A/N: Hello Minna~ well this is my first attempt in making an angst Hetalia fic. So please please excuse the unawesomeness. Ohh and if you happen to like it, or even feel anything about the fic please review. Thanks Minna!
Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia; if I did…it won't be as awesome as it is now.
Let's Play Pretend
Hong Kong glared at the two older nations sitting before him. His brothers; China and Japan. The two was sitting there, having a nice chat, and clearly enjoying them selves. While somewhere inside the hotel, his younger brother was slowly dying each passing moment. It wasn't fair, and it will never fair, not in any way at all.
It has always been know that Im Yong Soo, also known as South Korea has a very special liking to the eldest of all the Asian brothers. It was a clearly know fact. No one can deny that. It was just like air, just being there. Also, everyone accepted that fact. It was even weirder to see the younger nation not flawing over his older brother and keeping his hands to himself, or doing something productive to pass the time by.
Even before they lived their separate lives as nations, the southern part of Korea has been the one to show much affection and care for their Yao-hyung. He had always claimed to love the ancient nation the most. And true to his words, he really did. Hong Kong knew all of this. How could he not? He was there after all, he was always there. It's just that unlike Taiwan and Japan, he had always just observed rather than being part of the scene.
When the war started, Japan went berserk. No one was anyone to him anymore. Japan wanted power, he wanted land, and he wanted everything. But in reality, Kiku actually didn't want anything, he wanted nothing at all. He and Taiwan fought for themselves. It was survival of the fittest during the wars. Either you fight or die. And that's what everyone just does. They fight and fight and fight, for them selves, and for their people.
But South Korea was different. When Japan captured him, he didn't use his people as inspiration to live. His hope and strength during the war was China. The only strand of reality that was left with him during those times was the hope to see the older nation after everything. Whenever that will happen. He always claimed that his heart was in China, and it always stayed there, always.
When the war ended, they forgave Japan. Of course they did. Why wouldn't they? He was family right? Korea never forgave him.
Hong Kong briefly remembers the Korean's confession about that matter. Of course at first they all hated the Japanese man. The damage he's done was not something to forget that easily. But negative emotions such as hatred cools down after some time. No matter how much one denies it.
Like the others, Korea has already forgiven Japan for his treatment to his people, to himself. But what he can't forget about is how the Japanese man hurt China. How he slashed the elder's back, and how he dared to do anything to China. It was just that, simply that. Hong Kong knew of this, and he hated that fact. He hated it so much.
At this point, Hong Kong decided to give in to his conscience. He stood up and left the two older nations without a word. They didn't need to know what was happening anyway. If they did, they'll just mess things up, for the worse. What could they possibly do to make things better, anyway?
Hong Kong walks in the hallway that leads him to where his brother is he feels a sudden wave of grief pass through him. Does he really have to do this? Said thought disappeared as quickly as it appeared. It was Yong Soo we're talking about here. He needed to do this, at least for the younger's sake.
When he reached the door, he touched the knob lightly and closed his eyes. He didn't need to knock anymore, he knew it was open. He knew Yong Soo, he knew the younger nation all too well. Too well for his own good. He just wished the younger knew that. But that's a stupid wish again. He always had stupid wishes. They're all stupid because they're all impossible. But what's the point of wishing if it can and will happen anyway? Then that's not a wish anymore, right?
He slowly twisted the door knob and opened the door. There revealed an unmade bed, an empty room and an open balcony door. He wouldn't…. Would he? Hong Kong dashed outside the room, with hopes of seeing his brother safe and sound.
To his relief, the younger was just leaning on the metal rails that prevented him from falling and staring to the far of nowhere. It was definitely better than what he thought just a minute ago. He allowed himself to feel a few bits of freedom as he walked closer to the taller boy. He kept walking, with the intention of getting closer to the other, and when he finally stopped, he was beside the supposedly happy nation, just supposedly.
Both nations fell quiet for a while, both for two different reasons, unbeknown to each other. When a soft gust of wind passed gently through them the younger of the two broke the comforting silence that engulfed them.
"Xian hyung…" the southern part of Korea said as he tore his gaze from the nowhere he was so engrossed on earlier and focused his gaze at the familiar figure that stood beside him. The other who wasn't completely sure what he should say just gave him a quiet sound that signaled the younger to continue. The other hesitated to continue but was determined to fill his…whatever there is to be filled. So he swallowed the worries he held, just for the lime being. "Why do you think…no…do you think…does Japan really love hyung?" he said tiredly, with a sad expression in his eyes.
"I don't know…" Hong Kong answered, the words lacked emotion. He knows that Japan and China's relationship is real, something that wouldn't break anytime soon. He didn't care about that though, so it was better to answer just that. The answer was okay, it wouldn't hurt Yong Soo, and it was too safe to hurt. He liked that answer, but it didn't seem to content the other. He looked at Sooth Korea's sad expression and he added, "...but if he doesn't, then you'll safe China-hyung, right?" The other just frowned at the statement.
"I think I don't want to anymore…I don't want to." Yong Soo said as he stood tall and stretched his back, he looked straight ahead of him, focusing back to the nothingness. Hong Kong's insides twisted and jumped. Should he be happy or sad? He looked down to his feet and suppressed his emotions. South Korea, for the second time this day tore his gaze from the nothingness and looked down on the older nation. He mused; he was taller than him now. He never noticed that. When did that happen? He felt nostalgia kick in and his statement just now felt wrong. He took a step closer to the other and slowly leaned his head to the other's shoulder. He needed to arch his back to level with the older nation, it looked foolish, but he didn't care.
"I tried doing just that, but we both know it doesn't have an effect." 'We knew that from the start, all of us.' "Do you know what he said to me yesterday?" 'Of course, I was there. You didn't notice me though, China was there. Am I supposed to be offended?' Hong Kong bit his lips and decided to keep the conversation running. "What?" He felt Yong Soo breathe heavily in his shoulder.
"He told me that I didn't know anything…" There was a silent sob. "…that I had no right to question their relationship." the younger finished. Hong Kong winced. He knew how hurt the other felt; his face yesterday sold all his emotions off. He was sure the words sliced the younger's heart into pieces. Like Kiku's katana sliced people, nations, Yao.
"So you're going to give up now?" Hypocrite. He was a hypocrite. He wants nothing but to make Yong Soo stop fawning over Yao, but here he is asking him a question with an unspoken answer, no. Hong Kong felt the weight in his shoulder lighten; Yong Soo raised his head and intertwined his fingers with Xian. It wasn't forced, nor was it just a brush, Hong Kong cooperated of course. He let the younger boy lead him inside the room, with the sad face that greeted him in what seemed the distance past just minutes ago.
Yong Soo stopped walking when they were at the foot of the bed. He let go of Xian's hand and suppressed a sob, but it was still heard. He faced Hong Kong and the other just stared back at him, with shock written on his face. South Korea was shaking and sobbing at that moment. "Xian-hyung…I think…no…I'm giving up." Xian was about to reply, but he just closed his eyes and mind. "It's okay…" he said with the most gentle tone he could muster, with that Yong Soo promptly broke down.
There were; shaking, sobbing, angry murmurs of misadventures with China-hyung, curses directed to Japan and different sufferings he experienced. Hong Kong had to watch it all, it pained him but he needed to comfort the younger nation. To know that after all of this, it would be okay, for Yong Soo at least. After the tiring outburst the taller fell asleep, he was unfair Xian mused. How can he say everything to him then leave him alone here to feel the after math of everything? Yong Soo was unfair. Live was unfair.
He looked at the sleeping figure beside him, curled up in an adorable ball, still with tear stains in his face. He looked so peaceful. Hong Kong ran his fingers through his hair in frustration and closed his eyes. He hated China right now; he was so envious of the older nation. How dare he hurt Yong Soo? How dare he make Yong Soo so vulnerable? How dare he make Yong Soo fall in love with him? He stifled a slight giggle. Was he crazy? Maybe, but he wasn't that insane. He knew better than to blame the older nation. He just couldn't accept the fact that there was no one to blame in Yong Soo's situation and in his.
He looked back at the sleeping figure. At least he admitted defeat, unlike himself who couldn't do such a thing. Not that he's trying either. He was just like Yong Soo, fascinated, in love, with someone who didn't spare them a second glance, a second thought. The difference was that unlike Yong Soo, he didn't have enough courage to profess his love. He wasn't too sure either. Was it courage he lacked? Or did he actually have a motive to everything he did until now?
During Yong Soo's break down, he did nothing but comfort the younger nation. But unlike his demeanor, he also wanted to cry in front of him, to tell him how he felt, but of course he couldn't. Someone had to be strong for Yong Soo, and Yao wasn't going to be that someone anytime soon.
He continued to close his eyes in thought. So Yong Soo gave up already. Does this mean he won? He opened his eyes. No he hasn't won, yet. He changed his expression, on of pure happiness. He wasn't going to give up. He will win…eventually. He wasn't in a rush, he'll work hard to win Yong Soo and when he does, he'll stop being such an emotionless person. When that happens he knows he already won.
He reached out and slowly caressed the sleeping figure's face. He lay next to the other and intertwined his fingers with Yong Soo's, he inched closer the other's face and gave the sleeping face a sweet smile that made him look so beautiful. Too bad the other never noticed. He buried his face on the soft white sheets of the bed and promptly decided to sleep.
He quite liked this arrangement right now. He can pretend that he finally won. He can pretend that he was sleeping in Yong Soo's room because he was his, not because he was nursing a broken heart. He wanted to pretend that they were happy together, just like in his dreams. Yes, that's nice, it's very nice. He'll play pretend, that it's not really pretended, but the truth. Because just like in his dreams, it was the truth, and he never needed to play pretend. Because in all honesty as time goes by, playing pretend becomes tiresome, and it really hurt, even if you pretended that it didn't.
A/N: Yay! Ahh I fiished it at last~ Well this actually has a written chapter two but that would just be a sequel or something cause I'll be sticking to oneshots for now~ So….tell me what you think and all arigatou! Please be nice ^^''