A/N : Alright, I love to write sad stuff. Don't ask why.
Disclaimer : I own nothing.
What sucks about imprinting is that you are so utterly devoted to that person, it's like nothing else in the world even matters. It's all about them. Whatever you want doesn't count for shit. Because all you really want is to see them happy.
My whole world came crashing down when I saw my imprint laying in the arms of another man. Not that we were together. But it hurt. A lot. I was her best friend, though. So, of course, I got to hear all the details.
She liked him because he was so much like her. Nahuel was a half-breed, just like her. He was part vampire. He understood what she was going through. He didn't baby her just because she was part human. She could tolerate him.
She said she loved me. And I knew she meant it. She loved me like the brother she never had. I should be happy with that, right? She'll come around eventually, right? She'll love me like I love her.
I had to be whatever she wanted. Right now, it was a best friend. She didn't need me anymore. No, she was a big girl now. I knew that if she ever needed taking care of, her boyfriend would help her. Isn't that what lovers were for?
My Renesmee was definitely growing up. I should know from all the times I've walked in on her and Nahuel. I'm shaking with anger now. He doesn't deserve her. He will never love her like I do. That's a fact. I'm her perfect soul mate, right?
Maybe my father's right. Maybe we are too different.
"Jacob!" she calls out. "Where are you going?"
I don't want to tell her that I can't stand that she looks at him the way she should look at me. She kisses him the way she should kiss me. He is supposed to be me.
"Patrol," I lie easily. I've been lying for so long, what difference does it make?
Sometimes, I blame Bella and Edward. After all, they were the ones who said I couldn't tell her what she meant to me until she made the first move. I agreed at the time, because I was sure she would. Now? Not so much.
I wish I could kill myself easily. But, no matter what I do, I am only left with some sort of mess to clean up.
So every night I come home and drink my pain away. I moved out of Billy's a while back, so it was only me and the whiskey. It took me to a happier place.
When I closed my eyes, I could imagine getting home late one day, my Nessie waiting up for me, even though I'd tell her not to. She'd smile and jump into my arms and kiss me silly. We'd have a baby sleeping in the corner of our bedroom in a crib, on with brown eyes and red hair just like her.
In my dreams, she loved me the way she was supposed to. Like how fate wanted it. Though, if fate had anything to do with it, we'd just be two people.
Maybe, if we were human, things would be better. Because everyone knows that, in the end, the shape-shifter never wins.
She'll call me tomorrow, I know. Thursday nights are hunting for us. And I will go with a big smile.
What she wanted, she got.
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