The Mind Blinds What the Heart Feels

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in Kyou Kara Maou nor do I own the series.

Warning: Spoiler for certain episodes.

This fanfic is dedicated to my close friend Kandy who I miss very much.

***

The sky roared as lighting struck as the storm raged on. A lone figure stood near the window of his bed chamber. Lord Wolfram von Bielefeld, third son of Cecile von Spitzweg, looked out the window, lost in thought

The pain and turmoil he felt inside was killing him. Yuuri had denounced the engagement, during dinner in front of everyone. The humiliation he felt then didn't compare to the pain within his shattered heart. He recalled what had happened.

~Flashback~

It was dinner time and everyone was gathered around the dining table. Yuuri glanced around him, looking at everyone seated, then stood up.

"Everyone I have an announcement to make."

Everyone looked at him a little surprised by his sudden interruption, though waited patiently for him to speak.

"I'm sorry for the interruption, but I feel that this is an important matter. I know that I haven't paid much attention to the issue of my engagement to Wolfram so I would like to bring it up now." Wolfram gave him a bewildered look, but stayed quiet as Yuuri continued.

"I know that I haven't done anything about it, but I have come to a decision. I wish to cancel my engagement to Wolfram," everyone gave a round of shocked gasps as Wolfram abruptly stood up from his chair, glaring heatedly at him.

"Why?" He shouted angrily.

Yuuri gave him an apologetic look, though Wolfram ignored it, waiting for him to answer his question.

"Because Wolfram I just don't feel that way about you, and it's wrong for me to lead you on when there's nothing between us. You're a great person and anyone would be lucky to have you it's just that my feelings only go so far as friendship and nothing more, but I would like us to still be friends." Yuuri stated softly.

Wolfram gazed at the ground, trying to hide how he was feeling. He headed towards the door, but not before getting his point across, "I love you, but you refuse to see it because you can't accept me for being a male. I appreciate your offer of friendship although I cannot accept. Please do me the favour just this once and leave me alone. From now on I am nothing but a subject of yours heika." The door slammed shut after his retreat.

~End of Flashback~

Alone in his room Wolfram refused to let his tears fall. He was not going to cry for a wimp like him. He was disgusted by his weak hold on his emotions as he was a soldier trained not to feel. Unfortunately, this time he couldn't fight against it as the tears spilled from his eyes. He cried uncontrollably, falling to his knees not caring if anyone heard him. He let out all the pent up emotion within him, willing the pain to go away.

***

Few days after the incident, Wolfram refused to talk to anyone, preferring to be alone, eating in his room, and committing himself to his duties. Yuuri had tried to console him, but failed miserably as he ignored him not giving him a second glance. He only spoke when it concerned his needed assistance for border patrol or anything related to his duties.

Yuuri sat in his office trying to sign the documents that Gwendal had left him, but was too preoccupied to focus much. He was worried about Wolfram, being the cause for his behaviour. Wolfram wouldn't even acknowledge him and it hurt considering that he saw Wolfram as his best and loyal friend in this world. He deserved it anyway for breaking the blonde knight's heart for he had heard Wolfram crying on that night.

Sighing, Yuuri looked out the window behind him, spotting the blonde training his soldiers. He smiled softly, watching his ex-fiancé gracefully demonstrating his sword skills. He felt a stab of pain in his heart, seeing the blonde. He hated himself for hurting him, but he couldn't pretend to like Wolfram when he didn't. However, he did miss his ex-fiancé's presence and constant accusations of him being a "cheater". He liked the time they spent together when going on their journeys, but now it was not the same with Wolfram avoiding him. There was a knock at the door.

"Come in," Yuuri replied.

The door opened to reveal Greta standing at the door unsure as to whether to come in or not.

"It's alright Greta you can come in, I'm not busy." Yuuri reassured her.

She ran to give him a big hug. Yuuri caught her in his arms, hugging her right back. Greta pulled away, looking at Yuuri with concern.

"Yuuri, why are you and Wolfram not talking to each other?"

"It's hard to explain Greta." Yuuri said.

"Why?" She prodded.

"Well it's just that… well… um see… me and Wolfram aren't… well engaged anymore so I think I hurt his feelings." Yuuri told her as best as he could.

"Don't you like Wolfram, daddy? Because I like Wolfram, and I want him to be my other papa." She said quietly yet sadly.

Yuuri felt horrible, knowing how much Greta adored Wolfram as he was the one who took care of her when he was back on earth.

"I do like Wolfram it's just that well… I don't have more than friendly feelings for him." It killed him telling Greta that.

"But Yuuri, Wolfram really likes you and whenever you're not around he always looks sad, especially when you're in your other world."

Yuuri knew Wolfram got lonely when he wasn't around, and it touched him to know the blonde cared for him so much to the point of missing him even though he didn't show it. There was another knock at the door as Yuuri looked up to see Doria, one of the maids, standing there.

"Heika, it's time for Greta to get back to her lessons." Bowing as she said it.

"Alright, time to go Greta, but I'll see you during supper ok?" Yuuri told her.

Greta nodded as Doria took her away to her lessons. Yuuri got up from the ground to get back to signing the papers not wanting to anger Gwendal.

***

Wolfram, getting back from the baths went straight to his room as usual. He changed into his blue stripped, white cotton pyjama pants and shirt, not wearing his pink negligee as it was of no use to him anymore. He lay on the bed, looking up at the ceiling. He knew that the others were worried about him, but he didn't care. He didn't want to see the pity and sympathy reflecting in their eyes. It still hurt him to know Yuuri didn't love him, but he was trying to get over it though it was hard.

***

Yuuri lay in his bed, thinking about what Greta had said. The fact that Greta wanted them to be together stirred strange feelings within him. The thought of him and Wolfram being together was a difficult concept for him to grasp. He'd been told all his life that being with another guy was wrong and immoral. Somehow Yuuri didn't think it fair to hate someone for liking their same sex just like for a human to like a mazoku or vice versa. Then it hit him, he was basically contradicting himself by saying it doesn't matter who you love when in reality he's been saying how it's wrong for two guys to be together.

Realizing his foolish mistake, Yuuri now knew what Wolfram meant when he said that he couldn't see how much he loved him just because he was a male. Hitting his head against his pillow Yuuri tried to analyze his feelings towards Wolfram without his preconceived notions about men being together. Thinking on it now, he pictured himself with the blonde knight.

Wolfram was a beautiful boy, having gotten most of his traits from his mother Lady Celi. Even though he was temperamental, he was a loyal and loving person at heart and would do anything for his loved ones, him being one of those loved ones. So why was it so hard for him to accept being with Wolfram? The blonde cared about him deeply and always stood by him no matter what. And if he recalled correctly Wolfram had once said that he would fall with him when he was hanging off that cliff. He also remembered how he had gone after Wolfram when he was kidnapped by those magic controlled dolls. The feeling of panic hitting him immensely, losing all rational thought as he had taken Ao, his horse, to try and save Wolfram, but being kidnapped in the process too.

Wolfram had done so much for him without asking much from him, but for him to stay by his side and protect him as his fiancé and loyal subject. Yuuri feeling a sense of strong guilt regretted not ever noticing the things Wolfram did for him. The strange feelings from before came back to him and with shock he discovered why he was feeling this way. Somehow without his own knowledge he had unknowingly fallen for the blonde prince, taken note of the fact that it all had to with his mind telling him it was wrong not his heart. With this new revelation, Yuuri was determined to get Wolfram back into his life for he owed the prince his heart and his life.

***

Wolfram slowly opened his eyes, cursing at the suns bright rays, streaming into his room. He got up to get ready for the day, changing into his blue uniform while fixing himself up to look presentable. Walking out of his room he headed straight for the kitchen to grab something to eat to get started on his tasks for the day.

Yuuri was in the baths, thinking about approaching Wolfram without him giving him the cold shoulder. Then it hit him, he knew what he had to do to make stubborn prince to talk to him. Getting out of the bath he headed towards his room to get changed and join everyone at breakfast.

Training his soldiers, a messenger came up to Wolfram, telling him that the king wanted to see him and it was urgent. Wolfram being a little suspicious went anyway since he was under the king's command no matter what. Reaching the office door he knocked.

"Come in," hearing the reply from Yuuri he opened the door.

Wolfram, after closing the door, chose to stay near it not wanting to get too close. Yuuri had his back to him, staring out the window. Wolfram was getting a little impatient, having other things to do.

"Heika, I'm sorry for being rude, but can you please get whatever it is you want to tell me out now. I'm on busy schedule." Wolfram stated curtly.

Yuuri finally turned around to look at him with hurt shining in his eyes. Wolfram was taken aback by the emotion reflecting there, but didn't do anything just staying at the same spot.

"Wolfram, I'm sorry for keeping you, but I wish to get some things off my chest. I would like for you to just listen now and then ask anything you want when I'm done."

Wolfram looked at him, feeling apprehensive not sure he wanted to hear this, but nodded out of respect to his king.

"Look, I know me and you haven't had eye to eye ever since I cancelled the engagement," pausing to look at Wolfram he continued, "I'm sorry for the pain I've caused, but know it wasn't intentional. However, I must admit that I miss you, not having you around hurts and Greta misses you too. I've been thinking, trying to come to grips with myself that what I did was right because I can't pretend to love or like you while leading you on."

Wolfram felt his old emotions resurfacing though trying to hold them back

"I was wrong about what I felt for you. I let my mind do all the talking for me, ignoring my heart's plea. I was blinded by all the stupid things that meant nothing, causing me to not see what I had and what I wanted, no needed. It would be stupid of me to think you'll accept what I'm saying to you, but know this I care about you. I wouldn't mind spending the rest of my life with you as long as you're by my side taking care of Greta with me for she loves you as her second father."

Head downcast, Wolfram was too lost and hurt to look at Yuuri, not sure how to respond to him. Yuuri gazed at him, his heart strings tugging painfully, wanting to just comfort the blonde, but refrained from doing so as Wolfram spoke up.

"Why now, when I've been waiting so long to hear this from you, am I a joke to you." He said brokenly.

"No! You are not a joke, you are Wolfram my best friend, my loyal prince, and most of all my first love." Yuuri said softly.

Wolfram looked at him shocked by his words though was even more so when he saw the tears flowing from his eyes.

"Yuuri," Wolfram whispered softly.

"I'm sorry Wolfram, I really am." Yuuri said to him.

Wolfram stood frozen to his spot still not sure about this whole predicament. He looked at Yuuri still a bit shocked. He didn't know whether to accept or to just walk away and ignore it. However, something was holding him back; if he guessed right it would be his heart telling him to give Yuuri a second chance because love like this only came once to those lucky enough to have it. Still the pain Yuuri caused was unforgettable, and not something easily forgiven for, but Yuuri was different for he didn't know what it was like to like someone of the same gender, Wolfram understood that even though he thought it was ridiculous.

Taking a step towards Yuuri while having a conflict within himself he stopped just a little way from where he was standing, still trying to keep some distance between them. He looked at Yuuri straight in the eyes as Yuuri stared right back. Not knowing what to do Wolfram spoke up.

"I still love you wimp, but I'm not sure if I can fully recover from this. However, I want to give it a try." Wolfram stated quietly.

Yuuri gave him a soft smile, before lifting his right hand up and striking him softly on his left cheek once again, though out of love than anger. Wolfram eyes widen at his sudden boldness. Suddenly, tears spilled from his eyes out of happiness as he hugged Yuuri with all his heart and soul not caring anymore. Yuuri hugged back just as enthusiastically. They enjoyed the embrace for awhile longer before the two slowly pulled away, gazing at each other with small smiles on their faces. Slowly Yuuri leaned his down a little, brushing his lips against Wolfram before adding more pressure. Wolfram leaned in further into the kiss, wanting more as his insides melted with pleasure. Yuuri obliged and deepened the kiss by tracing his tongue across Wolfram's lips, asking for entrance which Wolfram gladly granted. Opening his mouth as their tongues made contact, sparking strong emotions of love and desire within them. However, they pulled away, needing air back into their lungs. Staying in the embrace Yuuri whispered into Wolfram's ear.

"I love you Wolf."

"I love you too you wimp." Wolfram replied, smirking at him.

Yuuri gave him a playful glare, though said nothing, holding his blonde prince in his arms not wanting to ever let go. With the two finally back together things went back to its usual ways. Yuuri and Wolfram still arguing over trivial things, though this time things were a little different with the two loving each other and living as happily as they can together.

***

Hope you enjoyed this fanfic. It would be much appreciated if you told what you think of it. Thanks for reading.