Guidance from above
Authors Note- Hey, I read a book recently about a teenager coping with the death of her mother's breast cancer (one that my sister brought home from school) and it is all in the form of notes and letters. It was such a beautiful book and made me cry on almost every page. Anyways, I was really inspired by it and an idea popped into my head. I've been at the computer writing all day.
If any of you have read any of my past work (yes, the poorly written stories with grammar that sucks) I hope it's going to be nothing like them because I read through them the other day and was actually embarrassed by them. I feel like I have improved but hey, who knows. :
If you guys like this I would really like to make it into a full story, because like I said, I have got such great ideas for this fic and where I am no longer at school I actually have time to write. Although updates will not be everyday, as much as I would love them to be.
So here we go. Hope you enjoy
Summary: After a tragic death in her family, 17 year old Haley James doesn't know what to do in her life. She is lost in grief and is finding it hard to move forward with her life. Deciding her only choice is to start a fresh, she moves across the country to live with her father only to find out life in Tree Hill is harder than she first contemplated- what with Tree Hill's part girl, Brooke Davis, as her newly founded step-sister. And not forgetting the town's biggest bad boy, Nathan Scott, as her hot new next door neighbour.
Prologue
Dear Mom,
This seems a little silly. To be honest I don't really know why I am doing it. Its just…well Vivian said it would help. You know Vivian, always trying to help. She's grieving herself but all she is caring about is taking care of me. Is that selfish of me?
I don't know. I don't seem to know anything anymore; you were always my go-to person whenever I needed advice or telling what to do. I know nothing anymore. I'm empty inside mom…I…I really don't know what to do.
I mean is this really happening? Am I really not going to see your face everyday, making pancakes, singing together in those crazy hats… those crazy hats? Do you remember them mom?
They don't hold as happy memories as they used to mom. Just thinking about them, anything, makes me want to burst into tears and never stop.
Everything just reminds me of you mom, my beautiful, caring, happy mother-the bravest person in the world. I suppose one day that will be a blessing but, right now, I would just much rather forget.
Oh god, that sounds awful doesn't it? What kind of person says that they would just rather forget the wonderful memories they shared with their mother? Well it's obvious isn't it-a terribly horrible one is who.
I am sorry…that's not the person you brought up to be your daughter. That's not the person I am- its just, well, I feel so angry right now mom. I just want to scream at whoever took you away from my world… we didn't have enough time together! Why couldn't we just have 5 more years! 5 more years and then you would be there to see me graduate, go off to college and maybe meet my future husband?
I envy the others - Vivian, Quinn, Joshua and Taylor I mean. You where there for them, you watched Vivian get married and have Anne-Marie. You watched Quinn become a successful journalist, you read very one of her columns and gave her support when she needed it. You were always there for whenever Josh and Tay had troubles at college, coming home drunk as anything, telling you horrendous stories about what they had been up to. But yet you never judged them- they were your children and you helped them out even If they had done something you weren't happy about.
Why can't you be there for me? I've got one more year till I graduate. One more year mom- couldn't you not fight a little longer? Did you not want to watch me grow up?
I'm sorry. I don't mean that its just now I've got to grow up with Dad…the man that left us all when I was 7 years old! Move to a town that I know nobody. Live in a house with no sign of you or the life we lived, just the two of us.
In our little yellow house.
Why? I just….god I cant write no more. This is not a good idea. How on earth is this supposed to help? I am just getting even more upset. Not forgetting sounding like a jealous selfish little girl.
I love you mom, so much. I know I am angry right now…but I'll get pass this. I have faith in that.
Yours forever
H
Xxxx
"Haley? Haley are you okay?" A worried voice asked from down the hallway. Dropping her pen on the floor, watching it fall in slow motion, Haley scattered to her bedroom door. Sliding her self down the wooden barrier, hoping her weight would stop the intruder from entering, she shook in a silent weep.
This feeling, grieve, in her mind was the worst feeling in the world. How on earth could millions of people everyday go through it and came out the other end? The thought seemed to be near impossible to her.
"Haley, move away from the door," her sister, Vivian, gently whispered through the door crack.
Closing her eyes, imagining really hard that her sister would just go downstairs, she almost believed that she had obeyed her unspoken command when there was no noise.
"Haley?"
"No," she breathed out. Her silent weep no longer hushed. "No. I'm fine Viv, I just… I want to be left…left a…a…alone," she sobbed, no longer in control of her emotions. "Please just go."
"Are you sure sweetie? I've got chocolate chip ice-cream?"
When there was no answer, Vivian momentarily closed her eyes.
She didn't know what to do; How to handle a grieving teenager.
Suddenly a memory occurred in her head, rolling through a projector as if it were a movie strip.
It was when she was 15 years old; the day that she found out that Tammy Smith had been burned in a tragic house fire. Tammy Smith, her best friend at the time. It was a horrible day, one that she knew she wouldn't have been able to get through if it wasn't for the support of her mother.
An image appeared in her head, one similar to the current situation she was in with her sister, only it was her on the other end of the door with her mother sitting where she currently was.
Even though no words were spoken throughout that memory between the both of them, the fact that she knew her mother was sitting at the opposite end of the door, singing softly to herself…well it helped her a lot. Less than 20 minutes later she was out of her room, hugging her mom, thanking her for being there for her.
Feeling a tear run down her cheek, Vivian shook her head and opened her eyes. God, what was she going to do without her mom?
This was hell. Pure and utter hell, and worse yet all she could hear was her sister crying her heart out in the room next door.
"Hales, baby I'm not going anywhere." She could hear her voice breaking as she spoke. "I'm going to sit out here and wait until you're ready to talk honey. Just here baby."
Thirty minutes later, the large wooden door slowly opened and all that could be seen were two grieving sisters crying in each others arms…trying to get through the process of accepting their mothers death.
"I miss her so much Viv," Haley cried, holding on to her older sister for dear life.
"I know baby, me too. Me too honey."
"Are you sure she is going to be alright with Dad?" Josh asked Vivian, two hours later when he, Taylor and Vivian were sitting in the kitchen island, all picking at the never-ending stack of lasagne. Why is it that when somebody dies, all neighbours ever seem to bring around is trays and trays of frozen lasagne? The thought seemed a bit strange to Josh.
"I don't know…she reckons she wants to be left here on her own," Vivian sighed. "She reckons 17 years old is more than old enough to live on your own."
"No. That's not going to happen," Josh shock his head. There was no way on this earth that he was going to let his baby sister fend for herself…especially through this hard period of time in their life. "No way, if she really doesn't want to go to dads then I suppose I could drop out of college and move back here-"
"And what, look after her yourself?" Taylor piped in.
"Yeah, I'm more than responsible enough to look after her. I mean I could do with a break from school anyways."
"Don't be an idiot Josh; she would probably end up looking after you! When was the last time you ever went grocery shopping? Or did the laundry? Or- "
Josh screwed up his face. "Oh shut up Taylor, like you can do any of that either!"
"That's not the point! I'm not the one pretending to be a responsible guardian to our little sister."
"Will you two stop that?" Vivian ordered whilst raising a hand to rub her temples. "Jesus, you wouldn't think that we buried our mother only 5 hours ago the way you two are going at it."
"You're right, sorry Viv." Both siblings said in union, the guilt obvious in both of their voices.
"There's nothing to feel sorry about, it's just I'm trying to think of a solution for Haley and we're going to come up with nothing if you two sit here and argue."
Standing up from her seat at the kitchen island, Vivian walked over to the window overlooking the garden. Playing in the garden was her three year old beautiful daughter, Anne –Marie, and even through this painful stage in her life, her daughter still managed to bring a smile to her face.
"I just wish there was room in my house for her, but until Mark gets promoted at work we are not going to be able to have room in our house. Unless she shares rooms with Annie of course….but somehow I think that might not be the best solution."
"What about Quinn?" Taylor asked.
"What with her travelling around for work constantly, I don't think that would be the best idea either."
"Well what about if I just leave school and look after her? I seriously don't -"
"No Josh. You are not going to drop out of school for the sake of me."
All three heads swivelled to the different voice in the room. A look of sheer guilt appeared when they saw Haley in the arms of their other sister, Quinn.
"You don't all need to talk about me as if I'm a baby; I'm almost 17 years old guys."
"Your right Hay, sorry." Josh spoke. Jumping up from his seat, he walked over towards Quinn and took Haley out of her arms, squeezing them both into a hug.
"Are you two okay?" He whispered to them both. He hadn't had the chance to check up on them since the funeral a couple of hours ago, not with all the people at the wake asking him the same patronizing things over and over again. "How are you feeling?" They would all ask. His frigging mother had just lost her battle with breast cancer, how do you think he felt!
"Yeah," Haley spoke, a small smile appearing on her pale sad face. "We were just talking about my arrangements with dad."
"Dad?" The three other siblings asked in shock.
"So you're actually going to live with dad?" Taylor asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yep." Quinn put her arm round Haley's waist and gave her a squeeze of support. "We've been talking about it and came to the conclusion that it's something she has to do, something we are all going to have to put effort into doing too. We've already lost one parent…we don't deserve to not know our other."
Since their father had left their mother 10 years ago, their relationship with him had been somewhat strained; especially for the younger siblings. They did maintain contact with him though, even if he did live hundreds of miles away in a small town called Tree Hill.
However, when he got promoted in his job and re-married to a money grabbing bimbo called Victoria Davis he seemed to be a changed man. None of them seemed to really have contact with him after that, except for that one time at Vivian's wedding.
"Are you sure that's what you want Bub?" Vivian asked Haley.
Haley looked around the kitchen, the kitchen that held so many memories of her and her loving family and nodded her head.
"Yeah, it's what mom would have wanted."
…………………..
I know there were no signs of Naley in this chapter, but this was only the prologue. Giving you some back ground information and stuff.
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