If Things Were Different
disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
Lil' seven-year old Sakura was feeling quite good for herself recently, Ino had recently taken the shy billboard brow under her wing and the budding friendship was doing wonders for Sakura's self confidence
Lil' seven-year old Sakura was feeling quite good for herself recently, Ino had recently taken the shy billboard brow under her wing and the budding friendship was doing wonders for Sakura's self confidence. Good thing too since many people made fun of her funny-colored hair and above-average sized forehead.
It would have been much worse if they knew she had been addicted to crack since birth.
Yep Haruno Sakura was a crack baby living with her single mother that was loaded up on cocaine for the majority of every day since her dad had died. Unfortunately Sakura had to smoke the stuff too since she was addicted as well.
She wasn't affected mentally by the stuff, like most addicts were. In fact it almost didn't affect her negatively at all avoiding the many health risks such as the harmful affect on the heart, liver and lungs.
Her late father had put a seal on her chest that did this for her. He had caught on to his wife's depression-induced tendencies and had gotten to work immediately after Sakura was born. Unless she hadn't had any for an extended period of time though, she was seriously screwed up, suffering from delusions and hallucinations as well as monster headaches later on. The seal would not have worked on anyone but an infant.
Currently she was fine (for now) and hangin' with Ino during flower arrangement class. She wondered why exactly kunoichi had to learn the feminine arts as well as seduction. What if the target was gay? Do the male shinobi have 'gay seduction classes'? She shivered to herself.
After Ino had delivered to her a confidence-inspiring speech after seeing Sakura bummed out about knowing squat about flowers, the pinkette started to garner hope for the future.
"Looks like someone has been doing a lot of primping lately" the two looked up and came face to face with one of Sakura's constant antagonists, "What makes you think you're worth the effort?"
That killed the mood for Sakura, all of Ino's words sounded like nothing in the face of barbed expletives launched at her from someone she hardly knew. She felt the tears moving to launch themselves from her eyes and she couldn't do it in front of Ino.
After all of her encouragement she'll hate me for still being this emotionally weak
She turned to face Ino with wet eyes and mouthed "I'm sorry" unable to actually voice those two words lest she cry then and there. She ran off inciting jeers from Sakura's bullies.
"Hey Sakura wait-!" but she didn't listen to Ino calling after her, the cruel laughter drowning out her voice. By the time the Yamanaka had thrown some mildly poisonous flowers into the lead bully's mouth and beat the snot out of the other two Sakura was long gone.
Cursing, Ino went off to find her ignoring the teacher who was, in vain, chiding the girl for her violent behavior.
Sakura was seriously upset, crying her eyes out and trying to run as far away from Ino, whom she felt she had shamed, as possible. All of a sudden she felt a brief stab of pain on her chest and that didn't help matters at all.
The seal did that when her body demanded more crack, kind of like a weirded out warning alarm that screams "Get me the crack or I will FUCK YOU UP!" The pain started to increase in frequency like a climbing heartbeat.
She ducked into an alley and pulled out a short pipe and the small dose of solid crack her mother would give her every day. She didn't take the powdery cocaine since the seal only dealt with a crack baby's birth defects, psychological problems and smoked crack.
She started to see things and grew dizzy, her emotions went out of control and the depression tripled. Quickly, she lit the pipe and inhaled.
She smoked it for a while and felt herself stabilize. The seal calmed and all the other problems melted away. Unlike when other people took the stuff she felt no additional pleasure, the seal would keep the smoke in her for eight hours and then he'd have to smoke again.
She leaned against the wall and closed her eyes, she had grown used to having to do that, hiding somewhere every eight hours to do it. Remembering what happened at the flower fields she once again felt depression come at her.
Her head tilted to one side, adhering to gravity as many will in depression attacks.
There was Ino, right there at the alley's opening. Her eyes were wide, hand covering her mouth in complete shock. She knew what that short pipe meant, "S-Sakura..I-I"
Sakura felt her world collapse. No-one but her mother knew about her problem (except for the Hokage, but she doesn't know that and you don't need to know why until later). Here was the only other person who had accepted her and she had witnessed her do drugs. "D-did you see…?"
She never finished her sentence. She ran passed the stunned Ino in search of solace, somewhere where the world couldn't touch her, not ven her best friend who must hate her by now.
"Sakura wait!"
"Please Ino just leave me alone!" she yelled over her shoulder.
And Ino too stunned and confused to do anything else did just that. Feeling as most people will in a situation like this that it was all her fault. Guilt set in and festered.
Of course Sakura was oblivious to this, taking after one Forrest Gump she just ran. And she ran. And she ran some more. Though she didn't bump into anything the tears in her eyes made her vision just blurry enough for her not to be able to see where she was going.
When she stopped she realized this and dried her eyes on her sleeve. Unfortunately this didn't help the situation since now she had no idea where she was, she might as well have left her eyes wet.
Depression might have set again but Sakura was tired of being so helpless and weak and so she was pissed instead. She screamed at no-one in particular and hit stuff that just happened to be lying around. It would have been funny watching a seven year old beat stuff had it not been for the smoke that seemed to be coming out of her fists and feet when she hit stuff and out of her mouth when she screamed.
It was because of that that none of the low-life scum or drunken people tried to hurt her in this bad part of town. See the smoke coming from her mouth and extremities was scary as hell, not to mention the smoke messed up her voice so she sounded as if the devil was screaming in unholy agony from her lips. It was like a scene from the exorcist.
One Uzumaki Naruto just happened to live in the building where Sakura was in a demonic tantrum and of course he was just curious enough to go outside and check out what was going on. What he saw confused him.
Someone he recognized as 'that shy but pretty classmate' was either really upset and throwing a tantrum or was invoking some bizarre satanic ritual. Either way he was more than a little concerned.
"Uh, you okay?"
Sakura stopped and looked at him. His identity was at the edge of her memory but she didn't bother to pursue that. Instead she answered his question.
"Stupid question." She wasn't surprised to find that though her voice was back to normal, it was extremely hoarse.
She collapsed, exhausted
Naruto still stood there watching her; she was getting a bit uncomfortable sitting against his building in a part of town she was unfamiliar with under his gaze that was becoming more and more disconcerting.
"What?" she asked
She saw that he was getting a bit uncomfortable too. Naruto wasn't aware of what to do in a situation like this. Should he comfort her? Should he leave? Should he sprinkle her with some holy water? He wasn't sure which of the three the most intelligent thing to do was. He scratched his cheek with one finger so as to occupy his hands with something; it seemed more polite than scratching his butt.
"Your cheek, those whisker marks…Naruto?" now she remembered who he was. Instantly she knew she found just the person she needed to talk to.
"How do you take it?" she asked
"Huh?"
"Godammit, how do you keep on living?! I've seen the way everyone looks at you, and you didn't even do anything! HOW DO YOU TAKE THE PAIN?!" She realized she was being a tad overdramatic but it was one of those few moments in life where one makes allowances.
Despite being a little freaked out Naruto considered her question seriously
"I don't know, I guess…I guess I just got used to it. Before that I did what you're doing right now," he regarded her for a moment "Hey, hey why do ask exactly? Your life seems pretty blessed if you ask me…uh….what was your name anyway?"
Sakura smiled bitterly, "Sakura, my name is Sakura," she sighed. He seemed satisfied with this.
"Well then Sakura-chan, I'll say goodnight to you the-" She seemed to deflate at his words, not wanting to be left alone now that she was lost. She knew her mother wouldn't care where she was and certainly wouldn't go looking for her, not for a while anyway.
Naruto was at a loss as for what to do, he had to attend the ninja academy in the morning and didn't want to upset Iruka-sensei again by being late…but then again there was someone at his house for some reason or other that was obviously extremely depressed.
Ah screw it.
He sat down next to her, much to Sakura's surprise.
"Want to talk to me about it?"
After some hesitation she launched into an angry tirade, telling him everything against her better judgment but her anger carried her through it. Her seal, her addiction and everything that had happened to her that day.
"…and now Ino no doubt hates me not only because of my weakness but because of the drugs!" She finished this sentence in a rage. A few seconds passed where Naruto said nothing. She had finished and it was out of her system, so she began to cry.
Naruto felt awkward. Really he expecting some kind of girly problem like "Sasuke-kun thinks I'm ugly" or "My favorite dress got ruined", whatever he was expecting it wasn't this.
"Um-uh, wow that sucks…" He felt like an ass saying that, so he put a comforting hand on the pinkette's shoulder. This seemed to calm her sobbing and she stopped.
A moment passed, spent on Sakura's part in thought. Naruto was just sitting there holding her shoulder awkwardly feeling like an idiot.
"I can't show my face at the academy again, it would be too painful to be near those bullies, even more painful around Ino" she said in a tone of finality.
"What'll you do about your ninja education then?"
"I'll apply for self-study and training, so long as I have the proper curriculum on paper I know I can teach myself to be an above average shinobi, plus I'm thinking of creating a style based on that smoke you saw earlier" she smiled
"Hey why don't you join me?"
"Huh?"
"I just told you stuff I would never tell another human being just because you happened to be there when I was angry, don't think that doesn't mean anything," she realized that she didn't talk this way to anyone else, finding that she trusted the more miserable boy because she was like him, essentially: alone.
"Plus I've noticed that every teacher at the academy except maybe Iruka hates you and stunts your education, but if you trained with me you could progress normally I'm sure."
Naruto's head was spinning, he really hadn't caught half of what she had said but her offer was tempting. He knew the teachers were against him, and upon remembering how well Sakura was in school he knew that training with her would no doubt bear fruit.
"Is that even possible Sakura-chan?"
"Yeah it is." She offered him her hand, a gesture that said 'join me Luke and the power of the dark side will be unstoppable!' Not really, but they both knew if he took it he would leave the academy and place his education in the hands of a girl his age. So long as they could pass the genin exam they could be ninja.
It felt weird placing all of his trust in a girl he hardly knew but against his better judgment Naruto did. They shook hands and the deal was done.