Written by Ellie!
Set in Italian Ice, about chapter 1 or so.
Walking through the hallowed halls of the Volturi gave me the chance to meet many different vampires, many of the Guard, but some were strangers. However, one of my personal favourite vampires was Demetri.
Demetri had sex-hair. And I mean really, really good sex hair. So much so, that one night, when he was on watch, I left my room and went to find him. When I did, I launched myself upon his head.
I ran my fingers through the locks of hair. Demetri was looking slightly unnerved now, and said anxiously: "Bella, why the FUCK are you touching my hair up in a sexual fashion?"
"I don't know," I replied in my most sensual voice, "it's so sexy, though..."
I'm pretty sure Demetri rolled his red eyes. "Bella, I know you and my Raving Fangurls™ want to sex up my hair, but my hair isn't interested in a sexual relationship. It's metaphorical heart was broken by Eddy-Baby's sex hair earlier this year."
I paused. "Eddy-Baby?"
"Um..." Demetri went sort of red, "well, perhaps?"
I blinked, then continued stroking the silky locks. With a push, Demetri yanked me off his back. Suddenly, I was falling, and before I knew it, I cracked my head on a wall.
When I woke up in the morning, I had a lock of sex hair in my fists.
I love it to this day.