Banica's Dream
The night had lasted long. Banica sat staring out her window, lights filled the sky. Her no where near full stomach growled as she hushed it. It was one of those nights. The ones that kept her up late, thinking long and hard on the outside world. I wonder if I'll ever find a chef that will never leave me, she asked herself, ignoring the truth of her gluttony. He'll smile as he carry's out a platter filled with the finest meat. Then He'll bow., and rest his hand on my shoulder as I dig in. But I fear- she sighed -one day He will be waiting for me on that feared platter.
As soon as she had knocked those cold thoughts out of her head, she snuck out of her sleeping chamber and slipped down the stairs. The Lord had barely, just barely, cracked open the door to the Servant's Room. There slept her faithful servants, Arte and Pollo. Banica walked in, showing little fret of waking them, and stood at their bedside. Here lay two... two... two children who have been so courageous and naive to stay by my side all this time. She turned to a mirror hanging on the wall, and peered into her own eyes. She was only looking for the innocence she once had.
How amusing. The fact that the moon even shines so brightly over delinquents suck as ourselves. A cannibal, two servants who are oblivious to the gore, and a chef who fears everyday to be his last. What a strange paradox is occuring.
Banica stepped away from the two, stroking their covers. By the time the children began to stir, she was already gone.
Before she came to reality, she had already been glancing on the hole she once used to spy on her chef's in the night. He was laying there so peacefully. One wouldn't have believed he was even real. That's when Banica caught herself. I vowed to never do such a sin as to spy or lust for a man ever again. And she hadn't. This had been the first in months, but she was lonely.
She still glanced back in, a tear sliding down her cheek. If I lived in the real world, I would be married by now. I would have a husband to sooth my pain, and possibly children to ruffle my feathers. All I ever asked for was to live normally. To be able to walk down the streets and be surrounded by children and friends and admirers. But my blood ties me to nobility and stature and hiding... and strangely... a never ending hunger.
Banica turned away, wiping away the tear. She began to stride for the kitchen. Very little did she ever set foot in such a place, but she would despise calling for assistance at such a late hour. She soon found herself searching for her prized possesions, and soon found them. A crystal glass and a bottle of wine. She poured the dreaded, thick wine into the glass, and gulped it down maliciously. The taste of iron stained her tongue. Never had she ever felt such little comfort in her drink. She shut her eyes tightly, and tears began to freely flow. Enough is enough, she thought. It's only best to sleep.
That is when she reversed her journey back into her sleeping chambers. She threw herself into her bed and covered herself with ill manner. Banica had almost immediately fallen asleep.
It wasn't something I was used to. I felt... so different. My hair as soft and smooth as the dress I was wearing. It was not the dress of a Lord or that of any high rank in nobility. Possibly of the daughter of a merchant, or another character I was ignorant of. I felt almost free of burden.
That is... before I saw him. A man. He was quite attractive. He wore that which must have been a highly priced suit. I hadn't seen such a nicely dressed man in years. If I looked hard enough at his face and mannerism, he resembled that of my chef.
And if I looked beside him, there was Arte. She... she... she was gorgeous! She was wearing the most grand gown I'd ever seen. Like that of a queen. Her hair was pulled up into tendrils of perfection. Arte's eyes were warm and welcoming.
But... then there was Pollo. He was wearing stray pieces of fabric which looked like he had been living in the dirt. Though his skin and hair seemed to be fresh and new, he looked like he had been isolated and sheltered in for decades.
And the three just stood there, looking like the strange bunch they were. A queen, a man of the law, and an irregularly happy soul. They were surrounded by many black-faced people. The people I had never met.
And I just stood there, looking around. Wondering where the hell I was.
And we all just stood there, looking happy and grand, like we were where we were supposed to be.
Then I had noticed another group of people. I believe it was eight others. Four women, two men, a boy, and a person with an indistinct sex. They seemed dark and fearful, though they put on the facade of happiness. One girl looked into nothing, lost and confused. She had been a few steps away from the others, facing another direction entirely and had a hand hidden behind her back..
I turned away to see if anyone else had seen them, but they all seemed to me oblivious of the group. When I turned back, she pulled out her arm, her fingers wrapped around a small gun. Tears began to run down her face. I failed to believe it, but everything else in that moment was muted. I could just hear a faint "sorry." Then she shot the gun and they all dissapeared.
No. Not just the awkward eight, but all of them. They all dissapeared. When I looked around, I wasn't in that town anymore. I was walking down a dirt path through a field of sunflowers.
I breathed in. Fresh air. Nothing was holding me back. I picked up the skirt of my dress and began to run. Run freely and laugh. The warm sun felt so nice. My fantasy continued forever until I heard a distant rumbling noise.
I slowed down so I could watch the edge of the road. There... there... was a horse...? And on the horse was girl who looked just like I did. The same silky dress, the same short hair, the same thin stature.
When she drew near, I was calmly walking. I smiled at her as she began to approach. She smiled back. She smiled maniacally. She began to speed up on her horse and held out a club. It was when she passed me by that I realized two things.
She swung the club up at my face. And... and... and... I watched my head fly of my lifeless body which had fallen to the ground. There was a clear detachment at the neck, splattered in blood. Just like the blood I once drank from a crystal glass.
This woman... this woman... That is the moment that I realized... that woman... is my grandmother.
Banica swiftly opened her eyes. It was over. A terrifying dream where her own family, her own blood decapitated her with lack of reason. Well. I can see a reason. She threw her legs over the side of the bed and sat up. Opening the door to her sleeping chamber, she found one Arte.
"Hello, milady. Did you sleep well?" Arte asked with wide eyes.
Banica sighed. "No, Arte. I definitely did not."
"Well... milady can make this a good day?"
"I suppose..."
Arte then began to undress her master. Then she replaced the missing night clothes with a beautiful red gown. She wrapped a corset around Banica's waist, and began speaking as she started tying it.
"Did milady dream?"
Banica stiffly nodded.
Arte looked into the eyes of the Lord. "Was it a good dream?" Cold, cold eyes.
"No," she blinked furiously. "It was not."
"What was mila-"
"I just don't understand!" she flung her arms. "Why couldn't I have been born free!? With all these problems cause by an idiotic bloodline, who am I? Honestly, who-am-I? I don't know, Arte. Arte, I don't know."
"Your a kind Lord, Master, Woman, Mother, and Friend. And your-"
Banica continued to interupt her servant. "No, I am not. I am nothing but a glutton. A glutton and a cannibal."
The servant sat Banica down with her on the bed. "You are more than the boundless food you eat. You-have-a-pers-on-al-i-ty."
Banica layed her head on Arte's shoulder. "I just... I just... I love..."
She was quickly hushed. "It's okay, milady. It's okay."
The woman quickly shot up to her feet, and held her arm out. "Let us go down to the others."
There were not that many others...
The two linked arms and waltzed down the staircase. When they arrived to the dining area, Pollo and the chef were waiting.
"The morning course has been prepared," chef said grandly.
"I'm not hungry," Banica smirked, and turned away. "I'm going out to the garden."
And she walked out the door.
Just Arte, Pollo-
When Pollo went to accompany her, the chef stopped him.
-and Joseph-
"Let her be. It would be shame if she were to eat you out in the courtyard," he smirked, knowing the lack of possibilities.
-but they're all I need-
"What a beautiful day today is. Look at the warm sun brightening the colourful garden, and filling the estate with clean, yellow light. And what fresh air it has brought us. What a paradox today is. How can you shine on such shameful people?"
-to be happy.