Alas, poor York, I randomly got inspiration last night for a new fic! It tackles the difficult question of 'what is humanity?' and the confusing emotions that rise from this question!
Without further italicized text, here we are.
Everything was white here.
The floors were white.
The walls were white.
The ceiling was white.
Their clothes were white.
But this was of little concern to Roxas. He was what they called a Nobody. A subject who didn't develop a personality. He wasn't alone in this curious fact, but the others were… different.
Roxas was twelve, and sitting before on a blank, white couch. The seat of the couch was stiff and it hurt Roxas' back, but he didn't complain. He barely spoke as it was. Why should he speak, when there's nothing to say? That's what always confused him about his keepers.
Well, that's what he called them.
Keepers.
The men and women in white lab coats and with white ties who watched him and the others from behind their two way mirrors. They didn't think he knew that the mirrors were actually means for them to watch them, but again, why tell them? They'd just find a new way to spy on him and he'd have to figure that new way out.
And that seemed like a bother.
A show about the Earth's slowing rotation played out before him. It was a documentary, one he had seen many times. The keepers said that it was a good sign that he enjoyed watching this documentary.
A good sign.
Like he was some sort of defective thing? But then again, they called him a Nobody. Something he learned quickly to dislike.
He had seen the other Nobodies when he was younger. They didn't think he had, but he saw them.
And he was nothing like them.
Nobodies had eerie, blank stares. They rarely did anything. Just stood around. They walked to the washroom when they had to relieve their bowels or bladder. They sat down or laid down when they were tired. Functional things that any halfwit computer could learn. But they couldn't learn anything past basic human functions.
They had no personality. No humanity. They were a nobody. Nobody.
And they called him that? But why? Roxas knew he was something. Descartes said "I think, therefore I am." – Well, to be fair, Descartes never said that, that was just something people liked saying, to sound smart. One of his keepers liked to use that line. The real line was different.
Anyways, Roxas knew he existed. He knew he thought. He was thinking right now. He was bored, after all. He twisted in his seated position, his back aching.
They watched on from the far wall, behind their mirror.
If Roxas listened closely, he could hear them. They were discussing whether to keep him or not. Because they were the keepers, and he was the kept. He wasn't developing socially, they say. He doesn't play with the other children, one of them had written on his file.
Why should he play? It was boring. The only interesting person here was Mother. And she was very busy.
Mother's real name was Namine. Namine adored Roxas and was the only reason why he had been kept around for so long. She had told the keepers that Roxas wasn't a Nobody. And they would disagree and try to tell her differently, but in the end, she had final say. Mother was Mother.
Nobody disagreed with Mother.
Roxas picked up the rounded remote, turning off the TV screen. He had learned from a particularly troublesome subject, Axel, why the remotes were rounded. Some subjects tried to escape, and pointed objects like remotes made excellent weapons for knocking the keepers out.
He looked over at the mirror on the far wall, staring into it. His hair was in a neat part, his blue eyes staring boredly back. Even if he couldn't see it, he knew he was making the keepers uncomfortable, and that would have to do.
For now, atleast.
Roxas broke his staring contest with the mirror, and got up, his back cracking from remaining seated for so long. He walked over soundlessly to the window. His clothing felt awkward and too big. They dressed him in a white sweatshirt and white pants. But they were too big. They were uncomfortable. But they were to wear clothes all the time.
When Roxas was younger, he had questioned Mother on the necessity of clothes. She explained that, outside the Heart Compound, the weather was a bit more intemperate, and sometimes it would get cold. She went on to tell him that he should get used to clothes, because she was sure someone would take him into their house and make him family.
Mother Namine always had a smile on as she told him of how one day he would be adopted. Roxas understood that people are the product of sex, and that everyone has parents. Mother told him that he had biological parents, but they were strangers who had sold sperm and egg for a fair bit of money to the Heart Coorperation. And when they made Roxas, she became his mother.
But it had been twelve years, and nobody had adopted Roxas. In six years, he would either be discarded, or sent into the general public. Roxas found this to be an exciting prospect, but worrying, too. Roxas didn't want to not exist, and so he proved his worth to Mother in other ways.
He may not talk a lot, but he was smart and studious. His IQ was off the charts, as Mother said so many times, and he was incredibly agile and fit for his age.
But all that wouldn't matter if the keepers got their way and disposed of Roxas. Roxas understood death, so why didn't they say they would kill him, instead? It didn't make sense. But, for someone like Roxas, who straddled the lines of brilliance and Nobody, genius and fool, nothing much made a terrific amount of sense.
Roxas was pretty sure that things would make more sense once he was older and could see the world with his own two eyes.
He was pretty sure of that, at least.
"Sora! It's room 414, it'll be on the left after the corner!" A newly familiar voice called to Sora.
"Thanks, Riku! I found it!" He called back to Riku, his residence advisor for his dormitory floor.
Sora attended the prestigious Hearts University, named after the founder of the massive company, Hearts Incorporated, Xemnas Hearts.
Sora held in his arms three dirty old boxes, and something was leaking through the old cardboard under his left hand. He fumbled with his new keys and unlocked the door, pushing it open with his elbow. The room before him was unimpressive, to say the least. A narrow, white hallway lead toward a larger space, where two beds, two desks, and two dressers sat, facing off identically. Like a giant chess set, consisting of three pieces.
Sora dropped the boxes near the door, and removed his boots. The room was dim, and he searched for a lightswitch. Finding one, two bright domes on the ceiling lit up, and showed off the blankness of the room in all its boring glory.
"Well. This sucks." Sora pouted to himself. He sighed, running a hand through his light blond hair. He missed his family and friends, and wouldn't get to see them for months. Regardless, he pressed forward, the short carpet crunching quietly under his feet as he silently reminded himself that he'd make plenty of friends.
The larger space of the room, where the furniture was, had one green wall, and a white wall opposite. Sora eyed both walls. Which one would he take? He didn't want to be that roommate and take the better side, so he chose the white wall side, and grabbed his boxes, laying them on the thin excuse of a mattress.
For such a highly regarded, world renowned university, it sure did have shitty accommodations for first years. But that was okay with Sora, he would make do. He opened the first of his boxes, haphazardly tearing the thing open like a kid on Christmas, and revealing his recently bought sheets, which he tossed out onto the bed into a messy ball.
Problems for a later time when he'd need his bed, right?
Procuring from the soggy box of wonders, Sora procured a lifesized key shaped blade. It was dull, obviously, but held sentimental value. Nicks and scratches marred the smooth surface, and the once golden hilt was dirtied with years of disuse. He smiled nostalgically at the old thing, and, using the already present hooks on the bleach-white wall, hung the thing up.
Sora continued to unpack his things, careful not to take up more than half the room with all his junk, before switching off the lights and leaving the room.
Sora made his way down the modern-looking hall to the glass door that lead to his floor's lounge. He pushed the heavy thing open, and was greeted with the sudden realization that the door was heavy for a good reason.
That was soundproof glass, and three other students were blasting music through a sound system, connected to the TV. One of them turned, his black hair spiked in random directions, much akin to Sora's. He looked to the other two students; one a tall blonde, the other a girl his height. "Guys! Shut that shit up!" He barked angrily.
Sora blinked, this kid seemed a little… aggressive. The girl paused the song, which Sora only now realized was everyone's love and foe, PSY's Gangam Style.
The black haired teen stepped forward. He was a little taller than Sora, and stuck a rather unpleasant person, his eyes narrowed as he observed Sora. Regardless of this, Sora offered a smile and a hand. "Hey, I'm Sora! Nice to meet you."
The black haired teen frowned for a moment. "Sora… that means something in Japanese, but I can't remember what. Whatever. I'm Vanitas, second year. By the looks of it, what with that smile and your general exuberance to be here, you're a first year." He remarked flatly.
The girl, a red haired pretty little thing, stepped forward. "Oh don't mind Vanny, he's just pissy because he missed One Direction's concert. I'm Kairi, and tall, blonde and handsome, otherwise known as Ventus, are happy to meet you, Sora!" Kairi smiled, shaking Sora's hand with an eerily firm grasp.
"Cool, and don't feel too bad, Vanny, I like One Direction too." Sora chuckled. Vanitas' black brows knitted together.
"I do not like them!" He said angrily. "And it's Vanitas, not Vanny."
"It is Vanny, and yes you do. I've seen your music playlist." Ventus retored wryly.
Sora laughed, causing another scowl, that he was quickly realizing was a trademark of Vanitas'. He felt like things wouldn't be so bad, now.
Sora learned from Riku when he arrived (with food, bless the man for remembering that the cafeteria didn't open until dinner tonight) that the their floor was largely late on arriving, and that only a handful of students were there. After a few hours, Riku had gathered all the students who would arrive today.
They sat on the modern looking couches as conversation waved back and forth between the various dorm-goers. Riku quieted them down quickly enough. "Alright everyone, there's one more person that will be arriving today. Has anyone seen a… Roxas? He should be in 414. That's your room, right, Sora?" Riku turned to Sora, a silver brow raised. Why was his hair silver? He must dye it. It looked cool, at least.
"Can't say I have, Riku. I haven't been back to my room in a while, but he wasn't there when I moved in." Sora shrugged, his roommate was late, how terribly scandalous.
Riku frowned, rubbing his chin as he picked up a hefty booklet and began wading through the page. "Roxas… Roxas…" he stopped on a page, his eyes widening. "Oh. I see." He said simply, after regaining his composure.
"… What do you see, Riku?" Vincent, another of the floor's enigmatic types asked, seemingly surprised as Riku's reaction.
"Says here that this Roxas is from the Hearts Compound. He's a subject." Riku said simply, all eyes being drawn to him, and conversations ceasing instantly. Sora blinked, was it such a big deal? Yeah, maybe this Roxas was a test tube baby, but so what? He was still human, after all.
"Well, so what?" Sora shrugged, smiling. "What's the big deal? So what if they grew him in a tube, he's still human, isn't he?" Kairi nodded in agreement, training her gaze back to Riku.
"Sora, he's never been adopted. You know what that means. He might… He might be off…" Riku explained.
Sora frowned, "It doesn't matter, I don't mind, really."
Riku nodded slowly. "Alright, if you're sure about this. But if you want to switch rooms with someone, come to me with them, and we can make it happen."
"Don't worry about it, Riku. I'm sure Roxas and I will get along great!" Sora nodded energetically.
Kairi laughed, "Oh Sora, you're just like a big kid!"
Sora smiled at her, "Maybe I am? Growing up and acting mature is so lame, y'know?"
A few hours later, Sora was back in his room, unpacking his clothes into the, predictably, modern looking dresser on his side of the room. Music played from his laptop, and he hummed along. From one of the boxes, he pulled out a white sweatshirt, with buttons that went down to the sternum. The brunette began to fold the seemingly unimpressive article of clothing when a knock at the door sounded. Sora blinked, and paused the song. Why didn't they just come in? If he was asleep or wanted privacy, he wouldn't have music playing. Probably.
He walked over to the door, opening it to find an eerily similar set of blue eyes staring back at him.
A young man, no older than Sora, stood before him. His bright blonde hair was parted on the side, and he wore a white shirt, with buttons that started from the sternum done up neatly, and a pair of beige pants. Sora blinked, the teen before him remaining quiet for a moment, before extending a hand, and saying in a very calm, controlled voice, "Hello, my name is Roxas. Nice to meet you." Somehow Sora doubted that Roxas thought it was nice to meet him.
Sora shook his hand quickly, "So you're Roxas? Cool! You're late, bud!" The brunette decided that since this guy had been cooped up in some creepy facility all his life, the least he deserved was someone in this university not staring at him like he was some kind of failed experiment.
Roxas blinked as Sora swung his arm around his shoulder, dragging him into the room. "I don't think I'm late… it's seven o'clock, isn't it? That's when I was supposed to arrive…" Roxas trailed off, seemingly lost in thought.
Sora chuckled, "Don't sweat it, man. Just unpack your stuff and we can go get something to eat!" Sora eyed Roxas closely. He seemed to pristine in his bland clothes. Like a treasured piece of history that had never been dirtied by human hands. Well, until Sora touched him. Suddenly conscious of the arm he had around Roxas' shoulders, he removed it, looking away awkwardly.
"Huh, green." Roxas commented, eyeing the wall that stood next to his bed. "Sora, right?" He turned, looking to Sora, his eyes inquisitive.
"Yeah, that's me!" Sora grinned, jabbing himself in the chest with his thumb. Roxas turned, regarding him for a moment. Sora suddenly felt uncomfortable under the gaze of this boy. He couldn't be more than eighteen or nineteen years old, but his eyes held this… unfathomable wisdom.
"This is my bed, then? It's good. Better than back at the Compound." Roxas nodded to Sora, and began unpacking his stuff. Sora watched in silent awe as Roxas methodically placed identical shirts to the one the blonde was already wearing, identical pants to the ones he was already wearing, and a few pairs of underwear and socks into the drawers.
"That's all you brought?" Sora blinked, taking a seat on Roxas' bed.
Roxas shrugged. "That's all they gave me. The keepers never did like me much." Roxas held his composure, but something in those eyes of his gave away something…
Was it pain? Sora couldn't say. "So, you're from the Hearts Compound, then?" Sora inquired, deciding to change the topic. Because talking about Roxas' unusual upbringing was definitely less awkward than who brought him up. Yep. Smart.
"I am, yes. I lived there all my life. I was… born… there, too. This is my first time outside the compound, even if I'm still on the Hearts island, at least I'm not on company property. " Roxas said, taking a seat in the chair at his desk. "Sora, where are you from?" He inquired, crossing a leg over the other loosely, his hands folded neatly in his lap.
"I'm from Greece, my parents thought it'd be best if I didn't go to university at home, what with the whole… recession, thing." Sora explained, his heart panging for his parents once more.
"That's unfortunate, Sora. I've read about the situation in Greece and the other southern European countries' financial crises. Shall we go to dinner, then?" Roxas said simply. His voice wasn't disinterested, per se, more very controlled and calm.
"Yeah sure!" Sora hopped to his feet, Roxas standing once more. "And Roxas, it's nice to meet you, I know we'll be good friends." Sora smiled.
"Friends… Axel said he was my friend, I guess I have two friends, now." Roxas thought aloud. Sora blinked, his heart reaching for the other. Only one friend? What kind of place was the Hearts Compound? To make people live such lonely existences.
"Well, you'll have plenty more when I'm done with you." Sora grinned.
The two sat in the bustling dining hall of their dormitory. Sora ate from a plate of pasta, with a thin cheese sauce. Roxas was staring down at a piece of lasagna curiously.
"Don't like lasagna?" Sora inquired, cocking his head to the side while he sucked up a few noodles.
"I've never had it. We didn't have a lot of variety in foods." Roxas said, picking up his fork and sliding into the little structure of flat noodles, meat, and cheese. Roxas eloquently cut through the lasagna, and held the piece of lasagna before his azure eyes, scruitinizing it, before placing it in his mouth.
Sora watched with unveiled glee as Roxas' eyes widened as he chewed. "Is it good?" He asked, leaning forward.
"It's…" Roxas looked down at the square of lasagna, now missing a piece. "It's delicious." Roxas said, nodding to Sora, and taking another bite.
"Man, you didn't really live at all before now, did ya?" Sora chuckled, continuing to eat his own meal, the noodles slowly disappearing, leaving a little pool of watery cheese sauce. Roxas paused at this, looking down at his meal for a long moment, before speaking.
"They… They didn't think I was worth showing new things to. The keepers thought I was a Nobody." Roxas said for a moment, avoiding Sora's gaze, continuing to eat his lasagna.
"A nobody? What, like somebody who has no friends or something?" Sora blinked. "And keepers…?" This seemed strange, and Sora was, obviously, quite confused.
"I'd… I'd rather not talk about it, Sora. Sorry." Roxas said, looking up for a moment.
Sora's heart caught in his throat. He suddenly felt very, very bad. "O-of course, Roxas. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry." Sora said, his appetite suddenly gone.
"It's not your fault, Sora. It's just… it's an ugly thing, Nobodies and the keepers." Roxas said, finishing his square of lasagna, and stood up, pushing his chair back in one fluid motion.
Sora stood as well, watching as Roxas made his way around the table, and he slowly followed, placing a hand on Roxas' shoulder instinctively. "Well, if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm always in the bed across, eh? We're friends now, and friends are there for one another." Sora nodded firmly, squeezing Roxas' shoulder lightly.
Roxas did something that Sora didn't expect then. He smiled a faint smile. "Yeah. Friends are there for one another."
And that is the first chapter, which I have written between classes! Huzzah! Did you like it? I hope so. As always, comments are greatly appreciated, both critiques and compliments!
This story's going in a very different direction than what I'm used to writing, so my inspiration may ebb and flow.