A/N: Written for the Twelve Shots of Summer Challenge, specifically for the prompt 'Crime and Punishment.' Which, as we know, Light and L are all about.
Summary: L has known Kira's identity from the beginning, but he does not have the morals of a murderer.
This world is rotten. Those who are rotten deserve to die.
The moment L walks out of that tennis match, he is nearly certain.
Kira is childish and he hates losing... I am also childish and I hate to lose. That's how I know.
Light is a perfect match for Kira. The adamant righteousness, the struggle to keep it contained and concealed, the allergy to anything but outright victory, the carefully constructed veneer of normality. On the surface, Light is an ideal schoolboy with a shining smile and pure heart. He hides his sociopathic tendencies much too easily. In truth, he's a sociopathic murderer who thinks that he's the only one able to pass justice on the world, one heart attack at a time. Oh yes, it is all very Kira.
There's just one problem with all this. L has no evidence.
His detective skills have been well-honed, his intuition nearly always spot-on. After this much practice, the solution to a case stands out to him, and Light's presence sticks out sharply. He finds Light almost too perfect a suspect to actually be Kira. That L would come into contact with the murderer? Talk to him, observe him at close quarters, and have enough time to think to sufficiently convince himself of Light's guilt? It's incredibly improbable, and he mustn't allow himself to lower his guard.
Light smiles.
Just watch me, L.
Light is taunting him. All these murders, and L still cannot find enough evidence. Kira is ingenious, as brilliant as he knows Light is. L harbors no illusions that Light is his friend; in all probability, they are bitter enemies.
L almost finds it enthralling. The immediacy of the case brings him alive. No longer is he trapped behind a computer screen - no, he is here, real and present in all its terrifying implications, staring into the heart of the mystery, the eyes of the killer. He hasn't been embroiled in such a thoroughly engaging chase for some time, and certainly it is the first which holds his own life over the scissors of fate.
If he can just find something to clearly implicate Light as Kira, then he will have won.
And yet, he feels as if there are rules to this game that he does not yet know. Kira sits at the opposite end of the chessboard, shrouded in shadows, and somehow the pieces move in ways that should not be possible. For the first time, L is straining to keep up.
Despite the difficulties of this battlefield, L knows his own brilliance, and he trusts in his own logic. He doesn't do panic. He cannot lose, for justice rests on his shoulders.
It is a weighty burden he carries - the sooner he can win against Kira, the more lives he will have saved. And not only that - he will have proven that justice prevails over tyranny, that no diabolical killer can pretend to carry judgement over the world. If he must beat Kira at his own game, then so be it.
You're just a crazy murderer who has confused himself with a god...nothing more, nothing less.
It is nearing the end, and L knows he is losing.
Losing being a relative term, for he has known the killer's true identity from the beginning.
As his time draws to an end, L has thoroughly considered all options, even unthinkable ones. He has been tempted by the thought of a simple command: arranging for Light's mugging and murder by two thugs in a backstreet alley. Instantly, risk is cut down to minimal levels. Light would be found dead, and it would be considered a tragic accident. If Light is Kira, then he will have been eliminated. If Light is not Kira, the real killer will be lured into a false sense of complacency. After all, L is in command of Japan's police force, and he knows that his successor has ties to the mafia - such an accident would be only too easy.
But he won't stray to this path. He never will. For this is a game of wits and strategy, and L's work is only halfway done. Kira twirls the chessboard like his plaything and manipulates the pieces with ease, but he has options that L will never allow himself to touch.
Had he the morals of a murderer, he would have eliminated Light from the first week based on his gut instinct and a whopping 72% chance that Light was Kira. That percentage has steadily increased, and despite the importance of that figure, L also understands that this is not a matter of percentages.
Light is Kira, or he isn't.
Black or white. L wins, or he loses. Yet, the odds have been thrown too steeply against him. He has failed to prove beyond all doubt that Light is the culprit, nor has he found a more suitable suspect; therefore, he has lost. And sometimes, defeat must be accepted.
L is not, and will never be, like Kira.
I am justice.
Fin