I'm filling this puppy both for the April theme at rvbficwars ("Black to Blood Gulch") and for a request from my dear friend red-dye-number-five a while back in which Caboose got some time bonding/being taken care of by other members of Blue Team!
Red vs Blue and related properties © Rooste Teeth
story © RenaRoo
Daisies
When Tucker tells Caboose to check the grass for clues, Caboose forgets to both ask what constitutes a clue and just what they needed clues for. And if there's a relieved sigh from Church and Tucker as Caboose races out of the base to begin combing through the dry grass of the canyon, well, Caboose wouldn't know what it's for.
The sun is bright and beating down on them as much as it always does, but Caboose appreciates it for the day's task as it makes digging through all the terrain that much easier.
"Oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy," Caboose mutters endlessly as he crawls on hands and knees by Sheila.
"Good afternoon, Caboose," she greets him pleasantly, her motor sputtering as she moves her canon up and down to assess him.
Springing up to his feet almost immediately, Caboose grins at her. "Hello, Sheila! I am searching for clues!"
"Oh, that sounds very interesting, Caboose!" she says sweetly. "But what are we looking at clues for exactly?"
He blinks before shrugging back at her. "I dunno. It's just what Tucker says I should do. And I will do it! Church says you'll know what you're looking for when you see it. And I think that's exactly what I plan to do now!"
Sheila hums before nodding her canon. "Alright then! I wish you the best of luck, Caboose. Please let me know if I'll be of any service to you!"
"Sure thing, Sheila!" Caboose replies before dropping back to his hands and knees and searching the grass again. "Doo dee doo deet deet– Oh. Hello!"
Canon tilting curiously, Sheila follows Caboose. "What did you find?"
Caboose flattens himself onto the ground, gasping in joy and wonder as he looks at the sight before him. His feet kick out and it's all he can do to keep from bouncing in place.
"I have found the most beautiful thing. EVER!" Caboose announces. "I need to find Church! Oh, oh oh! Church is going to love this. I know he will. And he'll be so proud of me. He'll say good job, Caboose! You found the prettiest thing in the whole canyon! Just like I always wanted my best friend to do!"
Sheila hums again. "I am not so certain that that is how he will react–"
"It's gonna be great!" Caboose shouts as he jumps to his feet. He stops a few feet into his jog in order to turn around and look at Sheila. "Hey, uh, Sheila? can you… guard the area? Make sure no Reds take it first?"
"Of course, Caboose," Sheila responds.
"Oh, Sheila! You are just the best!" he preens before taking off for Blue Base.
Church and Tucker stand over it, guns drawn, heads cocked to the side.
They aren't bouncing for joy, but Caboose supposes he is doing that enough for all of them as he hangs back. Despite himself, he still edging closer and closer to where his friends stand.
"So… is it really…?" Tucker asks, looking up to Church for authentication.
"Yeah, actually, I think it is," Church replies with a shrug. "Weird. All this time we've been in the canyon and I don't think I've seen a single flower."
"Now there's a patch of daisies? How weird," Tucker points out just before he's almost knocked over by Caboose. "Ugh! Caboose!"
"Church! Church!" Caboose shouts nearly in the android's ear.
Church releases a long sigh and then looks to Caboose as calmly as he could manage. "What, Caboose?"
"Aren't they the pretties things you've ever seen?" Caboose nearly sings. "They're flowers! Really flowers! I love them. I will keep them happy and safe and home forever!"
"Woah woah, don't get ahead of yourself," Church warns. "Like, first off, you found flowers. Neat. Whatever. Second off, they're kinda wilty and not tall to begin with so no they're not the prettiest flowers I've ever seen. Third off, this canyon is nearly unsurvivable for weeds and cacti. You really think these flukes of nature are going to last much longer?"
Caboose stares back blankly before nodding. "Yes, I will make them last forever," he decides out loud.
Tucker crosses his arms and looks skeptically to Church. "I'm so not dealing with him when he starts crying over his frilly weeds dying of thirst in the canyon."
Church steps back and gives Tucker and incredulous look. "What? You think Iwill? No freaking way!"
"Tucker! Don't kill my flowers!" Caboose orders.
"I'm not going to!" Tucker groans. "I don't have to. Mother Nature's a righteous bitch. She'll kill them herself. Take it up with her that your daisies can't survive out here."
Caboose gasps and puts a hand on his chest. "My flowers can't live outside? Oh, no. We must take them into Blue Base! They have to live!"
With an aggravated sigh, Church crosses his arms. "Okay. What you're going to need, Caboose, is a glass of water to set them in so they don't dry out."
Brightening up, Caboose grins at Church. "Oh, thank you, Church! You are just the best!"
"Dude, don't let him fool you. Church is, like, the worst," Tucker interrupts. "I'm pretty sure he just wants to help you bring the flowers in so that he can use them as an offering to Tex."
"Daisies, Tucker? I'm going to give my ex daisies?" he asks critically.
"Hey, I never said you were smart in love," Tucker replies. "She dumped your ass for a reason, is all I'm saying. Plus it'd be worth it to see Tex eat you alive."
Caboose, only half listening, picks the flowers. He goes rigid at the conversation, eyes widening.
"Tex eats flowers?" he asks, shocked.
"Caboose, what did I tell you about interpreting our conversations instead of listening?" Church asks.
But it's too late, Caboose having scooped up the flowers, a good amount of the earth beneath them, and is already halfway back to Blue Base.
Caboose isn't sure how Tex found him. Not really. Though he does suppose that his clattering around in the kitchen as well as the trail of dirt probably gave some clues.
He's sitting on the floor with a multitude of their cups and pans sprawled out on the floor with him, all filled with water and dirt and the depressingly not firm flowers.
When Tex raises a brow, Caboose slumps. "Please don't eat my flowers."
"I only eat processed flowers," she says lightly as she steps over Caboose and goes for the fridge. "And my robot brain takes bear. That's about it, Caboose."
"Oh, that is such a relief," Caboose sighs. He even relaxes enough to put his back against the sink cabinets and watch Tex. "I should have known not to listen to Tucker. Stupid Tucker. Yeah, you're good Tex. You're a nice lady. When you want to be."
Tex smirks and pops open a beer. "That's the spirit, kid," she replies. She then turns and looks at the mess. "You know Church is going to make you clean all of this up later, right?"
"It will be worth it!" Caboose shouts. His hands wave around wildly to all the flowers. "Look at all the pretties I have! And since they can't live in the canyon, they will live in here! With me! And we will get a puppy! And a cow! And soon I will name a mouse Miss Tuffles!" He looks to the flowers and takes a happy breath. "All because of my daisies."
Standing her grounds, Tex seems to debate back and forth about whether or not to continue before she sighs and walks over. She squats next to Caboose.
"Look, Caboose," she says as gently as she can manage, "I really like your flowers… but I don't know if… Well, if they're going to like being inside too long."
Caboose's brows knit together and he turns his head cautiously to the side. "What do you mean, Tex?"
"I just mean that flowers – all flowers – are really picky about where they live. You're right, they can't live outside because it'll be too hot and they have a lot of competition. But inside they don't get a lot of nutrients and they don't have the sunlight like they need."
"But… Tex! What's great about flowers if they're pretty and then just die! Like a rude Church!" Caboose demands, glaring down at his new little friends.
It is Tex's turn to look confused. "Caboose… have you never seen flowers before?"
"Not growing," he says. "I'm from the moon."
"Oh," Tex replies, settling down on the ground beside him. "Well, for what it's worth, I always thought flowers were bogus anyway. Same reason."
Disappointed, Caboose slumps.
"But there is something flowers do get right," she announces, grabbing his attention. "They don't last forever, but if you give them to people you really like, it makes them feel just as pretty as you think the flowers look." She reaches forward and grabs a handful and begins twisting them together. "And theespecially good thing about daisies is that you can do this with them!"
"What is this?" Caboose asks just before Tex lays the twisted flowers onto his head. He gasps excitedly. "I have a flower crown! I am now like a flower princess!"
"Sure," Tex humors him before Caboose leaps to his feet. "Where are you going?"
"I feel so pretty! I know who else I want to be pretty, too!" Caboose calls out.
He begins to race out, only to skid to a halt by the door.
Turning around, Caboose scoops up a flower and then runs over to Tex, gently putting it behind her ear, then running back out again. "Thanks, Tex! You're not nearly as evil and scary as you look!"
Sheila's non-reaction to Caboose running up to her is a true testament to the familiarity Blue Team has with each other at that point. Her canon merely follows in that vaguely threatening-on-technicality way that it does.
"Hello, Caboose! How are you enjoying the daisies?" she asks genuinely curious.
"Oh, they are great, Sheila," Caboose says as he slows to a stop in front of her. "But they die if you leave them outside in the hot canyon. Also they die if you leave them inside in Blue Base without sunlight. Yup. Yeah-yeah, I think flowers are just really good at dying soon."
"Oh, that is most unfortunate," Sheila replies. "I am very sorry to hear that, Caboose."
"What? Oh that? Yeah! Me too," Caboose says, reaching up to his head and grabbing the ring of daisies Tex gave him. "But I learned flowers are cool one way!"
"And what way is that?" she asks.
"Because they're really pretty for a little while, you gotta use their pretty time to show people you really-really-really like how pretty they are back!" Caboose explains before gently laying the ring of flowers on Sheila's chassis. "So I'm letting you wear them, Sheila! 'Cuz you're one of the prettiest, nicest tank-ladies I have ever known. And now everyone knows it!"
"Oh, Caboose, that is so very sweet of you," Sheila cries out, sounding overjoyed. "Thank you, Caboose. You are a wonderful friend."
"Yeah, I know!" Caboose says, plopping down in the grass and looking around.
He blinks and then looks back to Sheila.
"Hey, Sheila?" Caboose calls out.
"Yes, Caboose?" Sheila asks.
"Is it just me, or is the whole canyon covered in daisies now?" he asks, looking around at the sea of white, green, and yellow.
"You are correct, Caboose! I was actually going to inform you of that," Sheila sighs. "I'm sorry if it makes your flower crown less special."
"Are you kidding? This is great!" Caboose yells, falling back into the flowers. "I'm going to make them for everybody! Church! And Tex! And the Reds! … Maybe Tucker. It's going to be great!"