I come home throwing my purse and my binder onto of the coffee table, and then slumping onto the couch. Once again I had a job interview, and once again I didn't get it because I was inexperience. I let out a sigh of defeat. I went to college for four years, but those years were for nothing if I not using my degree, in English with an emphasis on writing, for something.

"Maya are you here?" I shout from my self-pity from the couch. I wait for an answer, but nothing. "Maya?" I yell one more time, and again nothing.

I pull myself from my despair and wobble my way down the hall to Maya's bedroom. I knock, but no one responds but I can hear rustling coming from inside the room.

"Maya?" I try one last time as I knock. I give her a second to respond, but when no one does and the movement continues I lets myself in.

I see Maya painting on the floor with loads of different color paints around her. Maya has earphones in, that's why she wasn't answering. I walk up behind Maya accidently startling her.

"Riles! You scared me," Maya says with her hand over her heart.

I giggle lightly, "I'm sorry."

"How was the interview?" she asks pulling the earphones out.

I shrug my shoulders, "I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I'm taking my portfolio of my writing, I took my mom's tips for interviews, but nothing. Maybe I'm not meant to be a writer."

Maya shakes her head, "You are. You just need to show some of your more personal writing," I start to shake my head, "You should, it's really good. That's what people look for."

I slowly lowers myself to the floor sitting with my back against Maya's bed, "I can't do that. It's not even exciting. My life is relatively boring if you haven't noticed." I sigh, "I just, I want to do what you do. You get to create art every day, something you love, and that's your job."

Maya smiles, "It was all because of you. If you hadn't had dragged me to the wine and painting class once you turned 21, I wouldn't have met Marcel who was impressed with my painting. Which was kind of sloppy since I had already drunk too much wine." We both start to laugh. "Seriously, Riles I owe this to you," Maya gesture to all the art around her room.

I shake my head, "Peaches, you would have been a big-time artist either way. You were just meant to become one sooner rather than later. When is your next art show by the way?"

Maya searches her brain for the date, "I think in a month."

"Can't wait."

"Neither can I," Maya smiles. "Anyways, what are your plans for tonight?"

"Devin wants to take me to this over the top extravagant restaurant for our five-year anniversary." A grin takes over Maya's face. "You know something that I don't know, don't you?"

"I'm not saying a word. My lips are sealed," she zips her lips and throws away the key.

"You really aren't going to tell me anything?" Maya shakes her head. "Well, okay then. What time is it anyways? He told me to be ready by seven, and I wanted to relax for a bit in a nice warm bubble bath."

Maya grabs her earphones and pulls on them until her phone appears from under the mess around her, "It's only five. You have time." I pull myself off the floor and make my way to the door. "Oh honey," I turn around to Maya, "there is an outfit for you already on your bed, and I'm going to come in and do your hair and make-up. So, you know what skip the bath, and take a shower instead."

I let out a deep sigh, "It's just dinner to celebrate mine and Devin's anniversary. Seriously it's not a big deal. I'd be happy with my favorite take out, and watching movies here or at his apartment."

She rolls her eyes, "Just go take a shower. I'll be in there once you're out."

I turn on the shower in the bathroom and step in. I let the water wash down me. I don't even want to get all dolled up, that isn't me. Rarely does that ever happen. If Devin really knew me, the way I thought he did, he would know that I would hate this type of thing.

I'm enjoying the warm water wash down my body when banging on the door ruins that. "I need you to get out now, it's 5:30. You weren't supposed to be in there that long," Maya says from the other side of the door.

"Just give me a minute," I say a little annoyed. The door gets pushed open and Maya pulls back the shower curtain. I instinctively cover myself. "Maya!"

"Oh honey, we've lived together since freshmen year of college. We've seen each other naked," she says reaching to turn off the water and then grabs a towel and chucks it at me. "Now, get out." I quickly wrap the towel around myself, towel dry my hair, and follow Maya to my bedroom. Once in my room, she pulls me and sits me down at my vanity.

She blow dries my hair and starts to wrap my hair around a wand to give me wavy curls. "Don't you think this is a little much," I say looking into the mirror at her. She shakes her head. "I could have let it dry natural saved time."

"Riles, I love you, but you need to stop. It's going to be a special night. This is five years with Devin, the love one of your life," she takes more hair and wraps it around the wand.

I shrug my shoulder, "Do you think I'm settling with him? I love him, don't get me wrong. I just I think my feelings are changing."

She unwraps my hair from the heated object and stares right at me through the mirror, "You and Devin have one of the realest loves I have seen. He's the one for you."

I don't say anything I just stare at her trying to take what she just said in. I want to believe that, I really do. I've spent the last five years with him and he is a great guy, but something is just missing. I've been feeling this for a while. It not just with him, something is missing in my life.

The rest of the time I don't say anything as she does my hair and make-up. Maya has always liked Devin and I together. That's probably because he's the first decent guy I dated. In high school, I went through my fair share of jerks and ended up heart broken. So, when I met Devin, the first nice guy to take interest in me, I instantly fell in love. He makes me laugh and makes me happy, but now I don't feel that spark anymore. The one thing about falling in love is you can fall out.

"Riles?" I shake my head and look at Maya who is standing in front of me. "Are you okay? Nervous about tonight?"

"Uh-huh," I mumble.

"Don't be. How does your make-up look?" I look in the mirror and the first thing I see are my eyes. She's given me a dramatic smokey eye, it's too much for me personally. My eyes drop down to my lips where she has applied an equally dramatic red lipstick. I don't recognize the person looking back at me.

"Don't you think it's a little much?" she shakes her head. "I do." I reach for the tissues to wipe some of this lipstick away, but she swats my hand away.

"You look amazing. Devin is going to love it." She looks at the clock hanging on my wall, "It's 6:30 already! You need to hurry and get dress. Wait here, your clothes are in my room."

I'm tempted to wipe my face clean. When I wear make-up, I always go for a natural look. Concealer to hide my dark circles, a little eyeliner a wing if I'm feeling a little more daring, mascara, and sometimes lip stain.

I'm staring at the tissue in my hand. "Stop it. You look great," Maya says walking back in. I look at her and see the dress in her hands. I immediately start shaking my head.

"No way!" I say standing up adjusting the towel around me. She nods her head shoving the dress at me along with undergarments.

"Go and put it on. He'll be here soon." I stare at the dress as I walk into my walk-in closet.

I turn on the light and close the door. I hold the dress to my frame as I look at myself in the mirror that's behind the door, and I can't help but shake my head.

I slip on the black thong and matching black u bra that Maya gave me, then I start to slide the dress down my body. Once I'm dressed, I turn back to the mirror. My eyes widen. It's a red lace sleeve dress with a plunging v-neckline. The dress stops a few inches above my knee. I feel way to expose.

I slowly walk out the closet and Maya is smiling looking at me. "You look absolutely breath taking!" she exclaims.

I start to shake my head, "This isn't me. Can I change into something that is less revealing?"

"No. Devin picked this just for you." Why would he think this is something I would want to wear? He's seen my wardrobe. "Here put these on," she hangs me a pair of black pumps.

I take them from her and let out a small laugh as I slide them on, "You know if I didn't know any better, I'd think he was proposing tonight." I look at Maya who is looking at me with a smile spread wide across her face. "He is?" She doesn't say anything; she just stares at me. I open my mouth to say something, but the doorbell rings.

"That's him," Maya moves to leave the room. "I'll get it." She turns to me, "You can't let him know that you know. He wants to surprise you, so please let him."

She leaves to answer the door and my heart starts racing. I can't decide if it's from excitement or if it's from panic. I stand up and start to pace my room trying to calm myself. Shouldn't I be excited right now and not freaking out? We always said that the question wouldn't be asked until we both had our careers set. He's on the right path for his, but I'm still struggling here.

"Riley," Maya yells from the living room.

"Coming," I try to shake he last of the nerves before walking out of the room.

Once at the restaurant, the hostess shows Devin and I to our table. As we walk, I can feel his hand around my waist. This use to feel so right, but I can't help how wrong it feels now. He pulls out my seat and then walks around to take his.

"Someone will be right with you," the hostess says and we both nod our head at her.

Devin gazes at me and smiles, "I can't get over how beautiful you look tonight, Riley. You just look wow. I knew that dress would look amazing on you, and Maya did amazing with your make-up."

"Thank you," I try to force a smile. This look that he likes, isn't me.

A waiter comes to asks for out drinks and Devin orders. He comes back with a bottle of red wine and serves us each a glass. He then takes our food order. Devin orders first and when it's my turn to order, Devin orders for me. I never mind it before, but this time it gets under my skin.

"Are you okay?" he asks once the waiter walks away.

I nod, "I'm fine," I say placing the glass against my lips. I take a small sip. I look at Devin, and he is staring at me smiling.

He talks about his day at the office with my mom. He is an intern at my mom's firm, so they have a close relationship. He has a good relationship with everyone in my family, everyone except Auggie.

Auggie just won't warm up to him. He isn't rude, but he won't go out of his way to go with Devin anywhere when he invites Auggie with him places. Maybe there is a reason why, I just never really seen it.

After he finishes talking about his slow day at the firm, I tell him about my short day at the high school where I'm a receptionist in the office. My dad managed to help me get a job when I was struggling to find one.

"Didn't you have a job interview at The Diamond Magazine?"

I nod, "Yeah," I say quietly.

"Awe, babe don't tell me you didn't get it," I shake my head. "They missed out. The next one I'm sure is yours. Weren't you thinking about writing a book anyways. Maybe you just focus on that for the time being?"

"I was, but nothing. I need to feel inspired to start, and I haven't felt that feeling yet."

He smiles, "Maybe after tonight you will." I nervously smile back.

The waiter comes and places a plate in front of me and then in front of Devin, and leaves. It smells delicious. I move to pick up my fork to pick at the vegetables, when he stops me.

"Riley, before we eat. I want to ask you something. We can celebrate more than our anniversary," I smile at him, I think I know where this is going and I can feel nerves building in me. "Will you move in with me?" he looks so nervous.

I let out the breath I was holding. Oh, thank god. "Devin, we talked about this already. Once we are engaged, then we can talk about moving in. I just I think it's a serious step."

He starts to laugh, and I can see how nervous he is, "Well, then that leads me to my next question." He reaches into his inside jacket pocket and pulls out a small black engagement box. I can feel my heart in my chest pounding against my rib cage.

He slowly gets up from his seat and gets on one knee in front of me. I can feel all eyes on me, and I can't help but wish that he had done this in a private place. All the attention is making me anxious.

He takes my left hand in his, "Riley Elizabeth Matthews, you are everything any guy could dream of having. You're funny, extremely intelligent, undeniably gorgeous, and much more. You had me when you first said hello at our freshmen orientation. I knew at that moment I had to have you. It took a little bit of convincing, but you finally agreed to be my girlfriend. That was the best day of my life, it'll be the second if you will agree to be my wife. So, Riley, will you marry me?" he has a smile plastered on his face.

I look around the restaurant and I can see all eyes on us with smiles on their faces, waiting for me to say yes.

I look back at him and open my mouth to speak, but no words come out. I give him a weak smile and I can see the bliss in his eyes slowly disappearing. I can feel tears start to form my eyes, but not because of happiness but because I know I'm about to hurt him.

"I-I need to go," I grab my black clutch bag from the table and rush out of there as fast as I can.

When I'm outside, I start to take deep breaths. I didn't want it to happen like that, but I couldn't tell him yes if I didn't feel it in my heart. I start to walk down the street trying to hail a cab, but I hear someone yell my name. I turn around to see to see Devin dressed up in a black suit with tears in his eyes hurrying towards me.

"I'm sorry, Devin. I didn't mean for it to happen like that."

He blinks and a tear falls. He quickly wipes it away, "Riley, I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I thought you wanted the same."

"I love you too. I always will. I wanted this Devin. I did, but I'm not too sure if I want it now. This all feels wrong," I gesture to us, to me what I'm wearing. "I mean look at me. The make-up isn't me. This is nothing I would ever feel comfortable wearing, but you thought it would be perfect for me. I feel like we've been out of sync. The restaurant proposal was not for me. I don't want to sound ungrateful because everything you've done for me I am so apperceptive of, but I need to feel it in my heart that this is right. I love you, Devin. I do, but right now I just really need time to think. Can I have time?" I didn't know tears were falling from my eyes until he reaches over and wipes them away with his thumbs.

"You can have as much time as you need," he hands me the small box and I shake my head. "Take it, please. I got it for you. I want you to hold onto until you decide." I hesitantly take the box from him. "Come, I'll take you home," he holds out his hand and I look at him. He drops it after realizing I wasn't reaching for it.

The whole ride to my apartment was quiet. We didn't say a single word to each other. I kept stealing glances at him, and I see that his eyes are glossed over with fresh tears. I never meant to hurt him, that was the last thing I wanted. I do love him, but it slowly started turning to a friendship love and I don't know if there if I can go back.

He stops in front of my apartment, and he takes off his seat belt.

"You don't need to walk me in," I say in a hush tone.

"I want to," his voice cracks.

I shake my head and tears fall from my eyes, "No." I look at him, "I hurt you, and I am so sorry for that," I brush my tears away. "I know if you walk me to the front door it's going to feel natural to kiss you, and I will more willingly do it now trying to comfort you since I'm the reason behind your pain." I look at him and his eyes are already glued on me. "I just I need time alone right now."

"Okay," he chokes out. "Goodnight, Riley."

"Goodnight, Devin," I unbuckle my seat belt and get out of the car. As soon as I close the door behind me, I turn around to give him one last look, but he is already driving away.

I walk inside looking for Maya, but she isn't here. Instead, I find a note taped to her bedroom door.

Honey,

Shawn had to go out of town for work. Mom wanted me to come stay the night with her, and I thought this would be perfect so you and Devin can have some time as a newly engaged couple.

Congratulations by the way! I need full details when I come home tomorrow around one. Should give you two all the alone time you need.

I'm happy for the two of you. See you tomorrow. Goodnight and I love you.

Peaches

I feel the tears start to well in my eyes. We should be here locked into each other's arms, but I can't force myself to feel something I don't feel. I open the box and staring at me is a beautiful diamond rind. It has a big diamond in the middle and two smaller ones on each side of it. I slide the sliver band diamond ring on my ring finger, and it's too small.

I pull it off and place it back in the box. It didn't feel right to have it on my finger, and it wasn't because it didn't fit. It's because I can feel it in my heart he isn't the one for me.

I saunter to my room and change into something much more comfortable. I place the box on my dresser and throw myself on my bed. I lay on my side staring at it until I fall asleep.

In the morning, I wake up early, five o'clock early. I rub my eyes and sit up in bed. The first thing I see is the small box staring at me, and again I feel horrible about last night. I start to think about everything.

I've always played it safe. I never broken rules, and maybe I started dating Devin because he was a safe choice. He is perfect for me on paper, and at one point he completely had me head over heels in love with him. I don't know what happened.

I think along the way as I got older, I started to play everything safe. Maybe that's why I haven't started to write a book. I don't have anything to draw an idea from. I've always dreamt of writing one, being a published novelist, but if I'm being honest I guess one of the main reasons I haven't been inspired to write is because I'm scared of failing.

Half an hour goes by and a crazy thought runs through my head. I immediately start moving throughout my room grabbing things and throwing them into duffle bags. I do this for about half an hour before I jump in the shower.

I get out towel dry my hair, put on a pair of black cuffed up jeans with an off white over size knitted sweater paired brown booties. I brush my hair out and do a braid. I sit at my vanity and do my usually make-up.

When I'm ready, I make a few phone calls. First to a cab company, next to the high school, and lastly to my grandparents. When I hang up the last call, I grab the bags that I packed and go out to meet the cab. I run back to snatch the black box from my dresser.

As I'm in the cab, I start to undo the braid in my hair. I only do that so my hair has some texture to it instead of falling flat down my back. I start to go over what I'm going to say in my head as we get closer to the destination.

The cab stops in front of the building that I have known my whole life. I pay the driver and grab my things from the truck. This has to work.

I walk into my parent's home, and I don't see anyone. I wonder if I'm here too early. I pull out my phone and see that it's after seven. They should be up by now because they have work and Auggie has school. I drop my bags on top of the couch and start to move in the direction of the bedrooms when my mom appears from the doorway.

"Riley! What are you doing here?" she asks surprised.

"I need to talk to dad, well the both of you. Is he up? I can go get him," I say inching closer to the stairs.

"He'll be right down. Are you going to tell us about last night? Let me see the ring," she smiles reaching for my hand. I hold up my left empty hand, and confusion washes over her face. "Where's the ring?"

"It's in my purse, but mom I can't marry him."

"You said no to Devin?" my dad's voice fills my ears and I nod my head. "Why?"

I let out a deep breath and look at both my parents, "He isn't the one for me. He is the perfect guy, just not for me." I can't tell what they are thinking based on their face expression. "I need a favor."

"What?" they ask in unisons.

"I need to borrow a car."

Both their eyes widen, "Why would you need a car, Riley?" my mom asks.

"I'm going on a road trip. I'm going to use Uncle Shawn's blog as a guide of where to go, and then maybe steer my own way. I need this."

"Hold on, you reject your boyfriend's proposal of five years and now you are saying you want to drive to god knows where," my mom says. "I have to face him every day. Do you know how awkward that is going to be?"

I sigh, "Mom, I can't force something I don't feel. I know he isn't the person for me. Maybe he was at one point, but I'm changing. I want adventure in my life. I want to explore. I have played it safe my whole life. The riskiest thing I've done was my major in college which I don't regret even though you think it's a mistake."

My mom starts to slowly shake her head, "What are you going to do about work?"

"I called this morning, made arrangements. I managed to get three weeks off. I'm using all my vacation days and a few sick. It isn't the smartest decision, but I need to do it. If I get back sooner, then I'll go back to work."

"Money?"

I look at my dad who hasn't said a word, "I have money saved up from my days working in college and my job now. I've always been a penny pincher." I clear my throat, "I called Grandpa Alan and Grandma Amy this morning. When I graduated college, did you know that they offered to pay for me to go to Paris. They said I needed to get out of my bubble, and see the world. I never took the trip not once even considering it, but this morning when I called," I start laughing, "Grandpa said it was nice that I finally stopped being a square. My grandpa called my dull. Let's be honest, I am." This makes my dad laugh.

"Dad," I put my full focus on him, "mom is obviously not on bored, but can I borrow your car?"

He starts laugh, "You want to borrow my dinosaur? The one I bought for Mr. Feeny?" I nod. He looks at my mom and then back at me and smiles. "It's yours. I can't promise that you won't run into any car trouble."

I laugh, "If I do, it'll add on to the road trip experience."

"When you get back, I'll tell you the story of your Uncle Eric's and I road trip," he moves to where they hang the keys and grabs them.

I look around the room to look for my mom, but she's disappeared probably to go get Auggie. My dad hands the keys to me. "Are you leaving right now?"

I nod, "That's the plan. Well, I need to make a stop but then I'm leaving."

"Where are you headed to first?"

I shrug my shoulders, "Right now, I just want to drive as far away as I can. So, I'll probably drive until I'm tired and need to rest."

"You'll finally get to meet the world," he smiles at me and I return it.

Auggie comes waltzing into the room.

"What did you do to mom? She seems a little agitated," he asks hugging me.

"I didn't do anything besides tell her I'm leaving for three weeks for a road trip."

"No way!" he exclaimed. "Can I come?"

"I wish Aug, but one you have school and two I need to do this alone."

I watch him as he moves around the kitchen grabbing a bowl, cereal and milk, and my dad follows suit.

"Should I wait for her to calm down before I leave?" I ask my dad. He just shrugs his shoulder as he puts a spoon full of frosted flakes in his mouth. "Great help," I tease.

"Mom," I shout from the kitchen.

"One minute," she shouts back.

I take a seat at the table with Auggie and my dad to wait for my mom to come out. I don't know what she is planning on telling me, but nothing is going to make me change my mind.

A few minutes go by before my mom walks back into the kitchen.

"Cory, Auggie hurry up we need to leave," she demands.

"Mom?" she looks at me. "I'm leaving." I pull away from the table and turn to get up.

"Wait," I look at her just as I do there is knock at the front door. "Can you get that?"

"Sure." I move to the front door. I pull the door back and get met with hazel eyes that I have stared into for the past five years. "Devin what are you doing here?"

"Your mom asked me to come. You're leaving town?" I nod. "You said you needed time. I didn't think you would up and leave."

"Devin why don't you come in," my mom says from behind me. I open the door wide open letting him walk in. "Cory, Auggie let's go now."

"I'm not done though," Auggie complains.

"I'll give you money to buy something at school," my mom says back. Auggie puts his bowl in the sink and makes his way to his room to grab his backpack. "I'll meet the two of you in my car, so hurry please." She walks to me embracing me into a hug, "Give him a chance," she whispers in my ear.

I shake my head, "Mom, I'll see you when I get back. I love you." I kiss her on her cheek. She pulls away and looks me straight in my eyes. I hope she can see that I'm really going. I know the only reason she called Devin was to have him try to convince me to stay, but it isn't going to happen. I watch as she walks to give Devin a quick hug and then walks out.

My dad gets up from the table and rinsing both his and Auggie's bowls and places them in the dish washer. He walks over to me pulling me slightly away from Devin, "Don't listen to your mom. She just worries. You call every day you are gone, okay?"

"Of couse, dad."

"Most importantly open your eyes. See everything you'll be surprised on things you see or even people you'll meet. I'm excited for you. I love you, pumpkin."

I can't help the smile and tears that well up in my eyes, "I love you too, dad." I wrap my arms around his neck and hold him tight. I slowly pull away, "Okay, go have fun out work." I laugh.

He moves to the front door grabbing his bag by the door on the way out. "Bubba, let's go," he shouts.

Auggie comes running into the room, "I'm coming," he looks at me. "Bring me back something cool."

We both laugh, "But of course."

"I guess I love you and I'll miss you," he says nonchalantly.

I ruffle his curly hair and pull him into a hug, "I'm going to miss you, and I love you too." Auggie pulls away and looks at Devin.

"You breaking up with him?" he whispers in my ear for only me to hear. I nod my head slowly. "Good. You never looked at him the way mom looked at dad or vice versa." My eyes widen, when did my fifteen-year-old brother start to realize this. He was only ten when Devin came into the picture. He was able to see what I never did. "I may be young, but I know love," he says as he starts to walk towards my dad who is waiting by the door.

"Bye Devin," my dad says as he walks out.

"Bye Mr. Matthews. Bye Auggie."

Auggie looks at him and looks back at me, "Bye Devin. Have fun Riley." I give him a small smile as he closes the door. Now it's just me and Devin.

He takes a step towards me and I step away. "Do you think you can convince me to stay here?" I wait for him to say something but he doesn't. "I'm not changing my mind. I have everything figured out. I need to do this."

He looks at me with sad eyes and I have to look away before guilt overwhelms me, "What about us, Riley?"

I take a deep breath and reach for the purse. I slowly pull out the box. I can see him shaking his head, "I can't take this. It's a beautiful ring, but I'm not the girl it's meant for." I see his eyes gloss over. "I'm sorry," my voice breaks. "I know you must hate me right now. I'd hate me too."

He steps in front of me grabbing my face between his hands, "Never. My heart will never hold hate for you," his hands drop, and I hand him the ring. He looks at it as a tear falls, "Maybe when you get back we can talk about this. Keep it with you until you get back."

"Devin," I sigh, "please don't wait for me. Just take the ring." I hold it out and he slowly takes it.

"You're worth the wait. I'd wait forever for you."

I start to shake my head as tears start to well in my eyes, "I should get going."

"I'll help you with your bags," he starts to grab them off the couch.

I try to refuse, but he doesn't take it as an answer. Once again there is silence between us as we walk down to the car. I can't have him waiting for me to change my mind because I'm going to feel obligated to do so. He doesn't deserve that and neither do I. When we get to the car, I take the bags from him placing them in the back seat.

"So this is it?" I nod. "How long are you going to be gone?" I shrug my shoulders. "Are you not going to talk to me?"

I take a deep breath, "Please let me go. Don't wait. Please." His eyes drop and so does my heart, "Devin, I love you. I always will, but sometimes the way you love someone changes. I know you believe I'm the one for you, but I don't feel it here," I put my hand over my chest.

"I love you. I can't lose you."

I shake my head. He has tears streaming down his face, as do I. "Bye, Devin." I give him a light goodbye kiss on his cheek before stepping into the driver's seat of the car.

I'm driving for half an hour before my phone starts ringing. I glance down and see Maya's face looking at me. I quickly answer it, and place it on my lap on speaker.

You are leaving on a road trip and didn't tell me! I had to hear it from your mom! She shouts from her end of the phone.

Maya calm down.

I will not calm down! You are leaving for I don't know how long, and on top of that you broke up with Devin! You were supposed to be engaged to him, not end everything! Are you leaving because he proposed?!

ENOUGH! I yell from my end. I need to do this Maya. Maybe Devin proposing was the thing that pushed me to do this, but I've been feeling like something has been missing in my life for some time. And I'm sorry, what I was supposed to do, what does that even mean? I did what felt right to me. For once, I did something for myself without thinking about how it is going to affect someone else. Yes, I feel absolutely terrible for hurting Devin. But I would have been miserable in the end, and so would have Devin. It was the best thing. I can feel irritation building inside me.

Maya sighs. Let me at least come with you, you shouldn't be alone right now. You aren't thinking like Riley. This isn't what you need.

I groan. You don't get it, do you? This is exactly what I need. You told me I need to share my personal writing, but how can I do that if I don't have anything to write about. I need to do this alone. For five years, it was Riley and Devin and before that it was Riley and Maya. I take a deep breath. I need to do this alone. If anything exciting happens, you'll be the first to know or you'll read about it because I plan on writing. I have my laptop and my journal that never leaves my side.

You really aren't going to let me come, are you?

Peaches, I already left.

She sighs in frustration. I can't believe you are doing this.

I needed it. I wish you and my mother would understand it. My dad did even my grandparents did. They practically pushed for it. I lived through the stories of your crazy adventures, it's time to create my own. Hey maybe if I miss you, I'll tell you were I'm at and you can fly out or something.

So, I should be expecting a call tomorrow. We both laugh. I love you, honey. Just please be safe. If you need anything, you tell me. Promise?

I smile. I promise. I love you, too, peaches. I'll see you when I get back. Bye.

Bye Riles.

I wait for her to hang up and toss my phone in the passenger seat. I take a deep breath and slowly let it out.

"Now, it's just me and the road. Let's see where it leads me," I say to myself as I drive ahead.