A/N: I've been trying to brainstorm an idea for a new story, and this is what I came up with. It's a one shot... Thank you to CuteLikeMomiji, because she gave me an idea (though she may not have realized it). Hope you don't get angry at me for it.
EDIT: Thanks again to CuteLikeMomiji, because she made me realize that maybe I should add a reason for Shikamaru's participation. And the format for the story was a bit weird, with some parts centred and some parts aligned to left (as it should be). I fixed it, so hopefully now it's not strange.
I'm sorta aiming at humour for this story, so give me feedback on that please! What made you laugh, lame jokes, stuff like that.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Contest of the Competitive
Featuring: Might Guy, Kakashi Hatake, Rock Lee, Choji Akimichi, Shikamaru Nara, Kiba Inuzuka, and Naruto Uzumaki.
It was raining in Konoha. Again. Some villagers feared that the village was going to flood. Everyone was in a dreary mood. Even the enthusiastic Hokage (who goes by the name of Naruto Uzumaki) was feeling a bit down. He sat in his office, surrounded by the usual ANBU, as well as Sakura. Believe it or not, she still isn't over Sasuke. And on this gloomy day, she thought of him. She shook her head, as if trying to shake out the memories of him. Luckily, Naruto was too busy examining the stacks of paperwork infront of him to notice.
After a while, Naruto jolted up in his seat and groaned. "I give up! Being Hokage is wonderful and everything, but I hate these stupid papers of hell! I'm going to carry all of this crap and shove it into the freaking recycling bin!" He grabbed the tower infront of him and walked over to the empty recycling bin. When he came back he did the same and was about to drop it in when one of the papers caught his eye.
"A letter from Gaara!" In his surprise, Naruto actually did drop the papers into the recycling bin. "Crap!" He plunged his arms into the bin to search for the precious note. Sakura simply walked to where Naruto was, bent down, and picked up the page lying right beside him. She read it, her eyes brightening as she did, and declared, "Found it!" in a very cheerful voice.
Naruto jerked his hands out of the blue box, and snatched the note from Sakura. "Lemme see!"
Naruto,
It is me, Gaara. The people in Suna are very depressed right now, as there is drought here. I have heard that while we are lacking water here, Konoha has been receiving too much water, in the form of rain. I thought maybe you could gather some of your water, and meet at the border to trade.
Reply soon, as I fear for the health of my fellow villagers.
~Sabaku no Gaara
"Let's do it!" Naruto punched a fist into the air. "Tell the village to gather as much rainwater as they can, in buckets, pots, bowls, whatever!" He commanded the ANBU. "Yes sir!" They replied in unison, and left in a poof of smoke.
"Sakura!" Naruto turned to the bright-haired girl. "Tell Kakashi, and both of the Bushy Brows to come to my office A.S.A.P.!"
"Sure!" Sakura turned to jump through the window then hesitated. Everybody used the window all the time! It was time for some creativity around here! She grinned and bashed a large hole in the wall next to the window with a single punch, then leaped through.
"Showoff." Naruto decided after she was out of earshot. He sat down in his comfy leather chair, and started writing his reply.
Gaara,
Expect so much water, that we might flood the desert! I've got some crazy competitive maniacs working on it, and they're not going to stop until the rain stops! Your Welcome, Gaara Buddy!
~Naruto Uzumaki, Greatest Hokage of ALL TIME!
"Send this to Suna!" Naruto handed his letter over to another ANBU. This ANBU leaped through hole Sakura made. He shouted over his shoulder, "Nice wall adjustment! Windows are so over-used!"
Naruto chuckled and rubbed his hands in anticipation. This was going to be fun.
"Why am I here, Naruto?" Kakashi asked lazily.
"Give us a challenge that will fill us with the Flame of Youth!" Lee suggested excitedly.
"No, give us a challenge that will not only fill us with the Flame of Youth(!), but also let us prove ourselves to our rivals." Guy glared in Kakashi's direction.
"Fine! Here's the contest. You see all this rain?" The Bushy Brows nodded vigorously. "I need you to fill up as many buckets with that rain as much as you can! The water has to be clean, so no scooping up water from the ground! Whoever wins... whoever wins... will get to spar with me, the Hokage, to test their youthfullness! And if Kakashi wins, he gets a book written by Jiraiya, that was never released!"
"Now we're talking!" Kakashi jumped up from where he was sitting.
"Get ready, set, go!" Naruto yelled. They took off, as fast as the roadrunner escaping from the wolf.
"Cheaters! They left at 'set'!" Sakura complained.
"24!" Lee dropped off his bucket at the front gate.
"27!" Guy slammed his on the ground and grabbed another one.
"28." Kakashi said smugly as he left his.
"Ahhh! Kakashi! You are a worthy opponent!" And the Bushy Brows took off.
"Summoning Jutsu!" Kakashi laid his hand on the ground, and 8 dogs appeared from thin air. The smallest one, Pakkun, looked as lazy as Kakashi.
"What do you need this time, Kakashi?"
"I need you guys to fill buckets with rainwater, and return them here when they're full. Then grab another one and fill that one up. And so on..."
"You heard that, team! Let's go!" Kakashi and the dogs dispersed in different directions.
Izumo and Kotetsu were keeping score, monitering the gate as well as the game. "Well, this is interesting." Kotetsu commented.
"Naruto is such a clever Hokage! Getting the most competitive ninja and presenting this task as a contest!" Izumo praised.
"Naruto's not clever at all!" Kiba protested as he walked towards them. "What has the world come to, for you to say that?" "Arff!" Akamaru added.
The two guards looked at eachother, then at Kiba. "Uhhh... Don't really know how to answer that, but Kakashi, Guy and Lee are having a contest."
"A contest? What are the rules?"
"... Simply fill as many buckets of rainwater as you can."
"Start counting for me!" Kiba grasped two bucket handles, giving one to Akamaru. "Now!"
"Say what?" Shikamaru and Choji showed up. "A contest?"
This competition was going to last for a while.
"Whatcha you doing, Guy?" Kakashi called as he passed by Might Guy.
Guy was holding a gigantic funnel the size of a house above one of his buckets. He had chosen a nice, open location where the rain was freely falling to the ground, without trees or buildings in the way.
Shikamaru was sitting on the highest point of a tree and holding out a pail to catch the rain. He wasn't really sure why he was doing this: it was much too troublesome. Maybe it was because nobody wanted to play shogi with him, because everybody was under-the-weather. Who knows? All he knew was that he was in this, and he might as well finish it. He looked down at Guy below. "He can't possibly hope to use that for one bucket! He'd waste precious water." Then he noticed Lee down there, with about 20 buckets. "Oh."
"Now, Lee." Guy reminded his student. "You must distribute the buckets to both my score and yours. To count all the buckets as yours would be wrong and unyouthful."
"Yes sir!" Lee saluted.
Shikamaru made his way to the main gate and waited. Sooner or later, Lee would come over here and he'd steal the buckets, one by one. And he did. "Gotcha!" Shikamaru exclaimed with triumph as he caught Lee in his shadow possession jutsu. "178 for Shikamaru Nara!"
He controlled Lee, switching the buckets for Guy and returning the filled one to the main gate. "179!"
Choji wasn't very good at this... It wasn't like you could speed up the process of filling up a pail of water. It took a while, and Choji needed an idea, or he would lose! So he pondered it, while dangling a bucket in the air. "No, wouldn't work, water from the ground doesn't count... wait... I have an idea!" He crowed.
~Later~
Choji was completely COVERED in sponges. Sponges on his arms, his legs, his torso, his head... Even his forehead and his chin. He decided to try this outside the village, to avoid major destruction. Kotetsu and Izumo stared at him as he toddled by.
"I hope this works... Super Expansion Jutsu!" Choji grew and grew, until he became a giant. He towered over the trees, and the village below. He looked down and... "Yes!" The sponges that had covered his body had enlarged like his clothes did. Now all he had to do was kick back and let the sponges absorb the rain.
Kiba was finding himself in the same situation as Choji. There wasn't anything that he could do except use his speed to fill up as many buckets as possible. Damn it! He desperately wished he had better jutsu for a situation like this.
"The final rainbucket contest results are here!" Kotetsu announced:
Rock Lee - 277 buckets!
Choji Akimichi - 266 buckets!
Kiba Inuzuka - 245 buckets!
Might Guy - 288 buckets! "Yes! Beat that, Kakashi!"
Kakashi Hatake - 289 buckets! "I win, Guy."
Shikamaru Nara - 357 buckets! "We have a winner!"
"That's not fair, Shikamaru used his shadow thing and stole our buckets!" Kiba yelled.
"You were allowed to use jutsu." Izumo said. "It was in the rules."
"Yeah well, the rules can go to- wait, rules? Who the heck made up rules for something like this?"
"The Hokage. He was bored."
"Damn it, Naruto!" Kiba swore. "I'll kill you!"
