to check on you."

"I'm fine, thanks." I told him, going to close the door. He grabbed it.

"Not gonna invite me in after I came all this way?"

I backed up a step. But, I didn't let go of the door. "How's Leah?" I raised a eyebrow, watching his face fall just slightly.

Jacob and I have known each other since we were in diapers. Our dads spent a lot of time together. So, in turn we did too. When my mom left with me and moved, we lost contact but as soon as I moved back my junior year of high school, we became fast friends. My last year of high school, we became closer but never got into a relationship because we knew I would be leaving for college. While he would be staying back to finish his last year of high school. When I moved back to town again, we started messing around. More friends with benefits then anything. Then one day he just ditched me. I didn't hear from him for weeks before he finally came over and told me he met someone. Insert eye roll here. He may feel like he had found the one, his soulmate according to him. But, that doesn't stop him from coming to me to release some tension now and then. Every time he came over, I told myself next time I wouldn't let him in. I would turn him away and tell him to go back to his wife. But, I never did.

"She's fine. Are you going to let me in?"

I stepped back, allowing him inside the house. I really don't know why I allow this to happen. I'm not the kind of girl that lets a guy come use her, then go back home to his wife. Or at least I never thought I would be that type of girl.

Jacob smiled, stepping into the house. Bruno whined and immediately sat down, like always. I can barely get that dog to come for a treat. But, Jacob walks in and he is the perfect little dog.

"Go lay down." I told him, snapping my fingers. He looked at Jake and whined again. I rolled my eyes when Jake laughed. He patted Bruno's head a few times, told him to go lay down and off he went to his bed. I huffed, crossing my arms.

Jacob looked at me, smirking. "You look tense."

I swung around, walking to the kitchen for a glass of water. My other favorite room. Black cabinets with marble counter tops filled the room. The large breakfast bar and double stove made it my dream kitchen. "Maybe cause I am. What are you doing here?" I asked Jacob, not looking at him.

He followed me to the kitchen, leaning against the counter beside the sink where I was filling a glass. "I wanted to see you."

I sat the glass down a little harder then I meant to, sloshing water on my hand. "Why?"

Jacob moved behind me, grabbing the counter right by my hips, boxing me in. He leaned down, pushing my damp hair to one side. He planted a wet kiss on my neck.

"Cause I missed you, baby." He spoke into my skin, the heat of his breath making me shiver. I closed my eyes, leaning back against him. His hands circled my waist, pulling me closer. He ran his nose up my throat, taking a deep breath. "Haven't you missed me?"

I sighed, reaching back to grab a fist full of his shaggy black hair and nodded. His hands worked to undo my robe, pulled it open then undoing the towel I had wrapped around me and letting it fall to the floor. His hands, always so hot moved up my body stopping at my breast. I moaned low in my throat when his skilled fingers started rolling and twisting my nipples. I bit my lip, pushing my ass against him. His hands moved down slowly, I spread my legs when he got to my center. He cupped me firmly and I squirmed, pushing myself against his hand. His fingers moved into my folds, quickly finding my clit. I moaned, my knees getting weak. His fingers slipped down, one entering me quickly before pulling out and doing it again. I rutted against his hand, wanting more. He stopped suddenly, turned me around and picked me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist, holding onto his shoulders. "Let's go to bed." He whispered against my lips. I nodded.

I laid in bed watching him put his clothes back on. "Leaving so soon?" I asked.

He turned to look at me and sighed. "Yeah well, I don't want-"

I cut him off. "It's fine. I get it. See ya next time."

He sat on the bed. "You know I wish it wasn't like this."

I huffed, getting up. I grabbed a pair of shorts and a tank top to put on. "It's like this by your choice, Jacob."

He came towards me. I backed up until my back hit my dresser. He grabbed my chin, lightly kissing my lips. Then he scoffed. "Believe me, if it was a choice then things wouldn't be like this."

I stared at him for a moment. This isn't the first time he said something like that and each time it just confused me more. Yes, he is married. But, he got married by his own choice. If he truly wanted to; he could divorce Leah. Is that what I wanted? I know, I love Jacob. But, I wouldn't want him to leave Leah cause while I love him... I know it just wouldn't work between us. The sex is amazing. But, beyond that a relationship never worked out between us before and I doubt it would now.

I shrugged. "Okay. You should get going. Call next time, yeah?"

"I did call," he chuckled, then picked up my phone from its spot on the bed side table. "See, ten times just like I said."

I grabbed my phone. "Excessive much?"

He smirked. "I really wanted to see you. Answer the phone next time." He leaned down to kiss me, leaving his lips lingering for a moment before he pulled back with a sigh. "I miss you. I miss talking to you and hanging out. Could we go get dinner one day next week?"

I sighed. Since we started sleeping together, I just feel guilty hanging out with him and I really don't like being seen in public with him. Leah is a big girl, she obviously works out and could easily take me in a fight. I don't want to make it possible in any way for her to figure out what's been going on. I shook my head. "It's not a good idea."

"Bella-"

"No," I moved around him. "I can't hang out with you."

"You can fuck me? But, you can't hang out with me? How does that even make sense." He's mad or hurt. Maybe both. And, he was right. It doesn't make much sense. Either way, it's the way I wanted to do things.

"It doesn't have to make sense. I just don't want people to see us together. I don't wanna give anyone a chance go figure it out..." I explained.

He nodded. "Okay, I get it. I should go."

I nodded back. He gave me another quick kiss before heading to the door. I followed after him. I wanted a cigarette and I needed to lock the door again. Bruno followed us out of the house. We stood on the porch; watching Jacob get in his truck. He waved before pulling out of my driveway. I sighed, looking down at Bruno. "I'm such an idiot." He barked back in response, probably agreeing with me.

Something was touching my cheek. I keep pushing it off, but it kept coming back. I groaned, rolling over in bed. No school today, I was sleeping in. Bruno barked and I sighed.

"Five more minutes." I mumbled, patting his head. He whined. "Fine, fine."

I let him outside, going to the kitchen to turn on the coffee pot and filling his food and water bowls. Once I let him back in, I then went to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. After throwing on a pair of yoga pants and a T-shirt, I went back to the kitchen for coffee and sit down at my desk. I had some papers to grade and some planning for next week to do. That took up most my morning. By time I was done it was almost 12pm and the coffee pot was empty. I grabbed a water bottle and put my hair up.

"Wanna go for a run?" I asked Bruno. He barked, following me to the door. I set a easy pace, running almost lazily while Bruno ran ahead of me. It wasn't long before we came across the only other house around here and I glanced at it curiously. The car and moving truck I saw last night were parked out front, along with a big Jeep and a motorcycle. I could see no movement from inside the large house. I thought about stopping by to welcome them to the neighborhood, but then I thought better of it. My phone rang, making me stumble slightly while I tried to answer it.

"Hello?"

"Bella," Charlie's voice rang out. "Are you still coming over today?"

I glanced at the time. "Of course, Dad. I gotta shower and then I'll be over."

Every Saturday rain or shine, I go to Charlie's house for a cook out. Sometimes it's just us, and sometimes there are some guys from the station or La Push.

"Okay, good. Will you stop and grab some beers? I'm running low and the guys will be here."

"Sure." I chuckled and we said our goodbyes. I gave Bruno a whistle and started back towards home.

After a shower and some light make up, I locked up the house and jumped in my car. I made the short trip to the only store in Forks, grabbing some beer and headed towards my dad's. When I pulled up to the familiar house, my heart stopped then started beating double time. Jacob's truck was in the driveway. He could just be dropping off Billy. Or he could always be here for the cookout and that would mean Leah will probably be here too. I could feel my anxiety building and shook my head. This right here is why you don't fuck a married man. Especially, when you live in such a small town. I parked my car, getting out with the beer and walked into the house. It was cloudy as always. Although, thankfully not raining. So, I wasn't surprised that it was completely quiet in the house. I put the beer in the fridge, keeping one for myself and went out back. Dad and Billy were sitting by the grill, talking and laughing. My eyes roamed the yard looking and holding out hope that I wouldn't see Leah when my eyes landed on Jacob. Thankfully Leah was no where to be found. Jacob was sitting at the outside table, sipping a beer and messing with his phone.

"Bella!" Charlie grabbed me in a hug.

"Hey Dad." I hugged him back, nodding at Billy. "How're ya doing Billy?"

He gave me a cold look. I think he knows what goes on between me and Jacob. No idea why Jacob would've told him. I don't know why I've just always felt like he knew for some reason. "Good, good."

He didn't ask how I was in return, just turned his attention to the grill. Charlie went back over and I looked at Jacob who was looking at me. I rolled my eyes and went to sit beside him.

"Guess we are hanging out." I snorted, knowing this is exactly why he came here.

He smirked. "Guess so. You know I'm not lying when I say that I miss you. I really do."

I nodded, already knowing those words are true. I miss him too. "Where's Leah?"

He flinched, he almost always does when I say her name. It's like me saying it physically causes him pain. "At her parents house."

He didn't say more and I didn't ask more. Mostly cause I honestly didn't want to know. "How's work going?"

We fell into easy conversation, talking about work, life and friends. Jacob and I always had a easy relationship. Leah is the only thing that complicates it. When he told me he was in a relationship with her, I wasn't mad. I was happy for him. I knew even back then that our relationship was causal and wasn't going to end in marriage and kids. So, I was honest and truly happy for him. Then one night it just happened. We had a couple too many beers and we fucked. Since then it just hasn't stopped. I ask myself why all the time. It's not like I'm deeply in love with him and I don't think he truly loves me either. It just happens. There's really no excuse. I've asked him why he keeps coming to see me. He never gives me a real answer or avoids the question.

"Foods done!" Charlie said, setting down a tray of freshly grilled food. I stepped inside to grab plates, managing to balance four beers on top of them. Coming back out I heard the end of the guys conversation. Charlie was telling Billy to spread the word that there must be a bear close to town. Because, there are more then usual dead animals carcasses turning up. I handed out my haul, getting nods of thanks in return. I sat down, made my plate and listened to the conversation around me. I never really knew how to act around Jacob when others are present.

"How's work going, Bella?" Charlie asked

"Good." I told him cutting into my steak. "Busy. Midterms coming up. So, lots to get done before then."

Charlie nodded, then asked Jacob a question. I zoned out again and before I knew it dinner was over. We sat outside, sipping beer and chatting until the sunset. Billy and Charlie went inside while Jacob and I cleaned up quickly. We carried our dishes inside and I washed while he dried. We worked in comfortable silence, until Billy called to Jake that he was ready to go home. He quietly told me bye before leaving the kitchen. I stayed a couple more hours, picking up the house and chatting with Charlie before heading home.

When I got home I let Bruno out and grabbed a beer to sit on the porch like I did most nights. My phone dinged, letting me know I had a text.

Hey girl, I'm heading to Port Angeles tomorrow. Wanna ride wide me? -Ang

Angela and I have been friends since high school. She is really the only person that I'm truly friends with around here. I talk to other people. Angela just knows things I wouldn't trust with anyone else. Since, I didn't have anything else to do, I text her back that I would.

I spent all day Sunday with Angela. We shopped, we spent a few hours just hanging out at a small cafe drinking coffee and talking and grabbed dinner before heading back home. It wasn't until we were about 20 minutes from my house that she asked.

"Are you still seeing Jacob?" She glanced at me nervously. She didn't like or agree with what I was doing, just like a true friend though she would listen to me talk and support me with my decisions.

I struggled, staring out of the window. "He came over last Friday night and he was at Dad's yesterday."

"Bella!" She huffed, taking a deep breath. "You know you both deserve so much more then what you all are doing."

She's right of course. Leah too, she deserves more then what she is getting. I don't know her well, only saw her a few times in passing. She does seems nice enough though. "I'm going to end it, I am. I just don't know how or when."

"Block his number and don't answer the door." She said, giving the easy answer. "Maybe you just need to meet someone."

I scoffed. "I've tried. Relationships just never work for me."

It was true enough. Throughout high school I had a total of three relationships, all ending a couple months after they started. College was the same, just a few one night stands as well.

"You know, Ben's cousin just moved down here. He is staying with us for a couple weeks while he finds a place. I could -"

"No."

"Bella," she sighed again, glancing at me and the stubborn way I crossed my arms. "Okay. Just think about it. Okay?"

I nodded. "Sure, sure."

She mumbled something I didn't hear, I ignored it. We passed the house that was normally dark and empty, I looked out at it noting that every light in the large house was on.

"Someones living there?" Angela asked, surprised.

"Yeah, I guess. I didn't even know it was for sale." I shrugged.

"It wasn't, as far as I know it's been vacant for years." She said. "People have asked about that house about a hundred times since I started at Lunsford but every time we contacted the owner they'd refuse to sell."

I raised my eyebrows. "Hmm makes you wonder who they are…"

Angela nodded, pulling into my driveway and sighed. "Think about it, okay?" She reminded me.

I leaned over to hug her and told her bye before getting out and running inside. I still had an hour before the sun fully set. So, I threw on some yoga pants and with Bruno following went for a quick run, letting the pounding of my feet and heartbeat calm my racing thoughts. When I got home, I took a quick shower before making the coffee pot and going to lay in bed. Before I knew it, my eyes closed and I was out. What felt like five seconds later, I was groaning at my alarm, trying to smack it from my spot under the covers. "Nooo." I hate Monday's. Grumbling the whole time I got out of bed. I went to the bathroom to get ready. After a couple cups of coffee and sitting outside with Bruno, I gave him a quick kiss on the head and headed to work.

Forks elementary school was small, only 346 students. Teaching 3rd grade was not my dream job. Although, I enjoyed spending my days here and there wasn't many options in such a small town.

"Morning Bella." I glanced over at Mike, the gym teacher as I was walking into the teachers lounge.

I nodded in greeting as I poured more coffee into my cup. "Good weekend?" I asked.

He smiled. "Yeah. Jessica and I took the kids up to wild waves in Federal way for the weekend. It was really fun."

I went to high school with Jessica and Mike. They are the classic high school sweethearts. Went to college together, married a year after and popped out 2 kids.

"That's cool. Tell Jess I said hi." We weren't ever close. We did hang out with the same group of people. So, I guess we were friends. Mike nodded and left the room. I made a fresh pot of coffee before leaving myself and heading towards my class room. I opened the door and turned the lights on before opening all the blinds. The kids started coming in, saying hi to me before sitting in their seats. The warning bell sounded as the last couple of kids sat down and I stood up with a smile.

"How was everyone's weekend?" I asked, coming around to lean against my desk.

"Good." They all said at once.

"Good. Good." I nodded. "Get your notebooks out, I want to hear all about it."

They groaned and done as I told them. They knew the routine, every Monday they had to write a small story about their weekend. I sat back at my desk and leaned back watching them write.

The day moved slowly. Monday's always sucked. The kids had the left over energy from the weekend and it made them less likely to listen and more stubborn. When lunch finally came, I went to the lunch room with the kids realizing I'd have to eat crappy food cause I forgot to pack my lunch. I grabbed a salad and went to sit with the other teachers. I looked around the room as I ate and noticed a new face. The man was slim, but had defined muscles under his slightly baggy black T-shirt. His hair was a mix of golden blonde and light brown. Sharp nose and jaw line, with plump lips. It was his eyes though that kept me staring. They were brown but it looked artificial. Like if you got close enough you'd be able to see the true color underneath the muddy brown. His eyes suddenly locked with mine and I jumped, looking down at my salad.

"Bella's noticed the new teacher." Amanda smirked. I blushed, while she kept talking. "Jasper Whitlock. Him and his family moved here a few days ago."

Must be one of the people that moved in down the street. I knew we were in need of a new teacher, a sub had been teaching the 4th grade history class for the past two weeks. I hummed lightly. "That's nice."

Amanda snorted. "It is very nice."

I rolled my eyes as I watched him get a tray of food and sit down at a table with a few students. My eyebrows rose. Not many teachers sit with students. I watched him interact with them while I munched on my salad until his eyes flashed to mine again. I blushed and looked down, deciding to keep my eyes at my own table. After lunch the day sped up. When the final bell of the day rang I let out a sigh of relief and told the kids to have good day after quickly handing out homework. I lingered in my class room, cleaning up a bit and getting my stuff together. I juggled an arm full of papers and my bag as I locked up my classroom. Turning, I ran into a wall. The papers scattered around me and I realized that the wall was not a wall, but a man and not just any man, but Jasper Whitlock. My heart skipped a beat and I bent down to shuffle my papers together.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled, not looking at him.

He bent down as well, helping me get my papers together. When we stood up, he smiled and I think my heart stopped suddenly. I studied his eyes trying to pick out the real color but failed.

He held out his hand. "I'm Jasper, it's nice to meet ya." His voice was silky smooth, but had a the rough edge of a Texas accent.

"I know." I said, shuffling the papers in my arms, ignoring his hand.

"You know?"

I blushed. "Yes, I know that your Jasper. The new history teacher." Why did I just say that? Why didn't I introduce myself? My thoughts rushed. Dammit why am I such an awkward person!

I turned, blushing a deep red. "I gotta go. Bye!"

I quickly left the building ignoring him calling out "But I don't know your name!"

With a beer in hand I went outside to sit on the porch swing, dialing Angela's number. The blush was still sitting on my cheeks from my interaction with Jasper.

"Hey, what's up?" Angela answered after the second ring.

"I'm the biggest idiot in the world. Why can't I think straight when new people talk to me?" I groaned into the phone.

She laughed at me, by now she was more then use to hearing about my awkward encounters. "What happened?"

I went over the events of my meeting with Jasper, ignoring Angela's laughs along the way. "It's not funny." I groaned.

"It's pretty funny, Bella. It's really not a big deal though." I heard Angela talking but my focus was on the motorcycle going down my street. Or rather the blonde Texan on the motorcycle going down my street. I blushed again, for no obvious reason and realized I was right in my thinking earlier, Jasper did moved into the house.

"Bella?" Angela asked.

"Oh sorry. Guess who my new neighbor is?" I didn't give her time to answer before saying. "Jasper Whitlock."

I was still staring at him and strangely enough when I said his name his head turned toward me. My eyes got wide and I ducked behind nothing cause there was nothing there to hide behind. "Fuck." I said aloud and I could have swore I seen a smirk on his face when he turned back toward the road.

"What?" Angela asked and I once again remembered I was on the phone.

"He heard me." I whispered, still sitting on the swing ducking at a weird angle.

"Girl." Angela laughed. "You need some wine, there is no way he heard you."

Rationally I knew that but he looked right at me. I huffed, my nerves running high. I don't do well with new people. Especially when that new person is attractive. It's a wonder how I ever managed to be in a relationship or even make friends.

"Yeah." I agree easily with Angela. After a bit of chatting about our days, we got off the phone and I leaned back against the swing. He smirked at me. I know he did, but that's also completely impossible. I'm not horribly far from the road but between the rev of the motorcycle and the fact that I wasn't talking loud, it would be impossible. I shook my head and stood up. I whistled for Bruno and waited but he didn't come running as usual. I stepped off that porch and let out another loud whistle.

"Bruno!" I called, stepping toward the road. Charlie's words came back to me from the cookout the other day. "Damn it, Bruno! Come boy!" I would bring that dog back to life just to kill him again if he got killed by a bear. I started walking down the road, calling his name and whistling. I had walked about a mile when I heard him barking and growling. I stopped. If he was being attacked by a bear...

I mean I love the dog but I don't really wanna die. I listened, trying to figure out where the barks where coming from and started walking again. When Jaspers house came into view I realized that's where Bruno is and took off in a sprint. I found him by the side of the house. His hackles raised, barking loudly.

"Damn it Bruno!" I yelled. "What are you doing? Get over here!" He looked back at me, whined and came by my side. I looked up then and realized he wasn't just barking at the side of the house, but the man that was cowering against it. Fucking hell how many times am I going to run into this man today.

"I'm sorry." I apologized. "He is normally super friendly. I don't know what's wrong with him."

"No harm done." Jasper smiled. "I never got your name earlier."

That smile of his could put down an army. My mind raced, what did he just ask me? "My name!" I said loudly. "Oh Swan. I mean Isabella. Or rather Bella. Bella Swan." I'm pretty sure my face is on fire.

Jasper raised an eyebrow and chuckled. "Nice to meet you, Bella Swan."

"Yeah, you too Jasper Whitlock." Way to not sound like a moron. "I should go."

"You seem to be going a lot. Why not stay? You can meet my family."

Of course another married man. "I'm sure your wife is lovely but I should really be going."

I grabbed Bruno's collar, pulling him with me as I walked to the road. Jasper called out. "I'm not married!"

I stopped for a split second then kept walking like I didn't hear him. Some days, just now and then I hate my life.