My first shot at a Mentalist fic! We'll see how this goes.. sorta Jisbon, but not how you might expect it to be.
I would like to stress that this is a one-shot fic! I will not be adding onto it or expanding it by any means, so save your story alerts for next time.
As always, reviews are greatly appreciated, whether the content is good or bad. All feedback is welcome. :)
This little note would be incomplete if I neglected to mention the wonderful Jenn (dwennie). She might live across the continent, but she's still my best friend, and without her getting me all addicted to reading fanfics and inspiring me to write them, this story would be totally nonexistent. So thank you, Jenn. I love you, and this is dedicated 100% to you, m'dear.
On with the story;
She had walked away. She had to; she couldn't lay there any longer, feigning sleep, when the emotional release was eating her up on the inside. She hadn't expected that - it was just sex, after all .. right? It didn't mean anything to either of them; just a way to release some pent up stress, but nothing more.
But if it was just sex, then why did she feel like this?
She walked on as the early morning greeted her, watching as the sunrise broke over the trees in the distance. She bit her bottom lip and tugged on it for a while, wondering what to do about how she was feeling. Did she regret what they had done? No, of course not. It was wonderful, and not a far reach to say it was one of the best nights she'd ever spent with a man. She never expected to be feeling this way afterward, though. An uncomfortable sensation that she refused to acknowledge had bubbled up inside of her, and she wanted no part of it. She knew she couldn't deny it forever, but fear overtook any thoughts of enjoying it. She couldn't be in love with Patrick Jane. It was simply unheard of. It couldn't possibly work out between them, what with her addiction to work and his obsession with revenge. He was a nuisance, always annoying her for the sheer pleasure of it. Most days, she could barely stand being in the same room as the man.
She continued on her walk, suddenly overwhelmed with dread. This wasn't happening. She couldn't - no, wouldn't let it happen. No matter what, she would not let herself fall for him .. even if it broke both their hearts in the process.
He awoke with a smile on his face; after the night he'd just shared with Lisbon, he couldn't help it. He had grown to love her quite a while ago, never having figured it would amount to anything. But here they were. It was a beautiful thing, the love they'd made. He could think of no other way to describe it. He had imagined for a while what it might be like to spend a night with Teresa Lisbon, but his dreams fell short in comparison to the real thing. The gentle touches, the lingering kisses, the groans of pleasure - it was all perfect. He gave a contented sigh as he relived the memories in his head. Of course, they didn't have to just be memories; he had plenty of energy for more by now ..
He rolled over, expecting one of two things; the pleasure of watching her sleep, or the delight of her bright green eyes sparkling back at him. He couldn't deny his disappointment at being greeted by nothing but an empty bed. A frown threatened to tug at the corners of his lips as a feeling of dread began to nag at the pit of his stomach; where was Lisbon? He tried to calm himself, thinking of all the reasons why she wasn't lying next to him right now. She was in the shower; he stopped to listen, but it was so silent that he could hear a pin drop. She was making breakfast; he wandered downstairs, but her apartment was seemingly deserted. He felt a rush of sadness at the thought that she had left him there, and the feeling in his stomach only intensified. Why would she have gone, after they'd had such a great night? He knew she loved him; he'd known it for weeks now. So why the disappearing act? For once, he didn't have any answers, and that thought alone was enough to frighten him.
{About 8 hours later.}
Lisbon unlocked the door to her apartment, taking a deep breath before finally stepping inside. Jane looked up from his spot on the couch, his sad blue eyes meeting hers in a way that made her heart clench. In that moment alone, she almost let her guard slip; almost gave in to the feelings tingling inside that she now knew were there for a reason. The intensity of their gaze was rising, and she knew her resolve would slip if she didn't speak up soon. She shifted her eyes to the floor, shutting the door behind her before she sheepishly made her way to the couch. Jane stood as she approached, reaching out to clutch her wrists, willing her to look back up at him.
He stroked the back of her hand with his thumb, leaning forward to whisper into her hair. "Why did you leave me this morning, Teresa? I don't underst-"
"Stop, Jane. I can't do this." she uttered the last sentence weakly, finally lifting her green eyes, dulled with the sadness of the moment, to meet his confused expression. "It wasn't supposed to be like this; it wasn't. It .. it was just supposed to be sex, y'know? No emotion, just the phys-"
"Teresa, you can't really think-"
"No, please. Don't interrupt me. I need to say this." she pleaded, willing him to understand how important this was. "I wasn't expecting to feel anything for you from all of this, and I thought we were both on the same page. Just sex. No feelings, no emotions." She shifted her gaze momentarily, dropping her hands as he moved to caress her face. She let out a deep sigh, frustrated at the sensations such a simple touch could arouse. "I was wrong, Jane. I'm not sure how I could have thought having sex would be so meaningless for me, especially with you. But I can't do it, Jane. I can't care for you the way you deserve; I can't love you like I ought to, and I can't bare to see you hurt if I let this continue." A tear slipped down her cheek, and Jane remained silent as he tenderly wiped it away. "I love you, Jane. I do. But I just can't do this. I .. I need you to leave now." She was whispering by the time she finished, and her eyes once again sought the floor, avoiding the hurt she knew would be evident in Jane's expression.
"Teresa.." his voice was rough, full of raw emotion and the hint of tears. He had already been hurt once by lost love, and he didn't know if he could handle it a second time. "I love you, too, Teresa. Please don't make me leave." He leaned his forehead against hers, both their tears falling and mingling over their lips as they came together. He gripped her shoulders, kissing her gently at first, but becoming more passionate as the seconds passed. She didn't resist him or turn away, but she didn't make any effort to return the sentiment either. She couldn't deny the effect his kiss was having on her; the reactions it ignited under her skin; but she refused to let her self-control waver any more than it already had at this point. When she finally started to push against his chest, he pulled back slowly, trying to read her face for any sort of reaction. What he saw there terrified him as he realized she wasn't going to change her mind. They loved each other and she was going to send him away. He could hardly believe it.
"Patrick.." her voice was watery as she grabbed his hands and pulled him gently toward the door. The tears were still streaming quickly, and she tried to wipe them away with her free hand to no avail. She opened the door with a shaky sigh, letting go of his hand. He stood in the doorway, just staring at her. After a pause he motioned to wipe the tears from her face, but she turned her head away. "Please. Just go." With that final pleading statement, taking every ounce of her being not to give in to him, she closed the door, leaned back against it, and wept. Jane stood outside, completely speechless. Tears burned hot behind his eyes, and an overwhelming sense of loss seemed to drown him. What had seemed inevitable just this morning was now gone forever, and he hated it. He took a few steps, taking all the energy he could muster in pounding his fist into the wall. The pain brought little relief, and all he could do was slump back against the wall and wallow in his tears. He had always been so sure that two was better than one.
I remember what you wore on that first day
You came into my life and I thought
"Hey, you know, this could be something"
'Cause everything you do and words you say
You know that it all takes my breath away
And now I'm left with nothing
So maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
And maybe two is better than one
But there's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one
I remember every look upon your face
The way you roll your eyes
The way you taste
You make it hard for breathing
'Cause when I close my eyes and drift away
I think of you and everything's okay
I'm finally now believing
The End
I'm such a jerk, I know. But honestly, who really likes happy endings anyway? Certainly not me .. ;)
You must be thinking that Lisbon is insane. I mean, if Patrick Jane offered the same to me, who am I to refuse? OH WAIT. He's like 41. -sniff- ;~;
-clears throat-
Again, please leave a review to let me know what you think - is it totally OOC? did the storyline suck? was the not-so-happy ending simply cruel of me?
Or, y'know, you could say something positive. Or both. Whatever you prefer. 0:-) -prods review button-
Also, song at the end is Two Is Better Than One by Boys Like Girls feat. Taylor Swift.
Imo, amazing song. Listen to it if you haven't already.