A Good Day

by dwparsnip

Rodney is having a bad day, and it gets worse when his secret getaway is occupied. In the end though, it’s a good day… McKeller of course. Do I write anything else these days?

Again, I don't own Stargate Atlantis or any of its characters. MGM does as far as I know.

I envision this taking place sometime in early season five. No episode tags or spoilers. Well, maybe a tag for "Duet" as events in it are mentioned.

All mistakes are mine and all comments are welcome.

-0-0-

Rodney strode purposefully through the stark corridors of Atlantis, only barely noticing the looks of irritation he received from those he all but shoved out of his way.

It had been a hell of a morning. First he had been deprived of his life-giving morning cup of coffee by those gluttonous Marines who swarmed into the Mess just before him and devoured everything within sight. He never even bothered to try to part the sea of camouflage to get to the pot- he knew it was pointless and Moses he wasn't.

Having grudgingly forsaken his cup of precious java, he started towards the lab only to turn the corner and run into someone, (he never did bother to see who it was), carrying a cup of coffee in their hands. The coffee, being held out in front of the person as it was and the high velocity at which he was travelling due to his profound irritation, made the stain now gracing the front of his uniform shirt so large and spread out that nearly the entire front side of his shirt was darker than the rest of it.

It was at that point that he figured that his day couldn't get any worse.

It was a scant few minutes later when he walked into his lab that he realized he could not have been more wrong about that.

One of his more inept minions had managed through a sheer stroke of stupidity to ruin an experiment he had been conducting for three weeks concerning the decay rate of a substance that held some promise as a power source. Now, thanks to whatever the hell his name was- he never could remember what it was, nor did he care to try anymore- he not only had to redo the extensive and tedious prep work for the experiment, but he had to obtain more of the substance from PDR-431. Getting some of the ore from the natives the first time had been costly enough- Keller had been less than thrilled with giving up so many medical supplies- and he had no doubt that acquiring a second sample would also be outrageously expensive.

Just as he began to cool down from tearing a strip off of what's-his-name's backside, Zelenka informed him that three of the eight power couplings supplying the lab had overloaded because of what's-his-name's idiocy and needed to be repaired.

If he hadn't been so incredibly pissed at everything and everyone he may have laughed. As it was, for the safety of those present and, most importantly, his own sanity, he told Zelenka to handle it and left without saying another word to anyone.

He left the lab with the intention of going back to his quarters and retrieving a clean shirt, then heading to the control room to go and get another sample for his experiment- he didn't dare allow anyone else to do it.

Alas, it was not to be, for the straw that broke the camel's back met him about halfway there.

Sheppard had the most bizarre look of delight on his face when he recited verbatim the regulations stating that all Atlantis personnel assigned to off-world teams were required to recertify their weapons training every six months without exception.

Rodney nearly quit the whole works and went home to Earth when Sheppard stated smugly that Rodney's six months had expired the day before and he'd be unable to accompany the team off-world until he recertified. More to the point considering the events of the morning, he would not be allowed to go to PDR-431 and get the new sample for the experiment that he had to redo through no fault of his own.

He told Sheppard where to go and how to get there in blunt, deafening and animated detail. Sheppard's look of shock only slightly dampened his increasingly dour mood, and he stormed past his team leader and good friend for parts unknown. It wasn't until he'd aimlessly roamed the halls for two minutes that he decided that his secret hiding place was needed.

He turned the corner and headed for the nearest set of stairs that would take him to his secret hiding place. It was a balcony that wasn't listed on any of the plans or floor maps of the city and appeared to be added after the city's initial construction. Even the entrance to the balcony wasn't a door as they had come to know it, that is to say that it didn't automatically open when you approached it nor did it have an obvious hand sensor or door knob or handle.

He allowed himself a self-satisfied smile as he climbed the steps and approached the concealed entrance to the balcony. It was only his rabid curiosity that allowed him to find the place to begin with months earlier. A little anomalous and annoying power fluctuation that showed up in the sensor logs was what started the ball rolling, and three hours after setting out to discover its source he stood in front of the wall in the stairwell that he was situated in now. He stopped on the appropriate landing and looked around to make sure that there weren't any unwanted observers watching him, and satisfied that he was alone he opened the door. During his initial examination, it took him two hours to discover the un-Ancient like latching mechanism that was carefully concealed in the top right hand corner of the panel. He hadn't been able to figure out why it wasn't on the plans, or why it was in such an unorthodox location, or why it didn't have a conventional 'door-knob', or why the city sensors were blind in that area, but at times like these he didn't much give a damn.

Especially at times like these. It had become over time a haven that he could escape to and breathe in the fresh sea air, to think and just stare out onto the bright blue ocean and let the crushing responsibility he'd taken on melt from his shoulders, if only for a few moments. There wasn't room for much else really…it was only big enough for two or three people to stand on.

He stepped through the opening and made certain that the door closed behind him and then took a deep breath of salty air. The tension in his body began to dissipate almost immediately, until he heard something that brought it back with full and maddening force: a sigh that wasn't his own.

He looked forward toward the open part of the small balcony and saw a shapely figure facing the ocean, her hands resting on the upper rail and her right leg lifted so it rested on the lower rail. The aforementioned shapeliness and blond ponytail left no doubt in his mind that the unwelcome intruder in his realm was Jennifer Keller. She obviously hadn't heard him come out onto the balcony, and part of him wanted to turn on his heels and walk back out through the door without making a sound. Granted, it was a very small part of him. The rest wanted to rear back and let her have it, and he pointed at her and opened his mouth to do exactly that when another sound emanated from her that made him stop dead in his tracks: a sniffle, followed in short order by her raising her hand up to her face and obviously wiping something away, something like…tears!

"Crap!" thought Rodney, suddenly more in favor of leaving undetected than he had been before. He was uncomfortable enough around women, especially beautiful, intelligent, blond women who, it could be argued, flirted with him on occasion.

At least he was told she flirted with him. He would only admit it to himself but he wouldn't know flirting if it patted him on the ass.

Of course, what only increased his unease around the fair doctor was the fact that he was attracted to her, and why wouldn't he be? And of course, there was that other thing…

He gulped down the nasty obstruction that had formed in his throat and took a step back towards the door when something that sounded suspiciously like a soft sob came from Keller. He just caught himself from asking her if she was all right when the damnedest thing happened: he stepped towards her!

He had no idea what he was going to say or what he was going to do, but it didn't matter. When he was right behind her he placed his hand on her shoulder, and he was surprised by the fact that she didn't jump or otherwise appear to be startled. Maybe he hadn't been as stealthy as he thought.

He lowered his hand to his side as she turned around to face him and he nearly grimaced at the sight of her. It was no trouble to know that she had been crying, for her eyes were red and the wet trails left on her cheeks by the descending tears glistened blatantly in the morning sunlight. And her hair- usually so neat it was nauseating, either in a ponytail with nary a strand out of place or down and flowing about her head like a silk cloak- was in total disarray as though she had been asleep and got up without even trying to fix it.

More than all of that though her eyes were hollow, the same type of thing that he'd seen often in the mirror after staying up for far too long trying to do impossible things.

She looked into his eyes, and though it made him more than a little uncomfortable he kept his gaze locked onto hers.

She took in a deep breath and let it out in a rush as she folded her arms across her chest, or at least that was what he thought at first. It took him a second to realize that she was, in fact, hugging herself against some sort of invisible frost that only she could feel.

His brilliant and analytical mind sprung into action. Jennifer was here, in a secret, (so he thought), place that only he, (again, so he thought), knew of; she was obviously very tired and extremely upset, perhaps even distraught; the only crisis that had occurred lately was the firefight that Lorne's team was involved in on P3X-139 three days earlier…Franzen! He was shot in the abdomen and according to Sheppard was in bad shape. The rumor mill was saying, (not that he really considered the rumor mill to be a valuable source of information), that Jennifer had been working around the clock to save the young man that almost everyone, especially Jennifer, liked. He personally didn't know Franzen well, but Sheppard, Teyla and Ronon spoke very highly of him, and he could remember walking into the Mess once and finding Jennifer laughing uncontrollably as Franzen was leaving her table. When Rodney walked up to the table she felt compelled to explain of Franzen, "He's like the younger brother I never had!"

She must have seen the realization in his eyes, for she nodded and her face contorted slightly as she tried to hold in another sob. Her right hand moved shakily up to her mouth to aid in the effort and she succeeded…barely.

"Franzen didn't make it," he stated quietly, earning a rapid shake of Keller's head in response.

As a fresh set of tears began streaming down her slightly flushed cheeks, Rodney's discomfort level rose significantly and the vast majority of his mind screamed at him to run away and get someone for her, someone who could help her through the pain she was going through. Sheppard was good at that sort of thing, or Heightmeyer or Teyla- someone who was good with people and emotions, someone other than him. Anyone other than him!

Still, the minute part of his mind that remembered all the times she had treated him when he'd been injured, invariably with a kind and sympathetic smile upon her angelic face, somehow maintained control and Rodney watched more than felt his hands move to her shoulders. It was an odd sensation, watching his body do something that he didn't explicitly order it to do, and it was oddly reminiscent of when Cadman shared his mind and she took control of his body and, well, that wasn't important right now.

What was important was the way Jennifer was looking at him, as though she were adrift on the ocean that currently surrounded the city and he was her lifeline. It was a scary thought for him, being there for someone in such a way. He simply hadn't been that good at it, as a rule.

Jennifer seemed to think otherwise, and he just barely managed to keep his posture from stiffening out of reflex when she took the necessary step forward to cuddle into him. His arms, unaccustomed as they were to hugging damsels in distress, hung limply at his side for nearly a minute as her face snuggled into his chest and her arms tightened around his waist. Finally his arms started to make their way up to hug her, but advanced only a couple of inches before aborting the attempt. They made three ultimately unsuccessful attempts to move up around her shoulders until finally, on the fourth attempt and with a fortifying push from a sense of chivalry that he never knew he possessed, his arms moved upward and rested on her back at shoulder height, pulling her closer to him than he thought she should have been. And to his credit, he was able to keep from giving an apprehensive sigh as sob after sob tore from her lips into his shirt.

He stood there in silence holding Jennifer, allowing her to release her emotions and in complete awe of her ability to do it so easily. There were times, many times since coming to Atlantis, that he wished he could release his pent up emotions as easily. Admittedly the emotions in question were almost exclusively anger and frustration, but the principle was the same.

Finally Jennifer's sobs lessened in frequency, then tapered down to a sad whimper or two and then ended altogether. She took a deep breath and leaned her head back enough to look up at him.

He was expecting her to apologize for her outburst and drenching his already stained shirt, or perhaps a verbal expression of gratitude for being there for her, so he could forgive himself for his shock and surprised grunt of laughter when she asked with a hoarse voice, "Why does your shirt smell like coffee?"

His reaction, as honest as it was, at least gave her cause to try to smile. It was incomplete and it didn't reach her eyes, but it was a start.

"Someone decided that their precious coffee would look better on me than taste better in their stomach," he said, anger at the event seeping into his voice. "Naturally I don't concur with that opinion."

Jennifer nodded distractedly and looked to his shirt. "And now it's wet again." She looked up at him. "I'm sorry."

He wasn't sure if it was the sorry state of her appearance, the eerie quietness of her voice and the lack of humor and cheeriness that he was accustomed to hearing from her, or the tear still making its way down her cheek but his response was, "Yes…well no harm done, I suppose."

She nodded appreciatively and stepped out of his reach, then turned to resume her previous position at the rail overlooking the ocean. After a moment he turned as well and stepped up to the balcony to her left, resting his hands on the rail as she was doing.

"I couldn't save him," she said without turning towards him. "All my knowledge and all the technology we have and I still couldn't save him."

Rodney took a deep breath and gazed out at the horizon. How often had he had the same feeling in the past five years? How often had he gone into a situation where he was expected to save the day and despite his vast knowledge and the wondrous technology at his disposal he failed? There had been a few, certainly not as many as there could have been, but try telling that to Peter Grodin or Brendan Gaul or Carson or the one that hurt the most, Elizabeth.

"Yes, well, I'm sure you did all you could," stated Rodney without any inflection at all. He was sure he was coming across as being crass, but she had to know he wasn't particularly good at this sort of thing. "I mean, maybe he was just beyond saving and there was nothing you could do, or anyone could do, I mean." He paused for a second and remembered something Sheppard told him once when he was lamenting over being unable to save Elizabeth and blaming himself for her loss in the first place. "Unfortunately, you can't save them all. All you can do is your best." He sighed and turned his head towards her. "Sometimes it's enough, and sometimes it isn't."

Jennifer seemed to consider that for a moment, and then she nodded before looking down to the water lapping against Atlantis underneath them. "I know. Franzen isn't the first patient I…I couldn't save, it's just…I don't know." She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders. After a moment she turned to him and said with a wisdom that others might have thought was beyond her because of her young age, "You know the feeling, don't you?"

He swallowed hard and looked back out over the blue water ahead of them. "I have been known not to succeed once or twice," he conceded after a moment. Out of the corner of his eye he saw her nod in understanding and look out over the water as he was doing. He silently thanked her for not pressing that point any further.

"Thank you, Rodney," she said as she turned towards him a heartbeat later. He nearly jumped when her hand slipped underneath his and lifted it up off the rail in one rapid yet smooth movement. She encouraged him to turn and face her by gently pulling his arm to her left, and when they were facing each other her free hand reached over and took his so that she was holding both his hands. "I mean it," she said as she looked into his eyes, "thank you. I needed that."

"Yes, well, you're welcome," he stated with his trademark quickness. "We all need a pick-me-up every once in a while, right? At least that's what Sheppard's says every time he takes it upon himself to try to play psychiatrist. The man thinks he's…"

He stopped his blathering when he became aware of and then distracted by the way her thumbs were caressing the backs of his hands, but he mentally shook himself out of it and said, "I think you know what I mean." She smiled again, and this time her smile was a little bigger and a tiny bit brighter. "Are you going to, you know, be okay?"

She sighed as she nodded. "Like I said, I've gone through this before," she managed a half-hearted smirk and added, "once or twice." Her smirk disappeared and her face became serious. "But it never gets easier. These people depend on me, and every time I lose one of them it seems as though I let them down. I know no one thinks that," she added quickly when he frowned at her comment, "and I don't really, I know I try my best. I just need time to deal with it," she gave his hands a gentle squeeze, "or someone who understands to give me a little push in the right direction."

Rodney looked down to their hands and for a second he enjoyed the feeling, but as if a switch was thrown deep within the recesses of his massive intellect the enjoyment vanished and was replaced by discomfort causing him pull his hands away, albeit gently.

He pointed around the small balcony with an extended index finger and asked, "How did you find this place, by the way?"

Jennifer clasped her hands in front of her and glanced around the small open area before saying, "I was exploring the city one night and came down the stairs outside, and that panel was open," she said with a gesture of her head to the entrance. "It wasn't open much and I almost didn't see it but when I pushed on the panel it opened and I found this." She took a deep breath and smiled after letting it out. "I thought it was the perfect hiding place for when I needed to think or," she shrugged her shoulders, "when I just needed to be alone."

Rodney frowned again at the thought of his secret hideaway being discovered.

"No one else knows," Jennifer said as though she knew what he was thinking. "You're the first person I've seen here and I haven't told anyone."

"Good," he said tightly. "We should keep it that way then, between us I mean." His eyes shifted and he found himself once again looking into her eyes. "I suppose it's ok if we share this hideaway." Her quickly hidden grin told him that he'd said something…"Crap!" "Not share together at the same time. I mean we can both use it at different times." He pointed nervously to her. "You here by yourself," he pointed his thumb towards his chest, "and me here by myself, at different times."

Jennifer ignored his rambling and nodded in agreement. They stood there, staring at each other for another minute before it became too much for Rodney to take. He shifted on his feet and pointed to the door. "I should go and…well, there are things that need…my shirt! I should go and change my shirt, then go and make sure the lab is still in one piece and see if I can salvage my ruined experiment." Something occurred to him and to Keller's obvious amusement he cursed, then said with a groan, "I have to recertify for my weapons training before I can go off world."

"Sounds like you're having a rough day too," commented Jennifer, and though her voice was more neutral than anything else her eyebrows darted upward amusedly as she spoke.

Rodney nodded automatically and then stopped and looked at Jennifer intently. "I'm sorry…about Franzen, I mean. I know you liked him."

Jennifer smiled, and this time it shone like the sun. "Thank you, Rodney. He was like…"

"…the little brother you never had," finished Rodney for her in a rush.

Jennifer's eyes opened wide in surprise for an instant. "Yes, the little brother I never had." Her eyes narrowed and her mouth formed a quirky little smile as she added, "I'm surprised you remembered."

"Hello, genius over here!" he said with an unnecessary wave of his hand. "I remember all the important things I hear, thank you very much."

Jennifer's mouth opened slightly as the significance of that comment sunk in. "You thought what I said to you that day was important?"

Rodney's eyes opened wide in disbelief of his gaffe. He tried to think of several things to say to try to cover up or otherwise deflect attention away from what he'd admitted to, but everything he could think of was either condescending, biting, sarcastic or the like. Ordinarily, one of those would be his first choice, that being his nature and all, but Jennifer's still slightly red eyes and frazzled hair reminded him that she was here, in his secret getaway, because she herself was having a hell of a day.

"Of course I did…you were talking to me weren't you?" he said, his eyes narrowed in annoyance that was proven false by the upturned corners of his mouth.

"Of course. I'm sorry for doubting you, Rodney," she replied with a smirk of her own. After a moment she laughed and Rodney couldn't help but be caught up in its infectiousness and join in.

"Well I should head back to the Infirmary, I guess," she said when the laughter died down. She smiled sadly and added, "There's some paperwork I have to do."

Rodney nodded quickly and motioned to the door with his hand. "Yes, I suppose I'll see later then."

"Yes you will," responded Jennifer, and this time her smile was a little happier. She started to move towards the door but stopped after taking a single step and turned back to face Rodney.

Before he could ask her what she was doing she reached her right hand up and placed it gently on his cheek, then leaned up and pressed her lips against the other cheek in what he would have classified as the sweetest, gentlest kiss he'd ever received.

Jennifer leaned back, and with her hand still on his cheek she said, "Thank you, Rodney."

Before he could say anything she lowered her hand and started walking to the door. He watched, slightly dazed from that little kiss, as Jennifer opened the door and poked her head through enough to make sure no one could see her emerge from the hidden balcony. When she was satisfied the coast was clear she stepped through, hesitating only long enough to give him a quick glance and wave good-bye.

When he heard the latch catch, he turned around and faced the ocean. For a moment he watched the waves roll across his field of vision and then reached up and tentatively touched where her soft lips kissed his cheek.

It had come as a surprise, naturally. He didn't expect her to kiss him, nor was he sure that he wanted her to. The last thing he needed was a taste of something that he didn't deserve.

He sighed and thought about that other thing: the future. Sheppard had been there and simply couldn't help himself; it was in his nature to make seemingly off handed and ambiguous comments at the best of times, and the future he had seen had been his favorite topic of late. Rodney ignored the barbs at first, taking them as Sheppard reminding them all that he knew something that they didn't know and he wasn't going to tell them, but after a while Rodney tried to figure out exactly what it was John was trying to say.

It didn't take him long to see that Sheppard was amused with something, and with some thought Rodney was able to figure it out- he was a genius after all. Most of Sheppard's comments related to his amusement and disbelief with a certain event and it was clear that those feelings were directed at Rodney, at least partially. Rodney also noticed after some time and study that Sheppard's remarks became really pointed, in a juvenile sort of way, when the topic of relationships came up. Ergo Sheppard was talking about Rodney's future love life, or possible future; they had, after all, already skewered that timeline with Sheppard's erased disappearance and Teyla's rescue.

What clinched it for Rodney though, was the impossibly smug smirk Sheppard had on his face whenever he issued one of his jabs at Rodney when a certain female was around, that certain female being Jennifer. It wasn't a blatant smirk that others would have seen or noticed, and Rodney only noticed because he was paying particular attention to Sheppard during those times.

Yet the meaning was clear, even to someone who was habitually terrible at seeing such things as Rodney was. In the future that Sheppard saw, Rodney and Jennifer were a couple and Sheppard thought it was funny as hell.

Bastard.

He leaned forward and rested his elbows on the railing and folded his hands together in front of him as he watched the waves.

He sighed and let himself get lost in thought for a moment, the thought of being with Jennifer. The instant flood of positive emotional energy that flooded his senses was as foreign to him and as pervasive as the feelings that assaulted him when he was exposed to the Wraith enzyme.

And while these emotions felt much more pleasurable, they were almost as scary. It was astoundingly terrifying to him that simply thinking about being with Jennifer reawakened those emotions within him and perhaps, and no insult to Katie, instilled some new ones within him as well.

Rodney shook himself from those thoughts and stood up straight. He took a deep breath in through his nose and was reminded by the still potent smell of coffee that he needed a new shirt.

He turned around to face the door and nearly had a heart attack, which a tiny part of his mind thought was okay because a doctor just happened to be very nearby.

"Are you trying to kill me?" growled McKay with a clutch at his chest for good measure. "I thought you had paperwork to do! You could have at least let me know that you were standing there like some sort of stalker! If we're going to share this place we're going to have to work out some sort of schedule or system…" He stopped his rant and took in the sight of Jennifer before him.

She was looking straight at him, her brown eyes boring into his blue ones as though guided by laser sights. His eyes flicked to her hands clasped together in front of her, her thumbs twitching against each other in…nervousness?

McKay did a quick survey of the area as he asked, "Did you forget something?" Without waiting for an answer he swallowed hard and managed to squeak out, "Is something wrong?"

Jennifer shook her head with a deliberateness that worried him. He watched as she took in a generous breath of air and then slowly release it.

"What's wrong?"

He didn't even realize it was he that asked the question until Jennifer responded with, "Nothing. I just…"

She stopped talking and walked towards him until she was only inches away from him. Without saying anything else, both her hands reached up and rested on his cheeks sending something akin to an electrical current into his body. Before he could even think about what she was going to do next he felt himself being pulled, gently but with enough force to tell him to allow it or else, towards her.

Most his higher brain functions went into standby mode when her eyes fluttered shut and her mouth opened ever so slightly; they ceased operations altogether a moment later when their lips touched for the first time.

Unlike Jennifer, Rodney was wide-eyed with incredulity. He stayed that way until Jennifer's mouth moved softly against his and her arms snaked up around his neck with her hands clasping together behind his neck. It was at that point, with the cerebral part of his mind incapacitated, that those basic emotional instincts that he'd long forgotten that he had kicked in. His eyes slammed shut and his arms moved up and around Jennifer's waist, not necessarily pulling her towards him but more or less ensuring that, should she finally realize what it was she was doing, she wouldn't be able to run away.

His mouth matched the movement of hers and the dance began in earnest. He lost track of how long they were at it- all he knew was that when they did stop and he looked down into her eyes, they were clear and unapologetic.

And she was breathing hard.

And so was he.

"What was that for?" he asked, forgetful for a moment that his brain had taken a long overdue holiday.

The right side of her mouth edged upward and a playful glint came to her eyes. "Do I really need to spell it out for you, Rodney?" she asked.

His head snapped back and he sputtered, "What? No, it's just- it isn't everyday that a woman walks up to me and, well, does what you did. At least not a woman in her right mind…"

Her eyes were dancing with laughter as she said jokingly, "I should hope not. Colonel Sheppard gets enough of that for you, Ronon and half the male population of Atlantis."

While he thought it was a particularly good jab at Sheppard, he was far too nervous and unsure about what had happened to truly appreciate it, and then Freud seemed to channel through him and inspiration hit. His eyes bulged open as he exclaimed, "That's it, isn't it? You're not in your right mind! You've taken temporary leave of senses due to the grief you feel over Franzen's death and…"

"No, Rodney," she said with a slight shake of her head. Her right hand moved from its resting place on the back of his neck and worked its way to his cheek, and then down to his chest, stopping to rest just above his heart. She looked down to her hand and said softly, "A lot of things have happened lately to make me realize that time is a precious thing, Rodney." She looked back up to his eyes. "I know you're not particularly good at this sort of thing so I will spell it out for you." She took a second to organize her thoughts and then said quietly, "We have a lot in common you and I. I respect you, I'm attracted to you and I like you, and I think that maybe you like me too." She waited for confirmation from him and smiled when he finally nodded hesitantly. "I would like to explore what could happen between us." Her voice was crisp with confidence and remained serious as she asked, "It doesn't get much plainer than that, does it? What do you think?"

He was tempted to admit that his thinking process was virtually nonexistent. Instead he took all of half a second to think about it and said, "Yes. Yes I think would like that. Very much"

She smiled and said, "Maybe it's a good day after all."

Rodney nodded, and as he leaned down to kiss her again he said, "A very good day."